• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: Senior Staff

So I rekindled with a friend whom I cut off

R

rollsolo

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 20, 2014
Messages
152
Hey all,

So I wrote a thread a while back about being friendzoned by a friend I've known for 5 years plus. We were really good friends up until last year when I polarized and expressed I had feelings for her. She didn't feel the same so I pretty much cut her off and didn't speak nor hang with her for 8 months.

Fast forward to a couple weeks ago I've reached back out to her as I felt what I did was wrong and felt very bitter about the entire situation. We've been chatting via text here and there and she called me once to chat and see how things were. I'm glad I finally reached out as it was bothering me a bit and I decided to be the better man and reconnect. Now I didn't bring up anything about cutting her off of course and do not plan to.

So we setup a time on Saturday at 5:30pm. When I got out the subway she was shouting my name across the street and ran across. We greeted with a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek. We proceeded to walk and talk, practical catch up. She told me she was reader 50 shades of gray somewhere in this conversation but she didn't want to get to deep into it. We ended up heading to grab some tea sitting in one of my favorite cafes.

Afterwards we walked to get dinner and talked and enjoyed each other's company more. I played my touch well as I proceeded across the street leading with my hand on her lower back. She then wrapped her arm in mine and we were walking like that for a while.

Turned out to be a great night and we took the subway separate was back home. I didn't want to push it. I just wanted to see where things were going first as I haven't seen her in 8 months. It seemed like we just have this chemistry where we both just connect so well. I'm still unsure what I want to do. I don't want to destroy our friendship but I also want her. I should probably mention that I'm 31 and she's 41. Not a big deal but some may think otherwise.

She wanted me to join her in her Yoga class which I thought was interesting. She got home and texted me not long ago saying "Made It, Thank you... Safe night talk soon☺️."
 
i think she might enjoy your company as a friend.

i think it is very unlikely that she wants to pursue a romantic relationship with you. (just my intuition based on all your posts)

i think you misread friendliness for romantic affection.

if you want to know where you stand, you need to ask her how she feels, in a clear and direct manner.

i recommend moving on personally (if she just wants to be friends). i have had a strikingly similar experience in the past.
 
Mysterie said:
i think she might enjoy your company as a friend.

i think it is very unlikely that she wants to pursue a romantic relationship with you. (just my intuition based on all your posts)

i think you misread friendliness for romantic affection.

if you want to know where you stand, you need to ask her how she feels, in a clear and direct manner.

i recommend moving on personally (if she just wants to be friends). i have had a strikingly similar experience in the past.
Click to expand...

Being friends is also fine. I think it can be a good way to establishing some kind or romantic relationship. Personally I am seeking other woman and I think she knows that. We're really good friends and when we met up again, things seemed to go back to square one as we enjoyed each others company. I think if I had the opportunity I would sleep with her. She invited me to a Yoga class with her. Not sure which day yet nor if I'm going. I was going to invite her out hiking. I thought it was also strange that she was reading 50 shades of grey and didn't want to talk much about it. She said she didn't like it so far.
 
I think it could go either way. Perhaps she's feeling out the situation. I would suggest hanging out with her more (you seem to enjoy that so keep doing it). Perhaps trying to get into a more romantic situation would be helpful if you would still like to date her. If you just want to be friends then don't lead her on :)
 
rollsolo said:
I didn't want to push it.
Click to expand...

There is nothing to push! She has already told you that she is not interested in you in any way other than a friend. Once you understand that and move forward with this friendship expecting nothing but friendship in return the quicker something may happen.
 
llama112 said:
I think it could go either way. Perhaps she's feeling out the situation. I would suggest hanging out with her more (you seem to enjoy that so keep doing it). Perhaps trying to get into a more romantic situation would be helpful if you would still like to date her. If you just want to be friends then don't lead her on :)
Click to expand...

Yeah that's what I thought. She was very much close to me while walking and we tied arms going down blocks. She also looked deep into my eyes as I shared and conversed with her on interesting things we spoke about in my favorite cafe. It was like old times. I'm just gonna get the feel for things and see what happens. I initially reached back out because I missed her as a friend and was glad that I did reach back as I felt very bitter about what happened.

I just got word that this weekend my friend is throwing a party at his apartment in the city. Do you think it's a good idea to send her an invite? He said I can do a plus 1 or 2. If so how would you go about doing so? Was thinking I'd just shoot her a text later tonight or tomorrow and seeing what her schedule is that day.
 
Bearlove said:
There is nothing to push! She has already told you that she is not interested in you in any way other than a friend. Once you understand that and move forward with this friendship expecting nothing but friendship in return the quicker something may happen.
Click to expand...

Is this a reverse psychology?
 
to me walking with someone with your arms around them when you know they fancy you and you have told them you dont previously is giving them mixed signals.

i'll hug my friends but walking down the road with arm around each other to ME seems like only what i do in a relationship.

dunno, just seems non friend body language to me
 
pofacedhoe said:
to me walking with someone with your arms around them when you know they fancy you and you have told them you dont previously is giving them mixed signals.

i'll hug my friends but walking down the road with arm around each other to ME seems like only what i do in a relationship.

dunno, just seems non friend body language to me
Click to expand...


I know! This is exactly what I thought but friends do this as well which I am aware of. We also used to hold hands a lot. What I did last weekend was lead her across the street when crossing with my hand on her back. Touch her lower back to direct her "This is the way to go" if you will. Also gave massive eye contact. I should mention that she is 41 and I am 31. She has been married before and divorced for about 2 years now. She spent the majority of her life with her ex-husband since she was in college I believe. Personally she might be torn insides still from this.

Anyway, party this weekend! Should I invite her?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top