Peak Sadness

[Elliven]

This is something I have noticed, wondering if anyone else had similar feelings:
When I am at the height of my peak, and me and all my friends(both old, and the people I have met on the night) are smiling and laughing and dancing and chatting etc. I get kinda sad. Not emotionally, but more intellectually I guess. As in I find it a sad thought that the only way to get to this sort of intimacy with people --some of whom are strangers-- is to take drugs.
I doubt you all agree with me, but you cannot seriously tell me that just cruising down the street you would make 10-20 new friends just by smiling. And you certainly wouldn't hug a stranger on the train, just because they were looking glum.
hrmm, well thats what I find anyway--it passes pretty quickly as I get caught back up in the music or whatever, but I find I think about it at least once every time I roll...
.. And this isn't even a come-down post See you all at GC..

 

[Tiptronic]

*nod* or at the end of the night when you go back to people you met on the night, they may tend not to be as friendly as they were...but you know..

 

[tray]

heh,
I know exactly what u are talkin bout...
Moments of Clarity Suk
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tray--->
If you find love, Love with every substance of your being

 

[dangermouse]

the one thing that ecstasy does for me is make me realise that everybody in the world wants to know as many other souls as they can. when you easily make 10/20 friends under the friendly guise of ecstasy, you feel that *this* is how it should be...
..and you're right. we just got our priorities fucked up a long time ago with power structures such as religions/governments etc. run by people unfortunate enough to ever have the moments of understanding that we have.

 

[KaTz]

yea.. i can relate to that...
when you are having the time of your life, u wonder to yourself why ordinary life is so dull and sad compared to peaking... and why ppl cant be nice to each other all the time.
and why this period of bliss has to start and end by taking xtc. what else is there to life that can compare ???
hmmm, am i thinking too much when im on E ??
any1 else ??

rambles rambles rambles
the juice of the mind flows.

 

[mellow_dee]

yuhs...the sadness is definetlly there.
when i egg, it always crossed my mind that in a few hours, the sun wiill come up, and the friends you have made during the night will become normal ppl again, they will once again go back to their own lifes and yo most probably wont see them again until the next party. and the unity of the night will end.
intimacy when you roll, i think doesnt bring real friendshiiip. it is all because everyone is feeling the love ( from the pill ) . when you sober up you'll probably discover that you really dont have anything in common etc etc..
in some cases...real freind ship developes and that is great but a great percentage of ppl you meet wil not even think of you a few days after the party and that really saddens me = (
anyway ......end of rant. I love esctasy and thats just my thoughts on that sub..
mel.

 

[j_swift]

i hate the transience of the experience.
when i'm on e it makes me realise how good life is if ppl were open, friendly and generous to each other.
i kinda try to be more like my e'ing personality when i'm straight...i think even though e'ing is temporary it's real and very positive. u just have to make the most of the time
btw tiptronic why are you sad, you got some lovin

 

[flip]

Agree but we are only human aren't we ! Considerring we have spent the last couple of millenia running around slaughtering each other in huge quantaties we aren't doing to bad.
Yes things are different when you comedown, but we have been given a glimpse of the way things should be and what we should do is strive to bring back some of that empathy for our fellow humans and incorparate it into our everyday lives .
We may not run around and hug strangers on a train but an increased respect love and compassion for our fellow humans can only be a good thing. In the way LSD subtly changed society and the way it views itself so I think will MDMA. Don't expect an unachievable utopia just a slight shift in the right direction.
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flip
[This message has been edited by flip (edited 24 April 2000).]

 

[Starfucker]

Or even waiting in line, people aren't as friendly cause they're not rolling yet... so we should all learn from this and *try* to be friendlier in real life.
you are *never* thinking too much.

 

[Leprechaun]

In reply to the original post, think about this.
If you went to a rave straight, I assure you that you may meet many new friends if you go and chat with people!

It is not the drugs that create the atmosphere, although it may intially. It is the culture that is generated by the drugs that where initially taken. Once you accept the rave culture for what it is, there are certain inhibition that you gain and loose when within the confines that of that culture. In main stream society we build a different set of inhibitions. For instance you would not sit down at a Cafe, and begin to chat to someone sitting on a table reading a news paper. Whereas I could imagine just sitting down at a rave where ever and having a bit of a laugh about a few things and a bit of a chat. What drugs do is aswell as give you confidence they loose memory associations of negative experiences in attempts at interaction during childhood. But once you become aware of what inhibitions are lost on drugs, you can do the same things while not on drugs.
The best party I ever went to was when I was straigh!

Anyway, don't feel sad that you can only open up to poeple on drugs. I find it sad that the initial ideal of Rave is being mixed and changed now as Rave is flowing into the less passionate view of raving of mainstream.
The culture of Rave so much more extraordinary and sublime then the other cultures that exist in Melbourne, so much so I have made myself really sensitive to other groups. Most of whom seem to hold little respect to the people that exist in that culture. Yet, one of the reasons that ravers can become closer, is being able to contrast the friendliness and honesty of rave to other less appealing groups.
OK! I hope that is enough dribble for today from me!

Everyone, after having seen first hand offshore, PLEASE BELIEVE ME! WE HAVE IT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Smurf]

Basically it is adulthood that is the restriction. People have gathered so many negative experiences and develop sub-concious fears that hold them back.
Go for a walk dow by the beach...if you see a kid playing ball, say "G'day Champ" I promise you they will respond all chirpy like. Kids arent as subconcious as adults.
As for partying at a club etc, it can be kinda disheartening. Im often chatting away in the line before we get in. Some respond, some just nod as if to say "let me drop one then we can be friends". The most annoying thing for me is to chat/connect with someone inside the club, only for them to run a mile when down/outside. Thats simply a waste of time.
In saying that I have made some really good friends in a very short space of time. E can knock down the barriers and inhibitions very quickly. Some are hit and miss. But at the end of the day I believe quality people stand out.
I have this amazing habit of rarely forgetting a face - particularly whilst rolling. Last night I met this guy I met on 9 Oct 1999. And another guy from December. The first guy was like "yeah what", the second was very friendly and chatted all night long.
As for having a chat at a cafe...I probably wouldn't have done it 12 months ago. But then I travelled around Europe on my own for 6 months. There is something about being away from your natural environment that will bring you out of your shell. So now after travelling and taking E I just say bugger it, Ill just pretend Im on something and chat away.

 

[Space Frog]

Elliven
u mentioned how u find the experience of gaining and losing intimacy with strangers as saddening - consider it from this angle:
i have become SOOO much closer with 2 of my friends all b/c we have been out and shared the same drug experience. whilst i think its sad that it has required e for us to gain this sort of intimacy (although u could argue that we would eventually have become close), i am grateful that we have had these experiences and that it has brought us closer.
thats my 2 cents anyway!