Alright, so on the 23rd of February I was given a script for Ativan, which I began taking daily about a week or so afterwards at higher doses than prescribed (2-4 mg daily was the script, I took 3-8mg daily for a period of 2 and a half weeks, with daily doses greatly varying throughout, not climbing gradually), my reason being, I had previously been sporadically taking Zopiclone (Imovane) on a somewhat frequent basis for about a month before, and it happened to greatly raise my tolerance to GABA-A benzo's, Lorazepam in particular. I did not develop a dependency on the Zopiclone, only taking it daily for about a week or so before stopping with no ill effects, other than my anxiety which is there regardless. I went 4-5 days in between the Zopiclone and the Ativan script.
Alright, so theres the info on what I was taking, in what doses and for how long. I saw my doctor on the 4th of April (After 2 and a half weeks of the daily Ativan usage) and he got me set up on Amitriptyline and .5mg of Xanax as needed for Anxiety. The thought of having a dependency on Ativan never even crossed my mind. I wasnt aware it was possible to become dependant on Benzo's in that short a time frame. Later that day, after not taking anything, I started to feel REALLY bad. Just messed up. Anyone who's felt it knows what I mean I guess. I didnt know what the fuck was up until I took 1.5mg of Ativan, followed by 4 more .5mg's over the next couple of hours, to lower the anxiety. By that time I was starting to think it may be WD, but having only experienced WD's on Opiods, I wasn't sure as it felt very foreign to me. Anyways, the Ativan kicked in and took away the withdrawals, and I realised after reading up on Benzo dependency that I was gonna be in tough until I was off it, which is part of the reason I'm here. I woke up the next day feeling just god awful (I guess 3mg's was lower than what I'd been taking daily for some days before that) but I stayed at 3mg's daily as my starting point for the wean. I got myself down to 2mg's over a period of about a week before finally talking to my doctor and telling him the situation. He set me up on a 2 week wean from 2mg's, and I am currently dropping to .5mg's today.
He told me it was fine to take the Xanax as I needed it, said there was no cross tolerance, which I have found to be true from experience as well as reading up on the subject (Xanax being a GABA-B benzo). I have been taking the Xanax daily at an average of 1-1.5mg's daily for about a week and a half (I have on occasion gone over the prescribed dose, for legitimate anxiety, as my tolerance spiked after only 2-3 uses, as it seems to with just about every fcking medication I've ever been on).
My questions are, 1) Am I going to experience the extended Post-Acute Withdrawal I keep fucking reading about or should I be fine considering the short time frame of daily usage?
I excersise daily, drink Green tea daily (Although I'll be switching to decaf now), take all my fucking vitamins daily, as well as Omega-3, and I use meditation everyday as well. I'm a firm believer in us being capable of "re-wiring" our brains and reward pathways as I have seen countless addicts, who were much more far gone than myself, pull themselves out of it to go on and live life sober and much happier lives than before, by doing a shitton of self-evaluation and "training" their minds to think differently and react differently, which in turn and over time changes the things that give you pleasure and happiness. I myself am a positive thinker and I'm dedicated to getting through whatever the fuck may come after I'm off of this, I just want to know what I'm looking at here.
My second question is, am I going to have to wean off the Xanax as well after this?
Last question I have is, do I need to worry about the seizure risk at all? I know Amitriptyline lowers the threshold (I'm on 75mg's ftr) and so does coming off a Benzo, although I have to assume under these circumstances I dont have to worry about that at all? I just tend to overthink absolutely everything due to my fucking anxiety.
Any opinions and advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read.
Alright, so theres the info on what I was taking, in what doses and for how long. I saw my doctor on the 4th of April (After 2 and a half weeks of the daily Ativan usage) and he got me set up on Amitriptyline and .5mg of Xanax as needed for Anxiety. The thought of having a dependency on Ativan never even crossed my mind. I wasnt aware it was possible to become dependant on Benzo's in that short a time frame. Later that day, after not taking anything, I started to feel REALLY bad. Just messed up. Anyone who's felt it knows what I mean I guess. I didnt know what the fuck was up until I took 1.5mg of Ativan, followed by 4 more .5mg's over the next couple of hours, to lower the anxiety. By that time I was starting to think it may be WD, but having only experienced WD's on Opiods, I wasn't sure as it felt very foreign to me. Anyways, the Ativan kicked in and took away the withdrawals, and I realised after reading up on Benzo dependency that I was gonna be in tough until I was off it, which is part of the reason I'm here. I woke up the next day feeling just god awful (I guess 3mg's was lower than what I'd been taking daily for some days before that) but I stayed at 3mg's daily as my starting point for the wean. I got myself down to 2mg's over a period of about a week before finally talking to my doctor and telling him the situation. He set me up on a 2 week wean from 2mg's, and I am currently dropping to .5mg's today.
He told me it was fine to take the Xanax as I needed it, said there was no cross tolerance, which I have found to be true from experience as well as reading up on the subject (Xanax being a GABA-B benzo). I have been taking the Xanax daily at an average of 1-1.5mg's daily for about a week and a half (I have on occasion gone over the prescribed dose, for legitimate anxiety, as my tolerance spiked after only 2-3 uses, as it seems to with just about every fcking medication I've ever been on).
My questions are, 1) Am I going to experience the extended Post-Acute Withdrawal I keep fucking reading about or should I be fine considering the short time frame of daily usage?
I excersise daily, drink Green tea daily (Although I'll be switching to decaf now), take all my fucking vitamins daily, as well as Omega-3, and I use meditation everyday as well. I'm a firm believer in us being capable of "re-wiring" our brains and reward pathways as I have seen countless addicts, who were much more far gone than myself, pull themselves out of it to go on and live life sober and much happier lives than before, by doing a shitton of self-evaluation and "training" their minds to think differently and react differently, which in turn and over time changes the things that give you pleasure and happiness. I myself am a positive thinker and I'm dedicated to getting through whatever the fuck may come after I'm off of this, I just want to know what I'm looking at here.
My second question is, am I going to have to wean off the Xanax as well after this?
Last question I have is, do I need to worry about the seizure risk at all? I know Amitriptyline lowers the threshold (I'm on 75mg's ftr) and so does coming off a Benzo, although I have to assume under these circumstances I dont have to worry about that at all? I just tend to overthink absolutely everything due to my fucking anxiety.
Any opinions and advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read.
