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I'm addicted to heroin and I have no friends

Dr.DOB

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 20, 2007
Messages
446
Location
Europa
but I never have. even right now I have amazing euphoria and I keep nodding out but I want to be with somebody so badly. I went to the club last night and danced the entire time and would go up to girls and just say hello and they would completely ignore me, then I see guys come up from behind and just start grinding on them and then they let them even though they barely even turn around.

I went on dating sites and messaged over 100 girls and got 3 replies then they stopped, and I made a really good account too because I have a good job and I'm young and cute. Today I did the highest dose I've ever done and I feel great but nobody here to keep my company. There was a rave tonight but its 90 minute drive and its only 16+ so lots of jail bate bitchs but I'm a teacher so even seeing them in small clothes is bad.

I don't even have a heroin hook anymore but this girl wants some do you think I should do it with her she will surely put out but I barely feel the sex when I'm on it but she loves me on it because I can keep fucking forever and never cum. She hates our sex life because I cum so fast despite I wank 3x a day religiously. I feel so dam amazing right now but whats the point, I don't really know how to enjoy life without drugs/company,:|:|:| how do you go about that?

this is what I'm addicted to
mordao.jpg

Thats the most I've ever done and I just did it like 5 minutes ago and I just threw up just now...I never thought ever that I would be but everybody says that though. I keep seeing people in the corner of my eye but I live alone ;_;

I didn't sleep at all last night because I did amphetamines and some ativan so I'm technically on amps, benzos, heroin, and thc. At the club so I could dance but it didn't help me get a girl I guess I can't dance but the other dudes would just start rubbing their groins on the girls behinds and they would let them WTFFFF, I'm prolly going to pass out wasting my last H when I could have had a sexcapade, I make such poor decisions, selfish ones, but I was so depressed about wasting my money @ a club to get stiffed. I hate my life.
 
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heroin is ruining your life. imo, quit or die.

your life won't get any better until you stop using. there is free help available through NA if you decide that you want to live.

<3 to you
 
its all about confidence dude. the heroin and drugs are wearing you down. your confidence levels and self esteem are probably at an all time low, and that's pretty easy to pick up on. especially with girls, who can sense that like a shark with blood in water. the whole girls letting guys rub up on them at the club thing...it happens. they're there to have fun. when you start to take things like that personally and internalize it, you're gonna be visually vulnerable...which is less attractive to girls than some random drunk guy rubbing up on them. then with the rejection you experienced, you go back to heroin, and the cycle perpetuates itself.

in my opinion, backed by experience with opiate addiction, you're gonna have to do some major major work on yourself before you can find anybody else. you're gonna have be happy with yourself first. and IMO there's a 99.9% chance you're gonna have to give up the heroin for that to happen.
 
1. Stop doing all drugs
2. Be somebody worth being around

Everything else will take care of itself if you do these two things. Otherwise, you'll likely end up dead and alone (not necessarily in that order).
 
I was addicted to heroin for something like 7 years. I can't give you an exact number because I just don't remember the year when it started. It's a horrible lifestyle, if you can call it 'life' at all. I went to jail 5 times. I finally OD'd April 21, 2010, the day I went back to jail for the 5th time. I had only been out of jail for 3 weeks when that happened. Please come to the realization that it's not just yourself that you're hurting. It's everyone that you come in contact with. I'm hurting right now because I don't know if what I'm typing can help you. All I want is for you to stop using, although I know that you're the only one who can help you. What I mean by that is: Until you honestly ask for help, knowing in your heart that you want to stop, people can offer you all the help in the world but it won't do any good. It's an awakening in your heart and soul that happens when you least expect it. p.s. just so you know, after several months clean you will probably last longer in bed than you ever have sober before. Not to mention that you will look and feel healthier and therefore will attract more attractive and healthier women. TRUST ME WHEN I SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;) Your only hope is that which you feed yourself. When you quit, LIFE IMPROVES!!!!!!!!!! I got out of jail September 8, 2010, and I still don't have a job. It's tough for felons in this economy. But my life is still AMAZING! I have my health and my parents told me that the best christmas present I could have given them is my sobriety. They believe in me, and that is the best christmas present they could have given me. It took me dying to finally stop. That's bad because if I hadn't been found by my dad sitting on the toilet with my pants around my ankles, head between my knees, vomit clogging my throat, within minutes or seconds of when he had, I wouldn't be here to share my experiences in hopes that you won't have to repeat them in your own way. I love you, brother, and I do know the hopelessness that you feel. Fuck that, though, because that's just a lie you're telling yourself. AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT DEAD, THERE IS HOPE. LOVE. LIFE. And all of the joys that come with it. I'll stop typing now, although I could go on for longer than there are words on the internet. LOVE YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!
 
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