This is my first post, so i'll give a quick briefing of who i am what I've done throughout my years of addiction. It started when i was 15 years old, i was in a car accident and had hurt my back, though there was no permanent injury's, i had back pain that kept me from sleeping and made my life miserable for quite a while.
I probably didn't need that first script of percocets, but being young and stupid, i did my best to manipulate the docs into giving me a script by lying and being a sneaky bastard that i was. I probably could have went without them, but for one reason or the other, i took them for around 2 1/2 months straight without a missed day.
In that period of time i grew to love them, and wen combined with pot, i felt like a million dollars, as many of us did. Well they ran out eventually, and i woke up one day feeling like crap thinking i maybe had the flu, it was my first taste of withdrawls, and though it was only percs, i was scared to death of the thought of sweating it out, so i came upon some 60mg morphine sulfates, and proceeded to eat them which of course cured me that day.
That wouldn't be the last time i had taken morphine, in fact it was the first day, in a series of 6 years or so that would take me through hell and misery, that would ultimately destroy my life. for around 6 years i went from percs, to taking 200-300 mg's of morphine, along with however many droppers full of liquid Oxy i could get my hands on. I seemed to have a never ending supply due to certain circumstances. I managed to make it many years without having to deal with more then one day of withdrawals, but eventually my supply ran low or out altogether, and i found my self living a life that had my going without my pills 3-4 days a week on average for another 2 years.
throughout half a decade i of course had many different pain killers or opiates, but i usually had what i needed, so there was no need to buy dope or other pills etc etc. I finally went to a detox and then got on methadone for a little over a year. The meth was nice, but destroyed me even further physically and mentally, so i chose to go off it without tapering from 100mg a day, which many of you know is far from fun, and in my opinion, the worst possible drug to just go off of cold turkey. I felt like shiit for a good month before i went one day without chills, sweats, RL RL RL RL, back pains and every other evil symptom included. But it wasn't long before i started back up again, and for the next year i took whatever opiate i could get my hands on including suboxone for times when i couldn't afford anything else.
I finally hit rock bottom for the i don't know? 5th time maybe, thought i would try buying a weeks worth of suboxone, i would try a quick taper that looked good on paper, but would it work? Well it did work in a sense that this time around, i was going off of opiates that all had short half lives, which was Dilaudid, Small morphines like 15mg/60mg, and of course heroin. I took the Subs for 7 days, i took 4mg each day until i ran out, and of course on the 8th day without the past opiates, i felt fine, and the next day i felt fine as well, so it had worked, or so i thought.
It may have helped me avoid withdrawals, but not even days later a friend called me, like they always do, saying he had this that and the other thing, and i couldn't resist.
I probably didn't need that first script of percocets, but being young and stupid, i did my best to manipulate the docs into giving me a script by lying and being a sneaky bastard that i was. I probably could have went without them, but for one reason or the other, i took them for around 2 1/2 months straight without a missed day.
In that period of time i grew to love them, and wen combined with pot, i felt like a million dollars, as many of us did. Well they ran out eventually, and i woke up one day feeling like crap thinking i maybe had the flu, it was my first taste of withdrawls, and though it was only percs, i was scared to death of the thought of sweating it out, so i came upon some 60mg morphine sulfates, and proceeded to eat them which of course cured me that day.
That wouldn't be the last time i had taken morphine, in fact it was the first day, in a series of 6 years or so that would take me through hell and misery, that would ultimately destroy my life. for around 6 years i went from percs, to taking 200-300 mg's of morphine, along with however many droppers full of liquid Oxy i could get my hands on. I seemed to have a never ending supply due to certain circumstances. I managed to make it many years without having to deal with more then one day of withdrawals, but eventually my supply ran low or out altogether, and i found my self living a life that had my going without my pills 3-4 days a week on average for another 2 years.
throughout half a decade i of course had many different pain killers or opiates, but i usually had what i needed, so there was no need to buy dope or other pills etc etc. I finally went to a detox and then got on methadone for a little over a year. The meth was nice, but destroyed me even further physically and mentally, so i chose to go off it without tapering from 100mg a day, which many of you know is far from fun, and in my opinion, the worst possible drug to just go off of cold turkey. I felt like shiit for a good month before i went one day without chills, sweats, RL RL RL RL, back pains and every other evil symptom included. But it wasn't long before i started back up again, and for the next year i took whatever opiate i could get my hands on including suboxone for times when i couldn't afford anything else.
I finally hit rock bottom for the i don't know? 5th time maybe, thought i would try buying a weeks worth of suboxone, i would try a quick taper that looked good on paper, but would it work? Well it did work in a sense that this time around, i was going off of opiates that all had short half lives, which was Dilaudid, Small morphines like 15mg/60mg, and of course heroin. I took the Subs for 7 days, i took 4mg each day until i ran out, and of course on the 8th day without the past opiates, i felt fine, and the next day i felt fine as well, so it had worked, or so i thought.
It may have helped me avoid withdrawals, but not even days later a friend called me, like they always do, saying he had this that and the other thing, and i couldn't resist.
.