Hey guys, this is my first post. Anyway, when I was a junior in highschool, I took some acid with my friends. I had a great time, beautiful visuals, amazing thoughts. I had the time of my life. I took it a few more times, everything went great.
One day, before one of my friends threw a party, we were chillin at his house. I had taken three tabs. We were smoking a good bit of bud. I was a considerable stoner at that point, and from previous experiences, I knew how amazing of a combo weed and LSD are.
Suddenly, seemingly for no reason at all, my heart started racing, and I was panicking in my own head. I felt like running away and being alone, I felt like I couldn't tell anyone what was going on in my head because they would think I was weird.
To say the least, I had a terrible time at the party, and continued to smoke weed just to be doing something social, almost like hiding in plain sight. When I came down, I didnt tell anyone about what had happened. I went back to my normal self and continued smoking regularly.
I tripped again, a few weeks later, and the same thing happened. This time right from the start. I felt like I didn't even want to exist. Not suicidal, I just wanted a break from being in reality. Weed only exacerbated the issue.
I tripped a few more times, thinking that I would figure out what was happening, but I never did, and I only made things worse.
Then one day, I started to get the same feelings, accompanied by panic attacks when I smoked weed. But I guess due to my desperation to fit in, I kept smoking. It was pretty deep seated in my social life. I had built all of my friend circles around smoking weed. I continued to get anxiety every time I smoked, but I kept doing it for 3 years. Even while by myself. I guess It was just a habit. I don't smoke at all anymore, but I am now constantly enveloped with anxiety and paranoia.
I am depressed, anxious, have no friends because now I am scared to even talk to those I am close to, like family members. And this makes it really hard to function as an adult, because there is nothing I would rather do than never talk to anyone again.
help.
One day, before one of my friends threw a party, we were chillin at his house. I had taken three tabs. We were smoking a good bit of bud. I was a considerable stoner at that point, and from previous experiences, I knew how amazing of a combo weed and LSD are.
Suddenly, seemingly for no reason at all, my heart started racing, and I was panicking in my own head. I felt like running away and being alone, I felt like I couldn't tell anyone what was going on in my head because they would think I was weird.
To say the least, I had a terrible time at the party, and continued to smoke weed just to be doing something social, almost like hiding in plain sight. When I came down, I didnt tell anyone about what had happened. I went back to my normal self and continued smoking regularly.
I tripped again, a few weeks later, and the same thing happened. This time right from the start. I felt like I didn't even want to exist. Not suicidal, I just wanted a break from being in reality. Weed only exacerbated the issue.
I tripped a few more times, thinking that I would figure out what was happening, but I never did, and I only made things worse.
Then one day, I started to get the same feelings, accompanied by panic attacks when I smoked weed. But I guess due to my desperation to fit in, I kept smoking. It was pretty deep seated in my social life. I had built all of my friend circles around smoking weed. I continued to get anxiety every time I smoked, but I kept doing it for 3 years. Even while by myself. I guess It was just a habit. I don't smoke at all anymore, but I am now constantly enveloped with anxiety and paranoia.
I am depressed, anxious, have no friends because now I am scared to even talk to those I am close to, like family members. And this makes it really hard to function as an adult, because there is nothing I would rather do than never talk to anyone again.
help.
