withdrawal advice please

[DeMaria]

Short version:

I've been on opioids for a while, starting with oxycontin in 2007 and transitioning to MS Contin since 2016. I know I need to get off them for good. I was prescribed them for a car accident injury, but now I'm stuck in a cycle. I function well, taking my prescribed dose responsibly, but the addiction weighs heavily on me. As the breadwinner and business owner, I can't afford withdrawal, but I'm desperate to quit. Has anyone successfully overcome opioid addiction with responsibilities like mine? I feel trapped and need to end the addiction.


Long version:

I've been on opioids for quite some time now. From 2007 to 2016, I took oxycontin, and since then, I've been on MS Contin. Technically, it's even longer if you count vicodin and percs, but I don't. Yes, they're opioids, but I always saw those kind of as child's play; the gateway opioid, if you will. The bottom line is, I really need to get off MS Contin and never touch opioids again which is exactly what would happen. There is no more thrill seeking addiction left in me, it went out the window when I got married and became a father -- I would never risk anything now. In fact, the current risk of taking my prescribed dose orally is already enough risk. I worry all the time (even though my tolerance is sky high.)

Anyway, I was prescribed them for a car accident injury, and before I knew it, I felt stuck in a cycle. You know how it goes. After nearly a decade of abusing oxy, I made the move to MS Contin, which probably saved my life. The thing is, I function well because I don't abuse what I'm prescribed anymore. I have a family, a successful law firm, and numerous demands on my time. However, I have this addiction that I can't shake. To be honest, I don't even try anymore because it would jeopardize everything in my life. I take my ms contin as prescribed, 30 mg in the morning, noon, and night, totaling 90 mg per day. I never deviate from the regimen. It helps control my pain, but other than that, I don't feel it in any "high" sense. I take it very responsibly to manage pain and avoid withdrawal.

As the sole breadwinner in my family, as well as the owner of a growing business (6 years in), I can't afford to go through withdrawal. But, seriously, I need to stop this. I'll deal with the pain waiting for me on the other side; I just want the addiction to end. I can't stand it, and my kids are reaching an age (pre-teens) where they could easily find out. For their whole lives, they thought I took stomach meds... I pray that continues and then this whole thing will be forgotten to time.

Has anyone successfully overcome this and managed to get off opioids, particularly with a workload and expectations like mine? It feels like walking a tightrope without a safety net below. I'm scared to even taper by 15 mg at a time because I feel mildly sick every two days anyway, even without changing my dose, just from tolerance issues and whatever damage I've done to my nerve endings, cells, ugh... it makes me sick to think about it. I wish ms contin came in 5 mg pills; then, I could taper without feeling it so much. I feel trapped, and this addiction needs to end.

-Desperate

 

[pnillyg]

Iboga and or Ibogane… clears full physical dependence and mental… (overnight) it’s a bizarre medicine. Look it up if you got time specifically for addiction but many other health problems too. Saved me before

 

[Jabberwocky]

Have you ever considered suboxone or methadone?
You won’t get the same pain relief, but I believe you said you’d deal with that.
You could make the switch, and then begin to taper down, little by little.

 

[Justadudeondrugs]

if only it where that easy, we wouldnt all be here. Im in the same boat. One pay check from disaster but even tapering makes functioning difficult. . Most folks have trouble even tapering without slipping . if you can keep busy meatily and keep tapering , thats the only thing that worked for Me in the past . If you had a week or more that you could take time off and use benzos to sleep the last week off its almost like a re-set in your brain ( for me anyway) but you have to cut ties with your supplier.. before I was in a financial hole I went to Alaska to try to stay away , 6k road trip to stay away and every time , I return home and re start the cycle...its awful I hope for everyone on here there is an easy way out someday

 

[DeMaria]

if only it where that easy, we wouldnt all be here. Im in the same boat. One pay check from disaster but even tapering makes functioning difficult. . Most folks have trouble even tapering without slipping . if you can keep busy meatily and keep tapering , thats the only thing that worked for Me in the past . If you had a week or more that you could take time off and use benzos to sleep the last week off its almost like a re-set in your brain ( for me anyway) but you have to cut ties with your supplier.. before I was in a financial hole I went to Alaska to try to stay away , 6k road trip to stay away and every time , I return home and re start the cycle...its awful I hope for everyone on here there is an easy way out someday

Back in 2006-2011, I was in a situation similar to what you're describing. Now, I have a legitimate prescription and a medical reason for continuing this lifestyle—ironically, I didn't have when I started.

I've been responsible with my meds since I got married in 2012, never abusing them—not even 1 mg. While I do have psychological dependence (we all do by definition) it's the solely the physical aspect that concerns me now, so l stick to my current regimen.

I'm prepared to handle any mental challenges as they arise and will never return to opioids again.

I can manage long-term physical pain through treatments like injections or surgery, but it's the short-term withdrawal pain that scares me most because I know exactly what to expect.

Withdrawal memories often trap us in cycles. I'm confident that my days of relapse and lack of self-control are behind me. I'm extremely cautious—I never take extra meds or mix substances. I even declined using Zofran for flu-induced nausea due to its potentially fatal side effect. My family's well-being is my priority, and I've quit alcohol to avoid any interactions that could harm me.
know that’s the oldest cliche, but I’m a completely different person now.

Opioids are only in my life because I’m afraid of the repercussions of full blown dope sickness on my family and business (and blood pressure!) — even though I know 1-4 weeks of suffering will do me a world of good in the long run. Point is: I was in a weaker state before I had a family and my own business. My past relapses occurred when I had less to lose and was more reckless. Family doesn’t change everyone but it sure changed me. Even as I write this, I’m watching one of my sons play baseball with his team, he just said to me over the right field fence, “Dad, how was my last at-bat?!” I mean.. I just don’t know how people risk losing that.

So basically now I’m living with what I perceive to be the lesser evil (lifelong controlled opioid treatment) rather than the inevitable, which is to turn my world upside down, risking financial and familial turmoil. My f-ing mortgage payment alone is more than I used to make in a year when my career began 20 years ago. When I say there’s no room for error, I really do mean it. You’d probably laugh if I showed you the numbers, the work I do, the high stakes, etc. I’m in NY too, where the cost of living is sky high. This whole thing is bigger than my silly pill addiction, but ironically it’s that very addiction that could f*ck up my whole life. In other words: I’m doing the thing that has far less of a chance of wrecking my life TODAY. Short sighted, weak, and irresponsible, but for all the right reasons. I might be the most mature, considerate addict in the world. Lol

The thought of anything jeopardizing my family's stability affects me more than any drug could. To put it plainly, my bags are packed, I’ve got my discharge papers in hand, and I’m waiting at the wide open chopper door. And when it flies low enough, I’m f*cking leaping… I just need the ground to meet me halfway.

 

[DeMaria]

Iboga and or Ibogane… clears full physical dependence and mental… (overnight) it’s a bizarre medicine. Look it up if you got time specifically for addiction but many other health problems too. Saved me before

I’ve looked into it, but it seems too risky on its own; cardiovascular problems and all that. I’m trying to do this in a minimal-risk fashion. I love the idea of it though and I think it’s awesome that it saved you.

 

[DeMaria]

Have you ever considered suboxone or methadone?
You won’t get the same pain relief, but I believe you said you’d deal with that.
You could make the switch, and then begin to taper down, little by little.

I’ve thought about that many times over the years. What’s the discomfort level like? Doesn’t that have its own comparable withdrawal?

 

[Jabberwocky]

I’ve thought about that many times over the years. What’s the discomfort level like? Doesn’t that have its own comparable withdrawal?

Yeah, they all come with pros and cons.. but it depends on what your ultimate goal is.

I’ve read some good things about memantine on this forum. I have zero experience with it myself though.

 

[Pickledlemons]

Well there's some maintenance drugs to choose from that should relieve most of your withdrawal and improve your financial situation... though of course that also still leaves you taking something every day. There's suboxone, thats what I take. It would probably be considered the weaker of the two pharmaceutical options, because its a partial agonist, so its difficult to get high off, but I mean, it can still give you a decent glow, at first anyway.

Methadone is the more serious option, for people where suboxone isn't enough. You usually have to go into the clinic to take your dose every day since you absolutely can get high off methadone.

If for whatever reason you can't get ahold of either of those, for insurance reasons or whatever, there's also Kratom, its a dried leaf with opioid effects that is legal in most places and rather cheap to buy online. The biggest problem with it is its short duration. It only lasts 3-5 hours. But hey, if its all you can get, then its better than nothing. Also it sounds good to people who have that whole 'natural is good' mindset.

 

[Pickledlemons]

I’ve thought about that many times over the years. What’s the discomfort level like? Doesn’t that have its own comparable withdrawal?

Depends what you choose, if its Kratom or Suboxone there will probably be a bit of a transition period. With suboxone especially. They used to tell you to stay off all opioids for 24 hours before taking it to avoid precipitated withdrawal ( it has a very high binding affinity, meaning it will force all remaining opioids in the brain out, and it is extremely painful.)

But anyway with all the weird shit showing up in opioids these days, that rule doesn't seem to work anymore, some people wait a week and still get precipitated withdrawal. If you're taking legit oxy though, the 24 hr rule might work. Anyway, just talk to a doctor about it, if you are able. They might do the burnese method (sp?) where they gradually introduce it to your system while slowly taking away the oxy.

Methadone should be - relatively painless. But is also the most extreme option.

If you are unable to see a doctor... Then Kratom. There's no risk of precipitated withdrawal or anything, but it is weaker, so it will still take some adjusting. Still compared to CT, it will be much softer.

 

[ElBarone]

Short version:

I've been on opioids for a while, starting with oxycontin in 2007 and transitioning to MS Contin since 2016. I know I need to get off them for good. I was prescribed them for a car accident injury, but now I'm stuck in a cycle. I function well, taking my prescribed dose responsibly, but the addiction weighs heavily on me. As the breadwinner and business owner, I can't afford withdrawal, but I'm desperate to quit. Has anyone successfully overcome opioid addiction with responsibilities like mine? I feel trapped and need to end the addiction.


Long version:

I've been on opioids for quite some time now. From 2007 to 2016, I took oxycontin, and since then, I've been on MS Contin. Technically, it's even longer if you count vicodin and percs, but I don't. Yes, they're opioids, but I always saw those kind of as child's play; the gateway opioid, if you will. The bottom line is, I really need to get off MS Contin and never touch opioids again, which I know is what would happened. There is no more thrill seeking addiction left in me, it went out the window when I got married and became a father -- I would never risk anything now. In fact, the current risk of taking my prescribed dose orally is already enough risk. I worry all the time (even though my tolerance is sky high.)

Anyway, I was prescribed them for a car accident injury, and before I knew it, I felt stuck in a cycle. You know how it goes. After nearly a decade of abusing oxy, I made the move to MS Contin, which probably saved my life. The thing is, I function well because I don't abuse what I'm prescribed anymore. I have a family, a successful law firm, and numerous demands on my time. However, I have this addiction that I can't shake. To be honest, I don't even try anymore because it would jeopardize everything around me. I take my ms contin as prescribed, 30 mg in the morning, noon, and night, totaling 90 mg per day. I never deviate from the regimen. It helps control my pain, but other than that, I don't feel it in any "high" sense. I take it very responsibly to manage pain and avoid withdrawal.

As the sole breadwinner in my family, as well as the owner of a growing business (6 years in), I can't afford to go through withdrawal. But, seriously, I need to stop this. I'll deal with the pain waiting for me on the other side; I just want the addiction to end. I can't stand it, and my kids are reaching an age (pre-teens) where they could easily find out. For their whole lives, they thought I take stomach meds... I pray that continues and then this whole thing will be forgotten to time.

Has anyone successfully overcome this and managed to get off opioids, particularly with a workload and expectations like mine? It feels like walking a tightrope without a safety net below. I'm scared to even taper by 15 mg at a time because I feel mildly sick every two days anyway, even without changing my dose, just from tolerance issues and whatever damage I've done to my nerve endings, cells, ugh... it makes me sick to think about it. I wish ms contin came in 5 mg pills; then, I could taper without feeling it so much. I feel trapped, and this addiction needs to end.

-Desperate

I’m a bit late to this as i rarely come on here, however i read this with interest.

I am in a very similar situation. Opioids for the past 8 years, prescribed for an injury. I take Dihydrocodeine (DHC) which is about 20% the strength of morphine, but i take quite high doses, 300mg 3 times a day, 900mg total.

I have 2 businesses, i sit on the board of 2 others, have 3 kids and live in London and a place in the country. I’m not blowing my trumpet, just providing some context, i have a high-functioning full on life.

I now purely take the DHC to hold off withdrawals
and manage pain, its just completely part of my life, every 8 hours or so i eat pills and my mildly aching legs and sweats go away. i try to look at it like i have a condition which makes me very sick, and this is the medication i need to feel well, it makes it a tiny bit more palatable and is of course quite true in a way. I wish i just felt normal everyday, i think i feel normal most of the time bit can’t help thinking how i would feel without it, it undoubtedly has affected my concentration and drive, but i function ok

Recently my prescription delivery was delayed and i went 24 hours without, and it was absolute agony, there was a chance it would be delayed another 24 hours and i went into complete panic mode, about to cancel all of my meetings and family commitments and head to bed with a ‘serious virus’ (like many others no-one knows the extent of my situation, my partner realises i take painkillers but wouldn’t have a clue how many) . Thankfully the delivery arrived the following morning, i was in a terrible state, especially trying to hide how i felt..within one hour i was at work leading a meeting, cracking jokes and generally performing well..insane really

I’m desperate to quit too, this recent episode truly drilled home what a slave i am, god only knows what would have happened if it went on for another few days, i am now so careful to have supply stored everywhere i am, just in case, including a little pill case i keep on me at all times (what a life)

i can only really see tapers as the way forward but i always fail. Very very slow tapers, 10% drops and then waiting to stabilise (can take 3 weeks from my experience) is probably the least painful option, still
feel it but you can function fine, you’ll just be in a filthy mood! Have you tried that, takes immense discipline

Also how about pregabalin, i think its called Lyrica over there, this is a miracle drug for opiate withdrawals, literally gets rid of 80% (for
some people) however for me the withdrawals coming of that are just as bad, and even after a short amount of time, so i just can’t do it

Anyway i wish you luck, keep in touch

 

[Jnowhere]

I had pancreatitus, before that I was diagnosed and hospitalized in Dec 2015 for 2-3 weeks and diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver( yes I know I have told this same true story a thousand times) this was about 2 weeks after my mother died of complications of cirrhosis of the liver.

I had 7 1/2 liters of fluided drained from my stomach and all sorts of shit, I was near death. I was given 1 year to live, I basically was told you have to go down to some place in Detroit and piss into a cup everyday for 6 months before we will put you on the organ donor list. Fuck that, I wanted to still drink some and Detroit is not peaceful, beautiful vacation destination it is made out to be. Lol, sorry I needed to make myself laugh.

Because of my bad liver I couldn't have anything with acetaminophen/paracetamol/ Tylenol
I was on oxycodone and around the clock morphine.

My pain lessoned and I wanted off the morphine. Basically I was told by some people at Bluelight in August 2023; the same thing my doctor prescribed me.
Clonidine 0.1mg, 10mg×3 times a day Valium( I was actually on a stronger benzo, Ativan but wanted to cut back)and gabapentin 3×300mg a day.
Gabapentin and those drugs really helped me off of the morphine. The gabapentin worked great( I read Lyrica, it's big brother, is even better). The clonidine( which like the gabapentin was used off label, it is a blood pressure med or something) and the Valium, which at 30mg was actually half the equivalent dose of Ativan( lorazepam) I was on.

Even though I cut my benzo use in half, I still felt ok on the clonidine, gabapentin, and Valium and was off morphine.

I didn't need it anymore and have much less pain but those three drugs,( clonidine( not scheduled) Valium, and gabapentin) and after about 7 1/2 years I was off morphine and there really was no issue. I was comfortable, although I did cut my dose in half for a week before stopping the morphine.

But gabapentin( Lyrica would have probably worked better) Valium(10mg ×3 times a day) and clonidine 0.1 ×3 times a day. Even though I had been on 2mg×3 times a day of Ativan; 1mg of Ativan =10mg Valium, so 6mg= 60mg of Valium, even that drop was ok.

But, basically those drugs helped me off morphine.( Lyrica and Ativan 2mg×3 times a day would have been probably better), not sure but those 3 drugs helped me not only function while withdrawaling but made me not really notice.

I have only ever been psychologically addicted to nicotine, I could control my drinking but I didn't want too, but I eventually did.

Also there are some supplements that may also help. Hopefully someone on here knows which ones. Good luck.

 

[Opana313]

Yeah the hardest part is finding the time while having family. I found my use getting out of control because of all the stressers (shit like I can't be late or call out in fear of losing my Job because my wife had surgeries and my kids get sick and dr appointments, plus life happens. I wish bosses/corps understood this more and be more reasonable)
now I am trying to get PTO up to get like 3 crowns and probably an implant for my teeth(fucking subs I swear) and when I do take this time off, I am going to drop the whole covid/flu thing so my family actually allows me to rest and reset (and my job) otherwise NO I have to keep on using whatever just to get by and it has fucked me up financially many times, currently crawling out of a hole right now..
SO now I have made the switch to subs over the past year or more and it definitely helps with the whole chasing aspect..the fact you do not even go over 1mg says lots about how responsible your dependence is. I think with a leave of absence of some sort and a strategy with, comfort meds..you can get through this.

 

[Opana313]

Even without all comfort meds you can still do it, pure hell but always do-able. Staying clean and not depressed afterward is the next hurdle and it's no fucking joke PAWS sucks.