I am addicted with no denying. I smoke meth pretty much all day/night every day. I also eat/sleep/work/pay my bills/function/maintain/work a full time job,etc... The only real problem I have is that my short term memory is almost gone sometimes... I live someplace where its everywhere, and is cheap, and good, so no financial problems, never an issue getting more. The only area where Im really having issues is very bad short term memory often. I am really thinking hard about tapering, i just don't know how to unlock my habit from being a huge part of my life and daily routine. Any thoughts or ideas would be appreciated...
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Help with meth addiction
- Thread starter 2spun4one
- Start date
NeverHaddaChance
Bluelighter
You definitely came to the right place... I've found myself in your situation too (except I'd snort over smoke to control the duration). At first, I was a supermom. I finally had the energy and mood lift needed to grind through mundane parts of life as a mother, create an environment of stimulating activities from my daughter, and get through an excessive course load to work toward my degree. One of the first things I noticed was trouble with memory and more negative physical side effects as the use went on... The wonderful community here has been nothing but helpful and chalk full of great advice.
Like you I tried to taper. No one knew about my habit... My husband, family, and friends were oblivious for nearly 2 years because I didn't go overboard, tried to limit my use, and took care of myself. Eventually the small problems both added up, and got bigger. My health was failing, and tapering only actually made the process of stopping worse. Your situation will vary, because you are you (and I'm me? lol) but I've been clean since June with one lapse in September to remind myself why I stopped.
Here's what I've found useful:
- cancel your life for at least a week, I know this feels impossible but you will need time and rest
- VITAMINS! A good multi vitamin, a B Complex, and chelated magnesium were my saviors
- unless your health depends on it, DO NOT GET METH ABUSE ON YOUR MED RECORD! After being horrifically abused in the hands of medical professionals with chips on their shoulders... Trust me, it's not worth it.
- only tell your "hide the body" friends, the ones your trust not to judge or talk about you to others, the ones that won't treat you like some "junkie"
- Hydration and nutrition (at least for me) were even more difficult after stopping, bland soft foods are your friend
- BENZOS! Seriously, it's substancially better to be calm and relaxed while in total dysphoria. Opiods help too, but avoid starting a replacement habit by keeping the use short term.
- don't fight the urges to use! Fighting the desire strengthens it, where I found that accepting that you want to revert to old coping mechanisms and reminding yourself it will pass helped a bunch.
- (IMO) avoid meetings... meetings are full of court ordered people who don't take sobriety seriously. If you are easily influenced I would avoid and stick to online communities moderated with your recovery in mind.
- Antidepressants made it easier to function early on, and have made coping with the fallout less miserable.
I've been on vyvance (40 mg) for awhile to help treat my ADD, but unfortunately it costs too much and the midwest solution to substance using ADDers is not to do anything else... Sorry if this is scattered, I've been on the rebound from that for the last couple days. It's important to know that the negatives only continue to grow the longer you go... I hope this has helped, and welcome to the dark side.
Like you I tried to taper. No one knew about my habit... My husband, family, and friends were oblivious for nearly 2 years because I didn't go overboard, tried to limit my use, and took care of myself. Eventually the small problems both added up, and got bigger. My health was failing, and tapering only actually made the process of stopping worse. Your situation will vary, because you are you (and I'm me? lol) but I've been clean since June with one lapse in September to remind myself why I stopped.
Here's what I've found useful:
- cancel your life for at least a week, I know this feels impossible but you will need time and rest
- VITAMINS! A good multi vitamin, a B Complex, and chelated magnesium were my saviors
- unless your health depends on it, DO NOT GET METH ABUSE ON YOUR MED RECORD! After being horrifically abused in the hands of medical professionals with chips on their shoulders... Trust me, it's not worth it.
- only tell your "hide the body" friends, the ones your trust not to judge or talk about you to others, the ones that won't treat you like some "junkie"
- Hydration and nutrition (at least for me) were even more difficult after stopping, bland soft foods are your friend
- BENZOS! Seriously, it's substancially better to be calm and relaxed while in total dysphoria. Opiods help too, but avoid starting a replacement habit by keeping the use short term.
- don't fight the urges to use! Fighting the desire strengthens it, where I found that accepting that you want to revert to old coping mechanisms and reminding yourself it will pass helped a bunch.
- (IMO) avoid meetings... meetings are full of court ordered people who don't take sobriety seriously. If you are easily influenced I would avoid and stick to online communities moderated with your recovery in mind.
- Antidepressants made it easier to function early on, and have made coping with the fallout less miserable.
I've been on vyvance (40 mg) for awhile to help treat my ADD, but unfortunately it costs too much and the midwest solution to substance using ADDers is not to do anything else... Sorry if this is scattered, I've been on the rebound from that for the last couple days. It's important to know that the negatives only continue to grow the longer you go... I hope this has helped, and welcome to the dark side.
Jabberwocky
Frumious Bandersnatch
I'm in a similar situation - I'm managing my life even though doing IV meth several days a week but my memory is fucked and increasingly making doing my work difficult. Working basically alone from home makes it easy not to notice how many days of work I'm not getting finished because I've been off with the meth pixies or just can't rustle up enough brain cells to get something done and am too high to get stressed about it. It's definitely time for me to stop (after the 2.5 g that just arrived is done with - which at my rate of consumption will be less than a week).
My strategy includes everything that @NeverHaddaChance mentions but instead of anti-depressants I'm going to do two days on valium plus take double doses of the anti-psychotic Abilify [since meth usage both produces and is caused by my bi-polar] and then start taking my dexamphetamine ADHD meds at double dose then taper back to normal dose. The d-amp seems to block cravings in my past experience and oral 10 mg of d-amp is a damn sight less harmful than slamming 3 points of crystal every morning. A double dose of anti-psychotics and I'll probably stop feeling the rush / high which reduces the incentive to keep going.
I'm also doing some dog walking to get some responsibility and focus / commitment outside of myself to concentrate on. Caring about others (even a dog) is helpful in pushing through how shit one feels during this process. Plus the exercise helps.
My strategy includes everything that @NeverHaddaChance mentions but instead of anti-depressants I'm going to do two days on valium plus take double doses of the anti-psychotic Abilify [since meth usage both produces and is caused by my bi-polar] and then start taking my dexamphetamine ADHD meds at double dose then taper back to normal dose. The d-amp seems to block cravings in my past experience and oral 10 mg of d-amp is a damn sight less harmful than slamming 3 points of crystal every morning. A double dose of anti-psychotics and I'll probably stop feeling the rush / high which reduces the incentive to keep going.
I'm also doing some dog walking to get some responsibility and focus / commitment outside of myself to concentrate on. Caring about others (even a dog) is helpful in pushing through how shit one feels during this process. Plus the exercise helps.
NeverHaddaChance
Bluelighter
^^Excellent advice. Pets can't talk back and they are a great distraction. If a pet seems like too much, you could try to keep a plant alive. I had multiple pots growing so that if I killed one it wasn't the end of everything
Meth novice 79
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2019
- Messages
- 854
It’s a sneaky little drug like that.
Convinces you that your sharper, smarter, more energetic and more capable.
Then before you know it you don’t know what you did for the last week, your kids names, or do you even have kids?
You’re also broke because you kept having sickies and spent your pay on some crap that was no good.
Definitely attempt to get some control over this, even if it’s just so you can say that you can control it if need be.
Eventually you will need to.
Convinces you that your sharper, smarter, more energetic and more capable.
Then before you know it you don’t know what you did for the last week, your kids names, or do you even have kids?
You’re also broke because you kept having sickies and spent your pay on some crap that was no good.
Definitely attempt to get some control over this, even if it’s just so you can say that you can control it if need be.
Eventually you will need to.
Jabberwocky
Frumious Bandersnatch
Ok - my last shot )which totally over-amped me) was 3 days ago and I have benzoed / slept my way through the worst of the comedown with 40 tabs of valium left if things get worse. Managed to get up at 6;30 AM and take the dog for a good (but very slow walk). Noticed my mood quite volatile and I am avoiding people as much as possible until my normal good humour and easygoing character returns.
Hey @2spun4one if you want to talk to someone going through quitting at the same time, feel free to reach out.
Hey @2spun4one if you want to talk to someone going through quitting at the same time, feel free to reach out.