I've been on methadone for 10 months. Just found out i got Prego visiting my long distance bf. he's clean now as we'll but I'm scared if I go back to him n keep the baby he will fall off again n I will b stuck. In reality I'm the one who has has the bigger problem quitting but I know this baby will b a game changer for me. Using wont b an option, wich is scary in itself. Even scarier to know if he falls off I can't go with him this time. I love him so much but I have so many doubts. My initial joy has turned to terror. . I'm scared, confused, he wants thus.... But for how long n do I? Plus is methadone really ok for the baby like they say??? Any advice wld b nice. Not sure if its just the jitters or intuition. I know I will feel horrible having an abortion. Ugh wtf to do ?!??
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SLR Moderators: Senior Staff
Pregnant, on methadone, scared n confused :/
- Thread starter Alikat
- Start date
Nicsdragon
Bluelighter
I feel for you sweetie. How old are you ? My girlfriend is 5 months prego and she though she would. Be able to quit using opiates when she first found out. Well not only hasn't she been able to quit she been lying to her husband about being clean. She's in a terrible spot and she cries everyday. She finally went to an addiction dr last week and he gave her 1 xanex a day! She's freaking out and know she has absolutely everything to lose having her baby born addicted and everyone finding out. I know this is a little diff from your issue but if you aren't in a good place in your life and feel you don't have anyone that will help you raise a baby then terminating the pregnancy is your only true REALISTIC option. I feel every woman has the right to choose and I know you wants everything to be wonderful for you and your baby but if your bf is only going to cause you heartache then you know what you have to do ;(. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this and your in my prayers.
teological
Bluelighter
Don't listen to this drongo above ^^. He is saying that you have a choice but then pushing abortion, wtf.
Look, where there is a will there is a way! People have been through worse things and survived. You can do it. Tell you boyfriend, make a pact and attempt to give this child a good life. You said yourself that you will not use, it will not even be an option. That is responsible and to me sounds like deep down you want this child.
Also, you said yourself that you would feel horrible aborting your baby...so why do it?
Look, where there is a will there is a way! People have been through worse things and survived. You can do it. Tell you boyfriend, make a pact and attempt to give this child a good life. You said yourself that you will not use, it will not even be an option. That is responsible and to me sounds like deep down you want this child.
Also, you said yourself that you would feel horrible aborting your baby...so why do it?
I know I would not be OK with fathering a baby where the mom was on methadone during the pregnancy.
Fuck no. That would be unacceptable.
You need to the research, and decide. I have never googled this or talked to doctors. I can tell you that you will probably see a range of information. Much of that information will be based on comparing elicit(street) opioid use to methadone use. Some of that information will be biased from the perspective of drug companies and the treatment industry wishing to profit. Some of that information will be biased from the perspective of anti-abortion lobbies who don't consider abortion an option, and don't trust you to get off drugs during your pregnancy.
They will tell you that its OK. If you are interested in sorting past the propaganda, look at various opioids like heroin, "oxycontin abuse" etc and how google says they affect the fetus and pregnancy. Look up whether or not heroin gets into the blood and system of the fetus through the placenta and umbilical cord. Those will not have the same propaganda of a profitable industry to distort what you are being told.
If you do decide to keep the baby, when you get off drugs, you need to go to a good hospital and do it in-patient. You can plan a reasonable taper and do the worst part in-patient. That way, the stress of the withdrawals will not hurt your baby.
Good luck.
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Thanks everyone 
I have looked into it a lot and have been assured staying on methadone is a must as withdrawal wld cause a miscarriage 
I already have 2 beautiful girls with my x husband 9, and 6 yrs old. I am 29. My bf assures me he wants this more than anything I'm just so scared! I feel as tho ill b trapped by another baby. I've been wanting a better more productive sober life and now that I have a real chance, all Ivan think about is having a wild life full if partying and shooting heroin. Is that in reality what I want? Prob not... But once the options gone its a fixation... Grass is always greener I suppose.
I've also already had 2 abortions in the past with my x husband, so I know I can't do that again. If I go home I will have plenty of help from my family with the baby. Right now I'm cross country as I ran away from my life n addiction. I need to face them ... I think it's time to go home regardless
I have looked into it a lot and have been assured staying on methadone is a must as withdrawal wld cause a miscarriage I already have 2 beautiful girls with my x husband 9, and 6 yrs old. I am 29. My bf assures me he wants this more than anything I'm just so scared! I feel as tho ill b trapped by another baby. I've been wanting a better more productive sober life and now that I have a real chance, all Ivan think about is having a wild life full if partying and shooting heroin. Is that in reality what I want? Prob not... But once the options gone its a fixation... Grass is always greener I suppose. I've also already had 2 abortions in the past with my x husband, so I know I can't do that again. If I go home I will have plenty of help from my family with the baby. Right now I'm cross country as I ran away from my life n addiction. I need to face them ... I think it's time to go home regardless
Pretty sure I'm having this baby, if all goes to hell theirs always adoption. I'm just scared n the degree of change it will have on my life is finally setting in... Thanks for all the support guys. I will keep everyone updated on my progress n failures n adventures 
Side note I'm in GA, n needing to get back to AK ... With my car, how in the hell can I pull off a cross country trip Prego on methadone??? My world is full of crazy times!
Side note I'm in GA, n needing to get back to AK ... With my car, how in the hell can I pull off a cross country trip Prego on methadone??? My world is full of crazy times!
Corazon, I've been struggling with the decision to quit or stay on too. Thanks for the advice. Inpatient with constant monitoring wld be best bet for getting off. Thanks again
Does anyone know anyone who has had a baby on methadone??? Any comments as to baby's health n mental state??
Does anyone know anyone who has had a baby on methadone??? Any comments as to baby's health n mental state??
Its extremely dangerous to try and detox when pregnant and NOT at all in the best interest of the baby!!!
Listen....
If you could choose, if you could say "Hey, now is a great time to have a baby, i will intentionally get pregnant" then hell yea, you might want to get off methadone BEFORE getting prego.
But once youre already pregnant, its too fucking late! You have to stay on that shit.
And let me tell you something, there is SOOOOOOOO much misinformation and straight up garbage lies out there about methadone and pregnancy.
METHADONE IS NOT TERATOGENIC.
It has been the gold standard for a long time for a reason. It has been EXTENSIVELY studied for use during pregnancy and does not cause birth defects. It is safe!
I was on methadone when I got pregnant with my son and he had no issues whatsoever. Not even every baby born to a mother who is on it will be dependent! Some dont even have any withdrawal at all!
I was on 90mg the entire time , my son didnt even need to be detoxed with medication or anything. He was in the hospital for only 2 extra days longer than the standard of 3 days that they keep the babies in the hospital i was at. The only reason he stayed longer was because he had a slight fever (like, 2 degrees above normal.)
Also, I must make a suggestion for you...Please consider breastfeeding...Not going into a discussion of breastfeeding in general --I am talking about SPECIFICALLY as a benefit to methadone mothers and babies. clinical research shows that it eases symptoms of NAS (neonatal absintence syndrome) for babies who are experiencing them and helps them get out of the hospital sooner.
I am someone who does endless research on everything that is relevant to me when I am involved in something. I spend hundreds of hours reading and reading and educating myself all thru out my pregnancy. I learned a LOT, and if you have ANY questions at all PLEEEAAASE feel free to PM me! i would love to ease any concerns u may have!
Dont let ANYONE make you feel like less of a person, or a mother, for being on methadone and choosing to have this baby. You are not harming your baby, you are not a bad person, you have nothing to be ashamed of. People want to say "oh, you would have a baby on methadone?" Whats the alternative, aborting it? What would harm the baby more, do you think? 8( Derp.
Listen, like I said. Do you want to be on methadone for a planned pregnancy, if you had all the ideal things in place? Maybe not. I guess it would really depend on the situation. But once you are on it, and you find out youre pregnant, its a done deal. Getting off is not a safe option.
What i have found is that usually the people who want to get off it, they aint considering the BABYS own good. Theyre considering THEIR OWN fears of being judged, and ignorant peoples views on the topic. They think , oh, i wanna get off methadone becuz I dont wanna "Have a baby on drugs" . As if having a baby while stabilized on a safe, monitored dose of a non-teratogenic drug that does not cause birth defects or any significant damage to development, is the same as "being 'ON DRUGS' " like out there shooting dope or whatever. But yea, people get these ideas in their heads, and then, even though they are told by doctors and all the research out there, that staying ON is THE only reasonable option, they still have this 'conscience' in their head telling them its "bad", and they want to get off, I think, to look better to other people, or to themselves. Like, THEY feel "bad" about it, and they dont want to feel bad, so they think, oh , i should detox, because it makes me feel guilty and i dont like feeling guilty and i dont like being judged. But thats selfish. Im sorry, but it is. You shouldnt put your baby at risk to make yourself better, so you can give yourself a pat on the back for not having a baby "addicted to teh drugz!" if you take away all the ideas and prejudices and stereotypes and what the fuck ever else about this subject, and just look at the bare , bottom line medical facts, the best thing for the baby is to stay on it, so dont let no jackass, judgemental idiots tell you otherwise.
Anyways, I could write a whole damn book on this subject so I aint gonna do that here, but if you have any questions ask away in this thread and id be happy to try and help or like I said just hit me up in a PM, either or both, whatever, I know what it was like to go thru this and came out of it with a better outcome than i had ever ever imagined, with a happy, healthy, beautiful son who had no issues whatsoever, with all the nurses commenting on how healthy he was and how well i had taken care of myself during the pregnancy, etc. So fuck all the people who just dont get it.
BTW, I had a natural delivery as well. Thats the thing that cracks me up....people will give you shit for the methadone...then they go and get epidurals and fucking dilaudid injections and shit like that during labor....lol...(And dont buy the whole "epidurals dont affect the baby" thing because they do, but thats another story for another thread.) Just wanted to say...dont let hypocrites and uneducated, uninformed, and straight up malicious hateful judgemental people try to make you feel less for making the rigiht choice that you have to make.
Listen....
If you could choose, if you could say "Hey, now is a great time to have a baby, i will intentionally get pregnant" then hell yea, you might want to get off methadone BEFORE getting prego.
But once youre already pregnant, its too fucking late! You have to stay on that shit.
And let me tell you something, there is SOOOOOOOO much misinformation and straight up garbage lies out there about methadone and pregnancy.
METHADONE IS NOT TERATOGENIC.
It has been the gold standard for a long time for a reason. It has been EXTENSIVELY studied for use during pregnancy and does not cause birth defects. It is safe!
I was on methadone when I got pregnant with my son and he had no issues whatsoever. Not even every baby born to a mother who is on it will be dependent! Some dont even have any withdrawal at all!
I was on 90mg the entire time , my son didnt even need to be detoxed with medication or anything. He was in the hospital for only 2 extra days longer than the standard of 3 days that they keep the babies in the hospital i was at. The only reason he stayed longer was because he had a slight fever (like, 2 degrees above normal.)
Also, I must make a suggestion for you...Please consider breastfeeding...Not going into a discussion of breastfeeding in general --I am talking about SPECIFICALLY as a benefit to methadone mothers and babies. clinical research shows that it eases symptoms of NAS (neonatal absintence syndrome) for babies who are experiencing them and helps them get out of the hospital sooner.
I am someone who does endless research on everything that is relevant to me when I am involved in something. I spend hundreds of hours reading and reading and educating myself all thru out my pregnancy. I learned a LOT, and if you have ANY questions at all PLEEEAAASE feel free to PM me! i would love to ease any concerns u may have!
Dont let ANYONE make you feel like less of a person, or a mother, for being on methadone and choosing to have this baby. You are not harming your baby, you are not a bad person, you have nothing to be ashamed of. People want to say "oh, you would have a baby on methadone?" Whats the alternative, aborting it? What would harm the baby more, do you think? 8( Derp.
Listen, like I said. Do you want to be on methadone for a planned pregnancy, if you had all the ideal things in place? Maybe not. I guess it would really depend on the situation. But once you are on it, and you find out youre pregnant, its a done deal. Getting off is not a safe option.
What i have found is that usually the people who want to get off it, they aint considering the BABYS own good. Theyre considering THEIR OWN fears of being judged, and ignorant peoples views on the topic. They think , oh, i wanna get off methadone becuz I dont wanna "Have a baby on drugs" . As if having a baby while stabilized on a safe, monitored dose of a non-teratogenic drug that does not cause birth defects or any significant damage to development, is the same as "being 'ON DRUGS' " like out there shooting dope or whatever. But yea, people get these ideas in their heads, and then, even though they are told by doctors and all the research out there, that staying ON is THE only reasonable option, they still have this 'conscience' in their head telling them its "bad", and they want to get off, I think, to look better to other people, or to themselves. Like, THEY feel "bad" about it, and they dont want to feel bad, so they think, oh , i should detox, because it makes me feel guilty and i dont like feeling guilty and i dont like being judged. But thats selfish. Im sorry, but it is. You shouldnt put your baby at risk to make yourself better, so you can give yourself a pat on the back for not having a baby "addicted to teh drugz!" if you take away all the ideas and prejudices and stereotypes and what the fuck ever else about this subject, and just look at the bare , bottom line medical facts, the best thing for the baby is to stay on it, so dont let no jackass, judgemental idiots tell you otherwise.
Anyways, I could write a whole damn book on this subject so I aint gonna do that here, but if you have any questions ask away in this thread and id be happy to try and help or like I said just hit me up in a PM, either or both, whatever, I know what it was like to go thru this and came out of it with a better outcome than i had ever ever imagined, with a happy, healthy, beautiful son who had no issues whatsoever, with all the nurses commenting on how healthy he was and how well i had taken care of myself during the pregnancy, etc. So fuck all the people who just dont get it.
BTW, I had a natural delivery as well. Thats the thing that cracks me up....people will give you shit for the methadone...then they go and get epidurals and fucking dilaudid injections and shit like that during labor....lol...(And dont buy the whole "epidurals dont affect the baby" thing because they do, but thats another story for another thread.) Just wanted to say...dont let hypocrites and uneducated, uninformed, and straight up malicious hateful judgemental people try to make you feel less for making the rigiht choice that you have to make.
I was on methadone for the 2nd month when I was pregnant. It made my morning sickness even worse, I could barely keep any liquid or food down my first trimester. I kicked by the 3rd month. If I can do it, you damn sure can do it. It's not easy. Being pregnant and especially being under stress will make a person want to use more than ever jus to escape having to plan your life... I can't lie, it was hard as hell to do.
My son came out on time and weighed 7.3. No extra time at the hospital. They brought him right to me after they ran the vision/hearing/standard tests. Thank whatever God that he came out healthy. Only time will tell. He's only a little over a year now and he's healthy so far. I wouldn't recommend using methadone during your entire pregnancy. Try and taper and eventually stop. 9 months really isn't that long. That baby will be here before you know it. That guilt will eat you up as well. Knowing what you're doing to your unborn baby. I still feel guilty to this day about using anything while I was pregnant with my lil man. If he has asthma when he's 13 or something, I'm gon feel guilty. Being a Mom makes you think about somebody other than yourself. Your baby needs a stable environment so try and get your life together the best you can cuz you won't have time to focus on yourself with a newborn.
Another thing. If you and your bf are not married or getting married, chances are you will be raising this baby by yourself. Nobody wants to think that, nobody wants to be a baby mama but that shit happens more often than not. I'm not trying to scare you and I apologize if I'm being negative. Make sure you have some kind of support system to help you with that baby. Babies are needy. They need all of you all of the time when they are fresh out (newborn). Taking a shower can be a major project some days so try and get a family member or close friend on board. Me and my baby father were together for 4 yrs, engaged, living together and dude still wouldn't do basic shit like change diapers. Still doesn't. A lot of guys will get excited about a baby on the way but it's more for show. They don't wanna be labeled as a deadbeat. They want ppl to see them as father of the year. it's very easy for them to turn it on and off. I'm sure there are lots of truly great fathers out there (manboychef) and I hope that your bf is one of those. Jus want you to be prepared sister.
Like I said, my son is a little over a year old now. If you have pregnancy questions or baby questions in general or jus need somebody to talk to --->PM me if you like. Would love to talk to you.
My son came out on time and weighed 7.3. No extra time at the hospital. They brought him right to me after they ran the vision/hearing/standard tests. Thank whatever God that he came out healthy. Only time will tell. He's only a little over a year now and he's healthy so far. I wouldn't recommend using methadone during your entire pregnancy. Try and taper and eventually stop. 9 months really isn't that long. That baby will be here before you know it. That guilt will eat you up as well. Knowing what you're doing to your unborn baby. I still feel guilty to this day about using anything while I was pregnant with my lil man. If he has asthma when he's 13 or something, I'm gon feel guilty. Being a Mom makes you think about somebody other than yourself. Your baby needs a stable environment so try and get your life together the best you can cuz you won't have time to focus on yourself with a newborn.
Another thing. If you and your bf are not married or getting married, chances are you will be raising this baby by yourself. Nobody wants to think that, nobody wants to be a baby mama but that shit happens more often than not. I'm not trying to scare you and I apologize if I'm being negative. Make sure you have some kind of support system to help you with that baby. Babies are needy. They need all of you all of the time when they are fresh out (newborn). Taking a shower can be a major project some days so try and get a family member or close friend on board. Me and my baby father were together for 4 yrs, engaged, living together and dude still wouldn't do basic shit like change diapers. Still doesn't. A lot of guys will get excited about a baby on the way but it's more for show. They don't wanna be labeled as a deadbeat. They want ppl to see them as father of the year. it's very easy for them to turn it on and off. I'm sure there are lots of truly great fathers out there (manboychef) and I hope that your bf is one of those. Jus want you to be prepared sister.
Like I said, my son is a little over a year old now. If you have pregnancy questions or baby questions in general or jus need somebody to talk to --->PM me if you like. Would love to talk to you.
Thank you sooo much Kadijah n MsPhilly!!! Like I said I've had an anortion before n it was horrible I do want this baby, it's just confusing. Me n the dad have been thru hell n back ( heroin addiction) and right now he's in Alaska n I'm in GA... Just called the only 2 methadone clinics in AK and cried for hours because they will NOT transfer my care! Even tho I am a life long resident and pregnant! I know if I am not there with my bf it's pretty much over... N why wld anyone want a long distance Prego relationship? He's so happy n I haven't told him about the clinics yet... They said if I can get a few weeks worth of meds n my AK ID back they will PROBABLY have to take me cuz of the pregnancy... But wtf happens if they can't??? I get sick as hell ? Spontaneously miscarriage ?? Shoot dope? What a shitty bunch of options! When this is all said n done I want nothing more in life than to open a clinic in AK. State full of junkies and only 2 clinics wich can only take 100 patients each?!? Beyond fuked , 2 year wait list is y I came to GA in the first place. Wish I never did I shld have ruffed out the withdrawal but it had just never worked for me before. I can't take another thing being my fault in this relationship! Why does life have to be so complicated! ?! Can't love just conquer all?!?
Anyways, thanks for all the love n support ladies
Happy 4th of July
I do want this baby, it's just confusing. Me n the dad have been thru hell n back ( heroin addiction) and right now he's in Alaska n I'm in GA... Just called the only 2 methadone clinics in AK and cried for hours because they will NOT transfer my care! Even tho I am a life long resident and pregnant! I know if I am not there with my bf it's pretty much over... N why wld anyone want a long distance Prego relationship? He's so happy n I haven't told him about the clinics yet... They said if I can get a few weeks worth of meds n my AK ID back they will PROBABLY have to take me cuz of the pregnancy... But wtf happens if they can't??? I get sick as hell ? Spontaneously miscarriage ?? Shoot dope? What a shitty bunch of options! When this is all said n done I want nothing more in life than to open a clinic in AK. State full of junkies and only 2 clinics wich can only take 100 patients each?!? Beyond fuked , 2 year wait list is y I came to GA in the first place. Wish I never did I shld have ruffed out the withdrawal but it had just never worked for me before. I can't take another thing being my fault in this relationship! Why does life have to be so complicated! ?! Can't love just conquer all?!? Anyways, thanks for all the love n support ladies
Happy 4th of July 
Pagey
Bluelight Crew
Hey Alikat, I'm sorry you're put in that situation. Methadone & pregnancy must not be the greatest combo
If you don't want an abortion at all, it's simple, don't have an abortion. I really don't think there's any need to develop any more than that, it's really all there is to it. Don't if you don't want to. It sounds like you really want this child and that's the first step to being a great mom.
Have you spoken to your boyfriend about your concerns regarding him potentially relapsing? I think that would be the best thing to do to gauge the situation here. Of course neither of you can predict if either of you will relapse at some point, but hearing his thoughts on the matter coudl still give you a pretty good idea on where he stands right now. In any case I wish you the best of luck
If you don't want an abortion at all, it's simple, don't have an abortion. I really don't think there's any need to develop any more than that, it's really all there is to it. Don't if you don't want to. It sounds like you really want this child and that's the first step to being a great mom.
Have you spoken to your boyfriend about your concerns regarding him potentially relapsing? I think that would be the best thing to do to gauge the situation here. Of course neither of you can predict if either of you will relapse at some point, but hearing his thoughts on the matter coudl still give you a pretty good idea on where he stands right now. In any case I wish you the best of luck
First, congrats on being pregnant!
Life will always be complicated sister. Unfortunately having a baby only heightens whatever personal issues you have so try your best to sort thru what you got going on before that baby come out. I would recommend tapering the best you can. If you can't quit completely, try and try to get on the lowest dose possible. That baby is your life now. I know you want the best for he/she. Do not jus do cold turkey cuz you can actually have a miscarriage that way. So you do have to continue your MMT but I cannot stress enough how important it is to get off that shit gradually. You know what's best for you, your body so don't go too hard and put that baby into shock.
Love can't really conquer anything in the real world. Love is only a feeling. Love does NOT pay the bills. I think we all know that. Love also doesn't make an ok relationship turn into a storybook romance. Love really ain't shit honestly. When you have your baby, you will understand true love. No other love can compare to it. It's an amazing experience to be a mother.
Lastly, stay positive. Find a way to relax every day. If you find yourself in a constant state of stress or anxiety, you have to cut some shit out your life. No bueno for the unborn baby. They can feel your emotions trust and believe that. And don't worry so much. You will get it together before the baby come. You can only do what you can do, you dig? Don't try to do it all cuz it's impossible. Focus on you and your baby's health. Save money. Buy diapers, baby wipes, bottles, clothes, shoes, bibs, receiving blankets, swaddling blankets, formula (in case your baby won't breast feed or you don't produce enough milk), etc. Buy as much as you can before your baby come cuz you won't have a lot of time to go shopping when they are newborn. Try to get somebody to throw you a baby shower and you can a lot of shit that way.
Keep us posted with your health and baby's health as your pregnancy progresses. If you are gon have a boy, def PM me or post something. I have a BUNCH of newborn-12 month clothes, socks, hats, winter/summer stuff, bibs, bottles, breast pump, baby nail clippers, etc. I can send it to you via USPS. I have no use for my son's stuff he's outgrown or doesn't use. I also have toys that he's grown out of as well. So like I said, keep us posted and I'm sure I'm not the only one that will be able to help you out.
Sticky Green
Bluelighter
How good of a mother would you say you are for your 2 daughters right now?
Do they get all the love and support that they need already?
How would adding another child into this equation affect their well being?
Do they get all the love and support that they need already?
How would adding another child into this equation affect their well being?
pofacedhoe
Bluelight Crew
my logic is this- all drugs affect the brain of the developing foetus. if you can quit it will be traumatic BUT it will be better for the baby.
i highly doubt opiates would damage the baby the way alcohol would but who knows? the real worry i would have would be that years later when the child is older and a doctor gives them codeine that they would be hugely predisposed to addiction.
on a side note one of my friends drank a bit during pregancy(really bad for your baby and well documented as such)/did a lot of coke and her boy is lovely (not exactly top of the class but then neither is my friend so thats not really the point).
apparently withdrawal is dangerous during pregnancy
i highly doubt opiates would damage the baby the way alcohol would but who knows? the real worry i would have would be that years later when the child is older and a doctor gives them codeine that they would be hugely predisposed to addiction.
on a side note one of my friends drank a bit during pregancy(really bad for your baby and well documented as such)/did a lot of coke and her boy is lovely (not exactly top of the class but then neither is my friend so thats not really the point).
apparently withdrawal is dangerous during pregnancy
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