Hysterectomies

[zephyr]

OK: I am 36 and have not had kids, have never been that interested in having them and am not in a committed relationship with someone I would consider having kids with at the moment. I have two adorable nieces and my sister was not maternally minded either until she had hers and has really changed into a great motherly woman and says I would regret later not having them.

Unfortunately for me though I won't get the chance as I will be having a hysterectomy due to a tumour. Its no big deal, totally benign but its so large that it must come out.

Has anyone else had a hsterectomy and what can I expect afterwards? Apparently I will have to learn to walk again, which I don't get- wtf does the uterus have to do with my legs?

And also sex wise, I am single but not celibate, I have a great sex life- but have not told my guy about this as I am afraid he will either be too scared off to touch me again or I may not feel like ever having sex again.

Also the kid factor- this is going to cancel out any future kids I could have. Am I seriously missing out?

 

[Miss_vanilla]

You're very young to have this done ... not that I haven't heard of it at any age. Your recovery will depend on the type of hysterectomy and your general fitness and health prior to the surgery. Not sure about the learning to walk but you will be expected to get out of bed pretty early after the surgery (I think the next day/morning) and will need to walk around to improve blood flow to your extremities, to prevent blood clots and allow the anaesthetic to leave your body. I think some people can experience leg numbness afterwards because it is pretty major and blood flow is interrupted during surgery.

I could go on. I've not had this experience myself but have family members who've had this done. You should ask your specialist all the questions he or she hasn't covered - don't be afraid to, that's part of their job in preparing you for the surgery. You could also access state gov. sites for more info.

I don't have any kids and can't have them (don't want to go into it particularly). I wasn't sure about having children when I was younger (am 28 now) due to a dodgy childhood, but, there's nothing quite like being told you cant have/do something to make you sit up and take notice! I did experience some loss when I was told I couldn't have them but I've worked through that. You might need some counselling or if you're lucky enough to have good people in your life, have a bit of a vent to them.

I think having children is one of those things you can't really imagine unless you do it. I can only tell you that your health is the most important thing right now and to maybe discuss with your specialist storing your eggs for future use if that is possible in your situation or if that is something you want to do. It's not a sure thing, and the chance of success isn't high, but you would at least have a chance.

I can't stress enough to discuss your concerns with your doctor, not that it's bad to get ideas from other people who've experienced this, but you also need to get some realistic advice from your doc as well as develop a good relationship with them.

Hope it all goes well for you! Look after yourself leading up to the operation and make sure there is somebody to look after you afterwards, both physically and psychologically.

 

[Lysis]

zephyr, I'm glad to see you back, but I'm sad it's for this reason. My friend had this done at 33, and she was very depressed about it. She too had to have it done for health reasons. You sound a little like her. She was not interested in kids, but when faced with the issue, she started to wonder if she was missing out.

I would ask yourself if you are thinking about kids purely because of this reason, and would you be thinking the same as always had you not gotten the news. I just turned 37 and I know I only have a few years. I keep going back and forth, but right now I'm happy with my dog. lol You're not a horrible person for not wanting kids, and you have nieces to spoil without the headache of dealing with them when they get arrested, pregnant, hurt, or otherwise in trouble somehow or supporting them through college and school.

Also, can you get a second opinion from another doctor?

I don't know about walking. I've not heard of that, and I don't think my friend went through that, but maybe she hid that from me? It's possible. It's not something girls like to talk about.

I can see a man being afraid to stick it in and hurting you. I can see that happening, but men are men lol I doubt very much he will be disgusted by you or not want to have sex with you.

You're very young to have this done ... not that I haven't heard of it at any age. Your recovery will depend on the type of hysterectomy and your general fitness and health prior to the surgery. Not sure about the learning to walk but you will be expected to get out of bed pretty early after the surgery (I think the next day/morning) and will need to walk around to improve blood flow to your extremities, to prevent blood clots and allow the anaesthetic to leave your body. I think some people can experience leg numbness afterwards because it is pretty major and blood flow is interrupted during surgery.

Yes, I had to do this too when I had surgery. Mine was not major (laparascopy), but they had all the fun stuff on my legs and then had me walk around. Maybe it was the nature of my surgery, but I didn't have any problem walking. It was awkward and there was a little numbness, but not like I couldn't walk after moving around a bit (which hurt but pain meds helped that).

 

[littlepenguin]

My ma had a tumor the size of a football in her uterus, so she had a hysterectomy. I took care of her for weeks after, but I don't remember anything about her not being able to walk. I really shouldn't share the following story about it, because my goal is not to scare you by any means, but what happened to my ma was hideous.
She was very very weak to begin with, before the surgery. Her hemoglobin was around a 2-3 (a normal healthy person's hemoglobin is around 10-12, even 10 being a little low). She was extremely anemic. Her recovery was taking a little longer than planned, but she shed a lot of excess weight and was starting to feel great, except for a lump under the incision that was kind of infected and really hard. She went into the doctor and he glanced at it and said it was 'all in her head.' About a week and a half later, the spot was weeping heavily and red, and she had a temperature. We went in and demanded that she be seen by another doc and have an x-ray or something done to figure out what was going on. X-ray time. Oops, they left a scissors in her. A FREAKING SCISSORS. They have people in the surgery room, where their only job is to count the number of instruments used before and after the surgery just to make sure an incident like this doesn't happen. So, she got the scissors removed and I have been encouraging her to get a lawyer for years and get a hell of a payment out of it. She doesn't want to, but hey, there's really no reason not to, I say.
Anyway, after that was taken care of, she was feeling fantastic. Lost 100 lbs. Color in her skin, doing fantastically. She did say that dealing with the immediate onset of menopause was difficult. Hot flashes up the yin yang, insomnia, tiredness, etc. I assume the doctor will provide you with hormones to combat some of these issues.

I wish you a speedy recovery and the best of luck in your surgery