bunnymunro
Bluelighter
Hi,
I would like your opinions on how to proceed with the winning over of the object of my current affection.
Several weeks ago, I met a lady at a friend's 50th birthday. It was three day affair, with all the bells and whistles. I was already thinking that she was very hot, and was pretty stoked when a mate sidled up to me at the bar, and told me that this woman had asked him about me and if he would introduce her to me. This was after he had already done so, and we had been hanging out a bit, (the three of us). This relates to the title of the thread and my inability to read cues, I didn't really pick up that she was single and interested. I also didn't know a lot of the people there, more men than the women, and its not the sort of place where you want to be accused of making unwanted moves on someone else's ol'lady.
OK,as the night moved on to the next day, and the crowd started to thin, the relative amount of women did as well, we continued to get on well, played pool, etc, but due to the numbers of people, and the groups were getting smaller and friendlier as the numbers dwindled. I found it difficult to try and cut her out of the pack, and find some one on one time with her.
OK, now I am 48, she is umm, dunno, 35? Hot as, and loves to party. She has children with shared care, but when she doesnt have her kids, and wants to party, she goes all out. like, we used to, back in the day... lol (some of us still do). Now, this is where alarm bells go off, as from past experience, this sort of woman is as rare as they come in my neck of the woods and age/stage of life. She is sexy, funny, smart and likes to party as much as I do. Not whats usually available in the approaching middle age dating group (bitter divorcees, who rage out to the eagles and have recently discovered some of the finer points of drinking sherry 8)
OK, back to the party, as the sun was coming up, and it was a small crew out at this point left, she had no intention of leaving, it was that sort of time of day, when everyone is coming down, reflective and wondering what the rest of the day will bring forth, and, as is often he case with many party girls, wondering where the next lot of drugs is coming from. Now, I will probably come under fire for saying that, but in my experience, there is usually some women who will party as long a you keep them topped up. and, lets face it, sausage fests are no fun, and women are fun to have around, whether they put out or not, so no one really minds shouting them a line here, a pill there, keeps the party rollin.
Well maybe this woman I am chasing is not shy to let it be known that she ain't going anywhere, at least not while there the likelihood that the party would rekindle again soon. Now, I can fully relate to this attitude, I will nearly always choose drugs over leaving the party with a someone and taking them home (probably goes somewhere toward explaining my singleness 
)
However, I was fucked, almost straight, it was 11 oclock in the morning, I was out of drugs, but I knew where to get some, but I had to work at six that evening, and I knew that when it cranked up again, and if I was still there, then I wouldn't get away until sunday night sometime...So I took my leave and went home to pretend to lie down and rest for at least a short while as I was driving that night.
OK fast forward to last weekend, I had made some enquiries about this lady, yea, she was single, no one that I spoke to had anything bad to say about her, except, yea, she could be fun, but "trouble". (I don't think the trouble was meant in a bad way, more a "free spirited" type of trouble, as in "probably will give you frustration and grief")
Well trouble and I, we go way back.... if I don't seek trouble, it seems to seek me, either way, we always seem to hook up, and somehow or other, and part ways as the dust settles..Maybe I am addicted to excitement or something, or maybe I think I am peter pan, but to be honest, the run of the mill 40 something woman who is settled, and conventional really does not spin my wheels at all... I am usually attracted to women who are a bit more out there, fun, and smart. It also seems to me that these ones of my age group, are either single for a very good reason, or very broken, as in great fun when they are on a roll, but when the shit goes down, it goes down in a maelstrom of non-reasonable unpredictable illogical and sometimes violent shitstorm of emotions and pain.
So, last Saturday morning, I finished night shift and went to my favourite club, about 6 am. At about 8 am, three women roll in, this one I am hot for amongst them, they had been out clubbing etc, and ours was the only place open. So I played pool with her, and was getting good vibes/body language etc from her, and made it pretty clear to her that I was keen. I also mentioned to one of my mates that I was, and he has known her for years. Unbeknownst to me, (till he told me last night) he "put in a good word for me, and in the conversation, he said to her, "well would you fuck him? " she said yes, so he said "go on then, grab him and fuck off" and she said, "nah I am in party mode"
Anyways I and some others had arranged to go out to a farm shooing and we left to do that (I thought that the women were coming out as well, and had to think twice about going when I found they weren't). However, when we got back she and her friends were still at the bar. OK, so we hung out a bit, I asked her for her number, and I got a call asking if I could work that night, and so I had to fuck off home and prepare for that.
Whe I got home, I txtd her and said that I was glad I ran into her and had been hoping to since I ran into at that party a few weeks ago, and if she gets bored later, to give me a call.
No reply, but that's cool, she was on a roll, and probably wasn't in the mood for thinking of an appropriate response, and I was thinking, "play it cool dude, don't appear too keen" So I did, till about 2 am, and had a wtf moment and called her, with no answer. However, some time later, she called me back, and got my answer phone but it sounded like she was standing next to the speaker and I couldn't understand a word, so I txtd her back 'couldn't understand a word you said, but if you need a ride, give me yell"
Sure enough, about 5.30 am, she called and I offered to pick her up from a nightclub, so I picked up her and two mates, who were both 20-something women who she was with earlier. After a couple of stops, we went back to her place, and the they wanted to party on, and the girls invited two of their friends back who they had met, and we made a bit of a feed , and sat around, watching some music vids, having a drink, and shooting shit. There wasn't really tension, but I sort of felt that they were expecting, or hoping that someone would pull out a bag if drugs or some pills, to carry on. I had some amphetamines, but really only a small amount and would like o have shared it with her, but didn't heve enough to make it go six ways, and once, again, I didn't have an opportunity to catch her alone.
One of her friends needed to go home, and asked me if I minded dropping her home, as I was sober, and I said yes, and then the other two blokes said, well, can you drop me off as well please, yea righto whatever.
Now as I was getting ready to go, she was going through her phone, and checking out unanswered calls, and then invited someone she had met out last night to come round, to carry on party, and as we left, I sort of said, well shall I see you in a bit, when I have dropped your mates of, and she replied, oh, dunno, I may go toes up for a bit, get some zzz in before the afternoon. However she had some friends coming over?
So I dropped back, but there was another car there, and voices from inside, and a locked door, so I didnt knock but left, feeling somewhat conflicted. When I left I was wearing some sort of blonde wig for some reason, and on my way home, there was an event unfolding, which I stopped at for a bit of a look. I took a selfie of myself with this stupid wig on with a witty comment, and sent it to her.
This was sunday morning. Later in the day, I caught up with a mate, who gave me some pills that he had promised me the previous day, this was about 6 in the evening, so I txted her, "wanna parteeee?" she knew I was getting them . But she said, "couldn't possibly, I have to crash, as she had been pubbing in the afternoon, "but I loved the pic you sent me"
ok I made a half arsed attempt to coerce her, but didn't push it too hard.
Tuesday, as I was knocking off work, I texted her, (6 am) good morning would you like some breakfast? got a reply about 11, apoligising for the late reply, asking what was for breakfast, to which I alluded that it was in a glass but wasn't orange juice.
she told me I was a bad influence!, and she is living her other life this week, kids and work and no party. OK I am cool with that, in fact I respect that, would think that she would be irresponsible if she didn't.
So yesterday I txted her and asked how old they were, and so we had a couple of pleasant exchanges regarding kids thats it story finished
now question time...
I think that she does like me but I don't know in what way, as a party guy, or something more. I don't like to pester her and appear needy or desperate, but I really like her t this point, and not just as a party girl, but as a person.
Basically I want your opinion of whether I should actively pursue this woman, as in ask her out on a date, or something, or arrange to meet her out again another weekend.
I would like to get to know her in her "other life" as we all know that drug fuelled weekends are not a solid basis for a solid relationship. How can I go about this?
Damn long thread, I may need to edit.Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far
I would like your opinions on how to proceed with the winning over of the object of my current affection.
Several weeks ago, I met a lady at a friend's 50th birthday. It was three day affair, with all the bells and whistles. I was already thinking that she was very hot, and was pretty stoked when a mate sidled up to me at the bar, and told me that this woman had asked him about me and if he would introduce her to me. This was after he had already done so, and we had been hanging out a bit, (the three of us). This relates to the title of the thread and my inability to read cues, I didn't really pick up that she was single and interested. I also didn't know a lot of the people there, more men than the women, and its not the sort of place where you want to be accused of making unwanted moves on someone else's ol'lady.
OK,as the night moved on to the next day, and the crowd started to thin, the relative amount of women did as well, we continued to get on well, played pool, etc, but due to the numbers of people, and the groups were getting smaller and friendlier as the numbers dwindled. I found it difficult to try and cut her out of the pack, and find some one on one time with her.
OK, now I am 48, she is umm, dunno, 35? Hot as, and loves to party. She has children with shared care, but when she doesnt have her kids, and wants to party, she goes all out. like, we used to, back in the day... lol (some of us still do). Now, this is where alarm bells go off, as from past experience, this sort of woman is as rare as they come in my neck of the woods and age/stage of life. She is sexy, funny, smart and likes to party as much as I do. Not whats usually available in the approaching middle age dating group (bitter divorcees, who rage out to the eagles and have recently discovered some of the finer points of drinking sherry 8)
OK, back to the party, as the sun was coming up, and it was a small crew out at this point left, she had no intention of leaving, it was that sort of time of day, when everyone is coming down, reflective and wondering what the rest of the day will bring forth, and, as is often he case with many party girls, wondering where the next lot of drugs is coming from. Now, I will probably come under fire for saying that, but in my experience, there is usually some women who will party as long a you keep them topped up. and, lets face it, sausage fests are no fun, and women are fun to have around, whether they put out or not, so no one really minds shouting them a line here, a pill there, keeps the party rollin.
Well maybe this woman I am chasing is not shy to let it be known that she ain't going anywhere, at least not while there the likelihood that the party would rekindle again soon. Now, I can fully relate to this attitude, I will nearly always choose drugs over leaving the party with a someone and taking them home (probably goes somewhere toward explaining my singleness ) However, I was fucked, almost straight, it was 11 oclock in the morning, I was out of drugs, but I knew where to get some, but I had to work at six that evening, and I knew that when it cranked up again, and if I was still there, then I wouldn't get away until sunday night sometime...So I took my leave and went home to pretend to lie down and rest for at least a short while as I was driving that night.
OK fast forward to last weekend, I had made some enquiries about this lady, yea, she was single, no one that I spoke to had anything bad to say about her, except, yea, she could be fun, but "trouble". (I don't think the trouble was meant in a bad way, more a "free spirited" type of trouble, as in "probably will give you frustration and grief")
Well trouble and I, we go way back.... if I don't seek trouble, it seems to seek me, either way, we always seem to hook up, and somehow or other, and part ways as the dust settles..Maybe I am addicted to excitement or something, or maybe I think I am peter pan, but to be honest, the run of the mill 40 something woman who is settled, and conventional really does not spin my wheels at all... I am usually attracted to women who are a bit more out there, fun, and smart. It also seems to me that these ones of my age group, are either single for a very good reason, or very broken, as in great fun when they are on a roll, but when the shit goes down, it goes down in a maelstrom of non-reasonable unpredictable illogical and sometimes violent shitstorm of emotions and pain.
So, last Saturday morning, I finished night shift and went to my favourite club, about 6 am. At about 8 am, three women roll in, this one I am hot for amongst them, they had been out clubbing etc, and ours was the only place open. So I played pool with her, and was getting good vibes/body language etc from her, and made it pretty clear to her that I was keen. I also mentioned to one of my mates that I was, and he has known her for years. Unbeknownst to me, (till he told me last night) he "put in a good word for me, and in the conversation, he said to her, "well would you fuck him? " she said yes, so he said "go on then, grab him and fuck off" and she said, "nah I am in party mode"
Anyways I and some others had arranged to go out to a farm shooing and we left to do that (I thought that the women were coming out as well, and had to think twice about going when I found they weren't). However, when we got back she and her friends were still at the bar. OK, so we hung out a bit, I asked her for her number, and I got a call asking if I could work that night, and so I had to fuck off home and prepare for that.
Whe I got home, I txtd her and said that I was glad I ran into her and had been hoping to since I ran into at that party a few weeks ago, and if she gets bored later, to give me a call.
No reply, but that's cool, she was on a roll, and probably wasn't in the mood for thinking of an appropriate response, and I was thinking, "play it cool dude, don't appear too keen" So I did, till about 2 am, and had a wtf moment and called her, with no answer. However, some time later, she called me back, and got my answer phone but it sounded like she was standing next to the speaker and I couldn't understand a word, so I txtd her back 'couldn't understand a word you said, but if you need a ride, give me yell"
Sure enough, about 5.30 am, she called and I offered to pick her up from a nightclub, so I picked up her and two mates, who were both 20-something women who she was with earlier. After a couple of stops, we went back to her place, and the they wanted to party on, and the girls invited two of their friends back who they had met, and we made a bit of a feed , and sat around, watching some music vids, having a drink, and shooting shit. There wasn't really tension, but I sort of felt that they were expecting, or hoping that someone would pull out a bag if drugs or some pills, to carry on. I had some amphetamines, but really only a small amount and would like o have shared it with her, but didn't heve enough to make it go six ways, and once, again, I didn't have an opportunity to catch her alone.
One of her friends needed to go home, and asked me if I minded dropping her home, as I was sober, and I said yes, and then the other two blokes said, well, can you drop me off as well please, yea righto whatever.
Now as I was getting ready to go, she was going through her phone, and checking out unanswered calls, and then invited someone she had met out last night to come round, to carry on party, and as we left, I sort of said, well shall I see you in a bit, when I have dropped your mates of, and she replied, oh, dunno, I may go toes up for a bit, get some zzz in before the afternoon. However she had some friends coming over?
So I dropped back, but there was another car there, and voices from inside, and a locked door, so I didnt knock but left, feeling somewhat conflicted. When I left I was wearing some sort of blonde wig for some reason, and on my way home, there was an event unfolding, which I stopped at for a bit of a look. I took a selfie of myself with this stupid wig on with a witty comment, and sent it to her.
This was sunday morning. Later in the day, I caught up with a mate, who gave me some pills that he had promised me the previous day, this was about 6 in the evening, so I txted her, "wanna parteeee?" she knew I was getting them . But she said, "couldn't possibly, I have to crash, as she had been pubbing in the afternoon, "but I loved the pic you sent me"
ok I made a half arsed attempt to coerce her, but didn't push it too hard.
Tuesday, as I was knocking off work, I texted her, (6 am) good morning would you like some breakfast? got a reply about 11, apoligising for the late reply, asking what was for breakfast, to which I alluded that it was in a glass but wasn't orange juice.
she told me I was a bad influence!, and she is living her other life this week, kids and work and no party. OK I am cool with that, in fact I respect that, would think that she would be irresponsible if she didn't.
So yesterday I txted her and asked how old they were, and so we had a couple of pleasant exchanges regarding kids thats it story finished
now question time...
I think that she does like me but I don't know in what way, as a party guy, or something more. I don't like to pester her and appear needy or desperate, but I really like her t this point, and not just as a party girl, but as a person.
Basically I want your opinion of whether I should actively pursue this woman, as in ask her out on a date, or something, or arrange to meet her out again another weekend.
I would like to get to know her in her "other life" as we all know that drug fuelled weekends are not a solid basis for a solid relationship. How can I go about this?
Damn long thread, I may need to edit.Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far
