Vindicator209
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 25, 2016
- Messages
- 1
Hello! I've lurked for a long while here, BL has been a great source of information- especially these trip reports, since they gave me some confidence about knowing what was to come. I felt I should contribute with my own report as well.
I bought some capsules from a friend some time ago, in preparation for a rave. While I didn't test them, I did watch him measure and fill the capsules. I chickened out of taking them (or going to the rave), since I wasn't really sure what it would do, or how I would act in public. Since then, I've done a lot of reading around these forums to try and get an idea for what to expect. I'm a 22yr old, 150lb male. Although most advice seems to be to "start small" in terms of dosage, I didn't want to risk having to wait 6 months after an underwhelming experience. So two (160mg) it was.
I felt like I had a good understanding of what to expect, the general timeline, and had plans for most side effects. All in all I went in probably a bit overconfident.
After having dinner at 6pm, waiting some time to digest (as I've read that mitigates nausea), I locked myself in my room with every material I could think I might want, and popped both pills at once.
While I didn't mean to write up so much nonsense, typing and expressing my feelings in words felt good. I can't tell if any of this is worth reading, but here are my notes from last night:
In retrospect, the whole experience was phenomenal.
Sensory stimulation of any kind was probably the key factor. I didn?€™t realize it at the time, but I was absolutely inundated with sensory input- Smell from the candle, Taste from the Halls, Sound from the music, Sight from the changing colored lights (Philips Hues), and Touch from all sorts of crap.
I should have some source of flashing lights or lasers- solid colors were just underwhelming.
I should have worn shoes. My feet hurt from stomping on the hard floor.
I did a quick Google search regarding MDMA and sex. Turns out MDMA inhibits orgasm. This seems at odds with the activity suggestions elsewhere online- but maybe it?€™s enjoyable for the girl.
Typing my experience was cathartic. In the absence of other people, expressing my thoughts on paper felt like a social activity. This paper understands me, man.
I can?€™t listen to trance anymore. Whenever I hear it, I have the mental expectation of that sparkly magic, and it?€™s just not there.
I?€™m worried that that feeling might affect all the other things I did?€? but then again all I did was flail all night, really.
Overall, I think I wouldn't have had nearly as much fun and confidence if it weren't for you guys, so, thanks.
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_mdma
substancecode_empathogens
explevel_firsttime
exptype_positive
roacode_oral
I bought some capsules from a friend some time ago, in preparation for a rave. While I didn't test them, I did watch him measure and fill the capsules. I chickened out of taking them (or going to the rave), since I wasn't really sure what it would do, or how I would act in public. Since then, I've done a lot of reading around these forums to try and get an idea for what to expect. I'm a 22yr old, 150lb male. Although most advice seems to be to "start small" in terms of dosage, I didn't want to risk having to wait 6 months after an underwhelming experience. So two (160mg) it was.
I felt like I had a good understanding of what to expect, the general timeline, and had plans for most side effects. All in all I went in probably a bit overconfident.
After having dinner at 6pm, waiting some time to digest (as I've read that mitigates nausea), I locked myself in my room with every material I could think I might want, and popped both pills at once.
While I didn't mean to write up so much nonsense, typing and expressing my feelings in words felt good. I can't tell if any of this is worth reading, but here are my notes from last night:
Timeline
8:00 PM (00:00)
Took 2 pills, 80mg MDMA + 40mg Caffeine (160mg MDMA total)
Put on Electro House mix lol. That?€™s what the cool kids do right?
8:20 PM (00:20)
No Effects
Lit a scented candle, on internet?€™s suggestion. Thinking an open flame might be a bad idea lol.
8:30 PM (00:30)
Put on trance mix. Feels less?€? violent than the Electro House. Also less vocals.
I am very warm
Mind slightly hazy
8:37 PM (00:37)
Oh. Yeah. I can feel it.
I?€™m thirsty as fuck. Good thing I prepared like 5 water bottles.
I am on fucking fire fuck it?€™s so hot.
How has it only been 7 minutes?!
I don?€™t listen to trance music but it just sounds so?€? sparkly.
8:40 PM (00:40)
My hair is sooooo fluffffyyyy
Bounce bounce bounce
Failed to take sip of water.
Cold water on my chest feels good.
My bed is covered in water.
I?€™m eating these Halls like candy
Aw fuck there?€™s water everywhere. Spilling a little on my chest felt good so I tried again but spilled too much.
8:45 PM (00:45)
Halls don?€™t help thirstiness
8:50 PM (00:50)
Flailing arms like maniac
I AM ON FUCKING FIRREE
Got off bed. Jumping and flailing.
Ohhhh fuck I have another like 3 hours of this.
8:58 PM (00:58)
Oh god I?€™m so hot.
Shirt and boxers coming off. Full commando.
Turns out balls bouncing around are slightly uncomfortable.
9:06 PM (01:06)
I feel exhausted from jumping, but I don?€™t want to stop.
Rubbing my face in blanket. It?€™s soooooo sofffttt
I?€™ve been touching myself all over. It feels so good. My body, not the hands.
9:14 PM (01:14)
Playing with balls while dancing. Not in an erotic way though.
I suppose the freedom of my balls moving is novel. Unusual experience.
9:17 PM (01:17)
I keep closing my eyes while dancing, but seeing my multicolored lights is interesting. I keep wanting to close my eyes, but I?€™m fighting to keep them open at ceiling.
The silhouette my hands and fingers make against the light is really interesting.
I think I understand glowsticks now. I should have gotten some.
9:20 PM (01:20)
Put blanket over my shoulders while dancing. This is amazing. So much sensory input.
Blankets cause airflow, feels amazing.
Blankets brush against my body. Feels amaaazing.
Airflow counteracts heat of wearing blanket.
Still on fire though. Don?€™t really care though. Everything is right in the world.
Halls were a good idea. Taste sensory input apparently very interesting. Menthol also makes taking deep breaths a fun experience.
9:28 PM (01:28)
Can?€™t feel thirstiness, but forcing myself to drink water. Typing has become hard.
I don?€™t like it. I don?€™t like drinking.
I am sweating so much.
Female trance vocals are like a fucking orgasm.
9:31 PM (01:31)
Flailing slowed down. Mostly just bumping to the beat.
Holding blanket against face and body. Fuck that feels good.
Mentally, I want to keep moving and do something else and find new sensory input, but It?€™s really hard stop doing whatever I?€™m currently doing because it feels so good already.
9:35 PM (01:35)
I am so fucking sweaty it?€™s kind of grossing me out. Yet, despite thinking that, I also don?€™t care. Everything is right.
9:37 PM (01:37)
After blanket hugging for so long I feel like I have energy again. Or maybe it?€™s just the music. Back to flailing.
9:40 PM (01:40)
WOW. BLANKET TO THE BALLS. I HAVE NEVER FELT THIS BEFORE.
Drinking cold water sensation is very good.
But I don?€™t want to stop to drink.
9:42 PM (01:42)
Holding blanket up in air and bouncing to music. Blanket whipping against face is new, is amazing.
9:44 PM (01:44)
Pressing blanket against my ears, forcing earbuds in. BASS BASS BASS LOUD IS SO GOOD.
Sticking nose directly into scented handle. Smells amazing. Heat from candle on face feels amazing.
Which is weird because HOLY FUCK I?€™M SO HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT.
9:47 PM (01:47)
Too hot. Lost the blanket.
Cupping balls while dancing. Bouncing balls was uncomfortable so it was natural, but feeling my palm against my sack is also nice. Novel == Interesting I guess. So is the pose you make while cupping your balls and flailing your other arm like some kind of rodeo. Novel.
I tried putting down the blanket, but without the airflow it?€™s also too hot.
Or maybe if I didn?€™t have a blanket on it wouldn?€™t have been hot?€? Who knows.
9:50 PM (01:50)
(More) Upbeat song came on. ENERGY. I HAVE SO MUCH ENERGY.
I?€™m jumping as hard as I can. Like touching my 12ft ceiling would be bliss and I?€™m trying as fucking hard as I can to reach it.
9:52 PM (01:52)
Oppressive high pitch melodies ARE AMAZING WHAT THE FUCK BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.
Circles are cool. My arms are circles. My hands are circles. I?€™m jumping in circles.
Fuck I forgot my headphones were attached to my laptop. Accidentally unplugged while spinning. Music stopping was the most devastating thing. Like serious panic, practically dived to catch my headphone plug.
Soothing female vocals oh my god it?€™s so smoooooth.
9:56 PM (01:56)
Grabbing handfuls of random parts of my body. Like I grabbed my thigh- it?€™s unbelievable how much meat I have.
Trying to grab handfuls of my abdomen/upper chest, but not enough meat, end up just pinching myself really hard trying to grasp more meat.
9:58 PM (01:58)
One of the videos on this trance youtube playlist was age restricted, so the music paused for like a full minute until I realized and went to fix it. I was dancing to silence that whole time. Strangely the opposite reaction from when I unplugged on accident?€?
Maybe because last song had a chance to come down, rather than the abrupt stop of unpluggin.
Holy fuck I?€™ve written 3 pages now. I?€™m worrying I might be wasting too much time writing things, but somehow I also don?€™t care because I?€™m still bouncing while typing.
10:02 PM (02:02)
Mid chest very sweaty, very slippery. Rubbing feels amazing. Rubbing with spread out finger tips. So much sensory input.
Went back to ?€œgrabbing meat?€ on my sides- It just occured to me this is called ?€œmassaging?€ and not whatever meat grabbing bullshit I was talking about.
Massaging legs while bouncing. While it feels good, it also suddenly highlighted how much my legs are sore.
10:06 PM (02:06)
Before dosing, I was worried I wouldn?€™t ?€œknow how to dance?€ and it wouldn?€™t be fun. Now I?€™m flailing my arms and thinking about that and laughing at how silly that was. At how silly I am now. The thought of me laughing like crazy makes me laugh.
Waving my arms around in the air like I?€™m a fucking helicopter. Getting energy out feels good. Causing airflow feels even better.
10:10 PM (02:10)
Doing motions as if I were jumping rope. I can?€™t stop laughing. I feel like a child.
10:13 PM (02:13)
Applying pressure to thighs with hands, while sliding down to the knees. Pressure feels amazing, but massaging my sore thighs from bouncing is even orgasmic. The feeling of independent fingers tugging on the skin while sliding, applying pressure. I feel like I can feel every ripple of my skin. On my way up, I lightly brush the hair on my thighs, and I can feel the slight warmth coming off my hands from the friction from the way down. Fuck that?€™s good.
10:17 PM (02:17)
Lower back hurts from leaning over to type. Put hands on sides, digging my thumb into lower back, and then leaning back.
While holding that ridiculous pose, I?€™m also bouncing my legs to the musics. It would appear to an outsider that I?€™m trying to hump at the cieling/and or flinging my dong around. I?€™m laughing at myself. The awareness of me laughing like a maniac by myself is making me laugh more. I can?€™t stop.
10:20 PM (02:20)
I know I?€™ve beaten this point to death by now, but seriously any feeling that you don?€™t normally feel in your balls is verrrryyyy interesting.
10:21 PM (02:21)
Rapid short contractions of all muscles, shaking hands while waving back and forth- pretending you?€™re being ?€œelectrocuted?€, is somehow very relieving, maybe because it uses different muscle groups.
10:23 PM (02:23)
?€œDrumming?€ my fingers in the air while slowly waving my hands. The feeling of the blood being forced into finger tips is amazing- my fingers feel fluffy, light. Like?€? grapes?
Doesn?€™t require waving hands. Just holding hands in front of me and wriggling my fingers accomplishes this.
I realize these updates are only a few minutes apart, but it feels like decades to me. I think it?€™s because I?€™m noticing and processing every little bit of sensory stimulation that I would normally ignore.
10:27 PM (02:27)
Suddenly very amused about how much my ass sloshes about as I bounce. I guess that?€™s what twerking is about.
Drinking water feels okay, but it?€™s hard to stop whatever I?€™m doing to take a sip. Twisting the cap off seems like a huuuuge struggle I would rather avoid even though I?€™m parched.
10:32 PM (02:32)
Back to massaging. My neck and shoulders this time. Both hands on shoulders, arms crossed. Hugging myself while massaging shoulder, pressure on chest and tugging on skin feels amazing.
Hugging myself, putting my face in my arms. I feel so safe. Everything is right.
Hair has become sticky and wiry from sweat- running my hands through my hair and massaging scalp is amazing. Tugging on hair is not amazing, but feeling the wiry hair tingle my palm is.
The hair tugging doesn?€™t necessarily hurt or anything, but somehow it makes me feel ?€œhuman?€ or ?€œnormal?€ which conflicts with my high right now. (Retrospect: Maybe it?€™s a mundane feeling since I style my hair every morning.)
Waving my hands back and forth through my hair, causing a breeze on scalp. Amazing.
10:36 PM (02:36)
Turns out scalp-breeze can be accomplished just by head banging.
Tried both head banging and waving hands through hair (in the opposite direction) at the same time, since the sides don?€™t get as much of a breeze. The individual hairs whipping against my hands hurts- but it feels good. Like hundreds of little pricks tingling my fingers.
10:40 PM (02:40)
Headbanged too hard, bounced too hard, leaned forward, and unintentionally stretched my hamstrings. HOLY FUCK THAT FEELS GOOD.
STRETCHES FOR YOU AND YOU AND YOU AND YOU
Turns out I can?€™t bounce to music while also doing leg stretches at the same time. I fell over. It?€™s okay though. I don?€™t think my reaction time is impaired. I think I just feel so good that the loss of balance didn?€™t bother me. The feeling of?€? vertigo as I slowly tipped over was interesting.
10:44 PM (02:44)
Sweaty naked dude flailing and falling in middle of room. The laughter fits are back, I can?€™t handle it hahahahahahahahahaahahahah
I can totally see how this drug is sociable. Even if it makes you do embarassing things, you?€™re also letting down your guard- you can connect with other people doing dumb shit too.
There?€™s noone else here with me, but somehow I feel so connected, embraced.
10:48 PM (02:48)
Wiggling my kneecaps around hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Passing my hands up and down my body and legs. Wiggling my kneecaps, brushing over nipples, touching shoulders, then back down and up again. The nipples are weird. My skin is so smooth everywhere else, nipples just seems like a flaw.
Lightly scraping my fingernails down my sides. Feels interesting. Didn?€™t keep doing it long though. Not the most intense sensory input. Light sensory stimulation is good, but needs to be rapid- takes too long to bring hands back up to top, but fingernails not long enough to scratch on the way up.
10:53 PM (02:53)
Jaws hurt. Everyone online warned against clenching. Eh.
11:00 PM (03:00)
Pounding chest to the beat, like tarzan. The reverberation through the body is amazing. Also the slight give when you beat your chest and the rib cage/lung give way- uhhhhh it?€™s cool I swear. It?€™s like I can feel the beat in my whole body. Perhaps this is something I miss by using headphones rather than a proper sound system.
11:05 PM (03:05)
Once in a while I have a clear vision of how ridiculous I look. I get a little embarassed but laugh really hard. Under normal circumstances this might be a zero sum game, but I can?€™t really feel embarassment, so the happiness is overwhelming. Then again under normal circumstances I don?€™t even know if I could laugh at my own embarassment.
I am so fucking glad whoever made this trance mix put in slow songs once in awhile, otherwise I?€™d burn out too quickly. It?€™s really relieving. I feel like I have to match the tempo of the music at all costs.
11:11 PM (03:11)
Online suggestions for solo MDMA activities include web surfing, watching videos, or playing games. I can?€™t even fucking imagine that right now- as in it?€™s not what I want to do. I feel like I reeaaaallly need to expend energy, I seriously can?€™t even fathom being still for more than the few seconds it takes for me to sip water.
Online suggestions also include sex. My balls are shrunk so far up in my body. Absolutely zero eroticism felt, even after many non-erotic balls-rubbing activities.
This drug makes me feel accepted, close, and connected to ?€œeveryone?€ (although I?€™m alone). But it?€™s a comfortable, anonymous feeling- sexless, opinionless- everyone just is, and I just am. A level of intimacy and understanding that supersedes primal urges.
...Lol. Tried to stroke balls anyway. Nope, not feeling it. Mostly because it?€™s annoying I can?€™t match the beat of the music.
11:21 PM (03:21)
Stopped rapid contraction movements, trying smooth, long motions. Just trying new things.
I look like Voldo from soul calibur. Long slow movements are okay as long as I headbang to the rhythm.
Doing swimming backstrokes. Finding new muscles to use is relieving.
11:25 PM (03:25)
Thought it would be interesting to try more ?€œfeminine?€ movements. I don?€™t know what the fuck that means, but it involved me locking my legs together and waving my body around like those tube things in front of car dealerships.
Okay I stopped that. Putting my legs together made my balls uncomfortable.
Also knees are starting to hurt like hell.
Water is a major source of anxiety right now. I get scared when I feel like I haven?€™t drank in a while, but I?€™m also uncomfortable with stopping dancing to drink it.
I?€™m ?€œresting?€ by resting 3 of my 4 limbs while still bouncing with the last, rotating through my limbs.
Calves are sore, knees hurt. I think I?€™ve mentally associated moving to the beat with the happiness that the MDMA is giving me, which is why I?€™m afraid to stop moving.
11:33 PM (03:33)
Spun around, headphone cables wrapped lightly around neck. Imagined somehow accidentally choking myself to death, and then laughed at the idea of people finding my naked sweaty body. That?€™s probably really morbid but I?€™m very amused right now.
Randomly thought about my sister?€™s dog. It made me uncomfortable because I feel like I have less control of my base instincts right now than even a dog. NEED TO SHAKE LEG TO BEAT. WOOF.
11:37 PM (03:37)
Either I?€™m slightly coming down, or I?€™m just exhausted. Either way I?€™m slowing down a bit.
I just realized I can bounce to every other beat to conserve energy?€?
I also find that some smooth movements can match multiple beats, rather than abrupt motions for every beat.
11:40 PM (03:40)
It took a lot of effort, but I pulled off my earbuds to go to the bathroom. The silence was deafening. I felt confined. I felt like the silence was closing on me and constricting me. On the other hand, I finally feel like I can relax my muscles, without the OCD driving me to dance.
Walking to the bathroom, refilling my water bottle at the kitchen, all whilst naked. My roommate is out of town, so I?€™m nude in a place that?€™s normally somewhat public. It feels good. Partially voyeuristic, but not really erotic. Just a novel feeling. Something that doesn?€™t normally happen.
I?€™m concerned whether I?€™m actually hot, or it?€™s just mental and I?€™m actually really cold, thus why my balls are so shrunk.
Wait no, I?€™ve been flailing my arms like crazy for like 2 straight hours there?€™s no way I?€™m cold.
Music back in.
But wait, leaving the door open still gives me that voyeuristic satisfaction.
Just kidding. There?€™s no direct windows or anything, but suddenly I?€™m afraid of being seen from the front of the apartment lol. I?€™ll just leave it mostly closed but unlatched- still gives me that rush of ?€œsomeone could accidentally walk in!?€- of course, no one?€™s here to do that. I?€™m not like, turned on by it, but taking risks is giving me an adrenaline rush.
11:55 PM (03:55)
Only one corner of my room has multi-lights. The other walls of my room have only one lamp, which casts a solid, smooth color gradient on the wall. I can?€™t stand it. I can?€™t look at it. It?€™s too plain. Too.... congealed. I can minimize the discomfort by swinging my head around, causing the lights to make trails in my vision, but even this effect is more intense when I look at the triple lamp in the corner, showing different 3 colors.
Holy fuck the colors blend on my ceiling, how have I not noticed that until now?
12:00 AM (04:00)
Typing somehow feels relaxing in between spurts of spontaneous behavior, which is why I can?€™t stay away for long. While it is relaxing, I?€™m also tempted to just turn around and lose my fucking mind. The problem is that my sense of time is fucked, so I feel like I haven?€™t typed in a long time even when it?€™s only be like 3 minutes.
12:03 AM (04:03)
Using a towel to wipe away sweat so I don?€™t get cold without knowing. You can probably see where this is going. It?€™s very fluffy. The texture is different than the blanket, dragging it across my back is amazing. The slight warmth from the friction is nice too. Despite the fact that I?€™m already sweating bullets.
Draped towel over my head. The enclosure makes me feel so safe.
I keep getting used to the audio volume and I feel like it needs to be turned up. It?€™s at max volume now.
12:09 AM (04:09)
Tried really hard not to type for the last few minutes.
Thoughts just get backed up, and I feel anxious if I don?€™t express them here.
Started waving towel with both hands like flags. Flags make me think of protest or wars. Man. We should just give everyone this drug, we wouldn?€™t have wars any more. This must have been popular with the hippies.
Back to wriggling my fingers as fast as I can while flailing at all my joints. This just feels right for high tempo songs. I have no idea if my finger wriggling keeps up with the highest speed beats, but I feel good for trying regardless.
The balls of my feet hurt like hell.
EVERY TIME WE TOUCH, I GET THIS FEEEELIIIIIINGGGGGGGG what a fucking amazing song. This song gets me.
12:17 AM (04:17)
If I wrap my head with the towel, then grab both ends and extend my arms, I can flail and hold my earbuds to my skull at the same time. It looks as stupid as it sounds. The closeness of the towel and its warmth makes me feel safe.
I don?€™t know if it?€™s my personal psyche, or it?€™s a common effect of the drug, but ?€œcomfort?€ and ?€œsafety?€ suddenly seem to mean a lot to me for some reason.
I mean, I?€™m naked and dancing in a (pretend-)public space, but I feel so safe. Accepted. Like everything is right with the world, and I?€™ve done good.
12:22 AM (04:22)
Online suggestions include cold/hot shower. While I really don?€™t want to leave the music, that does sound amazing, and I want to try something new. (I?€™ve been dancing for like 3 straight hours.) I?€™ll make the effort at 12:30. Just a little bit more?€?.
There was a song on this playlist that was slightly off genre. That made me really upset, but was quickly remedied once I changed it. It might have just been a weird intro. Probably the first time that?€™s happened so far. I can see the appeal of a proper DJ at a rave or something.
Funky sounds are very enjoyable. A lot of trance sounds the same. BASS BASS BASS TWEET TWEET TWEET, but then you get some BOING BOING BOING and some FFFEWWWWOOOOP. Clicks though. Clicks are orgasmic. Sharp, staccato noises just tickle my brain.
I fucking hate male voices. Generally in the intro to songs. Always some grisly European voice. They grate on my ears.
Then there?€™s the ?€œMC?€™s?€ who are trying to hype me but I?€™m like I?€™M ALREADY ROLLING BALLS HERE JUST PLAY THAT FUCKING BASS BASS BASS BASS
?€œAre you READAAYYY~~~??€ YES I?€™M FUCKING READY I?€™VE BEEN BANGING MY BRAIN AGAINST MY SKULL FOR LIKE 3 HOURS PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD THE MUSIC
I guess the only negative emotion I?€™m capable of feeling is fearing the absence of music.
12:34 AM (04:34)
Still haven?€™t gotten myself to take that shower yet.
?€œGlitch?€ songs that sample vocals as beats are AMAZING. This perfectly fits what I wanted with unique, funky sounds! So much variation!
I?€™m a genius. I?€™m listening to my music on a laptop. That means I can bring it into the bathroom with me!
Okay so my speakers are shit and the bathroom acoustics suck, but it?€™ll do.
I?€™m now dancing in the shower.
12:44 AM (04:44)
The sensation of swinging between very hot and very cold water is amazing.
I was thinking I would stay dancing in the shower for a long time, but it got uncomfortable. It?€™s very exciting- different temperatures, droplets hitting you everywhere, but it?€™s also a little exhausting. It?€™s not necessarily horrible, but it is slightly uncomfortable- it doesn?€™t feel ?€œsafe.?€ The pitter patter of the water hitting me is random and uncontrollable, and in no way matches the beat of the music.
The rush of cold air that ran over me felt amazing as I got out of the shower. I decided not to dry off.
I?€™m dripping everywhere and flinging water all over my room, but the air feels amazing.
I?€™m pretty sure this is how people get hypothermia. Oh sweet jesus drying off with the towel?€? Unreal.
12:47 AM (04:47)
Definitely much more calm, maybe because of the shower, but more likely the high is coming down.
I?€™m suddenly very aware of how sore my whole body is. Maybe I was just on an adrenaline rush until now? Ouch.
I put on clothes. After being wet and not dancing as hard, I got cold pretty quick.
I feel some mild pressure on my temples. Not necessarily upsetting, but it?€™s noticeable.
1:00 AM (05:00)
Closed my eyes and nodded off at some point.
1:04 AM (05:04)
Woke up suddenly. Remembered I wanted to try sexual stimulation as per the internet?€™s suggestion.
I got it up, but I seriously wasn?€™t feeling turned on, even with porn.
Made it a game of playing music over the porn and fapping to the beat lol. Honestly the music was the more enjoyable part.
1:10 AM (05:10)
Okay but really though I?€™ve been masturbating furiously for a while now. My dick is starting to hurt and I really just want to go to sleep.
Reached a half-assed orgasm eventually. Wasn?€™t very strong, and it felt small, confined, rather than a full body spasm. What a let down. I?€™m exhausted.
1:30 AM (05:30)
Very tired, nodding off. Feel like I might be wasting some of my high, but honestly I don?€™t feel it much.
7:30 AM (11:30)
Seemingly no adverse effects.
Woke up rather energetic, considering only 6 hours of sleep.
A little dehydrated, but about as much as I would be normally in the morning.
8:00 AM (12:00)
Well shit, that burst of energy is gone. I am exhausted. My muscles are trembling, my mind is hazy.
Conclusions
In retrospect, the whole experience was phenomenal.
Sensory stimulation of any kind was probably the key factor. I didn?€™t realize it at the time, but I was absolutely inundated with sensory input- Smell from the candle, Taste from the Halls, Sound from the music, Sight from the changing colored lights (Philips Hues), and Touch from all sorts of crap.
I should have some source of flashing lights or lasers- solid colors were just underwhelming.
I should have worn shoes. My feet hurt from stomping on the hard floor.
I did a quick Google search regarding MDMA and sex. Turns out MDMA inhibits orgasm. This seems at odds with the activity suggestions elsewhere online- but maybe it?€™s enjoyable for the girl.
Typing my experience was cathartic. In the absence of other people, expressing my thoughts on paper felt like a social activity. This paper understands me, man.
I can?€™t listen to trance anymore. Whenever I hear it, I have the mental expectation of that sparkly magic, and it?€™s just not there.
I?€™m worried that that feeling might affect all the other things I did?€? but then again all I did was flail all night, really.
Overall, I think I wouldn't have had nearly as much fun and confidence if it weren't for you guys, so, thanks.
Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_mdma
substancecode_empathogens
explevel_firsttime
exptype_positive
roacode_oral
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