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took too much :(

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oswald1963

Greenlighter
Joined
Jul 8, 2010
Messages
17
before thanksgiving this year I had my first experience with mdma (blue alien heads) and took about a month break. I loved the feeling so much that I asked a friend about rolling and he told me he'd give me bomb pills. I got 20 somethin white butterflies and began a trip down e street.

Im trying to think about how many I took but its over 50 for sure...or more like 100 almost all pokeballs. I thought it was fun and the fun kept going for months where I would roll alot. It got to the point where it was over 10 pills in a night then I stopped...because I saw my dead grandma.

My friend who was giving me the pokeballs came over and we took yellow batmans. I ended up taking 7 in what I thought was 10-15 mins. Turns out 4 hours had passed and I cant remember anything we were talking about. He left and I retired to my room, but before I got there I saw my dead grandmother sitting in a rocking chair. I rushed to my room and when I laid down I watched my shutters turn back and fourth opening and closing. Lets just say it was a bad night :(

I started again and started getting "white outs" where Id white out and come to in random places doing something. This caused me to accidentally take a large portion of my sheet which caused complete ego death.

I was just wondering if after all this am I going to be okay? I feel okay and its been a couple months but im still scared that something gonna be fucked up in the long run and its just bugging me. meh this is more directed for hardcore ravers from the 90's cause by now you would know of any mental imparement. Please let me know :)
 
Last edited:
oswald1963 said:
before thanksgiving this year I had my first experience with mdma (blue alien heads) and took about a month break. I loved the feeling so much that I asked a friend about rolling and he told me he'd give me bomb pills. I got 20 somethin white butterflies and began a trip down e street.

Im trying to think about how many I took but its over 50 for sure...or more like 100 almost all pokeballs. I thought it was fun and the fun kept going for months where I would roll alot. It got to the point where it was over 10 pills in a night then I stopped...because I saw my dead grandma.

My friend who was giving me the pokeballs came over and we took yellow batmans. I ended up taking 7 in what I thought was 10-15 mins. Turns out 4 hours had passed and I cant remember anything we were talking about. He left and I retired to my room, but before I got there I saw my dead grandmother sitting in a rocking chair. I rushed to my room and when I laid down I watched my shutters turn back and fourth opening and closing. Lets just say it was a bad night :(

I started again and started getting "white outs" where Id white out and come to in random places doing something. This caused me to accidentally take a large portion of my sheet which caused complete ego death.

I was just wondering if after all this am I going to be okay? I feel okay and its been a couple months but im still scared that something gonna be fucked up in the long run and its just bugging me. meh this is more directed for hardcore ravers from the 90's cause by now you would know of any mental imparement. Please let me know :)
Click to expand...


Dude you came to the right place.
I'm sorry you took so much, but you're def in the right place for advice.
 
Im sure a lot of the people using this thread have abused the hell out of MDMA and lived to tell the tale. You noticed you had a problem and have cut back so well done on that - to answer your question Im a oldschool Raver from the 80's with no lasting problems.

You have to slow down though if you continue to use in that way you will end up with problems.
 
Wow bro, I never had anything that crazy happen, such as seeing a dead relative, that would probably share the shit out of me.. I abused the hell out of MDMA for approx 8 months and recently met what I decided was my burnout.. I was feeling absolutely horrible the days after, I mean horrible, thoughts in my head where I would be stuck with these feelings for the rest of my life, anxiety for days after, you name it.. Luckily and thank god I am recovering, slowly. 10 pills in one night, now I cant compete with that, but you can read about my experience here..

http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/showthread.php?t=518808

everyone at bluelight offered me great support, you may find comfort.

Stay strong man :)
 
I used to take about 15-20 pills a night every weekend before I finally realised what a dick I was being. 6 months of brainzaps and shit concentration and I'm fine again.

You'll be fine too, with some people you only realise you're overdoing it when you have done.
 
Im on day 6 after my experience and I still have mild bouts of anxiety, getting better though, didnt sleep at all last night due to not smoking weed (im a daily pot smoker), it would increase the anxiety for the moment being, hopefully i can just pass out after work..
 
i used to eat over a gram on many occasions and never saw anything like that... it had to be tjhe shit it was cut with dude. i would NEVER eat 10 E pills, i only ate that much in equivalence to molly cause it was pure.. holy fuck man.. if I saw my dead grandma and experienced a k hole pretty much that would haunt me in my sleep

worst I had was hearing voices for a month after. you will be fine if you feel fine now.
 
^
Ehhhh that's not true. It wouldn't have to be cut with anything in order for that to happen. People react differently to drugs, so come on, obviously different people are going to have different problems from over use, so yours are different from his, that's not surprising.

OP, if you didn't thizz at all from now on, and you can't tell that anythings wrong from your abuse, then you won't get any worse than you are now(which apparently is fine, you're lucky!).

I didn't abuse as much as you but used a bit longer than you. I got/get this list of things:

Dyslexia(especially when writing on paper),
Worse short term memory
Slightly worse long term memory, but this seemed to somewhat come back

and I do 2 things that I guess could be called hallucinating?: Especially at night, I'll see someone or some animal/pet out of the corner of my eye, then look over a second later and nothings there. MULTIPLE TIMES EVERY DAY. The other thing is I'll often look at my floor or wall and it's like it's moving a bit in waves, or going in and out a bit, very very clearly. At first I just said "your just imagining that, it'll go away", but it hasn't.

For referance, I've only shroomed a few times and not in at least 4.5 months, and the last time I rolled was 3 months ago, where I ate at least 5 MDMA/meth/2c-x pills (after doing other drugs previous days but none that should have made this worse). The next two days I had crazy hallucinations and kept thinking I knew every stranger(because they looked just like somebody I knew), and kept getting brain zaps for a few days.
Not all this is gone, but it's all gotten at least a bit better..
 
Just please take it easy from now on. A VERY long break would be a good idea. I don't think you've ruined your brain, or anything of the sort. Take some piracetam, multi-vits perhaps and eat healthy. Just don't do any drugs for quite a while. <3
 
oswald1963 said:
before thanksgiving this year I had my first experience with mdma (blue alien heads) and took about a month break. I loved the feeling so much that I asked a friend about rolling and he told me he'd give me bomb pills. I got 20 somethin white butterflies and began a trip down e street.

Im trying to think about how many I took but its over 50 for sure...or more like 100 almost all pokeballs. I thought it was fun and the fun kept going for months where I would roll alot. It got to the point where it was over 10 pills in a night then I stopped...because I saw my dead grandma.

My friend who was giving me the pokeballs came over and we took yellow batmans. I ended up taking 7 in what I thought was 10-15 mins. Turns out 4 hours had passed and I cant remember anything we were talking about. He left and I retired to my room, but before I got there I saw my dead grandmother sitting in a rocking chair. I rushed to my room and when I laid down I watched my shutters turn back and fourth opening and closing. Lets just say it was a bad night :(

I started again and started getting "white outs" where Id white out and come to in random places doing something. This caused me to accidentally take a large portion of my sheet which caused complete ego death.

I was just wondering if after all this am I going to be okay? I feel okay and its been a couple months but im still scared that something gonna be fucked up in the long run and its just bugging me. meh this is more directed for hardcore ravers from the 90's cause by now you would know of any mental imparement. Please let me know :)
Click to expand...

I did a lot more e than you for a lot longer and I turned out just fine =D
 
thanks for the replies! I too am experiencing the dyslexia..well I dont know if its exactly that ill write the word backwards..like instead of like ill start spelling it ekil but I stop myself before I write the whole word.

Im not rolling again for a long time. Actually I stopped that and smoking weed because my anxiety was at an all time high. Im currently taking anti anxiety meds and really happy. Im not sure if I want to ever roll again but I may just roll once or twice a year. My experiences really fucked with my mind because I never heard of people blacking out on e.,,well not blacking out but them losing their vision and waking up in other places. It was like my mind shut off and my body was in auto run it scares me to think of what I could have done im lucky I never left the confines of my yard..I think.
 
3 years ago when I first discovered e, I fell in love with it and began a year long BINGE. It was honestly ridiculous, one day I finally borderline OD'ed on around 15 ills taken at about the same time
Oh and The reason I was able to binge on seemingly endless x was because I got it for dirt cheap from a really solid connect

that scared me straight away from x until last fall when I went to monster massive, I have not noticed any long term damageHOWEVER for about 6 months after I stopped with the x, I would wake up feeling weak, mindless, drained and forgetful
I also experienced pretty serious vertigo whenever I would stand up


Everything is normal for me now though
 
sir_thizzalot said:
^
Ehhhh that's not true. It wouldn't have to be cut with anything in order for that to happen. People react differently to drugs, so come on, obviously different people are going to have different problems from over use, so yours are different from his, that's not surprising.

OP, if you didn't thizz at all from now on, and you can't tell that anythings wrong from your abuse, then you won't get any worse than you are now(which apparently is fine, you're lucky!).

I didn't abuse as much as you but used a bit longer than you. I got/get this list of things:

Dyslexia(especially when writing on paper),
Worse short term memory
Slightly worse long term memory, but this seemed to somewhat come back

and I do 2 things that I guess could be called hallucinating?: Especially at night, I'll see someone or some animal/pet out of the corner of my eye, then look over a second later and nothings there. MULTIPLE TIMES EVERY DAY. The other thing is I'll often look at my floor or wall and it's like it's moving a bit in waves, or going in and out a bit, very very clearly. At first I just said "your just imagining that, it'll go away", but it hasn't.

For referance, I've only shroomed a few times and not in at least 4.5 months, and the last time I rolled was 3 months ago, where I ate at least 5 MDMA/meth/2c-x pills (after doing other drugs previous days but none that should have made this worse). The next two days I had crazy hallucinations and kept thinking I knew every stranger(because they looked just like somebody I knew), and kept getting brain zaps for a few days.
Not all this is gone, but it's all gotten at least a bit better..
Click to expand...

it is true that they could have been cut, because they were pills. so how does he know they were MDMA exactly for sure? he doesn't. pure MDMA is hard to OD on hence eating such a high dose the only experience you normally have are audio hallucinations/rem sleep. i understand it varies per person but the fact he ate pills and not pure MDMA means it was the cut..
 
Sleep deprivation also creeps up as a main cause of alot of "psychosis like" symptoms. after taking.... 4...5... pure mollies, after 50 km+ of foot and bike travel and VERY little to eat, I was having full blown conversations with myself, imagining friends that i'm close with in the dark beside me that were NOT there.

I think if one takes MDMA to much and is alone weirder things can happen... friend of mine would see "ghosts" after binges and doesn't anymore since she stopped.

MDMA is weird like that is just makes you crave human contact so much that you'll create them subliminally during slips of the mind
 
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