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Broken74

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 1, 2016
Messages
183
Location
Florida, US
I've been through alot, I'm a survivor of many things. Often trying to offer advice to others in familiar places I've been. Funny how that works when you are on the outside looking in. Why is it so different when you find yourself on a path you have spent your whole life avoiding, knowing it will take you into a treacherous forest that wants to eat you alive? What happens when suddenly what you've steered clear of, is sleeping in the bed next to you in the form of a lover ? The answers, I'm certain, are all the same...yet it's not so easy on this side of it. You are just trying to get through that forest and into the clearing, to resemble some what of normalcy in life again.

This is me, after my bf informing me of a newfound addiction to main lining heroin. I'm in unchartered waters here, who do you turn to when you don't want to tarnish his image? This is a lonely place and I understand it isn't all about me, but I'm confused, scared and lost. I'm sure he is too. Even though he says I can talk to him about it, I find it difficult when he's the reason I'm in this forest with all these scary things. And is even more difficult when I try and talk to him but he protects his newfound love through the webs of deceit at any cost.

So here I am dredging along this path, hoping to see the rays of sunlight at the edge of the forest. But this forest is dense, these trees are massive....and the darkness is overwhelming. Maybe there is no edge to this forest.

So many questions, so much hurt, so many unbelievable situations. I swear you couldn't make this shit up. So welcome to the latest chapter in my life, I need an outlet.
 
We're all still reading B74 even if you do not get consistent or continuous responses - you have an outlet for the present, whether or not this will ultimately be supportive to you guys only time will tell. Just continue to keep diarising as you have been doing with regards to acute or long term thoughts, feelings or situations that you are faced with, as the bigger the picture we keep getting will just widen potential areas for input and advice xxx
 
Thx Stee, such a roller coaster. You think things are improving but it's just a carrot dangling in my face. Too many emotions to sort through.
 
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