I've been through some crazy shit in the past six months. Went to jail for three weeks, then court ordered to rehab. It was needed because heroin was taking over my life, and I could keep from stealing shit to feed my habit. So first, I don't promote the use of opiates, AT ALL! They have destroyed my life, and you would think after five months of rehabilitation I would have learned a lot more. But here goes my tale of relapse... -Sigh.
Three days prior to this post I procured a gram of MDMA, with therapeutic intentions of getting a heavy weight/life burdens off of my shoulders. Before this I had 153 days of sobriety, in which I was complete self-will run riot. I really had the purest of intentions with this MDMA, and with my first dose I did. I had a pleasant experience. The MDMA felt very pure too, so pure that I fell asleep as soon as my roll was over. I did a heavy dose as well, roughly 200mg/weighed out with no re-dosing. I cried a lot during this experience, and I know the saying goes 'There is no chemical solution to a spiritual problem', but I truly disagree. MDMA can help anybody out. Well, The next day I got the bright idea, because I had wanted to try it forever...IV MDMA. I had always wanted to try it, and I just so happened to have the resources available. I had 5 Avonex syringes (packaged) from my previous heroin use. (Note: they are glass with large needles. I would guess 18-20g.)
My first experience with IV MDMA was brilliant. I weighed out roughly 50mg, and got all my gear together. Pulling MDMA up vaguely reminded me of pulling back methamphetamine. I was curious as to what my solution would look like in the syringe, because my MDMA has a slight yellow tint to it. Surprisingly it pulled up very clear. I proceeded to IV, into my mainline (left arm).
After I pulled my syringe out there was about 3 seconds that I debated if I did too little, then it hit me like a train. IV MDMA, much like most drugs IV'd, takes on a complete different form than any other ROA w/ MDMA. I instantly felt sick to my stomach, I broke out in a vicious sweat, and it felt like I was 200 degrees. Those are the only negatives of this experience. The positives: I felt fucking amazing, everything was so bright and dreamlike. Once my stomach eased up I had this blowing-up feeling start spreading across my body. I laid back on my bed, my friend was there with me; and he started talking to me asking how I felt? The odd thing was, I had nothing to say to him. I was laid out, and it just kept getting more intense. I had the most intense sensation of cold-chills going down my spine, it was amazing. Something to note with IV MDMA as aforementioned, in my case that is, I had almost no feelings of empathy, not even a strong desire to social network or listen to music
. I could go on and on about IV MDMA on its own, but that isn't what this report is about... cutting to the chase!
Early today I, in my mind, officially relapsed. I procured the evil; opiates. I got three 4mg dilaudid pills. I got home and IV'd one. It was pretty nice, although mentally disappointing. I debated with myself that I should just give the other two away. But then my inner addict was like, speed-ball those mother fuckers. So... I did.
I got all my gear. Weight out 75mg of MDMA, put in one spoon. Then I busted up 6mg dilaudid and put it in another spoon. I first drew back my MDMA, then I pulled back my dilaudid. I shook my syringe up, and the resulting liquid was a very opaque milky looking substance. I don't know the exact amount of water I used because the Avonex syringes sadly have no measurement system on them, but I added a slight bit more water than needed to dilute it a bit. Now this experience is one of those that will be stuck in my head for the rest of my life. I've IV'd cocaine/heroin and cocaine/dilaudid quite a few times, but this experience is one... that was a complete tangent.
I tied off, and hit in my mainline (left arm). I loosened my tie and boom I was rocked, beyond rocked. I don't really know what I was feeling more at the time, but I instantly got extremely sick to my stomach and broke out in crazy sweats. I couldn't really put my finger on which drug I felt more obvious at the time. After my stomach eased up, which happened really quickly, I lit a cig, and just sat back in a dumbfounded state. I didn't know if I felt good or just really strange. But the MDMA quickly broke thru the dilaudid and It hit me hard. I was just laid out and lost, really confused. I started getting the cold chills on my back again but they were much more intense, and I had this warm sensation that made my eyes feel like they were pulsating. For about 20 minutes I was beyond euphoric, and I was bumping rinse.fm in the background so it made it even better. I felt too into the music. I don't really know what else to say because this all happened about three hours ago and I'm still pretty out there. I have to wear my mothers glasses just to see straight. I may edit and add more later, sorry if the typing is bad. But I feel to fucking to worry about grammatical issues atm. I think I'm going to use my last 2mg of dilaudid here shortly.~ Good experience so far!
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_mdma
substancecode_empathogens
substancecode_hydromorphone
substancecode_opiates
_combo_
explevel_firsttime
exptype_positive
exptype_bodyload
roacode_iv
Three days prior to this post I procured a gram of MDMA, with therapeutic intentions of getting a heavy weight/life burdens off of my shoulders. Before this I had 153 days of sobriety, in which I was complete self-will run riot. I really had the purest of intentions with this MDMA, and with my first dose I did. I had a pleasant experience. The MDMA felt very pure too, so pure that I fell asleep as soon as my roll was over. I did a heavy dose as well, roughly 200mg/weighed out with no re-dosing. I cried a lot during this experience, and I know the saying goes 'There is no chemical solution to a spiritual problem', but I truly disagree. MDMA can help anybody out. Well, The next day I got the bright idea, because I had wanted to try it forever...IV MDMA. I had always wanted to try it, and I just so happened to have the resources available. I had 5 Avonex syringes (packaged) from my previous heroin use. (Note: they are glass with large needles. I would guess 18-20g.)
My first experience with IV MDMA was brilliant. I weighed out roughly 50mg, and got all my gear together. Pulling MDMA up vaguely reminded me of pulling back methamphetamine. I was curious as to what my solution would look like in the syringe, because my MDMA has a slight yellow tint to it. Surprisingly it pulled up very clear. I proceeded to IV, into my mainline (left arm).
After I pulled my syringe out there was about 3 seconds that I debated if I did too little, then it hit me like a train. IV MDMA, much like most drugs IV'd, takes on a complete different form than any other ROA w/ MDMA. I instantly felt sick to my stomach, I broke out in a vicious sweat, and it felt like I was 200 degrees. Those are the only negatives of this experience. The positives: I felt fucking amazing, everything was so bright and dreamlike. Once my stomach eased up I had this blowing-up feeling start spreading across my body. I laid back on my bed, my friend was there with me; and he started talking to me asking how I felt? The odd thing was, I had nothing to say to him. I was laid out, and it just kept getting more intense. I had the most intense sensation of cold-chills going down my spine, it was amazing. Something to note with IV MDMA as aforementioned, in my case that is, I had almost no feelings of empathy, not even a strong desire to social network or listen to music
. I could go on and on about IV MDMA on its own, but that isn't what this report is about... cutting to the chase!Early today I, in my mind, officially relapsed. I procured the evil; opiates. I got three 4mg dilaudid pills. I got home and IV'd one. It was pretty nice, although mentally disappointing. I debated with myself that I should just give the other two away. But then my inner addict was like, speed-ball those mother fuckers. So... I did.
I got all my gear. Weight out 75mg of MDMA, put in one spoon. Then I busted up 6mg dilaudid and put it in another spoon. I first drew back my MDMA, then I pulled back my dilaudid. I shook my syringe up, and the resulting liquid was a very opaque milky looking substance. I don't know the exact amount of water I used because the Avonex syringes sadly have no measurement system on them, but I added a slight bit more water than needed to dilute it a bit. Now this experience is one of those that will be stuck in my head for the rest of my life. I've IV'd cocaine/heroin and cocaine/dilaudid quite a few times, but this experience is one... that was a complete tangent.
I tied off, and hit in my mainline (left arm). I loosened my tie and boom I was rocked, beyond rocked. I don't really know what I was feeling more at the time, but I instantly got extremely sick to my stomach and broke out in crazy sweats. I couldn't really put my finger on which drug I felt more obvious at the time. After my stomach eased up, which happened really quickly, I lit a cig, and just sat back in a dumbfounded state. I didn't know if I felt good or just really strange. But the MDMA quickly broke thru the dilaudid and It hit me hard. I was just laid out and lost, really confused. I started getting the cold chills on my back again but they were much more intense, and I had this warm sensation that made my eyes feel like they were pulsating. For about 20 minutes I was beyond euphoric, and I was bumping rinse.fm in the background so it made it even better. I felt too into the music. I don't really know what else to say because this all happened about three hours ago and I'm still pretty out there. I have to wear my mothers glasses just to see straight. I may edit and add more later, sorry if the typing is bad. But I feel to fucking to worry about grammatical issues atm. I think I'm going to use my last 2mg of dilaudid here shortly.~ Good experience so far!
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_mdma
substancecode_empathogens
substancecode_hydromorphone
substancecode_opiates
_combo_
explevel_firsttime
exptype_positive
exptype_bodyload
roacode_iv
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, it sucks I know. It makes me feel like I have some sort of sick mental perception that it is okay. It also happens to be quite a tender subject to me. I love IV drug use, I am in love with it. But that doesn't make it okay, and for some reason in my head when I get drugs that can be IV'd, they will be IV'd.. and that is not okay. This saying in general probably applies to some. I mean, I don't know if it necessarily means marijuana or drugs that you're rx'd. I do know that in my head I still have unfinished business with IV drug use, and It will be a battle keeping to a recreation non-IV drug user. -Sigh. I really didn't mean to come off like that pofacedhoe. Sorry :'(
