arthunter888
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 23, 2009
- Messages
- 623
I have and always have had a strong romantic/physical attraction fetish/preference for brunette women that have very light skin. I just find this [dark hair + light skin] look incredibly attractive (idk maybe it's the visual contrast that catches my eye, or there's something about this that makes them look 'pure', innocent, or angelic, in some way - just brainstorming).
Anyway, I've noticed (from my personal experience) that these women all tend to have similar personality traits such as extreme shyness and passiveness. I realize women inherently tend to be more passive than men, but this type of woman seems to be even more passive than other types of women. Fortunately I happen to find shyness a bit attractive as well.
Unfortunately, I've noticed a lot of negative traits. It seems like they are always psychologically 'damaged' in some way. Some examples: they have much less ability to communicate internal conflicts than other women. Like they bottle up their emotions more and explode only when confronted about something. Also they tend to play psychological games in order to minimize or hide these conflicts. It also seems like they have an extreme need for attention (and often seek out compliments), but often become cold/distant when attention is given to them. Low self-esteem is present a lot.
Interestingly, these women (again the ones I have known personally) also tend to be more likely to have been in abusive or otherwise unhealthy relationships (and more often than not stay in those relationships) which would expectedly bring forth or influence the above negative traits.
I recently had my heart broken by a really cute pale brunette (not the first time by this type) for confusing and unjustified reasons, so I've been thinking about this concept a lot. I've also had my heart broken by women that did not have this look, and those relationships in general were more communicative, less mind-games, and more clear about the reasons it did not work.
Though my heart was broken, this isn't meant to be hostile, but is a genuine inquiry I've been having. Has anyone else noticed a trend of these negative, contradictory, and/or confusing tendencies in light-skinned brunette women compared to the rest of the female population? Any theories as to why?
My initial theory would primarily be social factors. In general, when people think of these women in a social context, they are usually not judged positively. They are more likely to be considered 'outcasts' or loners, and become ostracized and/or teased in school or other social groups. This is probably correlated with the fact that counter-culture-like subgroups such as 'Emo' and 'Goth' cliques are made up of them almost exclusively (not sure which factor is the 'chicken' or 'egg' though) . Not to mention the fact that the modeling industry and popular culture (in the USA at least) are obsessed with blonde women, tan women, and blonde + tan women, and largely ignore light-skinned brunettes. I guess that may add an exotic element to and contributes toward my preference.
Aside from the fact that this look is rare and hard to find, I just feel so unlucky that I am so obsessed with this look in women (which began as a teen way before I became involved in any relationships so it wasn't obv caused by anything); to the point that I would not be interested much in even a good-looking brunette whose skin is a little bit too tan (lol, I know I'm a little neurotic myself, not denying that). And not to mention, completely blonde women with golden beach tans are out of the question. Though I wouldn't automatically turn down a blonde or brown-haired girl if their skin is light enough, so I guess skin color is slightly more of a factor than hair color. I wish I would run into my preferred type and she would turn out to be reasonably functional and not so psychologically damaged. My personal experience with them is sufficient enough to be making these generalizations as a subject of inquiry at the very least.
Anyway, I'll leave it at that for now and would be interested to hear any similar or opposing observations, and supporting theories, etc.
Anyway, I've noticed (from my personal experience) that these women all tend to have similar personality traits such as extreme shyness and passiveness. I realize women inherently tend to be more passive than men, but this type of woman seems to be even more passive than other types of women. Fortunately I happen to find shyness a bit attractive as well.
Unfortunately, I've noticed a lot of negative traits. It seems like they are always psychologically 'damaged' in some way. Some examples: they have much less ability to communicate internal conflicts than other women. Like they bottle up their emotions more and explode only when confronted about something. Also they tend to play psychological games in order to minimize or hide these conflicts. It also seems like they have an extreme need for attention (and often seek out compliments), but often become cold/distant when attention is given to them. Low self-esteem is present a lot.
Interestingly, these women (again the ones I have known personally) also tend to be more likely to have been in abusive or otherwise unhealthy relationships (and more often than not stay in those relationships) which would expectedly bring forth or influence the above negative traits.
I recently had my heart broken by a really cute pale brunette (not the first time by this type) for confusing and unjustified reasons, so I've been thinking about this concept a lot. I've also had my heart broken by women that did not have this look, and those relationships in general were more communicative, less mind-games, and more clear about the reasons it did not work.
Though my heart was broken, this isn't meant to be hostile, but is a genuine inquiry I've been having. Has anyone else noticed a trend of these negative, contradictory, and/or confusing tendencies in light-skinned brunette women compared to the rest of the female population? Any theories as to why?
My initial theory would primarily be social factors. In general, when people think of these women in a social context, they are usually not judged positively. They are more likely to be considered 'outcasts' or loners, and become ostracized and/or teased in school or other social groups. This is probably correlated with the fact that counter-culture-like subgroups such as 'Emo' and 'Goth' cliques are made up of them almost exclusively (not sure which factor is the 'chicken' or 'egg' though) . Not to mention the fact that the modeling industry and popular culture (in the USA at least) are obsessed with blonde women, tan women, and blonde + tan women, and largely ignore light-skinned brunettes. I guess that may add an exotic element to and contributes toward my preference.
Aside from the fact that this look is rare and hard to find, I just feel so unlucky that I am so obsessed with this look in women (which began as a teen way before I became involved in any relationships so it wasn't obv caused by anything); to the point that I would not be interested much in even a good-looking brunette whose skin is a little bit too tan (lol, I know I'm a little neurotic myself, not denying that). And not to mention, completely blonde women with golden beach tans are out of the question. Though I wouldn't automatically turn down a blonde or brown-haired girl if their skin is light enough, so I guess skin color is slightly more of a factor than hair color. I wish I would run into my preferred type and she would turn out to be reasonably functional and not so psychologically damaged. My personal experience with them is sufficient enough to be making these generalizations as a subject of inquiry at the very least.
Anyway, I'll leave it at that for now and would be interested to hear any similar or opposing observations, and supporting theories, etc.
