Two issues with this.
First, love, "real love" is never "selfish" in the negative sense of the word. This kind of love is the kind of love the kind and caring parent would give her child. It comes without condition, and certainly has more to do with kindness and companionship than any sense of possession. Selfish, as you used it, seems to have an inherently negative connotation. Love isn't inherently negative, it's the opposite. Love heals. That which is healing is love.
The bigger issue however is this idea of "self," which frankly I'm not too interested in getting wrapped up in. Suffice to say, how we conceptualize our place in the world and relate to one another (in terms of our ethics - if we even have any identifiable ones to begin with - for instance). In short, we ourselves are small things, unimportant in the grand scheme of things. It is important to acknowledge this. Yet, in our own lives, our the most valuable treasure that will ever be. We might be small things materially speaking, but that doesn't mean we cannot have largeness of mind (which is to say, a perspective that is well rounded, understanding and knowledgeable - we all already know the pit falls of the opposite of large mindedness, that being small/narrow mindedness).
To get more concrete though, what are you talking about in your post when you say self love OP? Would you define "self love" and "selfish" as you used the concepts in your post for us? Thanks!
