starxstruck
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 8, 2014
- Messages
- 1
Friends With Benefits Confusion- Please Help
There are few questions regarding my friend with benefits that I have been pondering for some time now but haven't been able to find the answers to. I'm hoping to gain some insight by sharing my story and hearing the thoughts and opinions of others who may have had a similar experience.
I guess I should start off by explaining my situation. Last August of 2013, I met an amazing guy. I had an immediate physical and emotional attraction to him. We hit it off fantastically and it was pretty clear we were very much into eachother. He was an absolute sweetheart. Called me by adorable names (sweetie, cutie, babe etc), was extremely affectionate and very passionate in bed. For our first date, he had me over to his place for drinks and made a fantastic Indian dish (my favourite!) We spent the night talking and laughing and just really getting to know eachother. At one point he asked me if I'd consider moving closer to him so we could spend more time together. I thought it was going well until one day he sent me a text explaining that although he was really into me, the distance was too hard for him (we live an hour away, and I do not currently drive) to have the relationship with me that he wanted. We hooked up once after that conversation and then it was over. Needless to say, I was pretty disappointed. Especially when he later started dating someone else.
5 months later and his relationship with his gf ended. He sent me a text asking how I was, what I had been up to and mentioned that he did think about messaging me a few times over the last several months but thought I disliked him and chose not to. He didn't mention his current breakup until I asked how things between them were going (I felt terrible for bringing it up after). We've been hooking up casually since as FWB....something we never discussed, it just happened. I'm starting to realize I may have initial feelings for him resurfacing but I'm extremely unsure how he feels about me. I get some what mixed signals from him.
For example: the fact that he's willing to drive an hour down to pick me up and take me back to his place when he could get laid by someone who is local but chooses me insted boggles my mind. He also really enjoys when I stay the night and loves to cuddle after sex and be intament (even the morning after waking up) as well as cooking me dinner/breakfast. Always mentions how much he enjoys being around me and spending time with me. Always complimenting me on my personality, "good looks" and my sense of humor. I feel as though he treats me a little more than just a FWB.
The thing that got me really thinking was when we got together the other weekend. Like always, he came and picked me up. Went back to his place and hooked up. But afterwards we went out for dinner. Our first time out together as FWB. We then hit up his friend's place where a fun evening occurred. I met quite a few of his friends including his older brother. As the night went on and my FWB had loosen up with a few drinks, he began to call me cutie and babe ( it had been a long time since he had called me anything) and he wasn't hesitant to kiss me infront of his friends. He even almost seemed proud of me in the sense that he was bragging about me to his friends and seemed happy I was there. You know what they say...liquor tends to loosen the lips allowing the truth to slip.
Again. It's hard to tell with him though. There's a part of me that feels he's holding back. So here are my questions: is there a possibility that he may be harboring feelings towards me but doesn't want to get attached due to the long distance? Could it very well be that the timing is off? If he's not into me, is there a chance that an old flame may respark down the road? Are there ways I could attempt to reignite his interest?
I'm happy with the way things are between us but my subtle feelings have me curious. Thanks in advanced for all the advice and help. If any genuine male members have advice, I would also like to hear from your point of view.
Cheers! Xo
There are few questions regarding my friend with benefits that I have been pondering for some time now but haven't been able to find the answers to. I'm hoping to gain some insight by sharing my story and hearing the thoughts and opinions of others who may have had a similar experience.
I guess I should start off by explaining my situation. Last August of 2013, I met an amazing guy. I had an immediate physical and emotional attraction to him. We hit it off fantastically and it was pretty clear we were very much into eachother. He was an absolute sweetheart. Called me by adorable names (sweetie, cutie, babe etc), was extremely affectionate and very passionate in bed. For our first date, he had me over to his place for drinks and made a fantastic Indian dish (my favourite!) We spent the night talking and laughing and just really getting to know eachother. At one point he asked me if I'd consider moving closer to him so we could spend more time together. I thought it was going well until one day he sent me a text explaining that although he was really into me, the distance was too hard for him (we live an hour away, and I do not currently drive) to have the relationship with me that he wanted. We hooked up once after that conversation and then it was over. Needless to say, I was pretty disappointed. Especially when he later started dating someone else.
5 months later and his relationship with his gf ended. He sent me a text asking how I was, what I had been up to and mentioned that he did think about messaging me a few times over the last several months but thought I disliked him and chose not to. He didn't mention his current breakup until I asked how things between them were going (I felt terrible for bringing it up after). We've been hooking up casually since as FWB....something we never discussed, it just happened. I'm starting to realize I may have initial feelings for him resurfacing but I'm extremely unsure how he feels about me. I get some what mixed signals from him.
For example: the fact that he's willing to drive an hour down to pick me up and take me back to his place when he could get laid by someone who is local but chooses me insted boggles my mind. He also really enjoys when I stay the night and loves to cuddle after sex and be intament (even the morning after waking up) as well as cooking me dinner/breakfast. Always mentions how much he enjoys being around me and spending time with me. Always complimenting me on my personality, "good looks" and my sense of humor. I feel as though he treats me a little more than just a FWB.
The thing that got me really thinking was when we got together the other weekend. Like always, he came and picked me up. Went back to his place and hooked up. But afterwards we went out for dinner. Our first time out together as FWB. We then hit up his friend's place where a fun evening occurred. I met quite a few of his friends including his older brother. As the night went on and my FWB had loosen up with a few drinks, he began to call me cutie and babe ( it had been a long time since he had called me anything) and he wasn't hesitant to kiss me infront of his friends. He even almost seemed proud of me in the sense that he was bragging about me to his friends and seemed happy I was there. You know what they say...liquor tends to loosen the lips allowing the truth to slip.
Again. It's hard to tell with him though. There's a part of me that feels he's holding back. So here are my questions: is there a possibility that he may be harboring feelings towards me but doesn't want to get attached due to the long distance? Could it very well be that the timing is off? If he's not into me, is there a chance that an old flame may respark down the road? Are there ways I could attempt to reignite his interest?
I'm happy with the way things are between us but my subtle feelings have me curious. Thanks in advanced for all the advice and help. If any genuine male members have advice, I would also like to hear from your point of view.
Cheers! Xo
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