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What is going on in my dads head when..

ben2990

ben2990

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 10, 2010
Messages
512
Location
Dubai
tonight my dad was chatting on the phone vivaciously, with all types of random wild noises going off in the background its hard to decipher what exactly is going on. before heading off to bed he says dont goto bed to late now. ok dad. i said. moments laters after he had walked out of his room (completely naked) to goto the washroom. i hear things flying off his desk hitting the floor then the scratches of his chair movinging fiolently across the floor untill i yell, dad!? and then the most vioelnt of all a crash from his chair streicking the floor with tremendous force. i yell mom! and immediatly all noise ceases |

my dad is afriad of my mom. and when she comes downstairs she asks him what the hell is going on, and he says he was ahving toreuble moving the chair and got frustrated and smashed it on the floor. then she walks into the rom where he had been, and there we find... : ms vickies chips strewn about the place, along side many diet cokes and some jack daniels. it also looked like he had been eating large quantarties of food, but most funny (and equally shocking) a large puddle of urin on the floor beside his chair (i now knwo why he was recliping his belt bucle as he hungup thye phone and wento bed)


PLEASE : someone tell me what the fuck is going on in his mind to mkae him think this type of behavior is acceptable as a father, i have trouble telling my father when i think he has done something retarded. But it is time now, please help me think of something to say to him.

To The Mods: please i have worked hard on this thread, i have just takena 1 month break and im kinds rusty so if i put it in the wrong spot, please forgive me and simply transfer is pleaase
 
I would guess that he is blacked out, and maybe took some benzos along with the alcohol. Also, by "ms vickies chips strewn about the place" do you mean that morphine sulfate, vicodin, and potato chips are all over the room? I wasn't sure if I understood this properly.

Are you high/drunk as well? Your typing seems to indicate that you may be under the influence as some of the same things as your father.
 
So your dad is having issues abusing substances and then doing embarrassing shit?

It's kind of awkward telling a parent to 'slow down on the jack' but I guess you can tactfully approach him asking if he's been doing alright etc.?
 
He is useing dilaudid and some random benzo's i see in his room. its sooo awkward, i wanna tell him "why do you care so muhc about certasin portions of your life and completely default them by being such a creep. hes a great erson i wish he could stay away form that fucked jup shit he does, he always talks to this girl on the phone and i think he might be screwing around in some way, like ym dad jhas a family and the fact thaT HE could dot hat ./. its messed.

and incase ur wondering, yes iu am higgh on weed
 
Yeah it sounds like he has substance abuse issues. I'm sorry man :(

Its not acceptable behavior. You might try and talk to you mother about it if you can, or your father when he's sober. Let them know how concerned you are and how this is affecting you.
 
He will most likely be feeling pretty bad when he wakes up, and I don't just mean headache. Alcohol can make you feel really depressed the next day, and I find that to be especially true when mixed with benzos. It may cause rebound anxiety which also adds to the list of hangover symptoms.

I think the best thing would be to talk to him calmly, and do not yell at him when you confront him. I will tell you from first-hand experience that the morning after waking from a alcohol/benzo blackout that you feel really shitty about yourself. All that I would think about for hours was how much of a screw-up I felt like, and how many people did I possibly embarass myself in front of (I am a student at the University).

So your father is most likely going to be just feeling so bad, that is why I think that it is important not to verbally attack him, and just be supportive. Maybe ask if there is anything that you can do to help, but also calmly remind him that what happened last night (or whenever this happened, not sure of your time zone etc) was unacceptable. He will obviously know that what he did was unacceptable, but it is important to remind him that although you support him, that you cannot be an enabler of that activity.

You may also want to discuss where these pills are coming from, and remind him of the legal issues that may arise while acquiring the pills.

Good luck to you and your father
 
he got doped out and flipped a tit. surprise surprise. stay away from benzos and alcohol [please be a bit more sensitive with your comments, remember this is The Dark Side, thanks - n3o].
 
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/\ Yeh I agree, benzos and alcohol will tear a person down into pieces. It just turns you into a zombie you don't get anxious about ANYTHING. Opiates have the withdrawals and all but I'm never a mess on them, mostly the contrary.
I mean when I use to take like 6mg of xanax and have just a few beers, I was in a BAD STATE. Never mind peeing where I want when I need to go (most of the time not in the house lol) but when you're in the mindstate things don't make you anxious at all.

I think that noise could have easily been his ass falling down and he lied and said he threw a chair. I only say that because I use to fall down so many times myself and lie about what the noise was. Theres not much you can do but start communicating with your mother and outline a plan of action.
You have to calibrate how bad his addiction is and how much its affecting your life. If shit like this is happening everyday, I'd somehow find a way to get his ass out of the house. Father or not, hes a fucking mess. What would he do to you if you were acting that way? I mean hes telling you not to "sleep late" and hes pissing himself all over the floor? Comeon man if that was my dad I'd grab that mfkr by the throat and start some drama.
But we live in an italian family and drama is usually what works for us.

Its just so hard for us to tell you how to run your family, I really think you and your mom need to do some brainstorming.
 
Im sorry you are going through this with your dad, it must be hard. How old are you incidentally? I was very lucky to not have been exposed to any kind of abuse like that (substance) while growing up (now how the HELL that explains MY extremely addicting personality??? Hmmmm...another convo I suppose)...but i can imagine it is very emotionally hard.

One tip....you say you are high on weed....PLEASE use your Dad's behavior as an example of a road you DON'T want to go down. Quite literally, you don't want to end up making an ass out of yourself and hurting the people who love you...and while weed may be "harmless" in the minds of some, it often leads to bigger shit for a lot of people.

While most of us here on BL LOVE our highs, I think you'd be hard pressed to find any ONE of us that don't regret going down this road at some point or another. PLEASE learn from your dad's mistakes...that is the very best thing you can do. And, ask your Mom (or other supportive/trusted adult) if they could help you get into some therapy (like an al-a-non) to help you deal with the emotional turmoil you have as a result of your dad's dumb-ass hurtful behavior and addiction. With any luck, he'll get the help he needs as well, but only HE can help himself in the end.

Very best of luck to you!!!
 
Benzos and alcohol are probably the cause of this strange behavior. I used phenazepam and 1,4 BDO together and it made me into an angry cock sucker who made very poor decisions.
 
I dunno man, if I found a pool of urine on the floor I would not hesitate to sock him in the nose. ( I can not stand people who lack the ability to hold their liquor, also, people who are that fucked up usually cant be talked to, at least not under the influence.)
 
drscience said:
I dunno man, if I found a pool of urine on the floor I would not hesitate to sock him in the nose. ( I can not stand people who lack the ability to hold their liquor, also, people who are that fucked up usually cant be talked to, at least not under the influence.)
Click to expand...

one time he was so drunk he bassed out on the floor with his bants all thwe way down, AND THE ROOM IN A COMPLETE MESS.
 
dokomo said:
Yeah it sounds like he has substance abuse issues. I'm sorry man :(

Its not acceptable behavior. You might try and talk to you mother about it if you can, or your father when he's sober. Let them know how concerned you are and how this is affecting you.
Click to expand...

I agree with this.

ben, I'm so sorry you have to witness your dad being so out of control. You father needs some serious help. How does your mother feel about all of this? Could you sit down with her to come up with a plan to get your dad the help he needs?
If you feel like you need to talk to someone about it all as well, don't hesitate to seek some counselling of your own.
 
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