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What is the funniest/stupidist thing you have said on drugs?

Noahhatesme

Noahhatesme

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 19, 2022
Messages
405
Location
Wisconsin
Ill start.
(Ps: this is the reason i dont do weed often)

My partner gave me an edibal right before school. Me, trusting the idiot, took it. It was like 6:40 am, i wasnt using my brain, and i didnt think to ask the dosage.

It hit me like a truck in the middle of Bio...

Now fun fact about me, weed makes me tweak tf out sometimes and increases the frequency of my tics. So imediately my teacher knew i was on somthing, but he has never really cared cause i have an A in his class. (Ive liturally come to his class on DXM and he didnt give a shit.) If anything he usually finds it funny.

Now at this point in the class we were talking about the effects of dairy consumption on the body. And he asks "what happens to the lactic acid when we digest it?" Or somthing along those lines.

He goes around the classroom and noone was answering it right, so in a stroke of stupidity i raised my hand. He called on me and i just yelled "MILK" way to fucking loudly with my hand still in the air. THE LOOK THIS MAN GAVE ME 🤣

I swear to god i have never had someone call me a dumbass so effectively without even speaking.
 
I once claimed that I survived getting shot in the head. Did it in front of a bunch of people who obviously knew better. Lots of weed and almost 2 bottles of wine. I was so fkd up that I was remembering something else that did happen, but I described it as getting shot in the head, lol.
 
Told a very pushy Hare Krishna disicple than me and of my group of friends couldn't stop to listen to him because we had to catch a train for about 10 minutes while coming up on mdma, despite there being no train station in the town. I then vomited into a recycling bin Infront of him and told my friends to run, they didn't, and I fell down some steps, while still quite visable to the disciple. I felt absolutely incredible.
 
Saying while being drunk to a girl who literally took hundred's of XTC pill's. She had just taken a pill. But was done partying. We were in her BF's place btw.

Aren't you afraid you are going to die, MDMA is very dangerous. She gave me 'the look', Went to bed cool and calm. While I woke up with a hangover.
 
Years ago when my mattress was on the floor, I'd took quite a few zopiclone after stims at a rave so I could sleep, I still couldn't sleep so tried finding the zopiclone next to my bed, I turn round to my boyfriend at the time and tell him I can't find the floor
He said we're on the floor, but nope feeling around for the floor I couldn't find it in the dark and my phone was also on the floor, couldn't find phone so I couldn't shine it's light around to find more zopiclone, did in the end lol

Ahh the days I could go raving till my fibromyalgia put a stop to that, and as for zopiclone not took that in a very long time that's evil stuff, worse than benzos, I used to love them, they fuck you up in the end once habit gets bad, make you really depressed if you've been on them a while I lost so much weight on them too, and withdrawals are nasty, and I've came off alot ALOT of different pills etc

Another funny thing said to me by my ex mate said she doesn't think she's human while on K as I sat there on just as much K not feeling fuck all, the lightweight lol
 
Swim, really a swim, location one of the most bizar disco's ever build over here. Apparently was talking to a pillar with a round table made around it. Something to put your empty glass on or so. This is in the early 90's, the time of the Doves (one of the earliest pill's).

Obviously out of his mind on MDMA. This was also the period XTC seemed to give the illusion people were wearing sunglasses. And turned even streetlight's into people.

When confronted by one of his mates , who asked what are you doing? he replied:

"I am having a conversation with this beautiful waitress"
 
couldn't tell you but i recall having a very awkks breakfast following my parents catching me kholed out of my gourde.
cant remember what i said or did,? lmao
 
After a night of drinking we smoked weed which I don’t do too often. At 6:30am we got home & Saturday morning cartoons were on. Watching Winnie the Pooh I said “POOH IS SATAN’S MAN” when asked to explain I said only Satan’s man could be that happy😂😂😂😂😂
 
i was at a bonfire kegger in the dunes as a teen and us girls would swagger off and go pee in private, i pulled down my jeans and popped a squat and pee pee`d str8 into my pants unknowingly all funky drunk/stoned and said do you hear that? luanne said hear what? so lets say that i am a pro now
 
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I think the first time I ever smoked bud out of a bong, I was sitting on the couch with my friend. Somehow I got to flipping the light switch on the wall while I did not realize my friend had the remote and was flipping through the TV channels. For a minute there, I thought that my flipping the light switch on and off was what was causing the TV to change channels. Of course I was fascinated by this newly discovered phenomenon until my friend was like, "Hey dickhead, quit turning the lights off and on!!"
 
Jerry Atrick said:
I think the first time I ever smoked bud out of a bong, I was sitting on the couch with my friend. Somehow I got to flipping the light switch on the wall while I did not realize my friend had the remote and was flipping through the TV channels. For a minute there, I thought that my flipping the light switch on and off was what was causing the TV to change channels. Of course I was fascinated by this newly discovered phenomenon until my friend was like, "Hey dickhead, quit turning the lights off and on!!"
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thats soooooooooooo me
 
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