Now its my rodeo - I need help

[whippa craka]

Hey all,

I have been a part of this forum for many, many years. Ever since before I was of legal age I was on this forum, and gained lots of knowledge. It is a great resource. By the time I got to college I thought I was a know-it-all when it came to any form of addiction, and all sorts of drugs. (at the time all I did was smoke marijuana and chew tobacco, I was an ass, I still am).

2 years ago a friend introduced me to heroin. I had experience with opiates (hydro and oxycodone), generally 30mg oxycodone oral or intranasal and it was PLENTY for me, any nicotine and I would throw up.
I started out as a weekend warrior, sniffing bags. Eventually my friend convinced me to IV. I proceeded to IV about 25 times over the course of 10 weeks, if I had to guess, as a weekend warrior, shooting up 1-3x a friday or saturday night with him. I felt the drug gripping me each weekend more and more and I stopped -- my friend however, did not. We all know where he ended (or didn't), and is still dealing with heroin issues. I was able to shoot up heroin and stop. It took 6 months before I could think about the drug without any interference or shivers (if you know what I mean). This is what scares me about the position I am in now.

Two years went by and very little opiates were used, nowhere near the point of any mental or physical addiction....and then they introduced heroin again.

I started using and didn't stop. I sniffed bags for about 2 months, it quickly got to a point where I had to use to feel normal. This problem is continuing to this day. I used 8mg of a suboxone strip once during this whole debut, and I was able to make it last 4 days while on vacation (barely) to feel normal. As my money started to run out, I started to IV. I have now been IV'ing for about 2-3 months, obviously my addiction is much worse.

It is 4am right now and I last shot up around 10 hours ago. I feel sober and am starting to get irritable. I lost my web developer job this past Thursday, partly due to me being asleep at my desk on Wednesday 8). Needless to say, NOW is the time I need to stop. Now that I have no job to worry about, I am planning to cold turkey. I havn't been able to get anywhere close to sober for more then 30 hours the past 4-5 months without needing to stop anything I was doing and find a way to feel normal.

• At around 18 hours my eyes start to water like a fountain and I non-stop yawn
• I am very irritable
• I feel like shit
• I feel like I am buried in sand or, I am wearing a 300lb suit of skin and it is hard to move. The lethargy is overwhelming.

I plan to try to sleep tonight and tackle tomorrow cold turkey.
Can I please get some help from my very friendly, knowledgeable and experienced bluelighters to help me get through this. I hope that with all of your advice, I can do this. Thank you all in advance. I need any advice I can get.

 

[szuko000]

There is a wealth of knowledge on Bluelight in regards tto this. There are plenty of methods for lessening the symptoms of withdrawal and will make it more doable then going C/T. I am tempted to move this to sober living or the recovery section however, I know someone with more time then I will chime in with one of the many ways to make this easier on you. Loperamide is an over the count diarrhea aide that is an opioid and will help, I would start by researching that.

You can also benefit from a rapid sub detox or some other clinic recovery program, they do work and often people need a network to get clean. This is just a start and as stated i am refraining from transferring it to recovery as we get more traffic here and someone will give you some help here just a bit quicker. Other mods feel free to move it if thats deemed better!

 

[pillman1224]

google phreex guide to narcotic withdrawl. ive said this 3x in the past week to people.

 

[whippa craka]

Will do. Right now I am about 24 hours in and I am really starting to feel it. I took a half of a 8mg suboxone and it didnt touch it. I'm just going to try to ride this out, no more suboxone, it hardly helped and I already took half so I plan to just proceed through w/d. This really blows. Who know 2-3bags IV a day would suck so much.

EDIT: After reading the guide here: http://www.bluelight.org/vb/threads/32895-*MERGED*-Guide-to-narcotic-withdrawal
I took 6mg loperamide and 500mg naproxen just now @ 5pm on day 1. He seems to think loperamide helps a ton, I will let you guys know -- because I will definitely be able to feel the difference. He said it helped with morphine withdrawal in monkeys just as much as methadone, interesting.

I think I may have access to kratom in town as well! I have heard kratom saved people during w/d's. Can anybody agree? I have taken Kratom before, if I can stomach it (its gross), i am sure it will help more then anything.
Come to think of it, I think it should be more highly recommended, or is it too addictive?

EDIT: 20 minutes after taking loperamide there is a definite noticeable difference. WOW. I doubt it is placebo, I am feeling better by the minute.

 

[whippa craka]

@ 7pm it has been 110 minutes since I took 10mg loperamide. The feeling of relief is almost euphoria in itself. Still not 100%, but close!

 

[pillman1224]

the creator of that guide is no longer with us unfortunately. but i am glad i could help.

 

[whippa craka]

This is hour 96. I still have some suboxone left and am going strong. Day 1 I took half suboxone... day 2 1/4, day 3 1/8 and now I just took 1/16 for day 4 and have 1/16 suboxone left for day 5. Good taper?

 

[wezface]

It's a very quick taper, and you're probably still going to suffer noticeably. I'd almost say fuck the suboxone and stick to the loperamide taper if it's working that well for you.