Splatt
Ex-Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2001
- Messages
- 9,112
Background Information:
I've been using drugs since around 1999. Started with pot, like most do, and did that occasionally until around 2001, where I started to smoke it up a bit. Started doing it daily or near-daily, then a friend told me he can get LSD.. After experiencing LSD for the first time I fell in love with psychedelics, and wanted to know everything about them.
Since I found out about them, and started doing them, mostly in the form of mushrooms and acid, I've never seen them as something to just get high or fucked up on. I knew I was looking for something, an ultimate experience? Some sort of answer? I did not know, I just knew I would find it eventually. But since the start of this year, acid found it's way back to town, and the wet season started for the first time in years. The drought was over, mushrooms are plentiful and I can keep searching for whatever it is I am searching for.
In the last few weeks before this experience, I have been hitting them pretty hard, and I almost lost my reason for doing them. Certain things in my life didn't seem right, I felt depressed with my life in general, things weren't exactly working out for me, and I live with my parents so it can be easy to argue with them, and feel left out of the family. I've even been drinking a fair bit, nearly every night, spending way too much money on booze when I don't even have a job or any work or government income. I knew it had to stop, deep down I knew I was addicted to not being sober. But before I stopped, I just needed the perfect experience, showing me something I've been searching for all these years. Not in any spiritual way, or not just a bunch of pretty flying colours either. Maybe something I knew, burried deep away in my mind, or some sort of answer to something I was looking for. I just knew in the end I would find something.
The report:
I don't have much of an idea on time, as I was not expecting to report this night at all, so I have not included a timeline
15-03-2003
Chemicals used (in order):
1 x "Atoms" blotter of LSD (very weak...)
40 x nitrous oxide bulbs through-out the night.
THC resin
Dried Salvia leaf.
I had planned to go out on this Saturday night, hit the town, I was going to meet a girl I had met during the day at a local RSL club (Our town is pretty small.. not many decent places to go out), and a fair few friends. But realising I didn't have any money, and not really wanting to get drunk yet another night, I decided to stay home and do nothing for once. I remembered I had one blotter of acid left. Even though parents were home, I knew they would crash at about 10, so I decided I'm going to eat the acid at about 8:30 with no plan but to sit around home. Not the greatest plan I know, but I sort of wanted to get rid of it, as I knew it wasn't that strong.
Some first alerts hit me when walking up the road to the shops to buy a lighter. Just a few of those flickers you get, when you notice a light out of the corner of your eye, and a weird feeling in the eyes. Feeling edgy and walking fast, maybe a hint of paranoia, since I had never taken LSD without friends. I couldn't work out the $1.80 for the lighter so I just handed them a bunch of shrap and left the store to walk home. I check my pupils and they are not dilated. I have a nang session and inhale about 6 or so bulbs of nitrous, which did seem a bit different than normal, but did not super charge my tripping like nitrous does on psychedelics.
After about an hour and a half, I was not getting any visuals like warping, shifting or breathing. So i waited longer then had another bulb session. I definitely felt like I was tripping this time, but as the nitrous buzz faded, it kind of dissapeared, and I could still function. After around 3 or more hours after taking it, I knew the acid was very weak. I had 2 Atoms a few weeks ago and that was a decent experience, lasting over 12 hours with lots of warping, shifting, breathing and the other normal LSD visuals. So maybe because I hadn't put these in the freezer yet, they degraded over the 2 or so weeks I had been keeping them in a baggy in a drawer.
I was dissapointed but I tried to make the most out of this experience, trying to force the trip in other words, by inhaling more nitrious while watching some weird music videos. Colours seemed really bright for a while, but that soon faded with the nitrious. I walked outside and did more nitrious. I got one warp out of the corner of my eye while inhaling the contents of 2 bulbs at once. I had around a box of bulbs left, and went inside and wasted time on IRC.
I even felt so desperate to boost this very weak acid, that I scraped marijuana resin from my cone pieces and stems of my bongs, and smoked it. I did feel stoned but I did not feel the acid at all. I then remembered I have salvia left. I had smoked it a few nights earlier, but since I only had matches it was really hard to do it properly and I got a few closed eye visuals and weird feeling from it but that was it. So I get everything together and go outside, since my parents were asleep, and I could drop a bong or something like that. I set up outside, sitting on the grass near my house, one bong, a bowl of dried salvia leaf, 2 cone pieces that I packed both with the salvia leaf and a bottle of water.
I put the first cone piece into the stem of the bong, light it, and inhale the contents while keeping the smoke in, the worst part about smoking salvia is when you're inhaling it, it is hot going down your throat, but it seems tolerable while in your lungs. I exhale as I put the 2nd packed cone piece into the bong, and smoke the contents. I could start to feel it come on.. I pick up the bowl while keeping the smoke in my lungs, and try to pack another cone piece, I was feeling very weird and dizzy, I exhale as I am still having a hard time packing the salvia in. I smoke the salvia once again, and I could feel something come on even stronger.. I knew I would need another cone since I took too long to smoke the 3rd one. But as I am packing the fourth one, the rim of the bowl containing the salvia took on a weird jungle-like, but in a cartoon-like pattern, which started rotating, which brought back a memory of the last time I smoked salvia.. I have no idea if it was a fake memory or not, but I thought this happened last time too.
As I am still having trouble packing the fouth cone, I feel a presence. Some powerful being is observing me, and then it feels like a crowd is also observing me from above. I feel embarrsed that I am clumsy and having trouble packing the salvia into my cone piece. I let out a nervous laugh and a shrug, when a feeling suddenly came over me, that this was serious fucking shit. I felt a memory hit me, like I remember this from when I was young, or another life perhaps, and I HAVE to pack the contents into this fouth cone or I will die. Just like that, somehow, I knew I was going to die if I messed up and I started panicking and telling it "OK! I'm doing it!! Hang on please!" I smoke the contents of the 4th cone, maybe 15-30 seconds after the 3rd one. and as I am inhaling it, I cough and the burning salvia is forced out of the bong with some water as well. I had fucked it up, and somehow I knew someone or something was not happy.
I am pulled back, onto the grass, with what seemed like force. I close my eyes, because something told me I must. I see a giant building of some sort rise in front of me, like if you played the destruction of a building in reverse. I was transported into a long hallway inside this building, where I saw the dark figure of a man in the distance. The man was wearing a hat from what I can remember, but he did not have a face. He was flashing between different colours in this dark hallway, and leading me to follow him. I follow him and I am shown outside of this hallway, what I thought was another room, but it was just darkness.
All of a sudden, a beast rises in front of me. The salvia beast did NOT look happy at all, I knew I was in deep trouble and I was scared for my life. The beast was a jungle green and brown, and had long tentacles and the head of a cobra. The beast was doing something to my mind, I do not know what, but at that moment I thought he was stealing all of my thoughts and memories. I knew I was going to die, and I got an extreme feeling of death. Then, a distant voice that I felt like I had not heard for centuries, my own, told me something inside my head. "This is not real, you took a drug" I had totally forgotten I took the drug, and this was some very serious thing in life, for a moment I actually did believe in some greater being, and that I had upset it with the way I have been living my life. But the though that this is a drug, sunk in a little deeper, and I knew this beast could not harm me, it was all in my head, so for some reason I started cursing at the beast. I called it many names out loud, at around 1am in the morning outside on my lawn, I swore at it calling it a fucking cunt and threatening that I would kill it and it's whole beast family.
Then, it's head popped back, confused. Like I was the only person to ever try to defeat the beast. It did not like this, and it looked very, very pissed off. It was drooling on me, I felt my arms and forehead and there was thick goo all over me. I knew, at that moment, I was going to die. Then I started laughing like the cursing was just as joke, and was not to be taken seriously. It did not care either way and it wanted to kill me. I begged for my life and yelled at the beast, "Please let me live! I want my life!! I love life!!" And my life literally flashed before my eyes. The only emotion I experienced was pure fear of death, nothing else. I started to feel my body decay before the beast was about to strike me, and kill me. I must of had a near death experience. I can't think of any other way to describe it. I was hallucinating to the extreme, but somehow, I jumped up, like I was pulled up by something, then fell over again.
At this stage I had kind of pulled myself out of the experience, knowing I was just tripping. I was still scared of what just happened and was still in a tripping state. I knew the beast was not real and started laughing at what just happened, and also laughing that I am still alive. I laughed with my Ford Cortina at my experience, don't ask me why I thought the Ford could laugh with me, but I literally laughed until I started coughing and feeling weak. Then I went to collect all my drug paraphernalia, and I pick up the bowl of salvia. Some visuals kick back in and I feel something watching me again, and I feel scared. I threw the salvia bowl into my house brick wall, which I forgot was there, and it scatters all over the garden. I snap out of it, and pick up the rest of the stuff I brought outside and took it inside. After the experience I was still very confused, and could not believe what just happened.
Conclusion:
Did I find what I was looking for? I don't know. Maybe I did, but it seems like one of those things you will never find the answer for.. just like life. I had many revelations during nitrous, but then again you don't remember what you found out after the experience
But the main thing was that my brain had seriously had enough of the drug abuse. The salvia beast was just my mind, telling me I've been over-doing it lately, and that forcing trips are not the way to experience or enjoy them. Psychedelics have their own way of telling you that your brain has had enough, and normally it works by scaring the living SHIT out of you.
The next day I felt refreshed, not scattered, panicky or cracked-out. The most important part was I had no need to go and pick mushrooms or get some other psychedelic drug. I haven't used any hard psychedelic since this experience either, and I probably won't for a while. The only thing I've done is smoke weed occasionally and drink every now and then.
This report could also serve as a warning for mixing psychedelics with salvia. Never under estimate the power of salvia, even the dried leaves, it's what has given me my most powerful drug experience yet.
I've been using drugs since around 1999. Started with pot, like most do, and did that occasionally until around 2001, where I started to smoke it up a bit. Started doing it daily or near-daily, then a friend told me he can get LSD.. After experiencing LSD for the first time I fell in love with psychedelics, and wanted to know everything about them.
Since I found out about them, and started doing them, mostly in the form of mushrooms and acid, I've never seen them as something to just get high or fucked up on. I knew I was looking for something, an ultimate experience? Some sort of answer? I did not know, I just knew I would find it eventually. But since the start of this year, acid found it's way back to town, and the wet season started for the first time in years. The drought was over, mushrooms are plentiful and I can keep searching for whatever it is I am searching for.
In the last few weeks before this experience, I have been hitting them pretty hard, and I almost lost my reason for doing them. Certain things in my life didn't seem right, I felt depressed with my life in general, things weren't exactly working out for me, and I live with my parents so it can be easy to argue with them, and feel left out of the family. I've even been drinking a fair bit, nearly every night, spending way too much money on booze when I don't even have a job or any work or government income. I knew it had to stop, deep down I knew I was addicted to not being sober. But before I stopped, I just needed the perfect experience, showing me something I've been searching for all these years. Not in any spiritual way, or not just a bunch of pretty flying colours either. Maybe something I knew, burried deep away in my mind, or some sort of answer to something I was looking for. I just knew in the end I would find something.
The report:
I don't have much of an idea on time, as I was not expecting to report this night at all, so I have not included a timeline
15-03-2003
Chemicals used (in order):
1 x "Atoms" blotter of LSD (very weak...)
40 x nitrous oxide bulbs through-out the night.
THC resin
Dried Salvia leaf.
I had planned to go out on this Saturday night, hit the town, I was going to meet a girl I had met during the day at a local RSL club (Our town is pretty small.. not many decent places to go out), and a fair few friends. But realising I didn't have any money, and not really wanting to get drunk yet another night, I decided to stay home and do nothing for once. I remembered I had one blotter of acid left. Even though parents were home, I knew they would crash at about 10, so I decided I'm going to eat the acid at about 8:30 with no plan but to sit around home. Not the greatest plan I know, but I sort of wanted to get rid of it, as I knew it wasn't that strong.
Some first alerts hit me when walking up the road to the shops to buy a lighter. Just a few of those flickers you get, when you notice a light out of the corner of your eye, and a weird feeling in the eyes. Feeling edgy and walking fast, maybe a hint of paranoia, since I had never taken LSD without friends. I couldn't work out the $1.80 for the lighter so I just handed them a bunch of shrap and left the store to walk home. I check my pupils and they are not dilated. I have a nang session and inhale about 6 or so bulbs of nitrous, which did seem a bit different than normal, but did not super charge my tripping like nitrous does on psychedelics.
After about an hour and a half, I was not getting any visuals like warping, shifting or breathing. So i waited longer then had another bulb session. I definitely felt like I was tripping this time, but as the nitrous buzz faded, it kind of dissapeared, and I could still function. After around 3 or more hours after taking it, I knew the acid was very weak. I had 2 Atoms a few weeks ago and that was a decent experience, lasting over 12 hours with lots of warping, shifting, breathing and the other normal LSD visuals. So maybe because I hadn't put these in the freezer yet, they degraded over the 2 or so weeks I had been keeping them in a baggy in a drawer.
I was dissapointed but I tried to make the most out of this experience, trying to force the trip in other words, by inhaling more nitrious while watching some weird music videos. Colours seemed really bright for a while, but that soon faded with the nitrious. I walked outside and did more nitrious. I got one warp out of the corner of my eye while inhaling the contents of 2 bulbs at once. I had around a box of bulbs left, and went inside and wasted time on IRC.
I even felt so desperate to boost this very weak acid, that I scraped marijuana resin from my cone pieces and stems of my bongs, and smoked it. I did feel stoned but I did not feel the acid at all. I then remembered I have salvia left. I had smoked it a few nights earlier, but since I only had matches it was really hard to do it properly and I got a few closed eye visuals and weird feeling from it but that was it. So I get everything together and go outside, since my parents were asleep, and I could drop a bong or something like that. I set up outside, sitting on the grass near my house, one bong, a bowl of dried salvia leaf, 2 cone pieces that I packed both with the salvia leaf and a bottle of water.
I put the first cone piece into the stem of the bong, light it, and inhale the contents while keeping the smoke in, the worst part about smoking salvia is when you're inhaling it, it is hot going down your throat, but it seems tolerable while in your lungs. I exhale as I put the 2nd packed cone piece into the bong, and smoke the contents. I could start to feel it come on.. I pick up the bowl while keeping the smoke in my lungs, and try to pack another cone piece, I was feeling very weird and dizzy, I exhale as I am still having a hard time packing the salvia in. I smoke the salvia once again, and I could feel something come on even stronger.. I knew I would need another cone since I took too long to smoke the 3rd one. But as I am packing the fourth one, the rim of the bowl containing the salvia took on a weird jungle-like, but in a cartoon-like pattern, which started rotating, which brought back a memory of the last time I smoked salvia.. I have no idea if it was a fake memory or not, but I thought this happened last time too.
As I am still having trouble packing the fouth cone, I feel a presence. Some powerful being is observing me, and then it feels like a crowd is also observing me from above. I feel embarrsed that I am clumsy and having trouble packing the salvia into my cone piece. I let out a nervous laugh and a shrug, when a feeling suddenly came over me, that this was serious fucking shit. I felt a memory hit me, like I remember this from when I was young, or another life perhaps, and I HAVE to pack the contents into this fouth cone or I will die. Just like that, somehow, I knew I was going to die if I messed up and I started panicking and telling it "OK! I'm doing it!! Hang on please!" I smoke the contents of the 4th cone, maybe 15-30 seconds after the 3rd one. and as I am inhaling it, I cough and the burning salvia is forced out of the bong with some water as well. I had fucked it up, and somehow I knew someone or something was not happy.
I am pulled back, onto the grass, with what seemed like force. I close my eyes, because something told me I must. I see a giant building of some sort rise in front of me, like if you played the destruction of a building in reverse. I was transported into a long hallway inside this building, where I saw the dark figure of a man in the distance. The man was wearing a hat from what I can remember, but he did not have a face. He was flashing between different colours in this dark hallway, and leading me to follow him. I follow him and I am shown outside of this hallway, what I thought was another room, but it was just darkness.
All of a sudden, a beast rises in front of me. The salvia beast did NOT look happy at all, I knew I was in deep trouble and I was scared for my life. The beast was a jungle green and brown, and had long tentacles and the head of a cobra. The beast was doing something to my mind, I do not know what, but at that moment I thought he was stealing all of my thoughts and memories. I knew I was going to die, and I got an extreme feeling of death. Then, a distant voice that I felt like I had not heard for centuries, my own, told me something inside my head. "This is not real, you took a drug" I had totally forgotten I took the drug, and this was some very serious thing in life, for a moment I actually did believe in some greater being, and that I had upset it with the way I have been living my life. But the though that this is a drug, sunk in a little deeper, and I knew this beast could not harm me, it was all in my head, so for some reason I started cursing at the beast. I called it many names out loud, at around 1am in the morning outside on my lawn, I swore at it calling it a fucking cunt and threatening that I would kill it and it's whole beast family.
Then, it's head popped back, confused. Like I was the only person to ever try to defeat the beast. It did not like this, and it looked very, very pissed off. It was drooling on me, I felt my arms and forehead and there was thick goo all over me. I knew, at that moment, I was going to die. Then I started laughing like the cursing was just as joke, and was not to be taken seriously. It did not care either way and it wanted to kill me. I begged for my life and yelled at the beast, "Please let me live! I want my life!! I love life!!" And my life literally flashed before my eyes. The only emotion I experienced was pure fear of death, nothing else. I started to feel my body decay before the beast was about to strike me, and kill me. I must of had a near death experience. I can't think of any other way to describe it. I was hallucinating to the extreme, but somehow, I jumped up, like I was pulled up by something, then fell over again.
At this stage I had kind of pulled myself out of the experience, knowing I was just tripping. I was still scared of what just happened and was still in a tripping state. I knew the beast was not real and started laughing at what just happened, and also laughing that I am still alive. I laughed with my Ford Cortina at my experience, don't ask me why I thought the Ford could laugh with me, but I literally laughed until I started coughing and feeling weak. Then I went to collect all my drug paraphernalia, and I pick up the bowl of salvia. Some visuals kick back in and I feel something watching me again, and I feel scared. I threw the salvia bowl into my house brick wall, which I forgot was there, and it scatters all over the garden. I snap out of it, and pick up the rest of the stuff I brought outside and took it inside. After the experience I was still very confused, and could not believe what just happened.
Conclusion:
Did I find what I was looking for? I don't know. Maybe I did, but it seems like one of those things you will never find the answer for.. just like life. I had many revelations during nitrous, but then again you don't remember what you found out after the experience
But the main thing was that my brain had seriously had enough of the drug abuse. The salvia beast was just my mind, telling me I've been over-doing it lately, and that forcing trips are not the way to experience or enjoy them. Psychedelics have their own way of telling you that your brain has had enough, and normally it works by scaring the living SHIT out of you.
The next day I felt refreshed, not scattered, panicky or cracked-out. The most important part was I had no need to go and pick mushrooms or get some other psychedelic drug. I haven't used any hard psychedelic since this experience either, and I probably won't for a while. The only thing I've done is smoke weed occasionally and drink every now and then.
This report could also serve as a warning for mixing psychedelics with salvia. Never under estimate the power of salvia, even the dried leaves, it's what has given me my most powerful drug experience yet.
