Flynnal
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2012
- Messages
- 849
So, two weeks ago I decided to kick Mirtazapine for good. It was making me irritable for no reason, in spite of getting decent sleep. I was always feeling like I could have felt better, but because I was always slow and lethargic when using this stuff I could not function to my full capacity, and would be moody and get angry at people for silly little things. I remember going off because someone gave someone a piece of candy before lunch break and told me they would give me a piece after lunch and then told me it was no big deal when I asked them for the candy after lunch break so I went right off which in hindsight was really stupid. Today if the same thing happened I'd just think...meh...and shrug it off, like a normal person should. It was really no big deal. Yes, I hate being bullshitted to, but it was no big deal as the guy said it himself. Now, I see why I was carrying on. It was the Mirtazapine affecting me in many ways.
The trouble with Mirtazapine is that it works on depression for a while, but then it craps out intermittently, leaving me feeling terrible, obsessive and thinking stupid thoughts, and yet I needed to take it as I was COMPLETELY unable to sleep without it.
It was also making me anxious too, because I remember feeling awful about things I couldn't change. That is anxiety to me, feeling bad about things you should be shrugging your shoulders about, since you can't control it and should be focusing on the future and most importantly the present.
So, I went onto Agomelatine for 10 days to reset my sleep pattern, this ALLOWED me to sleep whilst the Mirtazapine was being metabolized out of my system completely, then stopped taking Agomelatine since a week ago, since that, too, seems to screw with your sleep pattern on a long-term basis, from personal accounts I've heard about it.
Day 1 - no sleep AT ALL.
Day 2 - 2 hours of sleep, no dreaming.
Day 3 - 1.5 hours of sleep, no dreaming.
Day 4 - 2 hours of sleep, no dreaming. Itchiness, especially the legs.
Day 5 - 3.5 hours of sleep, a short dream. Terrible itchiness, the legs and feet.
Day 6 - Today - 4 hours of sleep, a longer dream than Day 5. Itchiness till there, but may improve.
Day 7 - ?...I will update this thread as my crisis progresses from terrible to much better, but I've been told it will take many months (perhaps even 3 to 6) before my sleep is back to what it was when I started using Mirtazapine back in the first quarter of 2004, which was basically 10 years ago give or take a couple weeks.
Anti-depressants - seriously, leave them alone unless you really have serious suicidal thoughts. Short bouts of depression without suicidal thoughts I'm told is completely normal and affects 1 in 3 people throughout their lives over a 5 year period. There's no point trying to fight that because you're fighting human emotion in response to loss, or experience of pain due to empathy of another's suffering, and general grief. You CANNOT avoid it, so you should not fight it with medications that are well known to destroy your sleep architecture.
This drug, which once saved me, has basically gone on to ruin my life. Now, it's going to be a long road to recovery of my faculties, I need to sleep, and I'm getting meagre amounts as it is. It will improve no doubt, but please, if anyone is thinking of touching this stuff, make sure you understand my experience as a serious warning of what can happen when you decide to come off it. And no, slowly tapering off it won't work, do a quick taper. Go from say 60 to 45, then to 30 then to 15 over a period of say 1 month, then STOP. You will need to take Agomelatine (Valdoxan) for 7 to 10 days, after stopping Mirtazapine because you won't sleep a wink. After 7-10 days, STOP the Agomelatine, or it too will screw up your sleep architecture.
You will have trouble sleeping, yes, and you will need to take hot baths, hot showers, take some magnesium supplements (certain types) and listen to calming and peaceful music in a very dark room. Sugar and caffeine are big NO NOs. You need to do something for the racing thoughts and the lousy feeling you'll experience for about a month before you begin to start feeling better. It may not make you sleep any better but it will provide the right environment to help sleep.
I feel like kicking the Mirtazapine will be like my new anti-depressant - but one that will not require me to constantly refill prescriptions and be putting chemicals into my body that are not really supposed to be there.
As I said, I'll update this thread for all and sundry and write a journal of my progress.
The trouble with Mirtazapine is that it works on depression for a while, but then it craps out intermittently, leaving me feeling terrible, obsessive and thinking stupid thoughts, and yet I needed to take it as I was COMPLETELY unable to sleep without it.
It was also making me anxious too, because I remember feeling awful about things I couldn't change. That is anxiety to me, feeling bad about things you should be shrugging your shoulders about, since you can't control it and should be focusing on the future and most importantly the present.
So, I went onto Agomelatine for 10 days to reset my sleep pattern, this ALLOWED me to sleep whilst the Mirtazapine was being metabolized out of my system completely, then stopped taking Agomelatine since a week ago, since that, too, seems to screw with your sleep pattern on a long-term basis, from personal accounts I've heard about it.
Day 1 - no sleep AT ALL.
Day 2 - 2 hours of sleep, no dreaming.
Day 3 - 1.5 hours of sleep, no dreaming.
Day 4 - 2 hours of sleep, no dreaming. Itchiness, especially the legs.
Day 5 - 3.5 hours of sleep, a short dream. Terrible itchiness, the legs and feet.
Day 6 - Today - 4 hours of sleep, a longer dream than Day 5. Itchiness till there, but may improve.
Day 7 - ?...I will update this thread as my crisis progresses from terrible to much better, but I've been told it will take many months (perhaps even 3 to 6) before my sleep is back to what it was when I started using Mirtazapine back in the first quarter of 2004, which was basically 10 years ago give or take a couple weeks.
Anti-depressants - seriously, leave them alone unless you really have serious suicidal thoughts. Short bouts of depression without suicidal thoughts I'm told is completely normal and affects 1 in 3 people throughout their lives over a 5 year period. There's no point trying to fight that because you're fighting human emotion in response to loss, or experience of pain due to empathy of another's suffering, and general grief. You CANNOT avoid it, so you should not fight it with medications that are well known to destroy your sleep architecture.
This drug, which once saved me, has basically gone on to ruin my life. Now, it's going to be a long road to recovery of my faculties, I need to sleep, and I'm getting meagre amounts as it is. It will improve no doubt, but please, if anyone is thinking of touching this stuff, make sure you understand my experience as a serious warning of what can happen when you decide to come off it. And no, slowly tapering off it won't work, do a quick taper. Go from say 60 to 45, then to 30 then to 15 over a period of say 1 month, then STOP. You will need to take Agomelatine (Valdoxan) for 7 to 10 days, after stopping Mirtazapine because you won't sleep a wink. After 7-10 days, STOP the Agomelatine, or it too will screw up your sleep architecture.
You will have trouble sleeping, yes, and you will need to take hot baths, hot showers, take some magnesium supplements (certain types) and listen to calming and peaceful music in a very dark room. Sugar and caffeine are big NO NOs. You need to do something for the racing thoughts and the lousy feeling you'll experience for about a month before you begin to start feeling better. It may not make you sleep any better but it will provide the right environment to help sleep.
I feel like kicking the Mirtazapine will be like my new anti-depressant - but one that will not require me to constantly refill prescriptions and be putting chemicals into my body that are not really supposed to be there.
As I said, I'll update this thread for all and sundry and write a journal of my progress.
