the question no one wants to admit!!!
- Thread starter TasKAdiK
- Start date
-=ReD-hAzE=-
Bluelighter
>>> Drug Culture.
I first realized I was addicted to meth when I had to quit because of probation. Everynight was spend dreaming of rolling that pipe and exhaling that sweet smoke.
I'm not still rockin' the boat, but I make some ripples now and then.
I'm in complete control now.
No regrets. Glad I didn't turn into a full blown tweaker like a few of my buddies did for a while.
I first realized I was addicted to meth when I had to quit because of probation. Everynight was spend dreaming of rolling that pipe and exhaling that sweet smoke.
I'm not still rockin' the boat, but I make some ripples now and then.
I'm in complete control now.
No regrets. Glad I didn't turn into a full blown tweaker like a few of my buddies did for a while.
Munted
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 20, 2001
- Messages
- 435
I was proper hooked on the pipe, meth was my poison. Blossomed into a beautiful crack-head (sarcasm intended!)!!! It took me a while to get off it, one thing that helped was a major life-threatening situation involving a gun being pointed and me a and a couple of mates. That kinda woke me up a little, I was soon at least trying to distance myself from it.
Now, I haven't touched meth for 2.5 years and I wouldn't if somebody gave me a kilo for free and paid me to smoke it! These days I value my fragile sanity just a little bit more than I used to!
I still binge on benzo's mild-opiates and MDMA, shrooms and the like, but as for Meth/Amphets. . . .not on your life. . .
Regrets I have so many. I massively hurt people I loved. My mum had cancer at the time, when she should have been thinking about getting better, she was pre-occupied and worried sick about her junkie son while she was slowly dying. I deserved a lot more pain than what I had visited upon me by the universe. I got off waaay too fucken light and it hurts me bad. I still want to be punished. . .
Once bitten, twice shy is what they say and it's oh so true. . .I hate you meth and I hate you "Past Munted" (As opposed to "Present Munted" of "Future Munted" things are peachy with them at the moment.)
Now, I haven't touched meth for 2.5 years and I wouldn't if somebody gave me a kilo for free and paid me to smoke it! These days I value my fragile sanity just a little bit more than I used to!
I still binge on benzo's mild-opiates and MDMA, shrooms and the like, but as for Meth/Amphets. . . .not on your life. . .
Regrets I have so many. I massively hurt people I loved. My mum had cancer at the time, when she should have been thinking about getting better, she was pre-occupied and worried sick about her junkie son while she was slowly dying. I deserved a lot more pain than what I had visited upon me by the universe. I got off waaay too fucken light and it hurts me bad. I still want to be punished. . .
Once bitten, twice shy is what they say and it's oh so true. . .I hate you meth and I hate you "Past Munted" (As opposed to "Present Munted" of "Future Munted" things are peachy with them at the moment.)
ebeneezer_geeza
Bluelighter
after using opiates for 5 yrs on a recreational basis my partner informed me i had a habit, i didnt beleive her, but then it dawned on me after i tried to stop, unfortunately it was methadone i was addicted to and getting off it wasnt easy.
I am now back on it 15yrs on.
I am sort of in control as i have managed to get off it when i decided to its just the depression and bipolar symptoms i endure when i am off it forces me back on. I cant remember ever being really out of control with my use on when i had injectables.
I am now back on it 15yrs on.
I am sort of in control as i have managed to get off it when i decided to its just the depression and bipolar symptoms i endure when i am off it forces me back on. I cant remember ever being really out of control with my use on when i had injectables.
Mr.Scagnattie
Bluelighter
I first relised I had a problem when I over dosed 3 times in 2 weeks, the 3rd time is when I relised it..
Im not using anymore finally,
regrets?....well Not really I learned alot from all of this made me wiser in life..so nope, no regrets
Im not using anymore finally,
regrets?....well Not really I learned alot from all of this made me wiser in life..so nope, no regrets
Ketamike
Bluelighter
--are you still rockin the boat
I've go on periods of being a full blown addict to twice a week chipper in the last 3 years. With perhaps about 5 months of total sobreity in that time. Right now I'm kicking after a two week binge. Drug in question? Heroin + Oxycodone.. or basically any opiod that will dissolve in water
--are you in control
Hmm.. you tell me. I'm all out of money, but I'm not stealing from anybody. I have accepted that if you want to play, you have to pay. I admit that I'm an addict, but I feel I'm in control... if you tell me I'm in denial.. I'll tell you that you're in denial.
--any regrets
I regret other people addictions for costing me a lot. Particularly my ex who got brainwashed in rehab and is now married to some 33 year old ex-cokehead. My only real regrets is that my credit is fuckered. I'm gonna have to pay for everything with cash for the rest of my life. The cash advance option should not be given to people with drug habits.
I've go on periods of being a full blown addict to twice a week chipper in the last 3 years. With perhaps about 5 months of total sobreity in that time. Right now I'm kicking after a two week binge. Drug in question? Heroin + Oxycodone.. or basically any opiod that will dissolve in water
--are you in control
Hmm.. you tell me. I'm all out of money, but I'm not stealing from anybody. I have accepted that if you want to play, you have to pay. I admit that I'm an addict, but I feel I'm in control... if you tell me I'm in denial.. I'll tell you that you're in denial.
--any regrets
I regret other people addictions for costing me a lot. Particularly my ex who got brainwashed in rehab and is now married to some 33 year old ex-cokehead. My only real regrets is that my credit is fuckered. I'm gonna have to pay for everything with cash for the rest of my life. The cash advance option should not be given to people with drug habits.
naturalone
Bluelighter
good question. i didn't realize the addictive nature of the drugs that i was doing for the first year or so. but, i would fiend. when i had my first real withdrawals, i realized that i was hooked, because instead of staying clean, i went back in. this was about 3 years ago.
definitely still rockin' the boat. harder than ever, really.
control? yeah, i guess so. successful family man, supporting two full households, my habit and running a continually growing company, plus acting in films, commercials and producing films.
regrets? eh, not really. i regret that i'm breaking the law by using these drugs, and that i keep secrets about my habit. have i done anything regretful (besides those two things) because of my habit? no. i typically regretted something every time i would get drunk tho
good questions.
definitely still rockin' the boat. harder than ever, really.
control? yeah, i guess so. successful family man, supporting two full households, my habit and running a continually growing company, plus acting in films, commercials and producing films.
regrets? eh, not really. i regret that i'm breaking the law by using these drugs, and that i keep secrets about my habit. have i done anything regretful (besides those two things) because of my habit? no. i typically regretted something every time i would get drunk tho
good questions.
SphynxCG
Bluelighter
I feel like a bit of a chump saying that I have a problem with cannabis (when there are obviously people with much more serious addiciton problems with more addicting drugs), but I certainly did. I smoked daily for over two years, and just recently made myself quit. For about six months every night before bed I would say to myself "you have to quit smoking pot, you have to quit smoking pot" over and over until I fell asleep. The next morning I would wake up and blaze a fat bowl...only to say the same things to myself that night.
I found that I just needed a good reason to get behind. I have to get a job this summer or I will be forced to leave my friends and go work in seattle, so my reason is that I don't want to miss a job opportunity due to a failed drug test. I am 10 days sober, incredibly depressed, and I dream about smoking pot every night. But im sober and that is what matters.
I am in control - I have been offered bowls so many times over the past week or so and have never given in. I do regret all the time I wasted smoking pot. I am just at the end of my freshman year, which was a complete waste of time as far as I am concerned. I don't have any real friends that I care about and I know it is directly because of the fact that I didnt do shit but watch tv episodes and smoke bowls. Hopefully I can get my life back over the next few months and make my sophomore year more substantial.
I found that I just needed a good reason to get behind. I have to get a job this summer or I will be forced to leave my friends and go work in seattle, so my reason is that I don't want to miss a job opportunity due to a failed drug test. I am 10 days sober, incredibly depressed, and I dream about smoking pot every night. But im sober and that is what matters.
I am in control - I have been offered bowls so many times over the past week or so and have never given in. I do regret all the time I wasted smoking pot. I am just at the end of my freshman year, which was a complete waste of time as far as I am concerned. I don't have any real friends that I care about and I know it is directly because of the fact that I didnt do shit but watch tv episodes and smoke bowls. Hopefully I can get my life back over the next few months and make my sophomore year more substantial.
renton405
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2004
- Messages
- 246
realized when i was hooked....hmmm....when I started to wake up in the morning trembling/achey with ice cold skin and extremely depressed before my morning shot of heroin...I knew I was in trouble...but did I stop? 
I really envy people who can control it (H, coke, meth) and just do it on the weekends for years...for me the mindpower to do that would beyond my control...but it seems so easy for some people...maybe it really is a genetic thing in the long run, rather than the usual "well its YOUR choice, you did it, now you have to pay"
I really envy people who can control it (H, coke, meth) and just do it on the weekends for years...for me the mindpower to do that would beyond my control...but it seems so easy for some people...maybe it really is a genetic thing in the long run, rather than the usual "well its YOUR choice, you did it, now you have to pay"
I also feel kind of bad posting about marijuana. They say you cant get addicted to it. They're right and wrong I guess. I've smoked pretty much daily for about 3 years, and have had to quite a few times for drug testing for work. (luckily my boss was into drugs more than me and I always got a solid 3 week notice).
Like others said, I never felt I was hooked untill I quit. I never had withdrawls or anything (not physically addicting) but there were manytimes where I would pace back and forth, and get anxious almost to the point of pulling my hair out, when I was first stoping. I still smoke alot between tests, but now when I do need to quit I taper down, makes it alot easier.
I hope no one feels like "Fuck you ohioguy, thats not addiction, try getting hooked on Heroin and you'll know what real addiction is". I've have friends hooked on coke, and a manager who was adicted hardcore on scag. I wish the best of luck to all who have "true" addictions.
Like others said, I never felt I was hooked untill I quit. I never had withdrawls or anything (not physically addicting) but there were manytimes where I would pace back and forth, and get anxious almost to the point of pulling my hair out, when I was first stoping. I still smoke alot between tests, but now when I do need to quit I taper down, makes it alot easier.
I hope no one feels like "Fuck you ohioguy, thats not addiction, try getting hooked on Heroin and you'll know what real addiction is". I've have friends hooked on coke, and a manager who was adicted hardcore on scag. I wish the best of luck to all who have "true" addictions.
~full*bloom~
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 26, 2004
- Messages
- 116
I used to smoke massive amounts of weed, well fuck who knows in comparison to some of the members on this board. I smoked from age 13 to 21 with small breaks in between. But I got a job working for the devil.... Sprint Telecommunications, and they did random drug tests all the time. In retrospect I should have quit Sprint in stead of the weed. Sprint is the devil.
pharmersteve
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 26, 2004
- Messages
- 22
surprised no one mentioned nicotine, its the drug with the highest rate of addiction now its not going to kill you after one drag but it certainly knocks a few to many years off your life.
SphynxCG
Bluelighter
pharmersteve said:
Yeah thats a good point, but I find it much easier to stop smoking cigarettes than pot. Quitting pot has been really challenging and the cravings just dont go away. When I get a craving for a cigarette I just ignore it for a few minutes and then I forget about it. Its not like I smoke cigarettes for the buzz all that much, its much more of an oral fixation.
Ghettotastic_bong
Bluelighter
It didn't take me very long to realize i was addicted (to cannabis of all things). I had only smoked for about two weeks on a daily basis, and it suddently became clear how addicted i was when i ran out. I lied in bed for maybe 3-4 hours trying to fall asleep being completely unable to. It was at that moment i quit cannabis, a habit which i picked up again a few months later in moderation.
I feel odd saying that it was addiction, given that many of the people here have been through so much worse. I guess i just have an addictive personality and have had the good fortune of not having had tried more addictive drugs.
I feel odd saying that it was addiction, given that many of the people here have been through so much worse. I guess i just have an addictive personality and have had the good fortune of not having had tried more addictive drugs.
- u still rockin' that boat?
Only when Im drunk. I have no desire to fuck w/coke/crack....until I get drunk.
-u in control?
I say yes. Going from a 1-4 8Ball habit every week, to using 3-4 times in a month seems pretty controlable.
- any regrets?
more than I care to share. In order to do coke/crack I had to lie to someone very close to me. I became a liar.....I fucking hate liars. I am very much back on track these days, and learned a lot, but lost a lot as well.
Only when Im drunk. I have no desire to fuck w/coke/crack....until I get drunk.
-u in control?
I say yes. Going from a 1-4 8Ball habit every week, to using 3-4 times in a month seems pretty controlable.
- any regrets?
more than I care to share. In order to do coke/crack I had to lie to someone very close to me. I became a liar.....I fucking hate liars. I am very much back on track these days, and learned a lot, but lost a lot as well.
DarkDante
Bluelighter
I first realized I had a problem with meth at the tail end of a particular 6 day binge I had a couple years ago. I was halfway through a shift at Wendy's, out of meth, and out of money, and I could literally feel my body shutting down while I crashed. I fucking fell asleep standing up at the drivethrough window, in between dinner and late night stoner rush. Thankfully my boss was kind enough to let me go home and crash (he knew I worked around 60 or more hours a week). After assing out for 2 days, I woke up in a state of self loathing, reflecting on my net worth of -$6000, and almost flunking out of school and working two shitty jobs just to pay bills and finance my habit.
--are you still rockin the boat
Yeah, somewhat. I only get geeked once every week or two now.
--are you in control
I feel that I am in control. I do meth (and other drugs for that matter) whenver I want to, and never do them out of sheer boredom or compulsion. Shit, I haven't smoked weed (a drug I've done every day since I was 16) for a month in preparation for wildland firefighter training. Mind over matter.
--any regrets
Well, my credit is somewhat fucked (I agree with Ketamike, cash advances are Satan!). I'm working to repair that now by paying bills on time, and slowly paying off creditors. I'm 23 and still working on an undergraduate degree. Do I have any regrets? Not really. It was all character building life experience in my opinion. I didn't die, and my health and sanity are more or less intact. It did teach me to respect substances a little more, and to be more rational about finances (no more credit cards!!!).
--are you still rockin the boat
Yeah, somewhat. I only get geeked once every week or two now.
--are you in control
I feel that I am in control. I do meth (and other drugs for that matter) whenver I want to, and never do them out of sheer boredom or compulsion. Shit, I haven't smoked weed (a drug I've done every day since I was 16) for a month in preparation for wildland firefighter training. Mind over matter.
--any regrets
Well, my credit is somewhat fucked (I agree with Ketamike, cash advances are Satan!). I'm working to repair that now by paying bills on time, and slowly paying off creditors. I'm 23 and still working on an undergraduate degree. Do I have any regrets? Not really. It was all character building life experience in my opinion. I didn't die, and my health and sanity are more or less intact. It did teach me to respect substances a little more, and to be more rational about finances (no more credit cards!!!).