CARESS
Bluelighter
I am awake, yet I do not stir.
Vision of my surroundings comes,
Yet the portals of my sight are closed.
I see with my ears and extremities.
They are watching, observing their captive.
For the moment, I am blanketed,
With the cover of utter darkness.
I slowly move my extremities, groping the dark veil.
I hear the hum of power as it seeks,
It's destination in the flourescence.
The brightness is far more blinding,
Than the darkness,
As the veil is lifted.
I rationalize that if I remain perfectly still,
They cannot see me and I will be victorious,
At the art of invisibility.
They fear me, yet I do not fear,
Them or myself.
The room is sterile, I smell the disinfectant.
I muse of how aggressive chemicals can be
Safer than any germ contained in me.
Perhaps they seek to sterilize...my mind instead.
Eyes still closed, I smile at this thought.
They fear me and the thought-spawn of my mind.
So they seek to sterilize me,
Making me more like...them.
I smile at their idiocy.
"Patient X, is something amusing you today?"
The voice is as sterile as this room.
I slowly open my eyes, blinking.
I refuse to answer as this would indicate that I,
Actually care that they have taken the time to speak to me.
The room is as white as I'd imagined it to be.
I am encased in a cloud, white a fluffy.
There are no objects in the room,
Save a mattress in the center of the floor.
My eyes have adjusted and I raise my head,
Scanning the ceiling, finding only the evil lights,
And a vile camera.
I knew you were watching, idiots.
"How do you feel today?" The sterile voice again.
I still do not answer, as I am busy scanning the walls.
I search for escape, but find that there is no door.
It seems I am a captive.
But my incarceration is merely an illusion,
As any control is illusion and folly.
I will use my thoughts as escape.
I close my eyes and remember....
I was far too intelligent, oh yes.
It was easy to disassemble the disposable razor.
I rub the bandages on my wrist, smiling.
Humans are such silly creatures, imagining control in any situation.
They could not control me, mold me, or comfort me.
I saw through their flimsy disguises.
The wolves in caring sheep's clothing..
Seeking to make me in their image.
But I would not conform or be molded.
My mind would fly free and my mouth spoke truths,
Truths they dreaded to hear,
Thoughts they did not understand.
So they sought to contain me, fearing me.
But I decided to enter the higher plain.
I would shed my frail human body,
My own life-giving fluid flowing warm...on the bathroom floor.
So, I was captured, wrapped in white,
Shot full of drugs, and placed in a box.
Much like a present, never to be given.
My capture was a gift to the world...keeping them safe.
Their logic escapes and amuses me.
Was this the answer?
Is this how they could sleep well at night?
Take the non-conformists, lock them away,
Keep the clones safe from renegade free-thinkers.
So I was a bird in a cage, a fish in a bowl,
A body confined, trapped in a room..without a door.
But I had my mind to play with,
My memories to observe like movies.
I had my amusements,
They could never truly contol me.
For how can anyone harness the wind?
Even in a room with no door.
The sterile voice still becons.
Yet is is drowned out by the deafening voices...in my head.
I formulate a plan of escape.
I will tell them what they want to hear in time.
And learn to keep certain thoughts to myself, Avoiding the possibility of future captures.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dark memories from a dark page in the past...
Caress
[This message has been edited by CARESS (edited 16 September 2000).]
Vision of my surroundings comes,
Yet the portals of my sight are closed.
I see with my ears and extremities.
They are watching, observing their captive.
For the moment, I am blanketed,
With the cover of utter darkness.
I slowly move my extremities, groping the dark veil.
I hear the hum of power as it seeks,
It's destination in the flourescence.
The brightness is far more blinding,
Than the darkness,
As the veil is lifted.
I rationalize that if I remain perfectly still,
They cannot see me and I will be victorious,
At the art of invisibility.
They fear me, yet I do not fear,
Them or myself.
The room is sterile, I smell the disinfectant.
I muse of how aggressive chemicals can be
Safer than any germ contained in me.
Perhaps they seek to sterilize...my mind instead.
Eyes still closed, I smile at this thought.
They fear me and the thought-spawn of my mind.
So they seek to sterilize me,
Making me more like...them.
I smile at their idiocy.
"Patient X, is something amusing you today?"
The voice is as sterile as this room.
I slowly open my eyes, blinking.
I refuse to answer as this would indicate that I,
Actually care that they have taken the time to speak to me.
The room is as white as I'd imagined it to be.
I am encased in a cloud, white a fluffy.
There are no objects in the room,
Save a mattress in the center of the floor.
My eyes have adjusted and I raise my head,
Scanning the ceiling, finding only the evil lights,
And a vile camera.
I knew you were watching, idiots.
"How do you feel today?" The sterile voice again.
I still do not answer, as I am busy scanning the walls.
I search for escape, but find that there is no door.
It seems I am a captive.
But my incarceration is merely an illusion,
As any control is illusion and folly.
I will use my thoughts as escape.
I close my eyes and remember....
I was far too intelligent, oh yes.
It was easy to disassemble the disposable razor.
I rub the bandages on my wrist, smiling.
Humans are such silly creatures, imagining control in any situation.
They could not control me, mold me, or comfort me.
I saw through their flimsy disguises.
The wolves in caring sheep's clothing..
Seeking to make me in their image.
But I would not conform or be molded.
My mind would fly free and my mouth spoke truths,
Truths they dreaded to hear,
Thoughts they did not understand.
So they sought to contain me, fearing me.
But I decided to enter the higher plain.
I would shed my frail human body,
My own life-giving fluid flowing warm...on the bathroom floor.
So, I was captured, wrapped in white,
Shot full of drugs, and placed in a box.
Much like a present, never to be given.
My capture was a gift to the world...keeping them safe.
Their logic escapes and amuses me.
Was this the answer?
Is this how they could sleep well at night?
Take the non-conformists, lock them away,
Keep the clones safe from renegade free-thinkers.
So I was a bird in a cage, a fish in a bowl,
A body confined, trapped in a room..without a door.
But I had my mind to play with,
My memories to observe like movies.
I had my amusements,
They could never truly contol me.
For how can anyone harness the wind?
Even in a room with no door.
The sterile voice still becons.
Yet is is drowned out by the deafening voices...in my head.
I formulate a plan of escape.
I will tell them what they want to hear in time.
And learn to keep certain thoughts to myself, Avoiding the possibility of future captures.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dark memories from a dark page in the past...
Caress
[This message has been edited by CARESS (edited 16 September 2000).]
