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Harm Reduction Unable to register anymore/messed up hand veins

THE_REAL_OBLIVION

THE_REAL_OBLIVION

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Apr 17, 2005
Messages
3,183
Location
Burning down Doug Ford's house
Hey guys, first off, i know i'm in the deep end of addiction and on the 26th....almost a month after i asked to be admitted to the methadone clinic (ffs, this is stupidly long).

Okay now the main problem, I barely get by obtaining a couple 4mg dilaudid, sometimes 4 from the most understanding dealer i ever met, he knows about my pain issues, he doesn't know I IV them tho, i think that would cause him to stop selling to me.

Since 2 days, I am unable to find a place to register in my hands (it is the only place where i'm able to IV, I'm starting to wonder if the very dark blue veins on the other side of my arm, on the wrist would be a viable place to use).

My hands are scarred and messed up, yesterday i found one spot for a 4 mg shot. Right now, i just missed so much and lost like half my shot (the droplet i would put back in the securiup on the cotton balls provided with them, so at least i think i didn't lost all of it.

I would def stop right now when it has come to this point, but i won't be admitted to the methadone clinic if i have no opiates in my blood, so I have to continue until the 26th.

What can I do to find other places to IV ? Seriously, I almost went and broke down and cried from the last failure at registring, so I ended up skin popping...i'm feeling it...it seems to be lasting longer than IV too...but I know how dangerous it is and i dont want to do it again.

I have one 4mg dilly left...what can I do ? Wait as long as possible, maybe go to sleep, let my hands heal and try to register then?

I just want to feell that sweet sweet rush only dillies provide...because i'm about to never ever feel it again, since i'll be on methadone 24/7...


tl;dr Hand veisn are fucked, can't register, never was able to register anywhere, what to do ?

If this is considered the wrong forum, mods move the post as you please.
 
Subcutaneous injections with clean needles aren't terribly concerning -- though doing it with a vasoconstrictor such as cocaine or methamphetamine can lead to necrosis -- but that you've worked your way through every vein in your body and can't inject anywhere is a clear sign of a problem. This should probably go in The Dark Side.

I've little experience with smoking opioids, but I know you can't really effectively smoke the phenols, including hydromorphone, because they're too unstable, so don't try that. Acetylmorphone might be smokeable.
 
The only thing I am able to obtain is dilaudid off the black market.

I think I might just give in and snort what i got left like in the old days. Heh.

And no, i'm sure i have good veins somewhere else, that's not on my hands. But i was never able to register there. I'm not fat, but i'm a bit flabby. I even use my guitar's amp cord to compress the area near the inside of my elbow to no avail, nothing pops out.
 
Response to Bluelighter's retreating veins and their inability to register anymore

THE_REAL_OBLIVION said:
The only thing I am able to obtain is dilaudid off the black market.

I think I might just give in and snort what i got left like in the old days. Heh.

And no, i'm sure i have good veins somewhere else, that's not on my hands. But i was never able to register there. I'm not fat, but i'm a bit flabby. I even use my guitar's amp cord to compress the area near the inside of my elbow to no avail, nothing pops out.
Click to expand...

Now, while SWIM doesn't exactly recommend this, due to the close proximity of arteries to veins in both the neck and wrist, but when SWIM blew out nearly EVERY vein in their entire body (excluding their legs, as there are still a few there, but, for reasons unknown to SWIM, the leg injections never ever seem to end in a euphoric satisfaction, but instead end with an itchy, frustrating state of affairs.) SWIM ended up resorting to, and hold onto your seats here, as this may sound rather morbid, but They've resorted to various neck veins. The great size of these combined with the ability to easily pressurize them and make them protrude by flexing their facial/upper torso region allows for a great many options. Just do be careful. SWIM's told arteries lie ever so close to veins here (but you'll know an artery due to it's BRIGHT red blood and copious, even forceful stream upon drawback) The other reason SWIM's been told to avoid this region is that these veins apparently travel straight to the lungs and heart, both awful places to engender infection, SO PRACTICE STERILE TECHNIQUE LIKE YOUR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT, IT JUST MAY. Lastly, if you do accidentally discharge into a neck area artery, you run the risk of swelling occurring around your wind pipe and restricting your breathing to the point of potential death. Though, SWIM's never experienced this in THOUSANDS of injections in the neck, having a partner around to save you or rush you to a hospital is probably a good idea. Only once did SWIM hit an artery, and it was in their wrist, and it took care of itself after a relatively short time, without medical intervention. Having said that, don't assume SWIM's luck will be something you can ride out as well. SWIM has lived a rather charmed life, and they count the above as evidence of said charmed life.
 
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Read up on clonidine and other quitting med combo's and just accept that the days of safe and easy injection are behind you. You had your ride, you had your fun, but now the seriousness and complications are going to begin growing exponentially. It's not as bad as you think it'll be if you have the proper quitting tools/meds available. Take the time to read up on what those are, collect them, then prepare for a surprisingly anti-climactic quitting process. If u have what u need to fight the withdrawals, the process is just inconvenient. It's not as bad as the nightmare you've likely built it up to be in your head. So, yeah, get out while the getting out's good. Or, wait until you experience the most serious consequences this addiction can conjure up, like SWIM's friend whose 3 open heart surgeries and subsequent pig based replacement valves(which fail every few years) have turned her financial, marital, and familial life upside down. Not to mention her sense of serenity and peace. I don't mean to throw scare tactics at you in hopes of your listening, these are real examples in SWIM's life though. I couldn't make that shit up.
 
Reminds me of my sister sitting at the dining room table for hours trying to find a vein.

Give your veins a rest. I'm not brave enough for the neck thing. Just swallow or snort the dilaudid
 
It's not like your options are limited to either keeping injecting or quitting and therefore making yourself ineligible for the methadone program. You could swallow them or plug them (rectal). I know how hard it can be to imagine using a ROA other than injection when you're used to injecting, but it does work. Especially if all you need to do is keep yourself from getting withdrawals for until you can get on methadone. But if you insist on continuing to inject there are tons of threads on here about the best injection techniques and veins to use. On the bright side, maybe no longer being able to hit a vein will help motivate you to quit: that's when I really got serious about quitting, when my veins got so bad it would take me over 5 hrs just to register and I would be crying and feeling pathetic.

Personally I wish I had just tapered off instead of going on methadone, methadone withdrawals are a whole other kind of hell that seem to last forever. But that's another issue. I know it can be very hard to quit cold turkey or even taper if you aren't really ready.

Personally I think it was right that this thread was moved to OD - they are the experts on injection and opioids and this thread is too triggering for TDS and sounds more about what to do to be able to inject as opposed to just getting mental support with quitting. But the OP could make a separate thread in TDS for mental support with cravings etc if they want to.
 
THE_REAL_OBLIVION said:
I would def stop right now when it has come to this point, but i won't be admitted to the methadone clinic if i have no opiates in my blood, so I have to continue until the 26th
Click to expand...

If you can definitely stop as you say, then stop now and don't go down the methadone route.

If not, then plugging (as Swimmingdancer suggested) is probably your best option.
 
Having a nice hot bath helps to bring your veins closer to the surface so they are more visible.
Also you could try doing push ups or lifting some weights before you want to inject as this also brings the veins up and making sure you keep well hydrated is important and also helps your veins become more visible and easier to hit.
 
I'm not sure if I'm quite understanding why you can only IV in the hands.. Have you totally damaged the veins in your forearms and biceps to the point where it's the only viable option? If you just can't hit in other spots, than I suggest you look through this site, this site, and finally this very helpful thread on IV technique and related complications.

If the situation is that you just find it hard to hit the veins in your arms, then you're in relatively good luck (I guess) as most users find the hands much harder to hit, so with a bit of practice you should be able to get it down quick. If you really can only hit in the hands, make sure you are using as small of a gauged needle as possible. I use my hands as well, and the best tools for the job IMO are the 30-31g short tip 1/2cc syringes. Much less scarring and vein damage, just make sure to never use the same needle more than once.
 
Znegative said:
I'm not sure if I'm quite understanding why you can only IV in the hands.. Have you totally damaged the veins in your forearms and biceps to the point where it's the only viable option? If you just can't hit in other spots, than I suggest you look through this site, this site, and finally this very helpful thread on IV technique and related complications.

If the situation is that you just find it hard to hit the veins in your arms, then you're in relatively good luck (I guess) as most users find the hands much harder to hit, so with a bit of practice you should be able to get it down quick. If you really can only hit in the hands, make sure you are using as small of a gauged needle as possible. I use my hands as well, and the best tools for the job IMO are the 30-31g short tip 1/2cc syringes. Much less scarring and vein damage, just make sure to never use the same needle more than once.
Click to expand...

I'm wondering the same thing as you. If your hands are the last spot you are able to hit due to blowing out your other veins then plugging may be your best option. If you only hit your veins because you can't figure out how to hit elsewhere then take a look at a vein map and then go by feel. If you are flexing you should be able to feel a vein, and you can follow it down the whole way for future reference and also so you can find the best place for you to hit.
 
What about veins in your feet. I know they're not the best choice as the circulation is much poorer in the feet and consequently infection is a higher risk but I've been using mine to great effect and would still be doing so now if I had treated them with more respect instead of abusing the f@%k out of them. You live and learn.
 
^Not to mention how many germs there are on your feet, please wash the area with antibacterial soap for a good 60 seconds prior to administration. Micron filter and isopropyl swabs are non-negotiable.
 
I have never ever ever been able to register anywhere else, while on the top of my hands, there used to be huge bulging blue veins, emphasis on used to be.

I would quit if I could taper correctly to the guy who said to quit already.

I'd go on subs instead, but they are 25 dollars a day here, more expensive than my dilaudid habit!

While methadone is free, and I don't expect withdrawals, when i was evaluated by the nurse, she saw all my hand scarring and damage and I told her I lost faith in all doctors about pain issues and I don't mind being on methadone for the rest of my life if that's what I need.

I want to quit because :

1)damage to my hands, unable to find orally strong opiates on the black market
2)money, like a scumbag i have invented reasons so my parents would send money to my bank account so often...
3)for my own self respect, I never IV'd before i fell in love with dilaudid, well I did with DPT and DMT, but about twice each and thats a whole different thing that won't lead you to overuse of needles and destroying your body
4)maybe, just maybe once they realize i went this far because the assholes won't give me more than tylenol #3 with no refills and just 30 of them and want me to revisit my GP all the goddamn time (every month) just to get a refill and be talked to like if it was goddamn heroin, that I actually need something stronger than voltaren, clonidine and tylenol #3 to fight TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA
5) NEVER EVER AGAIN GET COTTON FEVER, THIS ONE TIME I GOT IT TWICE IN 3 DAYS, WITH CLEAN NEEDLES

And I'm out.

edit : and to "SWIM" gtfo out of here you goddamn troll and your neck injection tips, asshole, go back to df, lol
 
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So the methadone protocol is different in Canada? I don't get why they blood test clients as you wouldn't be there if you weren't hurting for opiates. The program at the clinic nearby me just states vaguely "that a person should be experiencing withdrawal." Then again it's not funded by the government either so people have to self-pay. Will they give you take home meds or do you have to come back every day?
 
I have to be over there at the hospital's methadone clinic for a week, then i get to go home, and pick my dose every morning, luckily the pharmacy is straight in front of my apartment. Then after some time with no fuck ups you get take homes that are larger and larger and only YOU decide when you are ready to quit slowly, very slowly, this part scares me, but its in a long time, quitting methadone under medical supervision under an extremely slow taper must be okay.

And yes capt. H, I just can't afford this habit of shooting dilaudid, i need 3 4mg shots a day at least or else hell awaits 2 day after. I can't believe I read a post of yours saying you shot 1mg of dilaudid once and felt it very strongly. Even when i wasn't shooting often, these damn lame turquoise 1mg dilaudids barely ever did anything to me. I already had a natural opiate tolerance before it all tho. I remember needing to extract 10 T3's (300mg codeine) to get high at first. Anything under 250mg codeine just makes me sleepy, even with no tolerance....heh. At least I don't have access to the holy grail triangle brand name 8mg dilaudids, the 4mg brand name ones are already tiny enough and require just the regular Stericup kits to IV ( I never attempted to IV anything else as everything else is world's apart in danger compared to brand name canadian purdue dilaudid.)
 
THE_REAL_OBLIVION said:
I have to be over there at the hospital's methadone clinic for a week, then i get to go home, and pick my dose every morning, luckily the pharmacy is straight in front of my apartment. Then after some time with no fuck ups you get take homes that are larger and larger and only YOU decide when you are ready to quit slowly, very slowly, this part scares me, but its in a long time, quitting methadone under medical supervision under an extremely slow taper must be okay.
Click to expand...

Yeah, that's what I thought too, I can taper off whenever, and a slow gradual taper should be pretty painless, at least that's what my clinic at the time said. SO WRONG! Try to get off it as soon as you can. I waited 10 years out of the fear of withdrawals and general procrastination, not really realizing until it was too late that the longer you are on methadone the more miserable it is to quit. Of course you don't want to quit too soon and just go back to using other drugs, but seriously put some effort into working on your mental addiction and the reasons you were using in the first place, and bear in mind that the sooner you get off methadone the easier it will be.

Also I'm from Canada too and I have been treated like shit by pharmacists, including them screwing up and refusing to give me my methadone, etc. So I hate being chained to the pharmacy, even if it is somewhat better than in the US where you have to go to the clinic every morning. Also after being on methadone for 10 years and having clean urine tests for at least the past 6 or 8 years I get to go to the pharmacy once a week - big deal :(

(Sorry I'm a little jaded but I wish someone had told me the truth when I first was considering going on methadone).
 
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