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the high just isn't quite so mind-blowing anymore

royksopp

royksopp

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 29, 2006
Messages
849
Location
The Planet X
Lets say someone has followed the rules...mostly always got tested pills, and rolled at a frequency of approx. 2 Med Pills every 2-3 months for the first 2 years, then 3 pills every 4-5 months for the last 3 up to now.

That was my case. I have been rolling for 5 years.

I have never abused and always taken 3 month breaks, but after 5 years I feel that the high just isn't quite so mind-blowing anymore and while the immediate comedown is relatively painless the next couple weeks are usually pretty grey....

I am wondering if the magic just naturally has to fade away with time? Or can I ever feel the same way I did when it was my first...

Perhaps it subjective...maybe we just don't look at things the same after awhile. The element of surprise is perhaps lost.

Sometimes I wonder if its worth it to keep going...I still feel empathy and euphoria, but I act different when I am on it now. Sometimes it feels like my peak only last about 30min.

So what are your rolling stories? At what stage of use are you within the MDMA life cycle? Honeymoon? Plateau? Or Down regulation?

Do any of you have experience of rolling as hard as your first time all these years later?
 
the plain and simple answer is NO it will never feel like it did your first time....never...ever. The jury is still out on as to why. But your explanation is in line with what I have read here on the subject. When you take your first pill, the experience is so new and so different that anything else you've done in the past. I think that the newness is half the wonderment of the first experience and causes your first time to be that much better.

Now in your case, there are a number of factors that could be causing your experiences to fade with time. You have been in the game long enough to see the pill quality go from pretty good to piss poor so it might be that the pills just aren't what they used to be. It could be due to your duration of use. We still don't know all the ins and outs of long term use and its effects on each person and how they differ from person to person. It could also be that you have become complacent with the effects and might be looking for something different.

There are just too many variable to tell you for sure but if after rolling for 5 years you still get euphoria and empathy from MDMA than you should consider yourself blessed. Most people by this time would have lost that from abuse and would be bitching about how they screwed their head up by using too much.
 
I wish I had this problem, if I go out every weekend it still feels like the first time I ever dropped and it always bring me back for more, I have a pretty high level of abuse too. It amazes me how differently everbody is effected by this drug.
 
Just rolled clean pills for the first time in five months, smoked a little bud and it was just like the first time if not better.
 
At current moment I've only rolled twice, so I would say I'm still in the honeymoon phase. It wasn't near as strong a roll the second time though, but that might've just been the pills.
 
matt2012 said:
t if after rolling for 5 years you still get euphoria and empathy from MDMA than you should consider yourself blessed. Most people by this time would have lost that from abuse and would be bitching about how they screwed their head up by using too much.
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Yeah don't get me wrong, all of the effects we have come to know and love are still present...MDMA still makes me fall uncontrollably in love....I feel a genuine connection and compassion to other people and the waves of euphoria, yet still something is missing. Its like buying a PS3 and being blown away by how awesome the graphics are compared to your PS2...but after you play it for a while its second nature.

Everyone else comes over and goes,

"Whoa ! These graphics are awesome !"

...but I just go "meh"

Maybe your right...I probably shouldn't complain. Damn with the length of the breaks I take now its no wonder I forget how it feels every time I do it..
 
Yeah I know what you mean with the "losing its magic", the first two times I did it were amazing, and after that it was always less than expected. Until a few weeks ago I did 400mg of molly and magic was definitely found.
 
Big Gigantic said:
Yeah I know what you mean with the "losing its magic", the first two times I did it were amazing, and after that it was always less than expected. Until a few weeks ago I did 400mg of molly and magic was definitely found.
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Yeh but guaranteed you will never feel anything less then a 400mg magic after that...
 
I feel the same way as you. I take MDMA everyone 2-3 months and have fun. This summer though, after being off MDMA for over 8 months, I took it at the beginning of the summer and I was feeling the same euphoria as I did my first roll. Later in the summer I went on an E-binge and took MDMA 9 times in 2 weeks (18 rolls) and I felt like utter shit and couldn't feel anything good about this drug. I'm probably going to roll around Christmas time, but I doubt I'll feel the same effects as I used to.
 
Do you keep your roll experiences novel? That's what we're trying to do. We've gone from our living room one time to a suite on the Vegas strip and in the spring going to drop in Disneyland. So all those rolls will be like "first times" for us because so many other variables will be different.
 
I just want to say that I think avcpl's suggestion is right on...part of the magic is the whole experience, not just the mdma. It can feel a little artificial when you're doing the same thing over and over (rave, etc.), but changing the environment you take it in gives it "newness" because you're experiencing something you've never done before. I've never rolled outside of a rave, but I really like your idea:P.
 
avcpl said:
Do you keep your roll experiences novel?
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Def. agree. New situations can make it more exciting. I know raves have gotten boring for me on E...don't get me wrong I love E, but its just not all that thrilling at a rave anymore.

Maybe this spring ill go on an adventure in a forest or something.

L0L
 
ResinTeeth said:
Just rolled clean pills for the first time in five months, smoked a little bud and it was just like the first time if not better.
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then you took a caffine pill... ive smoked LOTS of weed and little weed with mdma... the mdma overtook the feeling of the weed by far. almost i could say it was a waste... rip on the comedown... it will help put you to sleep...
 
I think your mind just gets used to things after a while. You know what to expect, you know how it feels. That element of surprise is gone. Switch to LSD for a while.
 
jdsinglebarrel said:
I think your mind just gets used to things after a while. You know what to expect, you know how it feels. That element of surprise is gone. Switch to LSD for a while.
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Yeah, try taking a year long break. I think by that point you will have forgotten what exactly MDMA feels like. And trying doing it environment where you would already be very happy, this way the MDMA will boost you further into the clouds, so to speak. :)
 
iNOVA said:
Def. agree. New situations can make it more exciting. I know raves have gotten boring for me on E...don't get me wrong I love E, but its just not all that thrilling at a rave anymore.

Maybe this spring ill go on an adventure in a forest or something.

L0L
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Dooooo eet!!

I stopped using E for almost 2 yrs. When I did it for the first time(again :p) it was incredible. Went on a scenic walk with a friend and it was utterly mind blowing. Was def on par with my first time.

or

Candyflip and go for a bike ride!!! 8o
 
royksopp said:
Perhaps it subjective...maybe we just don't look at things the same after awhile. The element of surprise is perhaps lost.
Click to expand...

I`ve been rolling since 92 and trust me it is not the same! I have eaten extremely good rolls that had newbies rolling on the floor rubbing themselves while I was just like their "o.k.".

I came to grips with the fact that I will never fell like I did those first years ever again. How could you? Your honeymoon is over. What you have to ask yourself is are you still getting something good out of eating pills?If you still enjoy yourself then eat them in moderation and save them for something special.

I have to agree with previous posters about finding new activities for rolling. Maybe you will get those butterflies in your stomach again by anticipating the occassion.

If you decide it is time to quit then I ask that you grab some of the next guranteed fire rolls and store them.Come back in a few years and let the Bluelight community know if you got your magic back from those stored pills.I`m sure everyone one in the future would love to hear about how an old roller dusted off a batch for a comeback roll!
 
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