margolik
Greenlighter
A little background... I've been using Oxy on and off, with long bouts of regular use, for over 3 years. I got clean, much in part to a relocation and a suboxone taper, and stayed clean for 6 months. About a year ago, I got hooked again, and was snorting 80-160mg/day. I used for about 8 months, then got on suboxone, taking 2-3mg/day for about 4 months. I tapered down to <1mg, and jumped off. After about day 4, I foolishly got more OC, and have been in this back and forth battle with Oxy and Suboxone for the last month. I've been doing 20-40mg/day of OC, and when I can find them, 1-2mg of suboxone for about a week.
My girl just caught me last night, grinding up some oxy. She was unaware of my habit (thought i'd been clean for the last year), but knew of my previous addiction. I've been going to NA for a few months, trying to find some way of beating this stupid shit that keeps me from enjoying life like I used to.
So after flushing my last 40mg oxy down the toilet last night, my last dose was yesterday ~ 26 hours ago. I took about 1mg of suboxone an hour ago, but that's all I have left, and it really hasn't helped me feel much better.
I'm looking at going cold turkey here, and from what I've read, I'm about to have 5-7 days of mild to moderate withdraw. I'm considering taking a weeks unpaid leave from work, and just toughing this out. It's my only option at this point, as the money is gone, and I'm pretty sure my girl is going to be as well. I'm not going to let that send me back into a spiral though... Getting high is only going to make things worse. Sure i'll ignore this pain for 4-5 hours when I snort something, but then it will still be there, and I'll just be delaying my withdraw.
I'm going to use this thread to post my progress... Any suggestions are welcome - but please, do not suggest I take any pills like tramadol or benzos... I have no access to that.
So here goes.
My girl just caught me last night, grinding up some oxy. She was unaware of my habit (thought i'd been clean for the last year), but knew of my previous addiction. I've been going to NA for a few months, trying to find some way of beating this stupid shit that keeps me from enjoying life like I used to.
So after flushing my last 40mg oxy down the toilet last night, my last dose was yesterday ~ 26 hours ago. I took about 1mg of suboxone an hour ago, but that's all I have left, and it really hasn't helped me feel much better.
I'm looking at going cold turkey here, and from what I've read, I'm about to have 5-7 days of mild to moderate withdraw. I'm considering taking a weeks unpaid leave from work, and just toughing this out. It's my only option at this point, as the money is gone, and I'm pretty sure my girl is going to be as well. I'm not going to let that send me back into a spiral though... Getting high is only going to make things worse. Sure i'll ignore this pain for 4-5 hours when I snort something, but then it will still be there, and I'll just be delaying my withdraw.
I'm going to use this thread to post my progress... Any suggestions are welcome - but please, do not suggest I take any pills like tramadol or benzos... I have no access to that.
So here goes.
