Snard
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 29, 2016
- Messages
- 3
Been hanging around for years. Hello.
Thought I would share an experience that was very interesting and arguably life-changing. Some time ago, I had an intense experience that I didn't expect. I'll detail it below.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Summer of 2015, fresh out of treatment, I had been back at using drugs for some time. I had met someone during my time inside and he was known for his love of methamphetamine, and taking one look at him it was evident - lost teeth, rotting teeth, skinniness, the works. Call him Kieth. We became friends of a sort in there, and when we were both out we got together, once. This is what occurred as a result of that evening/night.
It is nearly my birthday, and my good friend, call him Doc, who didn't really use drugs anymore (but loved watching other people do drugs), offered to buy me a $20 sack of heroin since I really wanted some and hadn't had any in ages and only used it once before then. Long story short, I couldn't get any of that, but I knew where I could get crystal meth almost assuredly. I had never used meth before and was eager to get together with an old acquaintance and have a new, stimulating experience. I asked Doc if he would just take a road trip about 45 minutes northeast of where we lived to go meet this guy and get a $20 bag or so of ice. He was reluctant, but I convinced him because I am a manipulative fiend when I get the urge. Not proud.
We eventually got there after some minor interruptions, like stopping for a skate spot we found, and also taking detours instead of the faster ways, which ended up being pretty fun since it was on some hills in the greener and more alive areas of the city. At this time it was probably around 6-7 PM. We meet Keith, and we hug and bullshit around in his room for a while, but of course the plan was to get high, so we started looking. His normal dude who lived right next to him was out, which was not good news because he got the good shit, and the other people we would have to go through did not. We eventually met up with another guy I was locked up with, Isaiah we'll say. We jumped through hoops that I'm sure everyone is familiar with, but eventually we got a $24 bag of crystal meth (Keith only had $4). It was nice looking. Legitimate stuff, but of course cut a bit as I later found out by my incessantly blood-crusted nose for the next few days which never happened with any future batches I got from other regions.
The time is probably about 7:30PM. We smoke a bowl or two of "standard" kush. Good shit, but not ridiculous. Not mids though
. I was pretty stoned, and I knew I shouldn't have been because I was on probation. But I didn't care because I was already failing all my drug tests with horribly diluted urine. Drinking until it hurts then drinking more is not a good way to pass unless your P.O. is a dumbass. We were driving, going to meet people, finished, then went back to Kieth's place and he showed me how to smoke meth out of a light bulb vape. I either didn't do it well or it just didn't hit me like I wanted (which has been the case for other smoked/vaporized drugs; heroin comes to mind but marijuana does hit me hard when I smoke it, so who knows). I instead chopped up lines. I kept a bit under .2 for myself, I estimate. I gave a bit to Kieth for paying and Isaiah didn't seem too concerned with the meth even though he used it. He was very casual about it and I was impressed by how he wasn't addicted even though he did it all the time but would even sometimes turn it down even though he was clearly not tweaking. It is about 9PM or later, and I realize I have to go home. So, I suck up a few more lines and lay one out for Isaiah but we were taking about something funny and I accidentally blew a laugh all over a line and it went all over and I apologized and he just said "It's cool man. I can get meth anytime" which I thought was pretty cool. Well, I saw that his line was still there but all over, so I scraped it up. Figuring he wouldn't want a line with little bits of desk gunk, I just take it instead. It hadn't really set in yet, but I had to go. So we packed up and headed downstairs and Keith tells Isaiah not to let his Keith's dad know he is on meth and instead just act like he is drunk, since his father is cool with the latter but not the former.
He does and acts like a jackass doing it. Saying over and over how drunk he is and Keith's father saying "alright man, that's fine." and clearly getting a bit annoyed. That passes and we get out to the car and Keith says he doesn't have his phone so we look all over the car and can't find it. I tell him if we find it I'll bring it to him next time. It is almost 10PM now and me and Doc are in the car with Isaiah and drop him off and head home. It was going to be a long drive so I put on some Korn because I was tweaking hard at this point, and I really liked that band at the time. I was very satisfied with the sensation meth provided. I kept doing lines off my iPad screen and singing which was uncharacteristic of me because one of my few insecurities is singing and it is intense. This was the only time I ever knowingly just let let and had a good time in front of someone else without feeling anxiety. It felt good. I told Doc that I really wanted to "just do all of it" and he told me to go for it. Mind you, he had not taken any the entire night, and never did. I did just that; I did it all. The burning in my nose created a synergy with the meth high made the burn feel wondrous. We talked, and eventually got to my house. At the time I lived with my grandparents and my grandmother was not happy about me doing drugs, and a stroke of bad luck made it so she saw my computer screen for a split second when I was trying to figure out how best to expel meth from my body. This was all before I had left, by the way. She was upset and I forget the interaction, but when I left I told her sarcastically I was going to go do meth, to be a dickhead. It worked.
Well, after this I was very anxious about my grandmother when I got home. When we pulled up I thought I saw her in the window of my room and everything was scattered and searched through, but it was just the meth fucking with me. She was really just looking out the window. I stayed outside for another twenty minutes or so, gathering myself and talking, then went inside. She confronted me. Apparently looked up signs of meth use, and I displayed quite a few of them. Especially the ungodly experience of swallowing constantly and unwillingly. I could have never looked like more of a tweaker in my life. Swallowing, moving every part of my body at some point or another, looking around, stuttering horribly; it was awful. It felt like half an hour before I could manage to get myself out of that conversation and upstairs into my room. I felt scared and defeated. I had the attitude of someone who loved getting high, was already n trouble for getting high, and who just got caught being high as fuck under those circumstances. I took off my coat and a short time after I found a few weeks old tube of dramamine that was mostly full. The time was about 11, perhaps 12AM. I can't be sure. I was stll very high from the meth, but had none left unfortunately. I decided to take some dramamine as I had experiences with it and diphenhydramine alone many, many times before. Especially when I was a and ultra-youngster. I don't remember the exact amount, but I know I took upwards of 400mg. I seem to remember around 500mg. Anyway, I knew it was good enough. I waited and talked to Kieth because he was one of the only people up. Eventually, I noticed something profound.
Say, 12:30 AM, I started to notice jittery visuals that are characteristic of diphenhydramine trips. They seems more electricity-like, and somehow smoother while also being sharper (not in the clear sense, but in the shape sense). This grew, and then I started having little thoughts that manifested visually. This is where it started. I had a fleeting thought of moving the visuals, like I do with most trips, except this time it worked completely. I was sending small jolts of "electricity" from one fingertip to another. It felt very real, looked very real, and above all else, I was not in an intense state of fear like I was 9 times out of 10 from diphenhydramine. I was astounded, and filled with wonder and excitement for this new experience. I started doing more, then decided that I should take full advantage and try magic. I focused on creating a ball of some sort of magical substance in my palm, and it worked. A ball about the size of a softball appeared and was glowing a sort of blue, due to the low lighting in my room at the time. i played with this for a bit, swishing it around you could call it. I then decided on something somehow very specific, and very big: open a portal.
I opened a portal. I was lying on my bed and looking at my door and then pointed my hand at it and made motions akin to magic-summoning. A dark purple, black swishy spot started forming and growing. It looked like black and purple had replaced all the colors in a fire, and that fire surrounded this portal.
It eventually grew to the size of the width of the door and over half the height, and then a figure started to emerge. I was getting scared now, seeing something of that magnitude operating by itself. I had no control over this creature after it showed itself. it kept coming, very large and sharing the flaming purple-black characteristic of the hole it was coming out of. It was huge, floating, and carrying something. After emerging completely, I recognized the creature as none other than the grim reaper. Death. terrified, i simply lied there. i was watching him, and he seemed fine with that, as he was waiting for what felt like an exceptionally long time for a creature like this in this situation. i came to my senses, in a way, and decided that the best course of action was holding out my hand. i did so. he approached, slowly, and i saw his red yet insubstantial eyes look into mine, and perhaps deeper as he took hold of my hand. At this moment i felt a deep, second-long, cold rush throughout my entire body and see a bright white flash along with it that blinds everything. i come back from it very quickly and still see him and then he releases after what feels like a very long time yet again, and he looks at me, and i at him, and he turns and leaves slowly out of the portal through which he entered. it closes, and the universe shuts off. the trip shuts off, everything, for a few minutes while i lied there thinking it over. i remember a thought pattern of nothing that had any real substance and certainly no words. as though the experience broke me, or perhaps wasn't compatible with conventional thinking. i would have to use other means. this feeling subsided after however long - i don't even know. i wondered if perhaps I was supposed to stop using drugs. i wondered if this meant some sort of religion was true, or that the supernatural were very substantial and very real. all sorts of things that i have never sorted out. i don't know if there is a way to sort ths out beyond accpeting that there is nothing else I can do. after this, i started seeing very strange archetypes, I called them. My "characters". One was an ethereal little girl who sang in a beautiful unknown language right next to me. She left shortly after and I never got to fully interact with her. She was a beauty. So bright in that darkness. Very unnatural. I have never tripped in a way that has had something so starkly different from my surroundings infused into them. For example, in a bright place I would see bright and vivid colors, and other light related things. Same for darkness. However, this was a true hallucination as she could not have looked more real and out of place. She was bright light blue in almost complete darkness, and emitting light. Utterly beautiful.
Throughout the night I interacted with an Assassin from the Assassin's Creed franchise, who would constantly peek up from the foot of my bed when I would look, and then go away. He would never harm me or attempt to unsettle me. Aside from the strange peeking that lasted for hours. There was a rustling under my bed that I immediately recognized as someone sleeping under my bed, but I thought it more symbolic and meaningful to not look at this person or creature. Somehow I achieved this and never let my curiosity get the better of me. I will never know what he looked like.
There was a man who seemed to have a half straight jacket, half suit on, and had no face. similar to slenderman but it looked more like a cloth sack, and he was shorter and benevolent. I felt an intense connection with him even though he never spoke to me, and would constantly do very creepy things like move around in very grotesque ways, but he was always there for comfort if things got a bit bad. I did have a short bout for a few minutes of anxiety that I recognized from older DPH trips, but I got a hold of this. Not after, however, I got an unsettling feeling of someone being behind me. You know how it goes; if you think it when delirious, you'll probably see it. I just wanted to get it out of the way so I decided to turn around, and sure enough about an inch from my face was a reanimated half decomposed frail young woman's body right in front of me and a huge jolt of fear runs through my body, but I get a hold of it somehow. I then get the feeling that she is not just going to leave, so i turned around again and the same thing happens. it pissed me off, and it was the last time.
There were of course other smaller things. the closet had a clothing monster in it, which looked very intricate and impressive but also terrifying as it was just a few feet from me. i saw many, many shadow people climbing on my walls as though they were 2D creatures. similar to something, but i can't think of the name. post ideas if you have any as to what the 2D shadow people are called, as i think i've seen them in lore of some kind.
As a result of the DPH my meth comedown was nonexistent. there is some science to it in another thread either here or on another site, i believe. it is a great antidote to an awful comedown from meth at least. likely others as well.
I started coming down slowly after the encounter with Death, and after meeting all those strange creatures and people I was finally beginning to feel somewhat normal. I didn't fall asleep, and rode out the rest of my day thinking of the incredible and horrifying. It resonated with me in a disturbing way. i had always thought about things deeply, especially in the last 5 or so years, and this made it so much more interesting. i am not saying that god is real or any supernatural being, but it was great food for thought and i hope it is for you guys as well. I'm sorry I'm not able to capture all the intensity of the trip, but that is how reports are. Thanks for reading. Shift was not consistently functioning so I apologize for some capitalization errors.
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_methamphetamine
substancecode_meth
substancecode_amphetamines
substancecode_dimenhydrinate
substancecode_deliriants
substancecode_marijuana
substancecode_cannabis
_combo_
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_spiritual
exptype_bodyload
exptype_difficult
roacode_oral
roacode_nasal
roacode_smoked
roacode_inhaled
Thought I would share an experience that was very interesting and arguably life-changing. Some time ago, I had an intense experience that I didn't expect. I'll detail it below.
------------------------------------------------------------------
Summer of 2015, fresh out of treatment, I had been back at using drugs for some time. I had met someone during my time inside and he was known for his love of methamphetamine, and taking one look at him it was evident - lost teeth, rotting teeth, skinniness, the works. Call him Kieth. We became friends of a sort in there, and when we were both out we got together, once. This is what occurred as a result of that evening/night.
It is nearly my birthday, and my good friend, call him Doc, who didn't really use drugs anymore (but loved watching other people do drugs), offered to buy me a $20 sack of heroin since I really wanted some and hadn't had any in ages and only used it once before then. Long story short, I couldn't get any of that, but I knew where I could get crystal meth almost assuredly. I had never used meth before and was eager to get together with an old acquaintance and have a new, stimulating experience. I asked Doc if he would just take a road trip about 45 minutes northeast of where we lived to go meet this guy and get a $20 bag or so of ice. He was reluctant, but I convinced him because I am a manipulative fiend when I get the urge. Not proud.
We eventually got there after some minor interruptions, like stopping for a skate spot we found, and also taking detours instead of the faster ways, which ended up being pretty fun since it was on some hills in the greener and more alive areas of the city. At this time it was probably around 6-7 PM. We meet Keith, and we hug and bullshit around in his room for a while, but of course the plan was to get high, so we started looking. His normal dude who lived right next to him was out, which was not good news because he got the good shit, and the other people we would have to go through did not. We eventually met up with another guy I was locked up with, Isaiah we'll say. We jumped through hoops that I'm sure everyone is familiar with, but eventually we got a $24 bag of crystal meth (Keith only had $4). It was nice looking. Legitimate stuff, but of course cut a bit as I later found out by my incessantly blood-crusted nose for the next few days which never happened with any future batches I got from other regions.
The time is probably about 7:30PM. We smoke a bowl or two of "standard" kush. Good shit, but not ridiculous. Not mids though
. I was pretty stoned, and I knew I shouldn't have been because I was on probation. But I didn't care because I was already failing all my drug tests with horribly diluted urine. Drinking until it hurts then drinking more is not a good way to pass unless your P.O. is a dumbass. We were driving, going to meet people, finished, then went back to Kieth's place and he showed me how to smoke meth out of a light bulb vape. I either didn't do it well or it just didn't hit me like I wanted (which has been the case for other smoked/vaporized drugs; heroin comes to mind but marijuana does hit me hard when I smoke it, so who knows). I instead chopped up lines. I kept a bit under .2 for myself, I estimate. I gave a bit to Kieth for paying and Isaiah didn't seem too concerned with the meth even though he used it. He was very casual about it and I was impressed by how he wasn't addicted even though he did it all the time but would even sometimes turn it down even though he was clearly not tweaking. It is about 9PM or later, and I realize I have to go home. So, I suck up a few more lines and lay one out for Isaiah but we were taking about something funny and I accidentally blew a laugh all over a line and it went all over and I apologized and he just said "It's cool man. I can get meth anytime" which I thought was pretty cool. Well, I saw that his line was still there but all over, so I scraped it up. Figuring he wouldn't want a line with little bits of desk gunk, I just take it instead. It hadn't really set in yet, but I had to go. So we packed up and headed downstairs and Keith tells Isaiah not to let his Keith's dad know he is on meth and instead just act like he is drunk, since his father is cool with the latter but not the former. He does and acts like a jackass doing it. Saying over and over how drunk he is and Keith's father saying "alright man, that's fine." and clearly getting a bit annoyed. That passes and we get out to the car and Keith says he doesn't have his phone so we look all over the car and can't find it. I tell him if we find it I'll bring it to him next time. It is almost 10PM now and me and Doc are in the car with Isaiah and drop him off and head home. It was going to be a long drive so I put on some Korn because I was tweaking hard at this point, and I really liked that band at the time. I was very satisfied with the sensation meth provided. I kept doing lines off my iPad screen and singing which was uncharacteristic of me because one of my few insecurities is singing and it is intense. This was the only time I ever knowingly just let let and had a good time in front of someone else without feeling anxiety. It felt good. I told Doc that I really wanted to "just do all of it" and he told me to go for it. Mind you, he had not taken any the entire night, and never did. I did just that; I did it all. The burning in my nose created a synergy with the meth high made the burn feel wondrous. We talked, and eventually got to my house. At the time I lived with my grandparents and my grandmother was not happy about me doing drugs, and a stroke of bad luck made it so she saw my computer screen for a split second when I was trying to figure out how best to expel meth from my body. This was all before I had left, by the way. She was upset and I forget the interaction, but when I left I told her sarcastically I was going to go do meth, to be a dickhead. It worked.
Well, after this I was very anxious about my grandmother when I got home. When we pulled up I thought I saw her in the window of my room and everything was scattered and searched through, but it was just the meth fucking with me. She was really just looking out the window. I stayed outside for another twenty minutes or so, gathering myself and talking, then went inside. She confronted me. Apparently looked up signs of meth use, and I displayed quite a few of them. Especially the ungodly experience of swallowing constantly and unwillingly. I could have never looked like more of a tweaker in my life. Swallowing, moving every part of my body at some point or another, looking around, stuttering horribly; it was awful. It felt like half an hour before I could manage to get myself out of that conversation and upstairs into my room. I felt scared and defeated. I had the attitude of someone who loved getting high, was already n trouble for getting high, and who just got caught being high as fuck under those circumstances. I took off my coat and a short time after I found a few weeks old tube of dramamine that was mostly full. The time was about 11, perhaps 12AM. I can't be sure. I was stll very high from the meth, but had none left unfortunately. I decided to take some dramamine as I had experiences with it and diphenhydramine alone many, many times before. Especially when I was a and ultra-youngster. I don't remember the exact amount, but I know I took upwards of 400mg. I seem to remember around 500mg. Anyway, I knew it was good enough. I waited and talked to Kieth because he was one of the only people up. Eventually, I noticed something profound.
Say, 12:30 AM, I started to notice jittery visuals that are characteristic of diphenhydramine trips. They seems more electricity-like, and somehow smoother while also being sharper (not in the clear sense, but in the shape sense). This grew, and then I started having little thoughts that manifested visually. This is where it started. I had a fleeting thought of moving the visuals, like I do with most trips, except this time it worked completely. I was sending small jolts of "electricity" from one fingertip to another. It felt very real, looked very real, and above all else, I was not in an intense state of fear like I was 9 times out of 10 from diphenhydramine. I was astounded, and filled with wonder and excitement for this new experience. I started doing more, then decided that I should take full advantage and try magic. I focused on creating a ball of some sort of magical substance in my palm, and it worked. A ball about the size of a softball appeared and was glowing a sort of blue, due to the low lighting in my room at the time. i played with this for a bit, swishing it around you could call it. I then decided on something somehow very specific, and very big: open a portal.
I opened a portal. I was lying on my bed and looking at my door and then pointed my hand at it and made motions akin to magic-summoning. A dark purple, black swishy spot started forming and growing. It looked like black and purple had replaced all the colors in a fire, and that fire surrounded this portal.
It eventually grew to the size of the width of the door and over half the height, and then a figure started to emerge. I was getting scared now, seeing something of that magnitude operating by itself. I had no control over this creature after it showed itself. it kept coming, very large and sharing the flaming purple-black characteristic of the hole it was coming out of. It was huge, floating, and carrying something. After emerging completely, I recognized the creature as none other than the grim reaper. Death. terrified, i simply lied there. i was watching him, and he seemed fine with that, as he was waiting for what felt like an exceptionally long time for a creature like this in this situation. i came to my senses, in a way, and decided that the best course of action was holding out my hand. i did so. he approached, slowly, and i saw his red yet insubstantial eyes look into mine, and perhaps deeper as he took hold of my hand. At this moment i felt a deep, second-long, cold rush throughout my entire body and see a bright white flash along with it that blinds everything. i come back from it very quickly and still see him and then he releases after what feels like a very long time yet again, and he looks at me, and i at him, and he turns and leaves slowly out of the portal through which he entered. it closes, and the universe shuts off. the trip shuts off, everything, for a few minutes while i lied there thinking it over. i remember a thought pattern of nothing that had any real substance and certainly no words. as though the experience broke me, or perhaps wasn't compatible with conventional thinking. i would have to use other means. this feeling subsided after however long - i don't even know. i wondered if perhaps I was supposed to stop using drugs. i wondered if this meant some sort of religion was true, or that the supernatural were very substantial and very real. all sorts of things that i have never sorted out. i don't know if there is a way to sort ths out beyond accpeting that there is nothing else I can do. after this, i started seeing very strange archetypes, I called them. My "characters". One was an ethereal little girl who sang in a beautiful unknown language right next to me. She left shortly after and I never got to fully interact with her. She was a beauty. So bright in that darkness. Very unnatural. I have never tripped in a way that has had something so starkly different from my surroundings infused into them. For example, in a bright place I would see bright and vivid colors, and other light related things. Same for darkness. However, this was a true hallucination as she could not have looked more real and out of place. She was bright light blue in almost complete darkness, and emitting light. Utterly beautiful.
Throughout the night I interacted with an Assassin from the Assassin's Creed franchise, who would constantly peek up from the foot of my bed when I would look, and then go away. He would never harm me or attempt to unsettle me. Aside from the strange peeking that lasted for hours. There was a rustling under my bed that I immediately recognized as someone sleeping under my bed, but I thought it more symbolic and meaningful to not look at this person or creature. Somehow I achieved this and never let my curiosity get the better of me. I will never know what he looked like.
There was a man who seemed to have a half straight jacket, half suit on, and had no face. similar to slenderman but it looked more like a cloth sack, and he was shorter and benevolent. I felt an intense connection with him even though he never spoke to me, and would constantly do very creepy things like move around in very grotesque ways, but he was always there for comfort if things got a bit bad. I did have a short bout for a few minutes of anxiety that I recognized from older DPH trips, but I got a hold of this. Not after, however, I got an unsettling feeling of someone being behind me. You know how it goes; if you think it when delirious, you'll probably see it. I just wanted to get it out of the way so I decided to turn around, and sure enough about an inch from my face was a reanimated half decomposed frail young woman's body right in front of me and a huge jolt of fear runs through my body, but I get a hold of it somehow. I then get the feeling that she is not just going to leave, so i turned around again and the same thing happens. it pissed me off, and it was the last time.
There were of course other smaller things. the closet had a clothing monster in it, which looked very intricate and impressive but also terrifying as it was just a few feet from me. i saw many, many shadow people climbing on my walls as though they were 2D creatures. similar to something, but i can't think of the name. post ideas if you have any as to what the 2D shadow people are called, as i think i've seen them in lore of some kind.
As a result of the DPH my meth comedown was nonexistent. there is some science to it in another thread either here or on another site, i believe. it is a great antidote to an awful comedown from meth at least. likely others as well.
I started coming down slowly after the encounter with Death, and after meeting all those strange creatures and people I was finally beginning to feel somewhat normal. I didn't fall asleep, and rode out the rest of my day thinking of the incredible and horrifying. It resonated with me in a disturbing way. i had always thought about things deeply, especially in the last 5 or so years, and this made it so much more interesting. i am not saying that god is real or any supernatural being, but it was great food for thought and i hope it is for you guys as well. I'm sorry I'm not able to capture all the intensity of the trip, but that is how reports are. Thanks for reading. Shift was not consistently functioning so I apologize for some capitalization errors.
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_methamphetamine
substancecode_meth
substancecode_amphetamines
substancecode_dimenhydrinate
substancecode_deliriants
substancecode_marijuana
substancecode_cannabis
_combo_
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_spiritual
exptype_bodyload
exptype_difficult
roacode_oral
roacode_nasal
roacode_smoked
roacode_inhaled
Last edited by a moderator:
Possibly the only positive DPH trip report I've ever read.