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Passiveness while rolling

C8H10N4O2

C8H10N4O2

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 4, 2010
Messages
448
Because if the neurotransmitter activity caused by MDMA, rolling gives you that "everything is A-OK" feeling. It's great, but since I am a very passive person to begin with, this usually causes issues when rolling with friends or my significant other. I find myself agreeing with every decision made by the people I am with, even if they totally contradict my own needs or wants.

For example, when I want to get up and dance (or NEED to if there was amphetamine or a lot of caffeine in the pills), if someone suggests we sit and talk instead, I will agree without hesitation. Then we'll end up sitting for 3 hours, with me unable to concentrate on a single word and shaking my legs uncontrollably.

This sort of thing will happen throughout the roll, and as soon as I start coming down, I will begin to feel progressively more irritated because I realize I didn't really get to do a lot of the things I wanted to. When this has happened, it made for a shitty comedown, and a bit of resentment for the people who did get their way. This is NOT how I ever want to feel after having a night of bonding and fun.

Does anyone else have this problem? How can I do a better job of getting my way (at least sometimes) while rolling, specifically with people who tend to have strong opinions? Should I just find less bossy friends :P
 
I had a similar experience at my first rave a few days ago. I become very protective of and empathetic towards my friends and I wanted everyone to be together (though I know now that is an unrealistic expectation at a rave). The result was that I spent more time trying to care for and keep tabs on my friends than trying to have a good time. I still had fun and wasn't resentful, but I know where you're coming from.

My advice would be to talk to your friends about this before you roll again. Let them know how you feel about these kinds of situations. Also, try and go into your next roll with the idea that YOU are gonna have yourself a good time. When you assert the desire to dance, you may be surprised with how compliant your friends will be. Remember that they're more likely to follow you as well. Sometimes I timidly request of suggest something thinking it will be rejected only to find acceptance and encouragement. So just reach out, the e will make them want to make you happy too, just like how it makes you super accommodating.
 
gqn said:
I had a similar experience at my first rave a few days ago. I become very protective of and empathetic towards my friends and I wanted everyone to be together (though I know now that is an unrealistic expectation at a rave). The result was that I spent more time trying to care for and keep tabs on my friends than trying to have a good time. I still had fun and wasn't resentful, but I know where you're coming from.

My advice would be to talk to your friends about this before you roll again. Let them know how you feel about these kinds of situations. Also, try and go into your next roll with the idea that YOU are gonna have yourself a good time. When you assert the desire to dance, you may be surprised with how compliant your friends will be. Remember that they're more likely to follow you as well. Sometimes I timidly request of suggest something thinking it will be rejected only to find acceptance and encouragement. So just reach out, the e will make them want to make you happy too, just like how it makes you super accommodating.
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yea stick the shoe on the other foot. i always do. see how it fits. usually its the same on both sides. unless u got weird feet. then ur just a freak.
 
^haha?

If you want to do something and your friends want to do another just say to yourself 'what the fuck? why not?' and just do what you want to do. If your friends want to sit and you want to dance, then just dance. If your afraid of losing your friends just dance near them or somewhere where you can see them. If you make sure your happy then the high will be a lot better for you and all your friends.
 
Just like you, I too have that problem. At raves, I ALWAYS end up missing the DJs I REALLY wanna hear. However, last Sunday I promised myself I wouldn't miss out on the DJs I wanted to, and I didn't, and I had a fucking blast! Hell, I even managed to get back stage and meet one of them :D!
 
Yeah, I think one or two times something like this happened, although if the MDMA is good I am usually feeling too good too care too much. I don't know, I sometimes feel like this when I am not rolling. :/
 
I get like this a lot too. I have one friend who likes to just sit the whole time (or more like, her legs don't work at all so she HAS to sit) and another who's always bouncing around dancing and stuff. I always feel like I need to be sitting with my friend, or dancing with my other friend and I get INCREDIBLY indecisive when I roll so this makes a sort of conflict for me that I just can't make my mind up for.

My solution: I've found that when I roll separately with these people I have a better time. My dancing friend and I will go to events more often, just the two of us, and have a blast. My sitting friend will usually come to house parties where cuddling and talking with everyone is much more comfortable and works better for me.

Or just tell your friends how you feel. Tell them you need them to encourage you when you want to dance. If you're so receptive to what they tell you to do, then them telling you to get up and dance should work fine. If you need to, make a big stink about it ("You guys HAVE to tell me to go dance. You HAVE to.") that way when they're rolling they'll remember to tell you.
 
MD Specialist said:
If your friends want to sit and you want to dance, then just dance. If your afraid of losing your friends just dance near them or somewhere where you can see them. If you make sure your happy then the high will be a lot better for you and all your friends.
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this.

You also have to remember that if they're rolling as well, they'll be more likely to agree with you, lol. If they're really set on chilling out, I'm sure they wouldn't hold it against you to go dance for 20min or something, just be sure not to get lost~
 
Dude when I'm rolling I do what ever I want , I don't let anyone kill my high. That's why I don't like rolling in groups just 1 on 1 you can never go wrong
 
gqn said:
I had a similar experience at my first rave a few days ago. I become very protective of and empathetic towards my friends and I wanted everyone to be together (though I know now that is an unrealistic expectation at a rave). The result was that I spent more time trying to care for and keep tabs on my friends than trying to have a good time. I still had fun and wasn't resentful, but I know where you're coming from.

My advice would be to talk to your friends about this before you roll again. Let them know how you feel about these kinds of situations. Also, try and go into your next roll with the idea that YOU are gonna have yourself a good time. When you assert the desire to dance, you may be surprised with how compliant your friends will be. Remember that they're more likely to follow you as well. Sometimes I timidly request of suggest something thinking it will be rejected only to find acceptance and encouragement. So just reach out, the e will make them want to make you happy too, just like how it makes you super accommodating.
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pun intended? lol
 
Thanks for the replies. I'm going to bring it up beforehand next time, probably along the lines of "Hey, I'm looking forward to doing A and B tonight, when it's time I'll let you guys know," and I will remember what you all said about remembering to do what I want to.

It's not really a huge issue, in fact, I normally really enjoy whatever we end up doing at events. Especially when I'm with a group, I really enjoy making sure everyone is having a good time. It's just been a couple of times where I ended up missing out on something.

DiZzyBonne said:
Just like you, I too have that problem. At raves, I ALWAYS end up missing the DJs I REALLY wanna hear. However, last Sunday I promised myself I wouldn't miss out on the DJs I wanted to, and I didn't, and I had a fucking blast! Hell, I even managed to get back stage and meet one of them :D!
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This has happened to me. Nowadays I make a point to memorize timeslots, and if there's a REALLY important DJ there, I'll set an alarm on my phone a few minutes before their set.
 
Monkeybizness said:
Dude when I'm rolling I do what ever I want , I don't let anyone kill my high. That's why I don't like rolling in groups just 1 on 1 you can never go wrong
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Exactly! When I go to raves, I ALWAYS go MIA from my group. It's just I'd rather meet new people than kick it with the people I see every day.
 
you're making too big a deal out of it man. if you wanna dance and they wanna chill, then just dance. you don't have to squeeze your way to the front of the stage, you can dance wherever. dance right by them if you dont wanna be separated. you can't really dance near the stage anyways with a million bodies pushing and shoving. =p

you're friends arent gonna mind or be upset if you don't wanna follow their every footstep trust me.
 
Personally I think mdma is amazing for some of the passive things it opens you up. This is part of the gift of mdma. You should go with the flow. If you just want to jump around why use mdma?
 
jam uh weezy said:
you're friends arent gonna mind or be upset if you don't wanna follow their every footstep trust me.
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Friends, no. They shouldn't be a problem with all your help. Boyfriend is another story. I'm hoping the preemptive discussion next time will help him realize that disagreeing with his decisions isn't to be taken personally, it's because I was looking forward to doing something and want to do it right then....
 
Really your friends shouldn't care if you wanted to get up and dance. I think you should just go for it. When im rolling i always always split from the group and do my own thing, although i do give a ton of light shows i just love meeting new people and doing my own thing sometimes. I always meet up with them again later and it is always soo good to see them again lol.
 
I find that I enjoy public rolling either by myself or with a couple trusted friends, but oddly enough, not my SO... I can't stand to roll in public with her, mainly cause all that happens is I end up babysitting (she has a history of making Really Bad Choices™). rolling alone at home is the only way I can enjoy myself with her.
 
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