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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

TDS I can't seem to keep it together long enough to do anything productive.

O

OxyAddict25

Greenlighter
Joined
May 15, 2013
Messages
22
Location
Huntington, WV
It's like 1 step forward 3 steps back for me. I get going in a good direction and then something comes along and derails me. It's like God or some other superior being is just fucking with me and I really feel like I am an ant and there is some mean ass kid burning me with a magnifying glass. The only thing I have to turn to is the stuff I know isn't good for me and without it I just want to curl up and die. I just cut up an M box to help ease my mind a little but I know it will only be a temporary fix for what seems like a never ending problem :|

I also just found out I am -45.39 in the hole and my paycheck from work was supposed to be deposited in my account yesterday and rent is due this coming Monday. One of my summer classes starts on Monday as well so I won't be able to focus on class knowing I am going to be behind on rent. So I am essentially fucked at the moment :!
 
OxyAddict25 said:
It's like 1 step forward 3 steps back for me. I get going in a good direction and then something comes along and derails me. It's like God or some other superior being is just fucking with me and I really feel like I am an ant and there is some mean ass kid burning me with a magnifying glass. The only thing I have to turn to is the stuff I know isn't good for me and without it I just want to curl up and die. I just cut up an M box to help ease my mind a little but I know it will only be a temporary fix for what seems like a never ending problem :|

I also just found out I am -45.39 in the hole and my paycheck from work was supposed to be deposited in my account yesterday and rent is due this coming Monday. One of my summer classes starts on Monday as well so I won't be able to focus on class knowing I am going to be behind on rent. So I am essentially fucked at the moment :!
Click to expand...

I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through man.

Just know that things will get better if you do your best, and keep aiming for that.
 
I just sucked up my fucking riduculous elitist ego (that cannot be backed up) and went and did the "therapeutic" thing- carpentry outdoor for 2 weeks... tough labor and absolute isolation, going insane.
I start something, it gets going well, then inevitable i cn't kep up with twhatever monster Ive created (jobs, sports, drugs) and nuclear meltdpown occurrs
I want to die at some point every day
 
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