I've been a full time junkie since November. It's really not fun anymore, but for some reason I keep putting it in my body. I've been messed up on drugs for so long now I can't remember what it's like to be sober. I really dont want to continue down this path anymore. My problem is, I'm worry that once I cut heroin out of my life nothing will ever come close to that level of joy. I feel like I'll spend the rest of my days never being able to fully appreciate anything good in life from here on out. Any lucky sober heroin addicts have any advice?
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Is there happiness after heroin addiction?
- Thread starter drink
- Start date
Hi Drink,
I can;t comment directly about Heroin but many people including myself struggle with that question when having immersed themselves in drug use.
It's a bit of a false question, 'normal' life won't be like being high on drugs, I'm not great with words but the w=reality you create around drugs is largely synthetic, brought and paid for in little wraps of paper and zip lock plastic bags. It's narrow and limited and focused solely on a chemically induced high.
'real' life is so much more if you put the work in, the world is a much richer experience without drugs but it takes time and work to really see that. Some would recommend meditation and relaxation and techniques, there is a wealth of information on such things online, I found Tia Chi helped me start to connect back to the earth and back to the wonder that can seem to be lacking when drugs are removed.
IMHO Nothing is more amazing beautiful and down right astounding than plain unadulterated reality, the hyard bit is being able to recognise it whilst is continues to stare us in the face
I can;t comment directly about Heroin but many people including myself struggle with that question when having immersed themselves in drug use.
It's a bit of a false question, 'normal' life won't be like being high on drugs, I'm not great with words but the w=reality you create around drugs is largely synthetic, brought and paid for in little wraps of paper and zip lock plastic bags. It's narrow and limited and focused solely on a chemically induced high.
'real' life is so much more if you put the work in, the world is a much richer experience without drugs but it takes time and work to really see that. Some would recommend meditation and relaxation and techniques, there is a wealth of information on such things online, I found Tia Chi helped me start to connect back to the earth and back to the wonder that can seem to be lacking when drugs are removed.
IMHO Nothing is more amazing beautiful and down right astounding than plain unadulterated reality, the hyard bit is being able to recognise it whilst is continues to stare us in the face
There's MORE happiness, more feeling, more life, more passion, more everything after heroin addiction than what you had while on dope. The doped up feeling you might get after a shot - it doesn't DO anything for you - it's just a fake feeling, as you should know by now it brings you no lasting satisfaction or
The thing about being clean is it's like you come back out of a cave, or like you've been living underwater for years and then you come back to life outside and up in the real world on the land, there are more chances and opportunities and you can actually go for them because your life isn't revolving around running from life with heroin or any other drug.
This is the hard part, having your mind and emotions come back online and reverting back to really being human instead of an extension of the poppy plant - it can be very intense and it takes at least a few months to really get over the feeling of emptiness - but as we all know here, you can feel totally empty while high too, like you're dead inside and it doesn't matter how good the bags are because it just is shit. You are going to be alive half a year from now, you could be living through feelings of being born again (without the religions and what not, but actually feeling like you're going through a rebirth), or you could still just be a junkie trying to get money and drugs and being totally numb to your own real feelings and thoughts and life.
It HONESTLY feels like you reconnect with your own life-force or something when you get clean, and you'd been wrapping it up / covering it up with a chemical for the duration of your addiction - it comes back and you become alive again with opportunity and freedom. You just have to be ready to do it because of a visceral knowing that you're done, not an abstract idea of "well drugs are bad for me and this sucks I guess so whatever I'll get clean", and look at the period of suffering through detox and paws mental symptoms as the debt you've incurred by putting off life with heroin / life rebooting your system and the "pain" of feeling again after so long living in synthetic contentment.
The thing about being clean is it's like you come back out of a cave, or like you've been living underwater for years and then you come back to life outside and up in the real world on the land, there are more chances and opportunities and you can actually go for them because your life isn't revolving around running from life with heroin or any other drug.
This is the hard part, having your mind and emotions come back online and reverting back to really being human instead of an extension of the poppy plant - it can be very intense and it takes at least a few months to really get over the feeling of emptiness - but as we all know here, you can feel totally empty while high too, like you're dead inside and it doesn't matter how good the bags are because it just is shit. You are going to be alive half a year from now, you could be living through feelings of being born again (without the religions and what not, but actually feeling like you're going through a rebirth), or you could still just be a junkie trying to get money and drugs and being totally numb to your own real feelings and thoughts and life.
It HONESTLY feels like you reconnect with your own life-force or something when you get clean, and you'd been wrapping it up / covering it up with a chemical for the duration of your addiction - it comes back and you become alive again with opportunity and freedom. You just have to be ready to do it because of a visceral knowing that you're done, not an abstract idea of "well drugs are bad for me and this sucks I guess so whatever I'll get clean", and look at the period of suffering through detox and paws mental symptoms as the debt you've incurred by putting off life with heroin / life rebooting your system and the "pain" of feeling again after so long living in synthetic contentment.
herbavore
Bluelight Crew
^What a great post, free.
OP, I think re-learning to be joyful is one of life's greatest adventures. As a little kid your feelings are natural and unedited--all of them from anger to fear to joy and contentment--they are immediate, visceral and not inhibited by thinking about them. As you grow older you start to become distanced from that purity of feeling. You start to have judgmental thoughts about your feelings such as, "this feeling is bad, this one is good" or "I will never be able to feel any other way" or "I am bad for feeling this way" etc. You start to feel ruled by the negative feelings because you focus on those the most--and why not? They are the unpleasant feelings and they bring up what is perhaps our biggest fear in life, that we are not in control. So you try to run from them by numbing them or denying them or simply shutting down. But unfortunately it is not just certain feelings that get shut down, it's all of them.
Learning to focus on joy when it occurs is a very empowering thing to do. It starts small. You notice when something makes you happy or moves you or brings you a feeling of peace. It may be something so small and seemingly insignificant and transitory that you think it could never be enough; it could never compete with the rush you felt from your DOC. This is where the re-learning comes in. You notice those moments, take time to savor them and honor them and before you know it you are experiencing more and more joy. Some of it is neuro-plasticity and some of it is simply agreeing to let the world amaze you for the short time that you get to be here.
I can understand how scary it feels. Fear is always the best teacher. Asking yourself specifically what you are afraid of (as you did in this thread) is such a powerful tool. It allows you to examine your thoughts at a deeper level and to change your thoughts consciously like any other habit you set out to change. Almost any trying situation can be completely turned on its head when you can say, "I am going to learn from this" rather than "I am going to suffer from this".
Good luck on your journey.
OP, I think re-learning to be joyful is one of life's greatest adventures. As a little kid your feelings are natural and unedited--all of them from anger to fear to joy and contentment--they are immediate, visceral and not inhibited by thinking about them. As you grow older you start to become distanced from that purity of feeling. You start to have judgmental thoughts about your feelings such as, "this feeling is bad, this one is good" or "I will never be able to feel any other way" or "I am bad for feeling this way" etc. You start to feel ruled by the negative feelings because you focus on those the most--and why not? They are the unpleasant feelings and they bring up what is perhaps our biggest fear in life, that we are not in control. So you try to run from them by numbing them or denying them or simply shutting down. But unfortunately it is not just certain feelings that get shut down, it's all of them.
Learning to focus on joy when it occurs is a very empowering thing to do. It starts small. You notice when something makes you happy or moves you or brings you a feeling of peace. It may be something so small and seemingly insignificant and transitory that you think it could never be enough; it could never compete with the rush you felt from your DOC. This is where the re-learning comes in. You notice those moments, take time to savor them and honor them and before you know it you are experiencing more and more joy. Some of it is neuro-plasticity and some of it is simply agreeing to let the world amaze you for the short time that you get to be here.
I can understand how scary it feels. Fear is always the best teacher. Asking yourself specifically what you are afraid of (as you did in this thread) is such a powerful tool. It allows you to examine your thoughts at a deeper level and to change your thoughts consciously like any other habit you set out to change. Almost any trying situation can be completely turned on its head when you can say, "I am going to learn from this" rather than "I am going to suffer from this".
Good luck on your journey.
aq.
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 22, 2012
- Messages
- 5,869
there absolutely is happiness after addiction.
as a matter of fact, I found myself to be more happier after my addiction than I was prior to it. while I was on drugs, I didn't care. I didn't stop to take in natural beauties. but now, I have a different perspective on life, living, etc. it took time, but I got there. you can too
as a matter of fact, I found myself to be more happier after my addiction than I was prior to it. while I was on drugs, I didn't care. I didn't stop to take in natural beauties. but now, I have a different perspective on life, living, etc. it took time, but I got there. you can too
After a while your body bounces back, and it's possible to enjoy things. The last time I used a bunch of heroin was like 2006. Everything good in life is still good. I have had a hard life where there hasn't been enough good things, but it's definitely possible. Of course it's not going to be like taking a hit of fucking drug that overloads your system, but life can be plenty good without that. It will definitely be horrible for a week and be shitty for a while after that. Then it's up to what you can get out of life.
herbavore
Bluelight Crew
qft
Maya
Bluelight Crew
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- 7,310
There is definitely happiness after heroin addiction. Our happiness is in our hands, we can choose to find happiness and in smaller things or set goals for ourselves to achieve happiness. What makes you happy OP is that question, what makes you happy besides the heroin addiction? Movies? Spending time with your family? Travelling, there are so much to life not only drugs OP, so much to experience and explore.
SineWaveSoldier
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2012
- Messages
- 500
Happiness starts once your mind is free of opiates. It really only takes a short period of time to start feeling and looking better. It's just staying away is the hard part.
Once you get clean you will remember what it is like to feel again. To laugh and be free without the terrible weight of what you are doing to yourself holding you down. To not have guilt and shame stuck to you, and the physical aspect, the monkey off your back.
Meeting new people, getting along with your family, saving money. Yeah it's all easily within your reach. It's up to you
Once you get clean you will remember what it is like to feel again. To laugh and be free without the terrible weight of what you are doing to yourself holding you down. To not have guilt and shame stuck to you, and the physical aspect, the monkey off your back.
Meeting new people, getting along with your family, saving money. Yeah it's all easily within your reach. It's up to you
Benwise
Bluelighter
Yeah there is. I am 10 months clean, texted my dealer and everything today because I was feeling eh...it's been a good 10 months but I could sure use that nice feeling that only heroin brings me. Anyways, hung out with a girl since dude wouldn't respond, I've been talking to her for like...a Damn long time. Long story short, got a rush comparable to heroin when I finally asked her out and she said yes. Craving has subsided, literally had chills because it was the exact rush and pick me up I needed. Some days are better than others. But when you have days like I just had (off heroin) you understand why it's all worth it.
Vaya
Bluelight Crew
There's absolutely happiness after heroin addiction - take it from me!!
It is, after all, a matter of getting through the withdrawal stages - both physical and psychological (and spiritual, if you will). Sometimes, if your use has been especially problematic, you have PAWS (post-acute withdrawal syndrome) to contend with. This can last a while, so please be prepared for that. You can also be prepared, however, to come to know a happiness greater in recovery than you may have ever felt in active addiction. You will have known what it truly is to have been to hell and back; your happy days in sobriety will take on a whole new meaning now that you have come to know all-too well the monotonous drudgery of heroin addiction.
After plowing through the withdrawal comes the maintenance of your sober lifestyle stage. This is where most people get tripped up, because life isn't necessarily "easy" at first and, after all - why should it be easy? You've been getting quick fixes this whole time... so having to work for pleasure rubs against the very grain of people like ours' natures! This, however, is normal. Bear that entirely in mind. It does get better. We can, and do, get better if we try to maintain that precious something that is a sober lifestyle.
Are you interested in full recovery as in full sobriety? I might, in that case, point you towards our Sober Living forum (I could also move this thread there) if you're interested in more of a target audience for your questions... I do very highly recommend giving that forum a look-see regardless, by the way!
Thanks for your question...
All the best to you,
~ Vaya
It is, after all, a matter of getting through the withdrawal stages - both physical and psychological (and spiritual, if you will). Sometimes, if your use has been especially problematic, you have PAWS (post-acute withdrawal syndrome) to contend with. This can last a while, so please be prepared for that. You can also be prepared, however, to come to know a happiness greater in recovery than you may have ever felt in active addiction. You will have known what it truly is to have been to hell and back; your happy days in sobriety will take on a whole new meaning now that you have come to know all-too well the monotonous drudgery of heroin addiction.
After plowing through the withdrawal comes the maintenance of your sober lifestyle stage. This is where most people get tripped up, because life isn't necessarily "easy" at first and, after all - why should it be easy? You've been getting quick fixes this whole time... so having to work for pleasure rubs against the very grain of people like ours' natures! This, however, is normal. Bear that entirely in mind. It does get better. We can, and do, get better if we try to maintain that precious something that is a sober lifestyle.
Are you interested in full recovery as in full sobriety? I might, in that case, point you towards our Sober Living forum (I could also move this thread there) if you're interested in more of a target audience for your questions... I do very highly recommend giving that forum a look-see regardless, by the way!
Thanks for your question...
All the best to you,
~ Vaya
bunnyrabbitz
Bluelighter
Yes, although it is a long and arduous path.
heroinbliss
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Apr 29, 2016
- Messages
- 14
Hello, I know this is an old post. But I have to say something if you are still out there and active on your account. I used to be a pretty bad heroin addict. I know thats pretty subjective but in my world, I felt pretty bad. I was spending 40-60 per day on heroin. I was smoking crack and taking various pharmaceuticals. I was extremely depressed. The only time I felt at ease was when I was high but that was short lived.
I got off the drugs and I was miserable for weeks. I was drinking alcohol every day to cope with the anxiety and depression.
8 months later and I'm feeling much better. I'm off the hard drugs finally. I have found true happiness. It's much better. There was a time where I was in your shoes. I was lost and didn't know if I would ever be happy again.
You will get there. Take it from me.
I hope you're doing well and if you're still stuck in the abyss of drugs. Get off them. It's so worth it.
Take care.
I got off the drugs and I was miserable for weeks. I was drinking alcohol every day to cope with the anxiety and depression.
8 months later and I'm feeling much better. I'm off the hard drugs finally. I have found true happiness. It's much better. There was a time where I was in your shoes. I was lost and didn't know if I would ever be happy again.
You will get there. Take it from me.
I hope you're doing well and if you're still stuck in the abyss of drugs. Get off them. It's so worth it.
Take care.
That was my biggest fear about H before I tried it. I was afraid that if it was so good as they said, I would never be able to realy enjoy anything after. But finally I tried it, (not shooted it, tbh) and relized that it's not even close to be the most pleasurfull shit in the world. I still enjoy hooliganism, sex, ephoric drugs other than H, even taking a hot shower as much I did before H.
If you say it's not even fan for u anymore, I guess that be would your case too.
But, let's assume that's not ur case. Suposing when you started heroin it was the best feel you ever had. I know some people that were like that. They still enjoy pleasurfull things as much as everyone else. Some of them, enjoy thigs I don't even find enjoyable.
So if that is all you worry about, don't worry. Go on, life will be better after addiction, I promise.
xbandit07x
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2016
- Messages
- 554
Maybe not. But you can be happy figuring out how to stop being a fiend and maybe even take suboxone or something
somnilicious
Bluelighter
it's not that anything in life could ever be pleasurable after experiencing herion because it was so much better than everyday life that makes it difficult to feel pleasure after getting sober. It's the adjustments your brain makes after repeated heroin use. PAWS is a real thing and a physiological manifestation that can make it a trying process for even those with the strongest psychological fortitude. Quite simply.. Your brain needs time to heal and start functioning properly and for long time users this can often be a longer journey than expected.
Cdkman
Bluelighter
It comes down to your definition of happiness..thats just tbe craving for heroin making u think u will never be happy..heroin will get so deep in your head it will control your thoughts, your feelings
After you are off opiates for a while you will not have the same mind set as u do meow because you will be grounded with a sober mind..
Of course there is "happiness" after heroin but the happiness will be living a full and rich life
After you are off opiates for a while you will not have the same mind set as u do meow because you will be grounded with a sober mind..
Of course there is "happiness" after heroin but the happiness will be living a full and rich life
vancity
Bluelighter
Hey man, definitely been in your shoes and can give you my first hand experience of getting off heroin and being happy sober. I shot dope and coke for years and years and decided to finally get clean..been 3 years now, and can honestly say Ive never been so happy in my entire life. Yes, the first few months absolutely sucked and I was very depressed, but I kept on going, got involved in NA and made a lot of friends. I slowly built my life up to where it is now and could never imagine going back. I literally no longer even think about heroin, or very little at least. Time and 12 steps has healed my brain to such a point that having fun and enjoying simple things is easier to do...So what Im saying is give it some time, because your mentality will shift and you will no longer think they way youre thinking now. Give it a try, youll see what im talking about!
d3athadone
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2015
- Messages
- 264
November?? Your at that perfect time man, Quit now. I been at this since 2008. FUcking nightmare like you wouldnt believe. Just cold turkey. DOnt be a baby.