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What is your group of friends like?

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washingtonbound

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
572
Location
FL
I have been curious about the role drug use plays in social dyanamics beyond the surface. Often times people arbitrarily label people as "stoners," "tweakers," etc, when in reality many recreational drug users are complex people that should not be swept under the umbrella with one simple stereotype. This is why I am curious to hear from you bluelighters how you percieve yourselves in your particular environment.

I have never been a very boisterous party type, but I would deeply value the opportunity to enjoy intimate evenings with a few close friends enjoying psychedelics. I consider myself to be more introverted, but not particularly eccentric. I have a relaxed demeneaor and have never been a fan of trends, and as a result have not felt very engaged with my peers as of yet.

Anyway, I am curious to hear about the dynamics of your friend group(s) and how you see yourselves fitting into your environment. Do you feel alienated? Or are you part of the bandwagon at your school, workplace, etc? Please provide basic information like age, gender, and location. Thanks for reading.
 
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I am smart, shy around those I don't know, not good at making friends or maintaining relationships IRL. I feel very alienated. I can easily make up small talk/bullshit at work, but past that superficial group, I am totally alone. I usually feel like if someone hasn't done a lot of drugs or drank way too much, then I can't relate to them like I can with people on BL. People just bore me & I love getting fucked up, so if the two coincide, we're golden.


21/M/NC
 
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Bob Loblaw said:
I am very smart, shy around those I don't know, not good at making friends or maintaining relationships IRL. I feel very alienated. I can easily make up small talk/bullshit at work, but past that superficial group, I am totally alone. I usually feel like if someone hasn't done a lot of drugs or drank way too much, then I can't relate to them like I can with people on BL. People just bore me & I love getting fucked up, so if the two coincide, we're golden.


21/M/NC
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That's me except 22/M/PA. From NC though... I have friends at work that would be shocked if they knew the extent of my drug use. I definitely have trouble relating to people who haven't lived through addiction. I got some real friends in NC and maybe one in this fucking state. I can't wait to get back home.
 
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I can relate w/ what Bob said except for that I'm not particularly smart, I just like to learn and explore.

My group is relatively non-existent. I have one friend who is addicted to spliffs and snobby beers and we chill a lot. He is also the only one of my friends I really do hard drugs with. I have another pot-smoking buddy who I hang with less frequently, and one friend in Europe who smokes and drinks with me whenever he's on this side of the pond.

Wow, 3 whole people... to be frank we are pretty normal, we just love our beer and our weed. The two of my three friends (that make up my substance abuse support group) who don't use hard drugs don't judge me for using them. Which kicks ass, since we couldn't really be friends if they did.

I used to have a tight partnership with two close friends of mine and we would trip frequently together, but those days are over. They both moved across the country and I don't even speak to them anymore :\
 
Friends? What friends?

Back in Alaska I had a lot of "friends." Anchorage is puny so all tweekers and dope fiends know each other, because we dip in both worlds, and its just so small up there. Not after I left did I realize how much more I value being alone than being surrounded by people who are disloyal, waiting for you to pass out so they can rob you, people who slam meth infront of their toddlers, pieces of garbage.

Im 23, female and live in Los Angeles.

I dont get along with "normal" people. Like bob said i feel alienated and can pull off the whole normal person facade but dont feel connected to these people since im a junkie. But i dont like hanging around other users because i noticed thats when my life goes off track. I can remain a functioning addict so long as i keep to myself, or hang out with straight arrow people. But i dont feel that connection with those people, so hanging with them is not really fulfilling or enjoyable, just helps to pass time but then makes me feel lik more of a weirdo.

People always question why ive been single for years, and the truth is i cant handle another junkie bf and a non user cant handle me, despite no one knowing of my addiction unless i reveal it. I dont radiate "junkie" anymore, although i used to. I cleaned up my act quite a bit and am now in this weird purgatory of not a full fledged junkie but not good enough for regular people. Of course i dont tell people this when they ask the bf question, i lie and say im a lesbian or too busy to date.

I want friends like me, but its hard because i just got to the point of being a functioning addict, i got a car and apt back and am enrolled in college again, amazingly. The problem w functioning addicts is were like chameleons i think, but i want to meet more and they are hard to identify, and wont readily admit to others their situation. I never reveal mine.
 
I like how everyone starts explaining themselves & giving their 'life story' when asked what their friend group is like..
Maybe it's just because they don't have any friends..

My friend group is kind of odd. Some are no longer with us, because they're either in jail or they just randomly fucked off.
So here's how it goes in my neighborhood.

Couple A&B - Couple A&B have been going out for months, almost a year. They're grimey as fuck and will pull tricks to get cash quick. I never liked them, and never will.
As far as friendship goes, I only give them rides when they have some extra $$ to throw me. I used to take them to stores & shit so they could steal & re-sell to big chain stores, but not anymore. I'm not taking the risks involved in that.
I haven't seen them in awhile. One is in jail, and the other.. well, I just prefer not to associate with them. Maybe if they throw some cash my way I'll see them again.

B - B is my boy. He's chill, always fucked up, and regularly throws me cash to drive him. He's not grimey & isn't like the rest of these fuckin' junkies. B has gotten me out of being sick time after time.

BE - BE is sort of a 'backup' plan.. if you will. He's not a full junkie, and isn't grimey. We'll just call him a beginner. Well, when I don't have enough gas or cash for the car, we'll hitup BE and he'll drive for us. He's always paranoid when coppin' in the hood, and sometimes I have to drive for him.. BE's an alright guy, for now.. Likes the same music as I do, and isn't one of these 'Gangsta's" stereotypes. BE could be my boy, but I tend not to get attached to people because they're all expendable in my eyes.

I guess that's it. There's other junkies out there, but we don't fuck with them.
 
My good friends have either moved; got into relationship, and moved.

I miss one that moved away so much. I would give anything to just chill with him as he would with me. It is just hard with his GF.


Have another friend who we are really close and we smoke together all the time and do the occasional molly or w/e. I'm not best friends but we are close as. Most likely for life. He has parties at his house and cool drug-users living there with soft drug use (molly, tripping, etc). But as I said, i haven't been doing drugs. And when I did drugs @ his parties I still don't really fit in. But i fit in really well when i'm sober, just not enough to hang with them, like, unannounced though.

I've been sober past 8 moths. Not fully sober -- a few uses and mj smoke. I'm 23, m in NZ. atm I am finding life very hard but I can tell something or myself is getting better. As in - finding new friends or friend group. But still haven't had good success. I just don't find being sober, & around sober people all that gravy.



I can make small-talk and be sociable with strangers (sometimes, mostly not though) but they either loose interest in me, or i do in them very quickly. Though not in a bad way. I find being sober very boring sometimes. I need a release every now and then. But I've decided not to for a bit, I don't know why, but i will come back to drugs one day, they arnt going anywhere.

Yes. I feel alienated around the majority of ppl. But some I'm close with, and whom do drugs and no drugs except alcohol.

I'm going to fly to N America and travel around California. I wonder how I will do?

Hopefully I meet some ppl or a girl that i can connect with.
 
I'm an old man. 38. Most of my friends are my fishing buddies. Some if them like drugs too. Most of my drug connects aren't friends, they are shady mothafuckas. I wouldn't hang with them if not for drugs. That being said, there is a code if honor amongst us. No one ever really gets screwed.

I do keep in contact with a few close friends from high school and college. I just don't get to see em as much as I'd like. Heading to San Diego in a few months to see one of my best buds from HS. That's gonna be a blast. I also have one really good friend that lives in town. We've know each other over twenty five years. Only guy who tries to get an extra five outta me on an eighth of weed. Go figure..,
 
My friends are all musicians or dating musos. The bands will play every weekend (well someone in our group will) and we usually all get on for the night. Luckily I'm the only one with connections so they all come to me!
 
Since you all have chimed in about your experiences, I figured I'd share mine.
I grew up in a retirement community in SW FL, and while it was tolerable as a little kid, I began to go stir crazy as an adolescent when I realized that I would have a hard time making new friends in an area where the median age is 65. The white trash element in surrounding areas did help the situation and therefore I ventured out to Fort Myers for high school. I was dismayed by the domineering redneck element at Fort Myers and realized it was only a meager step up from my home situation. The wild goose chase for a more "fitting" environment set in and I found myself in boarding school in Boca Raton, FL.
This turned out to be yet another mistake as I found myself being picked on by the ostentatious, pompous pricks at this god awful boarding school. I am more of a creative type and it seemed like if you weren't a lacrosse player or very ostentatious you might as well get used to your own company at that place. I had a few acquaintances that I smoked weed with but they were really pretty worthless. The same old party hardy high school mentality bored me very quickly and I just found myself getting stoned because it made dealing with these generic people more tolerable in the short term.
I found myself kicked out of this school before the first semester was over and that's when the shit hit the fan. I found my anxiety spiraling out of control and began to solicit drugs online because I had no connections or friends at home. Thinking back on it, I was being a dramatic, hormonal little shit but I can emphasize with myself a little bit because high school really was a worthless experience.
I spent a year in treatment and have a much clearer head now, which I attribute to meeting some great people during my stint. I still talk to a couple people from there although most of us have gone our separate ways.
I'm making the permanent move to seattle in a few weeks and hope to cultivate some meaningful friendships there, although I am not getting my hopes up. After attending the orientation in June, I felt like I was still in HS. Go figure.
 
What my group friend is like? A bunch of alcoholics lols that's why I don't hang out with them as much.
 
From high school to college, i was in a group of stoners, we didn't drink much, then we met up with a group of kid who drank a lot and smoked less. We all hung out one night, we combined out weed and alcohol forces, and it was also the first time I was able to get benzos in high quality.

It was a great year that I don't remember, the drunk group even came to us and said they couldn't do benzos anymore cuz they would come home and just started breaking shit and punching walls. (benzos aren't for drunks). Then after that my stoner group has mostly stayed in tact. Some in graduate school, one unemployed, one working, another doing lab work. And now it's just me and the one with a job that are into the stuff harder than booze/weed.
 
It's funny how one can go to having a huge group of friends, down to just a few, down to just one.

My last group that I hung out with about a year ago, we would just drink booze and smoke blunts all night every night. Sometimes we'd do cocaine and psychs on the occasion but that was about it. They always scoffed at me whenever I broke out Oxycodone or drugs similar. They were a bunch of hypocrites anyways.

Nowadays I keep to myself. I have only one real buddy for the most part and we do our "drugs" together and keep it pretty secret from everyone else in our lives. Only thing he doesn't know about me is that I loveee me some Meth. He thinks I'm an adderall fanatic :p
 
JunkieDays said:
I like how everyone starts explaining themselves & giving their 'life story' when asked what their friend group is like..
Maybe it's just because they don't have any friends.. .
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Because explaining themselves gives an idea into what their circle is like?

And most posts ended w that same conclusion stated by the poster themselves..
 
my circle of friends is really interesting and diverse. i'm the type that's down for anything, so my friends are the people eating LSD in the woods every weekend, and the people drinking cases of beer at someones house every weekend, and smoking pot non stop playing Mario kart every weekend, to being sober eating dinner with their family every weekend. needless to say, these are all like different groups of people that don't see each other much, but I see all of them.
 
JunkieDays said:
I like how everyone starts explaining themselves & giving their 'life story' when asked what their friend group is like..
Maybe it's just because they don't have any friends..
Click to expand...

With most people, ur current group of friends usually started somewhere in jr. High/high school or college/18+ y/o..... then simmered off to what u have now, with some new friends along the way.

Pretty hard to avoid "life story" shit in there.
 
my two best friends are my girlfriend, who's pretty much the female version of me; social, smart, and hopelessly addicted to drugs, and my friend kyle, who doesn't take too many drugs, but went through cocaine addiction with me 2-3 years ago, and drinks with me a few times a week.
 
DJRolling said:
my circle of friends is really interesting and diverse. i'm the type that's down for anything, so my friends are the people eating LSD in the woods every weekend, and the people drinking cases of beer at someones house every weekend, and smoking pot non stop playing Mario kart every weekend, to being sober eating dinner with their family every weekend. needless to say, these are all like different groups of people that don't see each other much, but I see all of them.
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So, what do you guys do on the weekends?
 
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