Mental Health Klonopin Withdrawal help please

[BlueWeepingRose]

Right now I'm having migraines. Before they were stress headaches, they would only hurt my temples and I put a dab of oil on my temples and this would heal it perfectly. I also went through the phase where it felt like my whole head was in a vice and I bought something over the counter and it took the edge off of it a little bit. I went to Walgreens so many times that the lady behind the counter knew me by name. I bought a heating pad and a ice pack, cough drops and dry mouth wash. My mouth still continues to be dry. I drink a lot of water throughout the day because I feel as if I'm going to dehydrate. This literally scares me sometimes. Now I chew sugarless gum and I'm at a stage now where I'm okay. Before it would give me bad stomach aches. There's so many symptoms I went through that it's crazy! I can't even believe it myself.

I went through the benzo belly as a lot of people call it. I ate the brat food diet. I had a fear of dying so many times or thought that I would die. When I looked at the withdrawal symptom list I think I literally cried inside my bedroom. Now I still can't believe this is going on. Do I tell anyone about this? No, not really. Because I feel like people would look at me like I'm crazy. One thing I noticed is how my immune system went down and how sick I've gotten. It's crazy. This withdrawal seems like it comes and goes like a wave. Right now these migraines are the symptom that's possibly the worst stage for me and even though my head is in so much pain and I still continue to think and analyze to myself on what stage I'm on. For some reason and this is just my thought alone, I feel like now that I'm back to feeling pain in my head again I'm very very close to healing. My brain wants Klonopin so badly and I stopped taking it. I told my doctor how I hated what the medication was doing to me and he stopped me C/T and wouldn't prescribe it to me anymore. Klonopin was making me have a lot more anxiety and my heart was racing. Right away I knew something wasn't right because I wasn't this anxious before. Even people noticed my hand shaking as I was smoking a cigarette. "Your hands shaking. What's up with that?"

I was outside an hotel porch and I was staring at my hand and I literally had to sit on my hand as I was smoking a cigarette. I took them because I suffer with Social Anxiety. My voice sometimes shakes and my hand even gets very clammy. I took it as it was prescribed. The minute I knew it was messing with me, I cried in the middle of the night because I was scared and knew I had to talk to my doctor. Sometimes I feel so stupid and I beat myself up about it. I wish I could have handled my Social Anxiety differently instead of taking the easy way out and asking for medication. I seriously hope I heal from this and that I won't 50 years old and still be suffering from Klonopin. Sometimes I still feel like I'll die because of Klonopin and than I have to remind myself. It's just Klonopin talking and I'm just getting paranoid. Still don't know all the answers yet, I still keep learning through. I do anything to distract myself as much as possible. Am I scared? Yes!! I am. 8( Very much so. I want to help others who are suffering from this horrible drug. I really do. This is possibly the worse withdrawal I've ever went through in my whole life. No lie. I regret abusing drugs in my past. Sometimes I feel like I'm being punished for this.

I can't wait until I write my blog so I can help others and share my thoughts on here. If you any advice or thoughts, please share them with me.

 

[Moreaux]

Hey BlueWeepingRose - those symptoms are all normal in benzo withdrawal. I never really had headaches until benzo withdrawal, and I got them when I stopped taking Xanax. I found that one aspirin and a cup of coffee helped get rid of them. I would make a cup of coffee whenever I felt it coming on. I would also immediately drink 16 oz of water before drinking the coffee. Aspirin thins the blood a little, and caffeine is a vasodilator, which means that your blood vessels will get wider and allow more blood to flow through with less resistance. This allows for more oxygen to get to your brain, and it also helps to relieve pressure. Try these, though make sure the coffee is fresh, I think it works better. If you don't have a single cup coffee brew system an automatic drip pot works fine, just make two cups (16oz) and use 1 scoop (~1 tbsp) of coffee. I used a medium blend, and would drink it black (I always drink my coffee that way) and I think in this instance it may be more beneficial just straight up if you can tolerate black coffee.

Benzos wrecked my digestive track. If you are having dry mouth and have issues with your stomach try hard candy as it doesn't seem to trigger as much stomach acid production as gum and you don't swallow as much air as you do when you chew gum. If you have no issues with sugar I would recommend candy with sugar and not the sugar substitute stuff, unless you can get candy with a natural plant based sugar substitute. Some people are intolerant to sugar substitutes and it may actually be making your headaches and benzo belly worse. Regarding benzo belly, it does go away. I had mine for about six months after I quit. I looked quite funny for a while, I was underweight and then I had this rock hard gut that didn't move. Try eating as healthy as possible, sticking to whole foods (fresh produce, meat, cheese, etc) whenever possible.

Your hands are going to shake for a while, that will also go away in time too. Quitting benzos, especially cold turkey initiates a glutamate response that is very hard on your nervous system; its called excitotoxicity, and it cuases neurological damage. The damage is not permanent, but it will take time to recover. This also helps to increase anxiety. In my opinion, anxiety will never be as extreme as when one is going through benzo withdrawal. This too gets better. I highly recommend the following supplements for benzo related withdrawal: Relora, l-theanine, lemon balm, and kava in emergencies. A good kava extract is very sedating - I like the maximum strength kava extract by Gaia herbs. You can get all those supplements at many grocery stores or vitamin shops. I am not certain if lemon balm comes in a supplement, I actually just grew my own in my back yard. It's pretty invasive and fast growing, so it's hard to run out. You can either slowly bake it to dry it out to make tea, use fresh leaves for tea, or juice several stems and leaves and drink the juice - does not taste great juiced but very sedating so it's worth it. I would only drink half an ounce to an ounce when I would juice, and I only did it once a day.

I'm sorry your family is still being difficult. Doing your own thing and brushing them off when they're negative is probably the healthiest thing to do right now. Out of curiosity, is your niece bragging to you because she wants you to feel bad or does she look up to you and wants you to know that she is doing well? Sometime when someone admires a person they brag on themselves so that person will view them as worthy - just thought I would mention that for you to consider in case that is what is going on.

You said you were going to write a blog, I think you should start documenting your experiences now. I think it would also help you better get through the withdrawal. If your doing it for harm reduction, be detailed on your use history, how you quit, your symptoms, and what you are doing that helps to alleviate the symptoms. Are you currently doing any therapy? Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is great for anxiety - I had no choice but to learn that through my withdrawal as medications weren't really an option, and outside of benzos nothing was going to make me feel good, though Indural (propranolol) really helps to stop the adrenaline reaction during anxiety - you may want to consider getting a prescription. CBT really helps with social anxiety as well. One thing I noticed when in withdrawal my social anxiety was the worse it had every been, so hopefully yours gets better in time. Cutting back on cigarettes also help lower anxiety, though I definitely know its hard to decrease smoking when you're in the middle of withdrawal. Keep up the good work - your update actually really sounds positive even though I know you are feeling lousy. I know some of the previous messages you have written you were in a much worse condition, so you are improving even if you don't really feel like. Keep staying strong, it does get better! You're doing great and I'm proud of you!