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How long should i say ive been sober for?

Sksjdjeisnfkeishz

Sksjdjeisnfkeishz

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 9, 2021
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Im proud to be sober. Although i dont know how long to consider my length of sobriety because ive slipped up and some of the times i slipped up i dont know when it was. And the times i slipped up it was just vaping or snorting pills that didnt get me high. So here goes.

Been clean from weed from some time in early 2020. I suspect it was after februrary but not too far after because i got on house arrest some point down the line. Ive been on other drugs too such as heroin, dxm, alcohol, hydrocdone, alcohol, etc. But that was before the last time i smoked weed.

Got put in a mental health facility july 2020 and at some point starting in august i started snorting other peoples meds. I was there long term because it was a residential placement. I got peer pressured into snorting the pills that couldnt even get me high. I snorted latuda, lithium, melatonin, and other shit i dont know of. Stupid as fuck i know the whole time i kept trying to get real pills like xanax and aderall.

I know since october 23 2020 ive been clean from pills that "get u high". I know i was clean sometime before that too i just dont rememher when. And ive been clean from everything other than vaping and that happened a few times in early 2021.

My question is how long should i say ive been clean. Should i count the pills thst didnt get me high? Should i count the vaping? I tell myself ive been clean for two years.
 
Sksjdjeisnfkeishz said:
Got put in a mental health facility july 2020 and at some point starting in august i started snorting other peoples meds. I was there long term because it was a residential placement. I got peer pressured into snorting the pills that couldnt even get me high. I snorted latuda, lithium, melatonin, and other shit i dont know of. Stupid as fuck i know the whole time i kept trying to get real pills like xanax and aderall.
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😂🤣😅

Sorry, I know it's a serious thread but couldn't help loling at that part. Don't worry.. I've been like a guinea pig for the pharmaceutical industry. Never been in a mental health facility nor psychotic, but I saw a psychiatrist for over 20 years (anxiety/depression) and was willing to try anything.

When it comes to "being clean" - tricky question. I sort of focus on my #1 poison, alcohol. That's what completely ruined me and no other substance has really come close (including meth, oxycodone and benzos).

I fell off the wagon bigtime last year (when the doctors cut me off benzos cold turkey) and ended up back in ICU within a month, and in/out of hospital for months.

Started seriously fighting it in 2010 after finding out I had diabetes needing insulin, thanks to alcohol-induced Pancreatitis in 2008. I had 6 beers last week, over 2 nights. It hasn't had me in its clutches since October 2021 though, so 5 months clean of that b*stard.
 
Sksjdjeisnfkeishz said:
Im proud to be sober. Although i dont know how long to consider my length of sobriety because ive slipped up and some of the times i slipped up i dont know when it was. And the times i slipped up it was just vaping or snorting pills that didnt get me high. So here goes.

Been clean from weed from some time in early 2020. I suspect it was after februrary but not too far after because i got on house arrest some point down the line. Ive been on other drugs too such as heroin, dxm, alcohol, hydrocdone, alcohol, etc. But that was before the last time i smoked weed.

Got put in a mental health facility july 2020 and at some point starting in august i started snorting other peoples meds. I was there long term because it was a residential placement. I got peer pressured into snorting the pills that couldnt even get me high. I snorted latuda, lithium, melatonin, and other shit i dont know of. Stupid as fuck i know the whole time i kept trying to get real pills like xanax and aderall.

I know since october 23 2020 ive been clean from pills that "get u high". I know i was clean sometime before that too i just dont rememher when. And ive been clean from everything other than vaping and that happened a few times in early 2021.

My question is how long should i say ive been clean. Should i count the pills thst didnt get me high? Should i count the vaping? I tell myself ive been clean for two years.
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Does it even matter? It's just a frigging date and nobody can answer thst q cause it's up to you. As long as you maintain yourself clean, it doesn't really matter lol.
 
i wouldn’t pick a date you have even the slightest qualm over. if you say you’ve been sober since x date, but know you snorted a pill after that date, even a stupid pill, it won’t feel right as it could.

what’s this date for? if aa, work it out with your sponsor. conversation with non-addicts? fuck them. yourself? sobriety isn’t necessarily black and white.
 
hydroazuanacaine said:
i wouldn’t pick a date you have even the slightest qualm over. if you say you’ve been sober since x date, but know you snorted a pill after that date, even a stupid pill, it won’t feel right as it could.

what’s this date for? if aa, work it out with your sponsor. conversation with non-addicts? fuck them. yourself? sobriety isn’t necessarily black and white.
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Thank you
 
I completely agree and was going to say something similar. Just pick a date that you feel is most correct and go with that.

Honestly I don't even count days of sobriety. For me, it puts too much pressure on myself. I'm just happy saying "I'm clean and sober".
If someone wants to know I can think about it for a minute and work it out. But otherwise I'm just sober :)
 
n3ophy7e said:
I completely agree and was going to say something similar. Just pick a date that you feel is most correct and go with that.

Honestly I don't even count days of sobriety. For me, it puts too much pressure on myself. I'm just happy saying "I'm clean and sober".
If someone wants to know I can think about it for a minute and work it out. But otherwise I'm just sober :)
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When u pass certain time, u just stop counting the days. U even get bored or don't mind at all as long as ur clean. I concur with you ✨✨✨✌💎
 
I don't count how long I've been sober. Certainly not at the moment as I relapsed in December. When I counted time I counted milestones for my friends to celebrate. But I always feared them as I hated the sense of shame I got when I had to reset the counter.

I say I've been in recovery since I walked into outpatient rehab in August 2017. Since then I have been in continuous Multiple times weekly intensive outpatient, forntnightly outpatient, or fortnightly counselling services to continue my progress regardless of my current state of use.

I have achieved periods of decent sobriety for me (9 months off everything at all) and varying amounts of sobriety off different substances (3 years heroin at one stage, 2 years other opiates, 18 months meth). Because I've rarely been able to stay off everything consecutively for a reasonable period of time, I just prefer to view it as an improved situation and a journey towards my eventual goal of a drug free life in the future.
 
n3ophy7e said:
Honestly I don't even count days of sobriety. For me, it puts too much pressure on myself. I'm just happy saying "I'm clean and sober".
If someone wants to know I can think about it for a minute and work it out. But otherwise I'm just sober :)
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exactly

not to diss AA or anything, but those chips are just stupid pieces of plastic that don't really mean much unless you want them to

might as well collect bottle caps

only the present matters, the past doesn't define you or your sobriety
 
Negentropic said:
exactly

not to diss AA or anything, but those chips are just stupid pieces of plastic that don't really mean much unless you want them to

might as well collect bottle caps

only the present matters, the past doesn't define you or your sobriety
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Or if you're like me when you're a teenager and you relapse after a year of being NAs golden child for being so young in recovery and you get hardcore shamed for having some leftover character defect you missed (you were actually living with an abusive parent still) so you keep going to meetings but continually relapsing so you collect a nice little hoard of 'welcome, just for today' Day 1 keychains hahaha.

I tell friends that story and show them the box and they go 'i didn't think you were meant to collect so many of these ones'
 
Counters and the notion of cleanliness as tools for recovery is a recipe for shame and shame does not help anyone to recover. Those who use drugs are not inherently dirty. The implication of resetting clocks has connotations of resetting progress. Returning to the beginning. It's flawed. This messaging pushes people in active addiction out of the support groups that they need because they believe that they need to be "clean" to be there, when the only qualifications required to enter a support group should be to be in need of support. The idea that someone should be sober in order to attend a support group for people trying to get sober is completely backwards.

My view of recovery has evolved throughout my journey. I've tried the "only weed" diet, the "weed with exceptions" diet (i.e. no this or that but I can do the other) and the nothing diet and I'm sure if I worked it out I could tell you how much time roughly passed between the last time and the next time taking any particular substance on the rolodex of a poly drug abuser but it's ultimately meaningless.

My latest conclusion is that recovery is holistic. It really doesn't matter, beyond cell regeneration and any other of the physical aspects of recovery that I don't know enough about to comment on, how long you haven't done something for. What matters is how well you feel, behave, think, function, eat, sleep, etc.

Don't focus on the minutes, hours or days that have passed since you last did something you regret. Focus on how you are feeling right now about what you're doing right now and how you might be able to help yourself do a little better tomorrow. A look at the past to learn your lessons and a look into the future to make your plans is enough but the only place you should linger is the present.
 
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