i was always told, don't ask for permission; just ask for forgivness.

[Alprazolam8129]

Alright, i'm gonna vent a lil but read on if you like.
I've been through alot since the age of 13, im 19 now and have my own house and a job at a snowboarding mountian in the winter and as a paintball worker in the spring and summer.

I have money, i felt what real love feels like, ive tryed so many drugs, im suprized i'm still alive.. I once made a list and there were 45 exactly But i'm disgraced about it, but i'm not gonna get off topic. Im just always searching for more. I felt the feelings of sex, i had a kid that had to be killed for abortion cause i just wasn't ready. It was just a one night stand.. but then after that i found my first love and if anyone saw my profile pic before you seen me and her before.

I thought we were gonna last forever, but it turned out for a year and 9 months she was fucking with my head and lost feelings for me, which obviously when she said she loved me she said it in vein. I remember when i first came to this site and learned all this shit about drugs.. but who knew i was just destroying myself even more, even though its a "harm reduction" site. Don't get me wrong, i love the site and all but. I belive i have extreme anxiety, and severe depression and social anxiety. And i'm addicted to this life of getting any type of drugs to get me spaced away from my problems. But it always comes back. I'm just asking for ideas and just..
help.

 

[TINK]

I have been here almost 11 years, to me this site is not about drugs. Of course, we have all been drawn to this site for that common denominator, the drugs. But, the great thing about this place is that no one passes judgement on you. Either way they have been there or are going through it right now.

This may should a litle cheesey, but BL changed my life. I met 2 of my best friends on this site and a boyfriend (we were together 7 years, on a break right now). I have been a bridesmaid in a wedding from someone I met on here, another's family has adopted me like I was one of their own children. I could probaby visit most ny state in the US and have somewhere to stay (with a BLR).

So, if you think of this a just a drug board, you are missing the whole point. The main focus of this site first and foremost is harm reduction. And, I feel the greatest thing you can gain from being here is making connections with people here that understand 100% what you are going through.

Also, sounds to me like you might be self medicating. I would go see a doctor, let them know about your anxiety and depression. After gettin that under cntrol, I would start focusing on getting clean and sober and prepare to live a wonderful like. You are 19 years old for fucks sake.... you have the world at your feet. Go for it, you deserve to be happy!!

 

[Mehm]

Are you taking an Omega-3 supplement? If not you need to get on about 6 grams per day immediately. It won't solve all of your problems but I guarantee it will help with the depression and anxiety.

Good luck man. Life is FULL of ups and downs. It sounds like you pretty much have your shit together with the two jobs and what not. Maybe check out some classes at the community college, try some yoga, save up money and go travel in another country, head to an NA class if you feel like your life is out of control from the drugs. Do WHATEVER!

Like Tink said, you have your whole life ahead of you. Eat right, exercise, make sure you are getting the right nutrition (Omega-3s are huge), and expand your spirituality....just some suggestions from a fellow human

peace!

 

[Issac Sinclair]

What separates us from the rest of the world is we recognize a problem and we try to fix it. Through drug use, but at least we know we have a problem and attempt to fix it. Now you should really think about getting off the drugs. I am still really not that good yet, but you know your problem. Its something you can fix.

And I need to take fish oil supplements, thanks Mehm.

 

[shady4091]

I have been here almost 11 years, to me this site is not about drugs. Of course, we have all been drawn to this site for that common denominator, the drugs. But, the great thing about this place is that no one passes judgement on you. Either way they have been there or are going through it right now.

This may should a litle cheesey, but BL changed my life. I met 2 of my best friends on this site and a boyfriend (we were together 7 years, on a break right now). I have been a bridesmaid in a wedding from someone I met on here, another's family has adopted me like I was one of their own children. I could probaby visit most ny state in the US and have somewhere to stay (with a BLR).

So, if you think of this a just a drug board, you are missing the whole point. The main focus of this site first and foremost is harm reduction. And, I feel the greatest thing you can gain from being here is making connections with people here that understand 100% what you are going through.

Also, sounds to me like you might be self medicating. I would go see a doctor, let them know about your anxiety and depression. After gettin that under cntrol, I would start focusing on getting clean and sober and prepare to live a wonderful like. You are 19 years old for fucks sake.... you have the world at your feet. Go for it, you deserve to be happy!!

Wow, that's really cool that you've made so many close connections on here.

 

[SkagKush]

^ ya that is pretty cool......i really enjoyed reading your post TINK.........

i can already feel that vibe here, although there are some others who start to ruin it for others......