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Future is terrifying when you can't do anything or BE

ChemicallyEnhanced

ChemicallyEnhanced

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 29, 2018
Messages
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Location
UK
For reasons that would take forever to detail, It's EXTREMELY unlikely I'll ever be able to work (unless it was something unlikely like becoming a successful author or *shudders in horror* "influencer") due to reasons both physical and mental.
I'm also in my 30s now and don't have a partner and have never been in a real, long-term relationship and I just feel like I'm probably never going to be (as much as I would love to be).

Because of this I sometimes get very anxious thinking about the future due to a combination of guilt over the fact that I'm always gonna be a burden to *someone* by having to reply on them, and fear for who will take care of/look after me.

Like, I currently live with my parents and I don't think living ALONE is ever going to be realistic for me (I always end up in hospital within a few months) so when my parents get older or aren't around anymore, who is gonna take care of me?
I mean, there's my brother and sister-in-law, but they have two young kids. Or my niece and nephew, but they're literal kids right now.
And I really don't WANT to be this burden they have to deal with.
 
ChemicallyEnhanced said:
For reasons that would take forever to detail, It's EXTREMELY unlikely I'll ever be able to work (unless it was something unlikely like becoming a successful author or *shudders in horror* "influencer") due to reasons both physical and mental.
I'm also in my 30s now and don't have a partner and have never been in a real, long-term relationship and I just feel like I'm probably never going to be (as much as I would love to be).

Because of this I sometimes get very anxious thinking about the future due to a combination of guilt over the fact that I'm always gonna be a burden to *someone* by having to reply on them, and fear for who will take care of/look after me.

Like, I currently live with my parents and I don't think living ALONE is ever going to be realistic for me (I always end up in hospital within a few months) so when my parents get older or aren't around anymore, who is gonna take care of me?
I mean, there's my brother and sister-in-law, but they have two young kids. Or my niece and nephew, but they're literal kids right now.
And I really don't WANT to be this burden they have to deal with.
Click to expand...
not long ago there have been moments in my life when i was exactly where you are now, so i can relate very well.
i won't go into details here about where i'm now with this issue, or how i mange not to slip back into a negative mental place.
but if you have questions, feel free to pm me.
 
F.U.B.A.R. said:
My first bit of advice would be to stay out of The Lounge.
Click to expand...
why? we are very welcoming there.
it's just not the right place when what you are looking for is a bit of empathy and serious advice.
because in the lounge, people like fun.

@ChemicallyEnhanced
sometimes it's not the right moment for fun. but having fun is one of the best ways to overcome bad feelings.
so maybe you could start by thinking about ways to have fun.
it doesn't always have to be linked to big circle of friends or a lot of money, or living in a big city. it doesn't even have to involve laughing out loud.
maybe watch a movie you like, or read a book.
do you like animals, or nature?
cooking?
anything works, really, as long as it's something you like doing and provides a distraction from overthinking about what is not as you think it should be and worse case scenarios.
once you get that moment of mental relaxation, you can start to increase the time you spend doing fun things.
and then you can start thinking about what comes next.
 
lecroute said:
why? we are very welcoming there.
it's just not the right place when what you are looking for is a bit of empathy and serious advice.
because in the lounge, people like fun.

@ChemicallyEnhanced
sometimes it's not the right moment for fun. but having fun is one of the best ways to overcome bad feelings.
so maybe you could start by thinking about ways to have fun.
it doesn't always have to be linked to big circle of friends or a lot of money, or living in a big city. it doesn't even have to involve laughing out loud.
maybe watch a movie you like, or read a book.
do you like animals, or nature?
cooking?
anything works, really, as long as it's something you like doing and provides a distraction from overthinking about what is not as you think it should be and worse case scenarios.
once you get that moment of mental relaxation, you can start to increase the time you spend doing fun things.
and then you can start thinking about what comes next.
Click to expand...

Well, as much as I like banter, I just think that the lounge is a toxic environment for people with problems

And it's not funny :LOL:
 
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