What some people (including girls) cannot grasp albeit it makes perfect sense...

[laVoix]

Once it happened that I met a girl at a party, she was bellow average as looks are concerned, in the beginning played a little hard to get but after a few drinks was open to kissing, makeouts and pretty much everything.
She complained that during dancing and kissing I was having my eyes open and looking around and I said "yes, since the men are visual creatures". She then said "Oh, I see, but it's so sad, since if you open your eyes the magic is gone..."
I wanted to follow up with, "Yes it's gone cuz I can see your less-then-perfect face", but she was speaking in such a cute and honest way so I decided to avoid a harsh remark and just smiled.

I mean, all the girls dream about being swept off their feet and having a prince charming fall in ecstasy for them, but does the majority of women here sometime take a trip to the mirror and give a honest deep look lol?
The message is clear and I like to compare it to a car analogy: Currently I don't have money to buy a Mercedes SUV, so I have to drive in an old Ford. Does it mean that because I can't afford the SUV I need ditch the Ford and go around by foot?? Hell no. I'll be driving a Ford, trying to improve myself and earn for a Mercedes and if it doesn't happen well at least I had been driving something, always looking for a better deal, but still trying to also live the life in this moment given the current opportunities.
So inherently I don't find anything wrong with the drive and ditch approach even when women are concerned, since I simply refuse to sit depressed at home crying why I can't get supermodels (hell I'm not even in a social circle where those hang out and don't have a clue who gets access to those circles and how), better deal is to even go with bellow average and complain on the way why they're ugly haha

This creates some problems sometime, since if I'm bored I'd tend to invite even an ugly girl to hang out with, but then later in the evening I'd try to pick up better girls in a party if better opportunities are present, making the girl I already know uncomfortable and confused. But the logic is pretty simple, simply wonder how people don't get it.
Albeit wonderful, it might be also flawed, so if you disagree with my way of thinking let me know why?

 

[Beachcat]

I can see absolutely your point of view, but I think that this is a ridiculously shallow approach to finding a partner.

If you are not trying to find a relationship, just fuck, I guess it is ok, but damn it seems you should be honest about that and say, " I am not looking for a relationship, I just want to have fun." so that the girls are not expecting more.

A true, mature and fulfilling relationship goes way deeper than physical appearance. I mean, to use your analogy, what if you find that you truly love the Ford, it is reliable and comfortable. It never lets you down, etc. would you still drop it for the Mercedes?

If the answer is yes, then I would say that you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of unsatisfying relationships.

Just my opinion, of course. Looks matter of course, but they are certainly not everything.

 

[motherofearth]

I disagree because you sound like a superficial asshat.

 

[LilbabiC]

It is true that men are visual creatures but, that visual should start in your own backyard. Maybe, you can't get a Mercedes because you are the Ford. I know many men who are critical of the way their wives/girlfriends look. They tell these women they need to lose a few pounds or do something different with their hair, makeup or whatever. The truly funny part is that men always seem to think they can do better but, they haven't got anything to do better with. The reason that so called "less than average looking" girl is with you is because you can't do better so, stop pretending.

 

[Pagey]

^Kinda agree with that. Ever wonder why you only drive Fords? What's the one common element in all that?
Speaking of which, hadn't you made this car analogy in another thread of yours? I'm sure I've heard it here before, and if my memory's correct you'd already been told you need to stop objectifying women like that...

Your choice if you'd rather get with women you don't find stunning rather than staying alone, but shit, at least respect them yeah? It's sad that you see yourself as so superior to them based on their looks alone, when again, if you're having to 'settle' for anyone it's probably that your looks aren't what you think they are in the first place. I'm not trying to have a dig at you, but your post comes off as pretty ridiculously arrogant. At least have some respect for those women.

 

[tamarinds]

Makes me feel good lilbabi. All my hoes are fine as fuck.


Pretty simple concept

 

[llama112]

I can see absolutely your point of view, but I think that this is a ridiculously shallow approach to finding a partner.

If you are not trying to find a relationship, just fuck, I guess it is ok, but damn it seems you should be honest about that and say, " I am not looking for a relationship, I just want to have fun." so that the girls are not expecting more.

A true, mature and fulfilling relationship goes way deeper than physical appearance. I mean, to use your analogy, what if you find that you truly love the Ford, it is reliable and comfortable. It never lets you down, etc. would you still drop it for the Mercedes?

If the answer is yes, then I would say that you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of unsatisfying relationships.

Just my opinion, of course. Looks matter of course, but they are certainly not everything.

Exactly what I was thinking!
And I'm unsure if the comparison is even relevant. I mean, people are more complex than cars.

If you don't like the girl you're hanging out with, leave her (break up with her if you're dating or just move on if it's at a club/party/something). Don't just keep her around until you find someone better. You either like someone or not. If you think you could "do better", then don't be with that girl! The only (kind of) exception is if it's a one night stand/hookup and you're both on the same page.

Your post did come off as being quite superficial though.

 

[RedLeader]

Last time I got stopped for DUI, I told the cop that I was just trying to make my Ford feel more like a Mercedes.

How did she know your eyes were open unless her eye were also open?

 

[34-dihydroxyphen]

I think I follow what the OP is saying.


So hopefully my rebuttal to what I believe he is saying is appropriate.


I have only known two dudes who were basically able to get beautiful women on demand, and both of them are quite obese. I know a lot of other dudes who talk a lot of shit about hooking up with women, but they are full of the same shit they are talking. The two dudes I know for whom luck in that department has been visually confirmed on multiple occasions are probably two of the least physically attractive I know (although the way they carry themselves and good hygiene and shit makes me reluctant to call them the least attractive, but in terms of genetics both are far from gifted).

Looks don't really define the dating world. Charisma does. Especially for men, but it applies to women a lot more than most men would acknowledge and women are aware of.

So basically, the car analogy is bullshit. If I am following you correctly.

 

[FromHereToEternity]

It makes perfect sense if you see these girls as objects that you can just drop and grab a better version of when you happen to able to afford to. You are shallow as hell and thats undeniable. What if you were in love with some girl and she was blunt with you and said yea i found someone better looking than you so walk it off. I hope it would make perfect sense in your head than and you would commend her on the attitude.

 

[bagochina]

And I'm unsure if the comparison is even relevant. I mean, people are more complex than cars

Are you sure? Have you seen some of the on-board computer systems in cars lately? Definitely makes me wonder about some girls.

 

[wizekrak]

Honestly I've never been able to operate that way. I don't believe in leading people on if I know I'm unsatisfied with the position I'm in. I would much rather 'walk' than drive something I had no attachment to. Then again I've never been good at keeping sex and attachment separate. The way I look at it is that if I were involved with someone who I knew wasn't doing it for me then I'd know I'm wasting both my time and their time. My time is far too precious to waste on something that isn't fulfilling my needs (I need more than just a socket for my rocket). I'm also a very visual guy, and being so visual I really couldn't bring myself to have sex with someone I didn't find myself very attracted to. I'm lucked out though and found a girl who is fun to hang out with, a knockout, and crazy in the sack. But it took a long time to find the right one.

I suppose if you're constantly open to new opportunities then you aren't really shortchanging yourself since you can just jump horses mid stream. But unless the girl knows its strictly non committal then its unfair to her. I can see where you're coming from with the car analogy, its the ago old process of trading up. But the thing is that human beings aren't objects. If you crush a car in to a cube its no big deal, but if you crush a girl's heart there's hell to pay.

 

[Mel22]

This creates some problems sometime, since if I'm bored I'd tend to invite even an ugly girl to hang out with, but then later in the evening I'd try to pick up better girls in a party if better opportunities are present, making the girl I already know uncomfortable and confused.

Disgusting behaviour IMO.

Stop being an arsehole. You can play the field and still treat people with respect...grow up.

 

[laVoix]

Exactly what I was thinking!
And I'm unsure if the comparison is even relevant. I mean, people are more complex than cars.

Don't just keep her around until you find someone better. You either like someone or not. If you think you could "do better", then don't be with that girl! The only (kind of) exception is if it's a one night stand/hookup and you're both on the same page.

Your post did come off as being quite superficial though.

That's precisely the issue. What you suggest is to drop my own selfish interests for some girl's (apparent )benefit. Apparent since if they're around, there must be something in for them also and in fact I always try to give them the best "rewards" for just being there around me.
However if I did what you suggest I'd drop everyone I know since they don't really reassemble supermodels but average people and I'd even drop all male friends also since I already know them more or less, I absorbed their know-how, "competences" and their interests so their way of life is becoming increasingly boring for me (like these freaking neighbors smoking pot all night and playing Texas Hold'em, it gets old after a while). I'm ready for something bigger, some new experiences.

But then hell it's not easy to constantly have new people coming in the funnel and as my tastes become increasingly refined about what I want and what is my ideal mate or "friend" the more difficult is to find what I want albeit I found myself recently working full time on 'scouting'.

BUT for practical reasons I cannot drop all the female acquaintances, since I even wouldn't be able to get in some clubs due to stupid formalities etc. Or there is an odd I-feel-alone afternoon where I just call everyone in order until someone agrees to come and hang out, even if it's the most unappealing girl who expects me to foot a bill for a pretty nice dinner since she believes in "traditional" m/f courtesy I go along since simply in that moment I don't like the idea of sitting alone at home.

I also DISAGREE that it's "like someone or not", it's more like the scale from 1 to 1000, with 1 being absolute dislike and 1000 absolute like and many many states in between. I mean it's always possible to rate something, though I don't yet have a perfect methodology to be really sure the ratings are fair and consistent all the time...

 

[laVoix]

Last time I got stopped for DUI, I told the cop that I was just trying to make my Ford feel more like a Mercedes.

How did she know your eyes were open unless her eye were also open?

Ditto lol

 

[laVoix]

What if you were in love with some girl and she was blunt with you and said yea i found someone better looking than you so walk it off. I hope it would make perfect sense in your head than and you would commend her on the attitude.

Not that it wouldn't be expected, it actually happens daily around the globe...
Some guys deal with that fear through excessive JEALOSY and that is pretty much self-explanatory, I prefer the "try to stay ahead of the game" method and attempt to build or at least project superior overall quality when confronted with a threat that there might be some competition...If no competition, guess what, it's time to sleep, enjoy the victory and do nothing at all, cuz there is no fucking need to!! It works both ways, hell you even hear it in daily economics news lol

And not that enjoying victory and doing nothing is bad either. I spent wonderfull 1-2 years just in that tune, hell I didn't even have to go to gym since you know darlin' now we're spending a lot of time together so I don't really have time...a perfect excuse. Reduce work to a minimum, take on some debt and the life is GOOD, the effects tend to lag so it gives you (and your partner) the feeling of a stunning lifestyle NOW...Trip after trip and sipping cocktails the whole day...Not doing a shit...All the flirting abilities and banter gone and forgotten since hell who needs those if we're cuddling all the time...Fuck the boring dance classes and complicated moves, the monkey sex traditional way never fails...Throw charisma and sense of diplomacy out the window, since hell we know each other so good now and beside all the other couples argue so what.

AND THEN after sometime, there is that bug of curiosity again and "the grass is greener elsewhere" syndrome kicks in. It's like your vision have changed and you see only flaws and imperfections in everything in your life, including your partner. And the harsh truth is that those are real, quantifiable flaws, you can point them and everyone sees. They were present there all the time, but hell man needs to let go and enjoy the moment once in a while...............

 

[Pagey]

However if I did what you suggest I'd drop everyone I know since they don't really reassemble supermodels but average people and I'd even drop all male friends also since I already know them more or less, I absorbed their know-how, "competences" and their interests so their way of life is becoming increasingly boring for me (like these freaking neighbors smoking pot all night and playing Texas Hold'em, it gets old after a while). I'm ready for something bigger, some new experiences.

So basically you're a massive hypocrite who pretends to give a damn about people when in your head and behind their back you take great pleasure in belittling them because they aren't attractive enough?
You're like the CEO of Abercrombie & Fitch (just in case you don't get the comparison, he's ugly as fuck).

At least man up, own up to your emotions and stop lying to your 'friends'. If you don't actually enjoy being around them stop wasting their time.

 

[llama112]

Are you sure? Have you seen some of the on-board computer systems in cars lately? Definitely makes me wonder about some girls.

Yes. People have feelings. That is something you can't recreate in a machine.

That's precisely the issue. What you suggest is to drop my own selfish interests for some girl's (apparent )benefit. Apparent since if they're around, there must be something in for them also and in fact I always try to give them the best "rewards" for just being there around me.
However if I did what you suggest I'd drop everyone I know since they don't really reassemble supermodels but average people and I'd even drop all male friends also since I already know them more or less, I absorbed their know-how, "competences" and their interests so their way of life is becoming increasingly boring for me (like these freaking neighbors smoking pot all night and playing Texas Hold'em, it gets old after a while). I'm ready for something bigger, some new experiences.

But then hell it's not easy to constantly have new people coming in the funnel and as my tastes become increasingly refined about what I want and what is my ideal mate or "friend" the more difficult is to find what I want albeit I found myself recently working full time on 'scouting'.

BUT for practical reasons I cannot drop all the female acquaintances, since I even wouldn't be able to get in some clubs due to stupid formalities etc. Or there is an odd I-feel-alone afternoon where I just call everyone in order until someone agrees to come and hang out, even if it's the most unappealing girl who expects me to foot a bill for a pretty nice dinner since she believes in "traditional" m/f courtesy I go along since simply in that moment I don't like the idea of sitting alone at home.

I also DISAGREE that it's "like someone or not", it's more like the scale from 1 to 1000, with 1 being absolute dislike and 1000 absolute like and many many states in between. I mean it's always possible to rate something, though I don't yet have a perfect methodology to be really sure the ratings are fair and consistent all the time...

Well, I know if I like someone or not. I don't just "settle" for guys. I don't think anyone should just "settle" for someone. I'm not suggesting you drop your own selfish interest for a girl. I'm saying, don't start seeing a girl that you don't really like, if you don't think she's good enough.

For the record, many people are not into superficial guys. So you're basically looking for a superficial girl who is beautiful? But probably doesn't have much of a personality?

 

[double ewe]

do you think, in her eyes, you're also a Ford?

 

[rm-rf]

lol this was like reading Joseph Goebbels' anonymous tumblr blog rant

do you think, in her eyes, you're also a Ford?

Do you (OP) think in her eyes, youre a child trapped inside a man's body? Do you think youre not the 40,000th let-down in a row, and that youre not just killing women's faith left and right that someday a man will be available whose mind and soul matured along with his body, not left dragging decades behind?

Do you think there is no more to having a partner than the residual self image they reflect back to you?