Stimulants Why does Adderal/Dexedrine have to be so damn good? :(

[foliocb]

A brief drug history for me:

Since this March I convinced my doctor to let me try Adderal 20mg IR tablets. Since then I have taken them 2-3 times a week, and the first 3 months were flipping awesome, GREAT euphoria every time I took it, and found a new and profound feeling of motivation to do things I have been procrastinating on for way too long- school was a breeze... even math which has always been my bane. I started cleaning up my yard and house ten-fold... I felt 'better, faster, stronger' for just about everything...

I can only wonder what High school would have been like if I had discovered this drug back then.

As much as I hate to say it, I have never felt so streamlined in my life as I do when i'm on Adderal, it just seems like I can perfectly compartmentalize my thoughts/goals/dreams/actions and plan them out perfectly and somehow conjure up the motivation to execute them perfectly. And to top it off, I love running now thanks to Adderal, I am running 5 miles every other day now and am getting in really good shape now and I never get hunger pangs/binges when i'm on it ever. My social skills are heightened when i'm on it as well, I feel a lot more empathy when i'm around people and can talk up a storm forever and my words always flow much more eloquently and sometimes when I talk in the back of my head i'm wondering how i'm able to spit out such words/sentences so intuitively.

Now, before I go and call this a miracle drug, one must learn that what goes up, must come down. I dont know much about chemistry or how these drugs work exactly at a biological/pharmacological level, but I have a basic understanding. Basically, it depletes your Dopamine/Nore, and they must be 'recharged' otherwise you're in a downward spiral of shit and will most likely get addicted/dependent on the drug for just basic dopaminergenic functioning.

I definitely wouldn't consider me addicted, but maybe borderline dependent. I still only take 20mg 2-3x a week, and although the euphoria has diminished drastically when i'm on it, I still feel a decent sense of the streamline effect I mentioned earlier. It's the days that I don't take it that I am starting to worry about.

the days immediately following my dose days, I feel like a zombie and overall just lazier, lack of motivation and no real desire to do much except relax and just chill, but usually can't because I work full time. I seemed to have lost a lot of the motivational feeling when i'm on Adderal now too. What goes up must come down

I'm not a total fiend on my dose days, I start my day off with a fruit smoothie with some protein powder in it, and for dinner always a large, healthy salad usually with salmon, and on a daily basis I take:

2g Vitamin C
600mg Magnesium
1g Cucermin
B vitamins
CoQ10
1g Niacin
Spirulina powder

I consider myself pretty self conscious of my health and what I eat, I havent eaten fast food or drank soda for over 2 years, recently stopped caffeine altogether as I realized it was a stimulant as well and was SEIROUSLY fucking with my dopamine levels since I would always drink it when on Adderal as well, I have a slight suspicion that it was the culprit of the great euphoria feeling I got on Adderal because once I stopped drinking caffeine I no longer got the euphoria from Adderal anymore.

Im not too sure why i'm writing this, hopefully it will help some people thinking about taking this drug or maybe people in the same boat as me will know that they are not alone. All I can say is, what goes up, will come down eventually. Now I am thinking of taking a long break from all drugs, but I am worried that I will fall back into my usual, chronic low-grade depression and lack of motivation/goal pursuit that I seemed to have had on a daily basis for the past decade, or should I remain on these drugs and have 3 very productive days, with 3 very unproductive days, and 1 'meh' day?

I really wish I could just feel the streamlined effect and motivated without these drugs, and I really want to... I don't want to self loathe but this has always been my problem in life... maybe i'm just lacking something within? Maybe i'm due for a profound mushroom trip to turn everything around... but damn... adderal/dex... I will never forget.

p.s. I am not on adderal atm, I just write too much to begin with.

 

[TheEazyB]

I'm in the exact same situation as you. I was given a Vyvanse by my friend during my last year in high school and it was the best I ever felt (not just the euphoria, but the motivation) and i started doing better in school (C's and B's as apposed to E's, D's, and C's) (I skipped/came to school high alot) and requested my psych. to put me on the vyvanse. I eventually let the euphoria grab ahold of me and was up to 160mg/day. The med quit motivating me as much when i was taking it for the high. I ended up dropping out of school because i always skipped and a couple months ago requested to be switched to Desoxyn because the vyvanse stopped working and she didn't have a problem.

 

[squishy~fuzz]

I am on that boat with you. I got used to adderal really quickly & noticed early that I need days off for it to still work. I've had a busy summer though, so not many breaks. When I do take breaks, it's not like an opiate withdrawal (hell), it's just the blah-est feeling... like a "rug on valium" =p
I do take a large dose though, 30mg in the morning & 10mg at noon... usually more because of my tolerance.
I also understand your depression & lack of motivation. I usually don't wanna do anything at all, but adderal helps me socialize & helps me have the energy of a normal, healthy person, which I've never had in my life.
Wow, that kinda sounds like an adderal ad.

Basically, I feel your pain! Motivation is hard to find.
Take care & stuff!
~hugs~

 

[NeighborhoodThreat]

OP, what you're experiencing is pretty common when it comes to amphetamines (Adderall, Dexedrine, Vyvanse, etc). Tolerance grows extremely fast. The higher the doses are that you're using, the quicker tolerance will go up.

That's just the name of the game. Magnesium and other supplements will help reduce the speed at which tolerance develops, but they're not a miracle cure for it.

 

[Oxide]

Yep. That's just how it works. The more you like a drug, the more it taxes you. There are ways to dodge it for a while, reducing frequency of use, dosage, etc, but none of it will last forever.

It always turns out the same way; nothing like it used to be.

 

[sekio]

I'm closing this because this is a common effect and you seem to have been set straight. There also seems to be no question to answer.

There are no miracle drugs. For every up, there is a down.