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Handshakes

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Shaking hands is a pretty common greeting in many cultures of the world, but it seems like specific areas and small groups have their own unique hand shaking style.

So how do you react when someone offers to shake your hand? Are you a firm hand-shaker? Weak? Do you feel out the situation based on the person?

And do you have any different or unique secret handshakes withing groups of friends or subcultures?

The shake and fist bump is popular in my neck of the woods.
 
If someone sticks out their hand to be shook or fist-bumped, I will return the gesture. I am not normally the first one to act on this as I am still somewhat of a germaphobe, esp. with strangers. 8(

I would say I'm a middle-of-the-road hand-shaker as I don't let my hand go totally limp but I don't (have the strength to :P) crush anybody's fingers.

Nope, no unique or secret handshakes within groups of friends or subcultures.
 
What I don't like is when it becomes a routine. Like every single time I see this person I "have" to shake their hand. It is why I try to keep my head down at work and act like a super supervisor that people don't ask out to go eat.
 
everyone always says "A strong grip..." lol

after making 2 chainmail armour shirts, i think anyone would have a strong grip lol
 
tumblr_lho0deGvTD1qgu6fio1_500.gif


with everyone.
 
Just a plain firm handshake from me but usually only on meeting someone for the first time or if it's someone I haven't seen for quite a while.
 
Limp handshakes are disturbing and entirely non-committal.

Super firm handshakes are trying too hard.

A firm and steady handshake, of equal strength and measure to the recipient 'shaker', is what you aim for.

If you over-think it, it'll be all wrong.
 
'warm' handshakes give off an impression of being genuine or friendly.
limp seems to indicate awkwardness or discomfort. painfully tight handshakes have a sort of aggressive or macho vibe. or maybe another effect of social awkwardness?

it would be interesting to see a response a person from a country that doesn't traditionally shake hands.
there are so many non-verbal greetings - germaphobes should be glad that not all cultures do the 'kiss on each cheek' thing ;)
 
tambourine-man said:
Limp handshakes are disturbing and entirely non-committal.

Super firm handshakes are trying too hard.

A firm and steady handshake, of equal strength and measure to the recipient 'shaker', is what you aim for.

If you over-think it, it'll be all wrong.
Click to expand...

Couldn't agree more. I feel like the 'overly firm handshake' is just someone trying to prove something. The weak one is just gay.
 
Yeah, usually somewhere in between.


I remember one really awkward kiss on the cheek moment. Usually when a male and a female are hanging out down here, especially if they are young and/or hispanic, a kiss on the cheek is pretty much standard practice on a goodbye, even if you hardly know the person. This one German girl was hanging out with us (I have no idea how I ended up with a German girl at my house, but whatever, that's not the point) and as I said goodbye I just instinctively kissed her on the cheek.

Holy shit, that was awkward. She gave me the weirdest fucking look, and that prompted all of her friends to look at me, and meanwhile my girlfriend is sitting there like "what the fuck is going on?" because of all the staring at me. Turns out neither Germans nor the particular group of people who brought the German girl here were on to this Miami custom, and it was... well it was just fucking awkward. I guess some Miamians are on to it and some aren't, but I have never felt like such a creep in my life. It was a perfect Larry David moment.

And as for handshakes, always use the right hand (unless you really can't use the right one, like if you don't have one or you are carrying shit) and I fucking hate when I shake someones hand and it is too limp, or if you shake somebodies hand and they squeeze that motherfucker, and then have the balls to criticize you for not trying to project the image of super macho man all the time. As others have said, you want to aim for the perfect medium, or a simple fistbump.
 
My hand shake style will change depending on the person, situation and how I'm feeling. :)

Sometimes I give that half hand shake, which is only my fingers and light- (some would call this a weak hand shake)

Sometimes I give a firm, equal to, and confident handshake.

And sometimes I give a 'I don't give a shit about you' half handshake that really isn't either of the above but a quick grasp and release ;) haha
 
tambourine-man said:
Limp handshakes are disturbing and entirely non-committal.

Super firm handshakes are trying too hard.

A firm and steady handshake, of equal strength and measure to the recipient 'shaker', is what you aim for.

If you over-think it, it'll be all wrong.
Click to expand...
this. plus look them in the eye when you're doing it.

alasdair
 
^ Yep, eye contact is a must. But then I tend to think that about most situations where you're meeting/greeting.

Trouble is, even if you effortlessly hit the 'firm and measured' target every time, there's the very rare occasion when you shake hands with somebody who gives an extremely limp handshake. If you were expecting something reasonably firm in response, your handshake must seem comparatively aggressive and you come across looking like one of those knuckle-rotating idiots.

That said, 'limp shakers' are few and far between, so best not to over-think it.

I must admit, I have a friend who has a very limp handshake. I mean, really limp. Incredibly limp. Limp enough that you could easily mistake it as a prosthesis.

After seeing him for the fist time in ages, he stuck his hand out with a welcoming smile, I grabbed it and... it was like shaking the hand of the recently deceased. It freaked me out. I've never forgotten it.

I don't know him well enough to give him stick about it, but you don't want a handshake that's comparable to a dead person.
 
I am from the tambourine-man school of hand shakes. Limp finger grabs leave me with a shiver down my spine where as the knuckle crushing "seek and destroy" is just as anti social. The trick is you have to take control and ensure there is good contact before initiating the shake. Firm but friendly is my preferred option.

Growing up in the South Pacific with many cuzzie bros I also have the "soul brother shake" with a shoulder hug for my closest friends and family....
NSFW:
soul_bro_shake.png

small


Then to confuse matters more there is also the "hongi" especially when meeting some of my friends grandparents...
NSFW:
hongi-kissing.jpg


Hongi.jpg
 
tambourine-man said:
Limp handshakes are disturbing and entirely non-committal.

Super firm handshakes are trying too hard.

A firm and steady handshake, of equal strength and measure to the recipient 'shaker', is what you aim for.

If you over-think it, it'll be all wrong.
Click to expand...

All joking aside this is pretty much it.
 
i'm a hugger. i normally hug my friends and family hi and bye. if it's someone i don't know well, i just give a "hey" and nod.

i shake hands only in a formal/business setting, though as a woman, i'm rarely greeted with anything but flimsy handshakes from men.

perhaps, i'm misinterpreting it and it's the polite thing to do, but i find it slightly off-putting when i extend my hand for a confident handshake and the dude on the other end, lightly grabs my fingers and gives it a gentle shake. i guess they're expecting to give me something like this:

feminine_handshake.jpg


and since that's not the way i'm extending my hand, it's awkward. for pete's sake, i may be a petite woman but i can handle a firm fucking handshake! :X
 
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