ownstrength
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2022
- Messages
- 129
Hello Bluebuddies!
I am a very long-time lurker with an outright addiction to browsing Bluelight forums who finally joined.
I spent ~15 years in heavy addiction to a number of substances, mostly opiates (errthing but mostly oxy & smoked heroin), cannabis, stimulants (mostly meth but some amp and coke), and towards the end even benzos (who knows what RCs in the pressed xannies)
In 2018 I entered residential treatment and ceased all drugs except "medical" cannabis, which I continued to use and abuse badly. A little over a year ago I did another short stint in residential and intensive outpatient to stop the cannabis. Until a few months ago I had about a year clean off cannabis and 4+ years clean off Everything Else, including alcohol. But due to job related stress in a awesome career I've been building since I've been in recovery, I was overwhelmed with anxiety and reached for something. In an effort to reduce harm it turned out to be kratom.
I quickly transitioned to extracts and lately I've been spending a lot of money on the OPMS black shots, which I have found to be the most pleasing. It's getting out of hand and I am eager to re-establish my abstinence.
On a side note, throughout my recovery I maintained a guilty pleasure of browsing the Bluelight forums. It's been a way to keep in touch with the "drug" community without actually participating in it. I guess I finally decided to stop lurking and join, especially since I've started struggling with the kratom extracts.
I hope to share some experiences and community with you all. Thanks!
I am a very long-time lurker with an outright addiction to browsing Bluelight forums who finally joined.
I spent ~15 years in heavy addiction to a number of substances, mostly opiates (errthing but mostly oxy & smoked heroin), cannabis, stimulants (mostly meth but some amp and coke), and towards the end even benzos (who knows what RCs in the pressed xannies)
In 2018 I entered residential treatment and ceased all drugs except "medical" cannabis, which I continued to use and abuse badly. A little over a year ago I did another short stint in residential and intensive outpatient to stop the cannabis. Until a few months ago I had about a year clean off cannabis and 4+ years clean off Everything Else, including alcohol. But due to job related stress in a awesome career I've been building since I've been in recovery, I was overwhelmed with anxiety and reached for something. In an effort to reduce harm it turned out to be kratom.
I quickly transitioned to extracts and lately I've been spending a lot of money on the OPMS black shots, which I have found to be the most pleasing. It's getting out of hand and I am eager to re-establish my abstinence.
On a side note, throughout my recovery I maintained a guilty pleasure of browsing the Bluelight forums. It's been a way to keep in touch with the "drug" community without actually participating in it. I guess I finally decided to stop lurking and join, especially since I've started struggling with the kratom extracts.
I hope to share some experiences and community with you all. Thanks!
