Anon_Alias
Greenlighter
Hello,
Obviously I didn't use my normal alias as I don't want people to know who I am. I've delved into the world of fame and can be found probably via my IP alone, so I trust that in me saying this my privacy will be respect (as long as my normal name doesn't appear on a standard Google search I'm fine) to a certain degree. I'm not interested in not being unaccountable for my actions and/or questions; I just don't want a relation to who I am as a person being a reflection of drugs.
Having said that, I feel like I should be clear when I say that I've used nearly every substance in the world. I've come to terms with addiction publicly, and I have certain and specific questions. I would prefer intelligible answers to my questions rather than opinions, because I'm seeking information. If you aren't following me this far, please don't reply, and be prepared for a miniature God damned Bible.
My psychedelic experience began with marijuana, which in turn exacerbated an underlying PTSD. When I discovered alcohol at the ripe age of 14, I imbibed. It relieved anxiety, ultimately to my demise and left with cirrhosis at 25. I'm 31 now, and I've accepted mortality. I've also experienced a life lived very fast which helped with mortality. I feel like I've done enough.
My questions are based on chemistry, science and theory. They are not based on philosophy, personal opinions or experience nor health.
I would like to know exactly what "freebasing" is. I want to know if a sub-ohm vaporizer will essentially do that same as a freebase, as mine is adjustable in every way possible. I'm mildly curious on the effects of inhaling "fillers" in pharmaceutical drugs, stressing mildly. I do not IV drugs, and I've been prone to IN. Hydromorphone specifically, but also the Adderall. I've been using both drugs for some time now, and I've enjoyed the IN Hydromorphone, but I don't think I've given the oral much of a chance. I'm not looking for the rush, and I've also crushed and smoked both of these drugs on top of a cigarette. I would wet the cigarette on the top with my saliva, and take slow yet large drags as to not canoe the cigarette. The rush from each wasn't great, but it was extremely present. I completely lost consciousness once using the drugs this way.
My second question is regarding bioavailability and ROAs, but in a more specific way. Does the BA literally mean how much of the drug will enter your system via the ROA? Also, is there a direct correlation to the half-life of the drug? My favorite part of the hydromorphone is the nodding. It is not the rush or the high. I want to be in a state of in and out of awake, comfortable, and without pain. To achieve that kind of high, what is the most affective ROA for hydromorphone? I pose the same question for Adderall, but my desired effect is simply to be alert. I do not want any high at all from this drug, and I have experienced it. I don't want a fast rate, no fucking rollercoasters. Just a calm focus, what is the most effective ROA and how does it relate to BA?
I've put a small amount of both pharmaceuticals in my nicotine vaporizer tonight, and I vomited 20 minutes afterwards. I'm fine now, and my heart rate is stabilized and I'm awake. I feel unsatisfied with both drugs however, as I would have if I had taken them orally. My doses are 4MG Hydro / 40MG Adderall daily. I did not exceed either. I would also like to know about water solubility and how it affects the way the drug is administered. Does the glycerin from the tobacco make it more bioavailable? If I mixed the drugs in water, and added small drops into my nicotine, would they blend? Would they absorb, etc?
Third, I've been experimenting with mushrooms. They are nothing like marijuana to me personally, but they have definitely made me feel grounded and sane in this universe. I feel calm, at ease, but I cannot continue for more than 2 or 3 weeks at a time because I started to wonder if I'm losing touch with the world or if everyone else is out of touch. It essentially makes me feel like I've gone in a giant circle from birth to death, including the deconstruction of the ego. Each time around, I feel better however. I do find myself wondering if this all in my head, but that is okay with me because my mind is part of me. I'm not paranoid, and I expect to experience a different state each and every time. I do feel like it helped with the inevitable death sentence due to my fourth question. I guess the question is, has anyone else experienced this kind of peace and clarity -- as far as saying that they can admit they addicted to drugs and how shameless that is and irrelevant to our mere existence? Often it feels like if I had done anything else but exactly what I had done, and written these questions, the world would fall apart, and atoms would split. The world would explode, therefor there is nothing I can do that is "right" or "wrong". We are born (the happiest day for everyone) just to die (the worst day for everyone) and disappoint, and I wouldn't want it any other way.
Four -- Is alcohol the worst drug in the world, and is there anything that any of us can do to avoid this addiction? To me, it feels like we are just waiting and wasting our time until our next "high" whether it be drugs, orgasm, love, hate, or whatever makes you still feel alive on this planet. Biding time until the next one begins, and is there any alternative (safer and less liver toxic) to this fucking poison?
I'm looking forward to responses, and please excuse any typos. I'm not going to reread my TL;DR. Thanks for your time.
Sincerely,
_________________________
Obviously I didn't use my normal alias as I don't want people to know who I am. I've delved into the world of fame and can be found probably via my IP alone, so I trust that in me saying this my privacy will be respect (as long as my normal name doesn't appear on a standard Google search I'm fine) to a certain degree. I'm not interested in not being unaccountable for my actions and/or questions; I just don't want a relation to who I am as a person being a reflection of drugs.
Having said that, I feel like I should be clear when I say that I've used nearly every substance in the world. I've come to terms with addiction publicly, and I have certain and specific questions. I would prefer intelligible answers to my questions rather than opinions, because I'm seeking information. If you aren't following me this far, please don't reply, and be prepared for a miniature God damned Bible.
My psychedelic experience began with marijuana, which in turn exacerbated an underlying PTSD. When I discovered alcohol at the ripe age of 14, I imbibed. It relieved anxiety, ultimately to my demise and left with cirrhosis at 25. I'm 31 now, and I've accepted mortality. I've also experienced a life lived very fast which helped with mortality. I feel like I've done enough.
My questions are based on chemistry, science and theory. They are not based on philosophy, personal opinions or experience nor health.
I would like to know exactly what "freebasing" is. I want to know if a sub-ohm vaporizer will essentially do that same as a freebase, as mine is adjustable in every way possible. I'm mildly curious on the effects of inhaling "fillers" in pharmaceutical drugs, stressing mildly. I do not IV drugs, and I've been prone to IN. Hydromorphone specifically, but also the Adderall. I've been using both drugs for some time now, and I've enjoyed the IN Hydromorphone, but I don't think I've given the oral much of a chance. I'm not looking for the rush, and I've also crushed and smoked both of these drugs on top of a cigarette. I would wet the cigarette on the top with my saliva, and take slow yet large drags as to not canoe the cigarette. The rush from each wasn't great, but it was extremely present. I completely lost consciousness once using the drugs this way.
My second question is regarding bioavailability and ROAs, but in a more specific way. Does the BA literally mean how much of the drug will enter your system via the ROA? Also, is there a direct correlation to the half-life of the drug? My favorite part of the hydromorphone is the nodding. It is not the rush or the high. I want to be in a state of in and out of awake, comfortable, and without pain. To achieve that kind of high, what is the most affective ROA for hydromorphone? I pose the same question for Adderall, but my desired effect is simply to be alert. I do not want any high at all from this drug, and I have experienced it. I don't want a fast rate, no fucking rollercoasters. Just a calm focus, what is the most effective ROA and how does it relate to BA?
I've put a small amount of both pharmaceuticals in my nicotine vaporizer tonight, and I vomited 20 minutes afterwards. I'm fine now, and my heart rate is stabilized and I'm awake. I feel unsatisfied with both drugs however, as I would have if I had taken them orally. My doses are 4MG Hydro / 40MG Adderall daily. I did not exceed either. I would also like to know about water solubility and how it affects the way the drug is administered. Does the glycerin from the tobacco make it more bioavailable? If I mixed the drugs in water, and added small drops into my nicotine, would they blend? Would they absorb, etc?
Third, I've been experimenting with mushrooms. They are nothing like marijuana to me personally, but they have definitely made me feel grounded and sane in this universe. I feel calm, at ease, but I cannot continue for more than 2 or 3 weeks at a time because I started to wonder if I'm losing touch with the world or if everyone else is out of touch. It essentially makes me feel like I've gone in a giant circle from birth to death, including the deconstruction of the ego. Each time around, I feel better however. I do find myself wondering if this all in my head, but that is okay with me because my mind is part of me. I'm not paranoid, and I expect to experience a different state each and every time. I do feel like it helped with the inevitable death sentence due to my fourth question. I guess the question is, has anyone else experienced this kind of peace and clarity -- as far as saying that they can admit they addicted to drugs and how shameless that is and irrelevant to our mere existence? Often it feels like if I had done anything else but exactly what I had done, and written these questions, the world would fall apart, and atoms would split. The world would explode, therefor there is nothing I can do that is "right" or "wrong". We are born (the happiest day for everyone) just to die (the worst day for everyone) and disappoint, and I wouldn't want it any other way.
Four -- Is alcohol the worst drug in the world, and is there anything that any of us can do to avoid this addiction? To me, it feels like we are just waiting and wasting our time until our next "high" whether it be drugs, orgasm, love, hate, or whatever makes you still feel alive on this planet. Biding time until the next one begins, and is there any alternative (safer and less liver toxic) to this fucking poison?
I'm looking forward to responses, and please excuse any typos. I'm not going to reread my TL;DR. Thanks for your time.
Sincerely,
_________________________
