CentipedeKarma
Bluelighter
LONG, AND RAMBLY, AND OVERSHAREY. BE FUCKING WARNED!!! FEEL FREE TO SKIP/SKIM!!
I am an LDR FREAK. It's the only way I could date growing up, having been... Well, Someone Like Me (LGBT+AUTISM+PSYCHOSIS FREAK!!), Living in the complete fucking BOONIES of New Hampshire.
I started dating Long distance when I was fucking 12. I dated around 20-25 People (JESUS CHRIST) before eventually meeting my current partner, my longest partner I've ever had.
I would meet people on Tumblr, Twitter, DeviantART, etc. I knew they were always my age, also (we would exchange pictures, call, etc. and I can safely confirm I've never accidentally dated a pedo or anything. Fuck.). We'd date over Skype, or DMs of Twitter/Tumblr (depending on their parents), then when Discord started booming, talked on there.
"Why did you Date so many people in 5-6 years?! ONLINE AS A TEENAGER NO LESS!?!??" I'll talk about this if someone asks, but... Growing up traumatized AND autistic AND mentally ill online is and never will be a good experience for ANYONE, EVER!!!
My 2nd Longest relationship was also LDR. It was 8 months. I dated this person from twitter (they/them during relationship, but she detransitioned and uses she/her now AFAIK). It lasted from August 22, 2017 to April 27, 2018. I was 15 thru-out all of this, she was 16 then aged to 17 in March of it.
We met Up at an Anime Convention after I desperately waited 7 months, and it was a SHITSHOW. Her parents were HELICOPTER-ASS fucking Protective as FUCK of her. She was NOT allowed to date online, EVER, or walk around the convention center without one parental unit. I met her dad, and we disguised me as her "Twitter friend who's a boy."
Yea I am Not getting into that whole weekend. What a load of mental illness from me! Haha.
She was my first and only kiss until...
2019, I'm HARDCORE autistically into this cartoon series on YouTube. I join the Discord for the show, and hit it off with everyone, especially... this dude with the cool pointillism art, the guy who draws "gap holes" in his surreal art, traditionally.. I will post 1 example below..
^^ He drew this right before we started dating.
i DO remember commenting on his art in the server like "OMG i'd love to be viewing this on ACID rn!!" MULTIPLE times. Because I had spent that whole summer dropping acid, doing dxm and xanax, etc.
Well.
I have Borderline Personality Disorder.
For a long time, I existed in the Limbo between.. Uh.... Not knowing what i wanted in regards to LOVE, and wanting it SO STRONGLY IT WAS A SEARING PAIN. Let's put it that way!
"Why did you date 20-25 people growing up online?!?!!" Here we go. The BPD. I was so desperate for anything, any semblance of love, attention, ANYTHING, I'd throw myself to teens my age who gave me a REMOTE DROP of fucking... Positive Attention.
He was No Different, However. The Outcome WAS SOOOOOO DIFFERENT!!!
So, how did we start dating?
One day, he asked the server, "Hey If i livestreamed me goofing off, would anyone join?"
I'm also currently in an LSDXM-induced Polyam LDR at this time, with 2 trans guys. I just... spontaneously entered it during a LSDXM trip after they expressed interest in me , and thought it was a . Match. IDK!
Well I was the only one who joined his stream.
He just... goofed off. With his microphone on. He drew art with his mouse in KidPix related to the show we met in the server of, etc.
The wheels turn, something clicks into place, a cog in the ultimate machine of FATE...
I fell for his voice. I had NO IDEA what this dude looked like.
Um. To make a long story short, i fell for him VERY hard. Turns out, he had NEVER had anyone like him like this, EVER. I fell fast because of my BPD, we rushed into the relationship (LIKE EVERY SINGLE ONE I HAD BEFORE HIM!!) But he was. Different.
He cared.
See I'm extremely ... Traumatized. Mentally Ill. Unconventional, weird, niche, OBSCURE. I am a figment, a multi-faceted altered beast, an addict, a term exists? It applies to me. Maybe.
And he was. Not like me. NOTHING like me. Good parents, A+ in school, had real-life friends, had a job, etc. And the kicker? NEUROTYPICAL AS IN, 0 MENTAL ILLNESSES WHATSOEVER.
"Oh boy, this is gonna end in a dumpster fire..." I think to myself.
WRONG!!!
OK. Well, we started dating, November 15, 2019. He tells me He has a crush on me also, and we speed into the relationship like shooting stars.
Ok you know what I'm gonna drop the bomb cuz this story is LONG!!! and im sick of typing:
We met up IRL after 7 months, May 17, 2020, after HUNDREDS of hours worth of VCs, THOUSANDS of texts, etc. 3 Weeks of love, beauty, adoration, and everything nice. The departure HURT horrifically. Jesus christ. Even thinking about it makes me Misty Eyed.
11 More 1-6 week long meetups later from June 2020 to Feb 29, 2024, and then fast-forward to May 2024, and...
I'm here.
I'm here.
Im sitting at his desk typing this up right now. I've slept in the same bed as him since May 21, 2024, the same bed he put together with his 2 hands by himself the day before I flew from NH to AZ, to be here.. Permanently?
And i've never felt better.
ANYWAYS.
YALL tell me YOUR LDR stories if they have a good ending!!! PLEASE... This is NOT a thread to backhandedly be like, "LDRs suck heres why (personal experience I did not specifically ask for here)." I want to hear the GOOD, ONLY!!
and if anyone has uh... any questions about my story? I guess? You can ask!! Sorry I'm on fucking ADDERALL CRAZY MODE RN and thats why this thread exists the end.
I am an LDR FREAK. It's the only way I could date growing up, having been... Well, Someone Like Me (LGBT+AUTISM+PSYCHOSIS FREAK!!), Living in the complete fucking BOONIES of New Hampshire.
I started dating Long distance when I was fucking 12. I dated around 20-25 People (JESUS CHRIST) before eventually meeting my current partner, my longest partner I've ever had.
I would meet people on Tumblr, Twitter, DeviantART, etc. I knew they were always my age, also (we would exchange pictures, call, etc. and I can safely confirm I've never accidentally dated a pedo or anything. Fuck.). We'd date over Skype, or DMs of Twitter/Tumblr (depending on their parents), then when Discord started booming, talked on there.
"Why did you Date so many people in 5-6 years?! ONLINE AS A TEENAGER NO LESS!?!??" I'll talk about this if someone asks, but... Growing up traumatized AND autistic AND mentally ill online is and never will be a good experience for ANYONE, EVER!!!
My 2nd Longest relationship was also LDR. It was 8 months. I dated this person from twitter (they/them during relationship, but she detransitioned and uses she/her now AFAIK). It lasted from August 22, 2017 to April 27, 2018. I was 15 thru-out all of this, she was 16 then aged to 17 in March of it.
We met Up at an Anime Convention after I desperately waited 7 months, and it was a SHITSHOW. Her parents were HELICOPTER-ASS fucking Protective as FUCK of her. She was NOT allowed to date online, EVER, or walk around the convention center without one parental unit. I met her dad, and we disguised me as her "Twitter friend who's a boy."
Yea I am Not getting into that whole weekend. What a load of mental illness from me! Haha.
She was my first and only kiss until...
2019, I'm HARDCORE autistically into this cartoon series on YouTube. I join the Discord for the show, and hit it off with everyone, especially... this dude with the cool pointillism art, the guy who draws "gap holes" in his surreal art, traditionally.. I will post 1 example below..
^^ He drew this right before we started dating.
i DO remember commenting on his art in the server like "OMG i'd love to be viewing this on ACID rn!!" MULTIPLE times. Because I had spent that whole summer dropping acid, doing dxm and xanax, etc.
Well.
I have Borderline Personality Disorder.
For a long time, I existed in the Limbo between.. Uh.... Not knowing what i wanted in regards to LOVE, and wanting it SO STRONGLY IT WAS A SEARING PAIN. Let's put it that way!
"Why did you date 20-25 people growing up online?!?!!" Here we go. The BPD. I was so desperate for anything, any semblance of love, attention, ANYTHING, I'd throw myself to teens my age who gave me a REMOTE DROP of fucking... Positive Attention.
He was No Different, However. The Outcome WAS SOOOOOO DIFFERENT!!!
So, how did we start dating?
One day, he asked the server, "Hey If i livestreamed me goofing off, would anyone join?"
I'm also currently in an LSDXM-induced Polyam LDR at this time, with 2 trans guys. I just... spontaneously entered it during a LSDXM trip after they expressed interest in me , and thought it was a . Match. IDK!
Well I was the only one who joined his stream.
He just... goofed off. With his microphone on. He drew art with his mouse in KidPix related to the show we met in the server of, etc.
The wheels turn, something clicks into place, a cog in the ultimate machine of FATE...
I fell for his voice. I had NO IDEA what this dude looked like.
Um. To make a long story short, i fell for him VERY hard. Turns out, he had NEVER had anyone like him like this, EVER. I fell fast because of my BPD, we rushed into the relationship (LIKE EVERY SINGLE ONE I HAD BEFORE HIM!!) But he was. Different.
He cared.
See I'm extremely ... Traumatized. Mentally Ill. Unconventional, weird, niche, OBSCURE. I am a figment, a multi-faceted altered beast, an addict, a term exists? It applies to me. Maybe.
And he was. Not like me. NOTHING like me. Good parents, A+ in school, had real-life friends, had a job, etc. And the kicker? NEUROTYPICAL AS IN, 0 MENTAL ILLNESSES WHATSOEVER.
"Oh boy, this is gonna end in a dumpster fire..." I think to myself.
WRONG!!!
OK. Well, we started dating, November 15, 2019. He tells me He has a crush on me also, and we speed into the relationship like shooting stars.
Ok you know what I'm gonna drop the bomb cuz this story is LONG!!! and im sick of typing:
We met up IRL after 7 months, May 17, 2020, after HUNDREDS of hours worth of VCs, THOUSANDS of texts, etc. 3 Weeks of love, beauty, adoration, and everything nice. The departure HURT horrifically. Jesus christ. Even thinking about it makes me Misty Eyed.
11 More 1-6 week long meetups later from June 2020 to Feb 29, 2024, and then fast-forward to May 2024, and...
I'm here.
I'm here.
Im sitting at his desk typing this up right now. I've slept in the same bed as him since May 21, 2024, the same bed he put together with his 2 hands by himself the day before I flew from NH to AZ, to be here.. Permanently?
And i've never felt better.
ANYWAYS.
YALL tell me YOUR LDR stories if they have a good ending!!! PLEASE... This is NOT a thread to backhandedly be like, "LDRs suck heres why (personal experience I did not specifically ask for here)." I want to hear the GOOD, ONLY!!
and if anyone has uh... any questions about my story? I guess? You can ask!! Sorry I'm on fucking ADDERALL CRAZY MODE RN and thats why this thread exists the end.
