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Mental Health My therapist dropped me as a patient yesterday.

  • Thread starter Thread starter cj
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cj

cj

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Yeah i guess theres a first time for everything. This guy was recommended by the head of the local mental hospital. I went there to try and get help with the PTSD I have from being repeatedly molested as a child. After 3 visits yesterday was the 4th he told me he couldn't help me because I'm on methadone maintenance and I smoke weed. He recommended I go to inpatient rehab to get off methadone and he referred me to an addictions counselor to try and push me in that direction I guess. The frustrating part is that when I first started seeing him I told him that rehab was not an option on the table. He still decided to take my money 3 more times before he decided to drop me.

I am really discouraged. I knew methadone had a nasty stigma but I had no idea it was this bad. I have run into one road block after another trying to get help for my problems. I guess what I am going to do is just not tell future therapists about my drug use. Because I really feel like I can benefit from therapy for the past sexual abuse.

Has anyone else had this happen to them? Any advice or experince would be appreciated. I'm really bummed about the whole thing. Methadone has made my life a lot better in the short term I have been on it. I have no plans to come off anytime soon.
 
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I am so angry about this my head feels like it is going to explode--what the hell kind of schmuck goes into being a therapist that cannot handle someone self medicating (quite rationally I might add) to deal with the pain, not to mention PTSD, of having been molested as a kid? Someone should pull that idiot's license. CJ, I can't even quite believe I am reading this in 2015. I do know that way back when my son was 15, I could not find a psychiatrist willing to treat a "dual diagnosis" and they all used the excuse that it was too difficult to know what were symptoms and what were drug-related behaviors or experiences. They all advised me to put him in treatment for drug abuse and then seek mental health treatment. At least where I live, this has changed in the mental health system, but I guess that isn't everywhere.

I would suggest sending that guy a copy of Gabor Mate's book In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts. (Get a used marked up copy on amazon so you don't have to spend much;)) Sign it, "From someone that you refused to help".

I simply cannot tolerate the ignorance and outright blindness that exists in what passes for therapeutic care in this country. Thanks to the War on Drugs mentality, even people that go to school for psychology come out with complete ignorance when it comes to drugs. I bet this same guy would not have batted an eye if you said you were on an AD or benzo or both.

Try not to get discouraged and keep looking. Are there any support groups where you are for survivors of childhood sexual abuse? That may be a good resource because you may meet someone else that has a good therapist.

BTW, if you have not read In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts, I would recommend it. Also, The Courage to Heal might be a good resource.

Hang in there, friend. You made a great decision to go on maintenance and it is working for you right now. Hold your head up and know that the ignorance out there is just that: a lack of knowledge. What a sick society we have that calls people experts (and rewards them!) that often are ignorant of such basic knowledge.
 
i wouldn't want a therapist who was too scared to see me.... you need a bonafide psychiatrist ... i think thats probably why he dropped you
 
Herbavore- haha I like that book idea! I already wrote a nasty but honest review about him on yelp so at least maybe someone in my position in the future knows to avoid him. Almost every therapist I have seen has used that exact same excuse they gave you about it being too hard to tell of the symptoms are from drug use or other illnesses. And if I was using 12 different drug everyday and showing up loaded to the appointments I would say he had a point but that wasnt the case. I take methadone and smoke a small amount of weed at night most days. I have gotten down to a quarter ounce a month of weed. But like the other poster said i guess I'm better off finding someone who really wants to treat me. That's a good idea to try and find a support group I haven't ever heard of any but I am going to ask around and see what I can find.

This journey has really opened up my eyes to just how much stigma there really is concerning addiction. These are the people whos job it is to help heal addicts. It really makes you wonder how many people commit suicide or intentionally OD after enough of these negative experiences. I guarantee you if I wasn't on methadone I would have gone and gotten super loaded on heroin yesterday. As much as I am trying to let it roll off my back it really does feel like he kicked me in the stomach. But I realize all I can do is move on. As always I appreciate the kind response.
 
Well another thing that I would be tempted to do, both for my own sanity and to let him know the effects of what he did, would be to write out exactly how that made you feel. Does he refuse to treat shopaholics, people with gambling addictions or sex addictions? Does he refuse to treat them even when they say they have taken measures to help themselves already? This is why it really made me angry--because like you say, you weren't coming in loaded, you were trying to deal with things and wanted more help and guidance and he would not have said that had your addiction been to something other than a substance; in fact I bet he would not have said that if the substance were alcohol. The only thing I can see that is a silver lining here is, thank heavens you didn't invest a lot of time and money into this guy's "expertise". I really hope that you can find someone a thousand leagues above this guy.

The reason I say that I would write it out for my own sanity is that often writing is a great way to let go of something like this in a positive way (so it doesn't go on eating at you) while not just letting it go as if it didn't mean anything (because it did, and rightfully so).
 
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I am so very sorry to hear of this. I've been dropped before in my 20's by a therapist that studied under Jung, highly recommended. My recent therapist I am doing emdr with asked me if I am on methadone now (I'm not but I could be and was for a while). It seems they can't take one into rapid eye movement while on mmt or something. I would indeed be annoyed…

Doctors don't understand the difference between maintenance and other addictive drugs… ime.
One class they take I hear about addiction. lol. Not enough
 
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My counselor at the methadone clinic was really mad after I told him about what happened. He is going to help me file a formal complaint with the state licensing board against the guy. I doubt it will matter but maybe he will at least think twice before doing something like this to another person. My feeling about the situation has turned from shame and emberassment to anger and defiance. I am going to stand up for myself and make a fuss. Even if nothing changes at least I can say I tried.
 
crimsonjunk said:
My counselor at the methadone clinic was really mad after I told him about what happened. He is going to help me file a formal complaint with the state licensing board against the guy. I doubt it will matter but maybe he will at least think twice before doing something like this to another person. My feeling about the situation has turned from shame and emberassment to anger and defiance. I am going to stand up for myself and make a fuss. Even if nothing changes at least I can say I tried.
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I was going to mention the same thing. There are definitely more options than 'Yelp!'. Insurance companies have policies in place to check and balance dr's like these. In the insurance world they are called 'grievances' and they MUST be followed up on by the doctors office, the insurance company, everything. And if one office/dr gets enough they can get some serious consequences handed down to them. As in the form of a malpractice lawsuit and losing their license.

(My mother is a very passionate behavioral/mental health director for a very VERY common insurance company. She deals with these everyday. And OHHHHH you better watch out when she is filling one for me! lol).
 
crimsonjunk said:
My counselor at the methadone clinic was really mad after I told him about what happened. He is going to help me file a formal complaint with the state licensing board against the guy. I doubt it will matter but maybe he will at least think twice before doing something like this to another person. My feeling about the situation has turned from shame and emberassment to anger and defiance. I am going to stand up for myself and make a fuss. Even if nothing changes at least I can say I tried.
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That fucker was way out of line and if he did that here he could very well be brought before the medical board. Methadone is a well established excepted treatment for addiction thus he has no right to treat you like that. So yes i would definitely say you have a case for sure.

I have found that evoking the word lawyer tends to make doctors go abit pale so even if your not going to do that it's fun to see them almost shit themselves over it :)
 
I appreciate everyone's support. I mentioned the situation to my counselor at the methadone clinic. He set me up with a counselor that he knows is more educated about my lifestyle.

Its been a couple weeks so i have calmed down about it. I guess what really pisses me off is that UAB hospital referred me to this asshole. Saying he was the best and brightest. Fucking assholes. But that is Alabama for you. Lots of ignorant people here.
 
ROLL TIDE!!!

It touches my heart to read the words of support. I totally AGREE. Some "doctors" feel that they are Gods in white coats...NOT!?!

I've had doctors disrespect me to the point that I'd like to rip off their heads and SHIT down their throats. Yea, I have rage issues. :! Years of failed diagnosis/treatment/surgeries changed the trajectory of my entire life. Assholes, indeed.

Hold your head up high and continue to seek the help you deserve.
 
Shocked and speechless! I can't imagine all the negative feelings you had to experience and process as a result of his insensitivity. I'm glad you've found another therapist and getting better everyday. I am on Suboxone, and several times I have felt "judged" by medical professionals. I also run into a lot of medical office staff who don't even know what Suboxone is.
 
Yeah it's really shit. This new doctors office hasn't been much better honestly. They cancelled my appointment with no explanation after making me wait another month to see the doctor. Then when I called to make a new one they are making me wait another 3 weeks. "the doctor is very busy" well fuck him I'm in pain here bitch is what I wanted to say. I bit my tongue. Gotta play the game as my old therapist used to say. I totally see why people go on rampages with firearms after going through the mental health roller coaster. It's a system that is underfunded yet expensive, overly sensitive to drug seeking yet clueless about addiction. I'm so ready to give up. If it wasn't for my poor mom man I would have said fuck this a while ago.
 
It made me very sad to read your story about your therapist dropping you. I had many bad experiences with therapists and psychiatrists, however, none ever said I couldn't be helped in my current state. One time though I overslept and missed my meeting, I called the woman to apologise immediately as I woke up, perhaps 30 minutes past the time of my meeting, but she was so impolite and completely lacked understanding for my situation that I never saw her again, obviously she was thinking about the money she lost. She had a private office, you would think she had to succeed in her career to have one, but no, she lacked basic abilities of an amateur therapist. Quite often I felt like my meetings with therapists were going nowhere, they had no idea what they were doing and I could literally feel their hopelessness. I often wondered where all those people satisfied with their therapy were finding good therapists. Either I was a hopeless case or I just didn't have luck of finding a good therapist. As I look back, I can't wrap my head around the fact that not a single therapist could at least point me into the right direction, give me a hint what I could do on my own to help myself. It took me years to get out of the misery by myself, I'm sure I wasn't an easy patient to begin with, very unwilling to take in someone's bullshit, but at the same time I doubt I was really so stubborn that I would reject interesting innovative ideas.

Perhaps there is some fairness in telling a patient that you can't help them when you feel you can't, but that also depends on the way it's done. At the same time imagine yourself doing something that you love, would you not accept new challenges to become better? Would you not be fully immersed in it? I don't know how the health system works like in the US, but anyway, I think novice therapists should get extensive training in their profession under the guidance of a much more experienced therapist before they can start their own business. I guess it's all wrong no matter where you go. There are many professions which are basically all about money, well, a good therapist should be all about people. When I do stuff I love doing, I'm not thinking about how much money I could get for it, well unless I don't have money for food or my other basic needs, I am simply consumed by the moment I'm in. Sadly, this whole world is all about money, when it's about money, it's certainly not about what you can give to other people, but rather how much you can still scoop up. For every successful person there will always be tens of unsuccessful people using all their power to just survive.

In a situation like this, I guess you always have to start with yourself, you have to think why you'd want to change your life and yourself for better for yourself and not other people no matter how close they might be to you. You're like the basic point of reference for yourself, if you keep trying to make people around you happy, and you might even succeed for some time, but without being happy yourself, sooner or later you will reverse to the beginning of the problem.
 
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Sometimes you don't get along with therapists. Personally, I'm on my third. One was good for a while but then we got to an end. Second was just terrible. One meeting and I was out. Third (current), well I like her, but I'm not sure how much she's helping.
In summary..... sometimes things don't work out.

It's more common that WE would drop a therapist. But therapists can drop us. If things aren't working out. If they don't think they can help us. If they have completely views ... it's pointless. There are SO MANY therapists out there. You can find another one that is more suited for you. I'm at least glad that you didn't stay with that therapist for any longer!! There are much BETTER ones. Don't take it personally. <3 There are others who will definitely be able to help you more.
 
The reason why i had to give up on Psychiatrists was because they ended up causing me more stress in the long run and thus actually added to my mental illness. They hate patients that actually have a mind of their own and may christ have mercy on your soul if you don't agree with them. I just could no longer hack driving a hour or more, waiting atleast a half hour, finally getting into see them only to be told some fucking bullshit and be pushed out the door with refills in hand once the clock hit 15 minutes and then driving a hour back home wanting to seriously go back and beat the shit right out of the fat useless shrink i just wasted moat of my day on. Fuck that noise :p
 
The fact that our healthcare system selectively doles out care to those it deems "worthy" makes me sick. The fact that psychiatrists will dole out benzos like candy, but be too afraid to deal with somebody who is trying to reach out for help and move forward with the help of opiate replacement therapy is so backwards and harmful, yet sadly all too common. The fact that it is 2015 and people who take methadone are still stigmatized is unbelievable. We might as well still call Valium Mother's Little Helper and all take Reefer Madness as gospel.

Does this therapist not realize that addiction and PTSD go hand in hand? How could he not see that getting on MMT shows you are taking steps to heal?

I'm glad you are pissed and are filing a complaint! Nobody should ever let you feel like less of a person because of your choices or how you are dealing with them. Much less your therapist!
 
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