Mental Health I don't trust myself/ how to gain control with addictive personality?

[Legally High]

I have been in the cycle for soooo long of giving in then regret and guilt. Thousands of times I've begged myself only to wake and avoid/escape into emptyness.
Before drugs it was video games, sweets, masterbation. I would literally play video games all day growing up. Eventually I didn't want to anymore. And I couldn't stop though I badly wanted to, like a addict....

....that is until I started using drugs and lost interest in video games and everything I cared about.

Masterbation has never been overcome.

So as you can imagine drugs are not nice to me.

How can people like us make it in society?

 

[Jmr828]

I have the same issues with addiction. Mine being alchohol and sex particularly with strangers. I have done rehab, intensive out patient, meds, AA. I always end up right back in the dark hole again.
I am at the very first stages 2 days of not drinking waho. I highly recommend reading Healing the Addicted Brain. Great book and I am really not a book reader. Also, mainly because of getting really drunk last week and passing out I wasn't conscious enough to clear my phone hubby saw a bunch of naked pics I took and emails with very descriptive sexual content from Craigslist casual encounters... not the 1st, 2nd, 3rd or 4th time this has happened. Ultimatums are made. I'm getting the vivitrol shot Monday. Best of luck! Read that book it explains alot!