TDS Unique problem, heart disease, drugs and family

[Polluted_Mind]

So I went for a routine checkup at the doctors the other day and when the GP took my pulse he sort of looked at me in a strange way, and without saying much quickly got the nurse and asked to set an ECG up. It was pretty clear from the look on his face and his concern that there was something wrong . They did an ECG and found significant problems so booked me into a cardiologist the next day.

I went to the cardiologist and he comprehensively took my history including drug use (which I was open about as assumed this would be the best way for a proper treatment to be planned), then did an ultrasound of the heart. I was very calm during the whole thing, even when he then explained that I have quite bad heart problems (left ventricle isn't working properly, frequent ectopic beats, and arrhythmia). He was quite concerned and now am booked for more tests.

I'm OK with this and can deal with it (it's life, and I seriously never had much intention of growing old anyway -- I'm 25 now).

Here's my problem: I decided to call my parents up and tell them about it, they were concerned which was normal but then my mother told me to fax my father the results -- my dad is a well known surgeon, and has connections to get the best treatment possible. That's all cool BUT then I realized that he's most likely going to call the cardiologist up and discuss my situation.

This raises numerous issues for me: the cardiologist will reveal the true cause of the issue: prior heavy ecstasy and amphetamine use (something my parents have NO idea about, I told them this was all due to stress/anxiety, which is only partly correct). Furthermore they will discuss what medications I am on, and prior medical history/hospitalizations, many of which my parents do not know about, and reveal a whole galaxy of other things I have been hiding from them, and REALLY don't want them to know!

I've racked my brains to find out a way of avoiding this but can't think of anything. Do I just send my Dad the results which don't have the cardiologist's name on them (only that of the GP), and then cross my fingers he doesn't try to get through to the cardiologist?

The only other option is to call the cardiologist's office first thing Monday and specifically tell them to tell the doctor to not discuss my results with anyone else if they call.

Thoughts??

 

[Swimmingdancer]

Well you could come clean with your family - it might be a weight off your shoulders to not have to hide your past from them.

But if you really don't want to do that:

I'd ask the cardiologist not to discuss anything with anyone, including family, without your prior consent.

If your dad ends up wanting to talk to him, you could explain to your cardiologist that your dad is a surgeon and may be calling him but you ask that he keep your confidentiality and you want to choose exactly what would be shared with your dad. That way you could allow him to share info about your current condition and recent tests but not any info about about your drug history or other medical records.

Just because your dad is a surgeon doesn't mean he should get access to your medical records, you're 25 and not your dad's patient right? So I wouldn't worry too much that the doc is going to spill all to your dad if he contacts him. But who knows though, sometimes medical professionals do unethical things without really thinking about it when talking to a family member of the patient or someone who is also a Dr, so it might make you feel better to call and say specifically not to discuss anything without your consent. Can't guarantee your dad wouldn't still (as a Dr) be able to find out some details through other means, but perhaps you are stressing over what might be nothing, in that your dad might just want to look at your test results and know that you're getting good care?

Also don't get too hopeless about these preliminary test results, it doesn't mean you're going to die young or that you can do nothing to improve your heart health

 

[herbavore]

Your cardiologist cannot discuss anything with anyone other than you without your written consent. Like SD said, I would recommend telling the cardiologist that you would authorize him to discuss your heart, the damage and the prognosis but not your drug use.
Are you staying away from stims now?

 

[Polluted_Mind]

Thanks for the replies, am definitely going to take that on board. It was the worst possible decision of my life to go and try and get medical treatment. All it did was cost money, then the money for the medication, then going to the doctor for bipolar and splashing out more money.

Now to the point where have none left, can't even eat or get to university, dad refuses to help in this regard (he's of the opinion I should be paying it myself, but doesn't understand that someone with bad bipolar... if you can just do a day of good study that's a miracle, yet alone adding work on top of a 28 hr class load).

Next couple of days will be interesting, if I can't go to uni anymore I'm as good as over, and without any parental support I'm as good as fucked.

I'm very very tempted to pre-empt what the heart disease is eventually going to do. Problem is I've tried different ways before but nothing works, and have no worthy drugs handy apart from temazepam.

I think I'll just knock myself out for the moment on that and maybe tomorrow there will be a glimmer of some hope (although cannot possibly see how).

 

[herbavore]

I don't know what country you are in, but if it is the U.S. there may be help for your university because of your bipolar. Have you tried talking to a counselor in financial aid? If you have already tried that, call your county mental health services and see if they have any advice for you.

hang on and don't make any rash decisions right now. Figure out where you can turn for support. This is a lot to go through and the best thing you can do right now is to try to stay calm inside and not project out into the future. Then you can look for support. If you get discouraged that becomes harder to do. Much love to you. I'm really sorry that your Dad doesn't get how hard you are working. Recommend that he go to a NAMI class ( family education class). Also, you might recommend this.