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How love has made me quit drugs.

forestman4

forestman4

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 5, 2016
Messages
236
Location
India
Today I broke a promise I made to the woman I love.

And she only cared to reply about the fact that I broke a promise. So now I decided to promise her that I'm going to quit everything.

I can't put up with the overdoses and fights with my parents and the fucked up lungs just so I can forget her when all I ever wanted was to love her.

For fuck sake, I just quit everything,I just want to dedicated myself to hopefully wining her love and becoming rich. (More richer than I already am)
 
Love can function as a drug.

So, really, you haven't quit anything.

You have swapped the witch for the bitch, literally.

Perhaps try remaining abstinent and not falling in love for a year.

There is plenty of porn on the internet.

Good luck.
 
Must it be all or nothing ?

Sounds a bit too absolutist for me. Remind me to start a thread on how drugs made me quit love.

Don't make promises you can't keep.

Better yet don't make promises. Nobody can predict what's going to go down in the future.
 
If you're doing something to try to please someone else you're sort of setting yourself up for failure whether it's a relationship or anything really. It's taken me a while to learn that. And why do you think you need to be rich to win someone over?
 
Vagina Lover said:
Love can function as a drug.

So, really, you haven't quit anything.

You have swapped the witch for the bitch, literally.

Perhaps try remaining abstinent and not falling in love for a year.

There is plenty of porn on the internet.

Good luck.
Click to expand...

yeah trollololol

on a side note, quit drugs for you if that's what you need to do

at the same time give us more info on what you were doing/how it was messing your life up?

a relationship that could potentially fail is no strong foundation to build on what sounds like a needed sobriety
 
Good luck, forestman4.
Don't let negative posts discourage you - if your relationship inspires you to clean up, why not?
There are no black and white rules about addiction and cleaning up.
If you want to make a positive change in your life for the sake of your partner, i say good on you :)
Anything that motivates you can't be a bad thing.
 
spacejunk said:
Anything that motivates you can't be a bad thing.
Click to expand...

trudat

after cutting out numerous substances IME it has to be a case of you not liking what they do to you anymore

once you dont like what they are making you into then thats the hard part done
 
Are they 2 sides of the same coin? I got into heroin at a young age. H is like a warm hug. It was a surrogate for the love i never got fron my parents. I fell in love snd quit heroin. Then i fell out of love and took it back up. This is how it had been for yea4s. Back and forth. Years off and yars on it.
 
forestman4 said:
You have to be rich to pick up any chick these days..
Click to expand...
i get criticism whenever i say this, but that applies most strongly to Americanized Women. It is so obvious - at a party an American Woman asks me what i do. I say im a scientist trying to find the cure for Parkinsons Disease. She knows scientists dont earn much money so she runs. At the end of the party she goes home with the investment banker who bored me to tears an hour ago. Happens every time. But i talk to an asian or south american and ahe goes home with me. They are among the most materialistic women in the world. Same for a lot of Western European women. I try yo avoid them and date women whose first language is not English.
 
Nah, i don't agree.
I've always been poor.
None of my musician or artistic friends make a lot of money, yet few struggle to find or maintain loving relationships.

Without wishing to sound arrogant, if you're an interesting person, it doesnt matter what you do.

I think it's just a conversation-starter; "so...what do you do?"
When you don't know someone at all, but want to talk to them, it's smalltalk. I wouldn't get too hung up on some people being materialistic or motivated by money.
 
spacejunk said:
Good luck, forestman4.
Don't let negative posts discourage you - if your relationship inspires you to clean up, why not?
There are no black and white rules about addiction and cleaning up.
If you want to make a positive change in your life for the sake of your partner, i say good on you :)
Anything that motivates you can't be a bad thing.
Click to expand...

I think it's fine if it inspires someone but you gotta want it for yourself first and foremost. If you try to quit everything just to win someone over but deep down still want to use or haven't really gotten over your addiction then imo you are indeed setting yourself up to fail.

socko said:
Are they 2 sides of the same coin? I got into heroin at a young age. H is like a warm hug. It was a surrogate for the love i never got fron my parents. I fell in love snd quit heroin. Then i fell out of love and took it back up. This is how it had been for yea4s. Back and forth. Years off and yars on it.
Click to expand...

Love is the ultimate drug... How it affects your thinking, the craving, withdrawals, the lengths that people will go to try to find it. Sounds like a drug to me. :\
 
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socko said:
i get criticism whenever i say this, but that applies most strongly to Americanized Women. It is so obvious - at a party an American Woman asks me what i do. I say im a scientist trying to find the cure for Parkinsons Disease. She knows scientists dont earn much money so she runs. At the end of the party she goes home with the investment banker who bored me to tears an hour ago. Happens every time. But i talk to an asian or south american and ahe goes home with me. They are among the most materialistic women in the world. Same for a lot of Western European women. I try yo avoid them and date women whose first language is not English.
Click to expand...

I'm sure you wont care, but as an American woman, I find guys who exclusively seek out Asian women from non English speaking countries to be total creeps. Don't get me wrong I kinda understand your logic, id even say it makes sense, still makes me think of pervy old guys who like to control women like my father. But hey, just my opinion.

Ever see Louis Theroux Thai brides? That's what your description makes me think of.

Maybe you get criticism because it sounds like you're saying ALL American/Western women are like that, which most definitely is not true. It also sounds similar to the kind of shit some misogynists say about how they're being fucked over by women not doing what they want. Even if that's not what you mean, it kinda comes across a little like that to me.

I'd also argue that western people, men and women, are both massively materialistic...

I just want to dedicated myself to hopefully wining her love and becoming rich. (More richer than I already am)
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^^ for example.
You're just only bothered by women doing it because you're straight.

I'm in a similar position you are OP... trying to give up drugs for the man that I love, I say ignore all those people who say it won't work if you're not doing it for yourself. By all means try and find reasons to do it for yourself too, but ultimately if you can't find them. You gotta try right? That's what love is, even if getting clean for the ones we love is doomed to failure, ya gotta at least try.

Though like socko I hate materialism and have little desire to be rich and find excesses of wealth disgusting.
 
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JessFR said:
I say ignore all those people who say it won't work if you're not doing it for yourself. By all means try and find reasons to do it for yourself too, but ultimately if you can't find them. You gotta try right? That's what love is, even if getting clean for the ones we love is doomed to failure, ya gotta at least try
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This.
If love isn't enough reason, i wonder what is?
The key (to me) is wanting to cease or reduce your drug use.
If you can get to the point that you want to get better, does it matter what led you to that point?

I think the argument about "you're doomed to fail if you are trying to quit for someone else" relates more to quitting against your will - which obviously is not going to work for most people.
But if you want to quit for someone you love, i dont see the contradiction.

...speaking from experience. :)
 
spacejunk said:
This.
If love isn't enough reason, i wonder what is?
The key (to me) is wanting to cease or reduce your drug use.
If you can get to the point that you want to get better, does it matter what led you to that point?

I think the argument about "you're doomed to fail if you are trying to quit for someone else" relates more to quitting against your will - which obviously is not going to work for most people.
But if you want to quit for someone you love, i dont see the contradiction.

...speaking from experience. :)
Click to expand...

For once we agree on something, it's nice when it happens. :)
 
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