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What kind of "tweaker" are you?

Z

Zopharr

Greenlighter
Joined
Sep 27, 2008
Messages
25
I've been using stims for a long time now(addy prescription for about 4 years and crystal for the past three, albeit on and off).

In dealing with the hard stuff, I've come to meet a lot of unique people over the years, many who I've become good friends with... but if there's one thing I've not been able to find, it's a "tweaker" quite like myself.

When I speed, I literally do one and only one thing: Play video games. Obsessively.

I've had ADHD my entire life-- finally prescribed at around age 19 (I'm about to turn 27). As a kid, I was socially defective to say the least, and spent most of my life playing video games... but by the time I graduated high school and went to college, I'd just lost my ability to stay focused on playing long enough to enjoy them like I used to. Growing up or something, maybe, but I do hate the fact that I just have trouble holding my interest to gaming anymore... which is the sole reason I have been taking stims ever since that first magical experience.

30 hours... 40 hours.... 50 hours at times... no rest other than to urinate or to perform necessary tasks like working (when I couldnt find an excuse to call off) or other annoying garbage. If I'm speeding, all I want to be doing is gaming. I mean I've literally convinced my girlfriends to try speed and game with me just so that I wouldn't have to be bothered to do anything else while still technically "hanging out."

Now, obviously, this is not a very fulfilling way to live... which is why I'm forced to limit my binges to once every few weeks, with a few multi-month breaks thrown in here or there when it becomes a problem (which it always does at some point).

I've lost girls, jobs, and even a home because of my ridiculous neglect for the world when I'm speeding. It's funny because in any given month I'd say I use on average maybe 3 days out of it in total, but in those 3 days I can and WILL find a way to mess something up. Thankfully I spend the other 27 days a month living a normal life, so I do have a job, a home, and a family (no kids... if I did, I'd never use again.).... but still.

All of it just to have an occasional bender of non-stop game playing.

After every single bender I think to myself... "Why the f*** do I do this?" ... and yet I'm sure I will continue to have my "weekend" once a month for the forseeable future, despite any consequences they may bring.


So, share your story: What kind of tweaker are you? What do YOU do it for?


(Side note: as you can probably tell, this post was made during that not-so-wonderful limbo period between "Well, that was fun, time for bed." and "God DAMN it why can't I just SLEEP already?!")
 
The kind of tweaker who simply tweaks compulsively.
It's not at all uncommon of me to binge for 3 days, get one night's sleep, then go for 5 days straight, or for said use to begin at 2pm Wednesday and work/study as normal.
I'm actually on Day 6 as I type this...
 
I have over 5000 hours played on Counterstrike Source which is over 200 days.. I've never done methamp but would take all the Rx amps and game on for days. I would crush noobs and was banned for 'hacking/cheating' many times. My record was 106 kills, 0 deaths.
 
I like to masturbate, straight up, beat my meat for hours. And the climaxs,woah!! Talk about spray the shower curtains with such force.
 
Anytime I ever got spun out I was doing it with downers (heroin, oxy, ativan, klonopin, valium, fioricet, fentanyl - sometimes all of these, usually at least two).
Due to a SB I probably would behave differently than people who are just on meth.

I don't use meth anymore, but when I did I didn't act all that different than if I wasn't on it.
I could sit still.. I probably talked a bit more than if I wasn't spun out.


Speed is such a weird drug... ugh. The Shadow People.
 
I do it cuz I'm a drug addict but I like the high, but after being awake for 48 hours and up I become the stereotypical tweaker paranoid as'f and irrational thoughts.
 
D's said:
I like to masturbate, straight up, beat my meat for hours. And the climaxs,woah!! Talk about spray the shower curtains with such force.
Click to expand...
First climaximum on amps feels like IV caine for me..
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Kinda tweaker who goes hard on AdderRAW for 3-4 days.. Then is outta thy script. Fuck it. Them IR's get me RIPE.
BTW; Sprout goes harder than most.. Fucking OG in the game..
 
I usually have a decent IV shot, rush i.e pace back and forth, sit down unable to do much or just repeat the words "fuck" over and over.

Then if im with mates we'll chat pretty much constantly for a few hours. They will usually have alcohol(I rarely drink) and we'll all be smoking cones(Aussie slang for the bowl in a bong). It eventually gets to the point where everyone is talking at once and everyone is so cooked that we'll either have a nice peaceful night or something will get said or done and someone will flip out. I rarely use wit mates though unless im being shouted freebies by them.

If im doing what my plan for tonight it, then this is how it goes.....

Ill get however much crystal(in tonight's case 1/2g), have a nice maybe 0.1g shot and load the pipe up with 50mg or so. Then that's my rations until im ready to go. Ill make myself look nice, smell nice, get everything together that I need and then be on my way to Sydney on the train as soon as I can be.

By now I will have chosen which venue im going to and whether its purely sex or if I want to go clubbing/dancing too. Tonight its sex, im going to a SOPV i.e Sex-On-Premises-Venue which are either wet venues like saunas/bath houses where you cruise the venue with a towel around your waist or just sex clubs where you keep your clothes on until an encounter takes place. So tonight im going to a sauna, I will usually be high before I get there. And spend the night socializing, having fun and having lots of sex! I know many ppl will think that I probably just go fuck bareback etc but even though the sex is basically on tap, there are condoms/lube on every single wall just about, ive been lucky that every HIV+ person ive encountered has disclosed their status to me before anything happens, and theyre really quite safe places compared to going to a random persons home etc. I can understand to most people it might sound a bit seedy but its actually quite safe and a centuries old tradition.

Often the men there are on Crystal(or "Tina" as the gay ppls call it) themselves, GHB & Ketamine as well as Viagra & Cialis are also common(E & cocaine not so much to my knowledge) and Amyl or poppers can be bought there.

So ill enjoy myself til the trains start running again which is around 5-6am, where ill find a nice seat on the train, do my travels, pick up my methadone on the way home then enjoy smoking pot & some benzos when I get home :-) That's me
 
Just flick that shit like a cigarette butt that u picked up off the ground to smoke x.

Forreal tho, i used to be the type tweaker that could actually sit down and enjoy smoking a bowl with some members of my family , and color fuzzy posters and play video games .

Now it has turned into me cleaning,loading,&smoking a bowl, while the ( cold) water from the shower is going,and after getting high,I actually take the shower ,and when I get out I don't want my roomate to hear my torch or lighter and already been n the bathroom over 45mins-hour, hell by the time i get done in there i wanna go back in there and take another shower. Lmao
 
When I'm on amphetamines generally I'll spend an entire day just making music & smoking small bowls of green on a very frequent basis (probly masturbate a few times throughout the day as well)...even when I'm tweaking really hard it really helps me focus like nothing else. Helps me be more patient with the music I'm making as well.
 
Id consider myself a professional tweaker.. haha but it depends on what im around cause if I find myself in guitar center .. its on ill lose myself in synths guitars and different pedals adjusting amps.. and I totally feel you on the bathroom.. its like my safe haven.. end up running the water and getting sidetracked on another project that I might as well start then by the time I go to get in shits cold as hell so I turn it off and get on my computer till its ready for round two.. ive caught myself in my girls bathroom for 4 hours one time.. Makes me laugh now but at the time I had some explaining to do.. I mean really what the fuck was I doing in there for 4 hours lol
 
I'm the kind of tweaker to get shit done I guess take about 45mg of ampthetamine to start out pop 30mg every hour or so and do things one time I cleaned the whole hous swept mopped etc then I took my computer apart cleaned it all until it was dust free and put it all together in about 30 min
 
I used to be like OP, BF3 on methamp was what made life worth living. BF3 and porn. but mostly BF3. Now I use stims for personal growth. And porn.
 
I'm the same as you OP. I'll smoke a bowl every thirty or so minutes and game for days. That or go dancing on Friday and Saturday and crash on Sunday.

I find that as long as you keep up with eating, keeping yourself clean, and taking melatonin and sleeping for around 14 hours, you can do this without a lot of ramifications.

The problems arise for me when I do it with other tweakers, as they don't want to stop to eat proper meals, clean themselves, and just end up doing stupid stuff.

So I tweak alone now. Or I tweak then go out with non-tweakers to socialize.
 
I'll try to be productive, but man, once I watch porno, it's fucking done. I hate sexual activity on meth. It feels great and all, but it's suck a time waster. ESPECIALLY MASTURBATION
 
Oh god. I shoot meth and it's the most insidious addiction I've ever had, to the point where if I'm forced to choose I prefer it over IV heroin and that's saying something.

I start off with a nice point shot and keep redosing smaller amounts every few hours (doesn't help that I have a needle fixation too); the meth is in my purse wherever I go.

I write a list of things I want to accomplish and then spend the whole time chatting on Facebook and snapping nudes/sending provocative texts for my long-distance fuck buddy. If I'm lucky I can tear myself away from all that and clean my house or do art (I'm a hobby photographer and I once spent six hours in the same room shooting the same four frames at slightly different exposures/f-stops/angles until the security guards got extremely amused and told me the building was closing.

I try to sleep every night cause The Shadow People happen if I don't and that triggers my bipolar mania which is Very Bad.

And then I run out and fall into full-on depression from my poor depleted neurotransmitters and all I can do is fiennnnd until I can scrounge up the cash to buy more. I'm at the stage of returning every unopened things in the house but not yet at the point of stealing. Still not a good path to be following.

I wish to god I'd never tried it. If you're considering, the highs aren't worth the lows. And yet your addict lizard brain compels you to do it again and again and again and again
 
I take stimulants, normally for 2 days at a time, a mini binge if you will.

I get obsessive about writing in forums such as bluelight. I spend hours typing posts and making sure everything is grammatically correct.

I used to masturbate for 8+ hours but now I've become literally obsessed with writing and researching to within an inch of my sanity. Just can't get enough.
 
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