eyezpinned
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2011
- Messages
- 1
I kind of just figured I’d type up a little something on my transition from methadone to suboxone for anyone considering doing the same. first my background: I’m 31 years old and originally got on methadone at 25 after failing repeatedly to get clean via rehab. At the time I had tried methadone maintenance once before at a "cash and carry" clinic in Delaware. Basically it was $70 a week, no questions asked. During this time I was actually prescribed 90 80 mg oxycontin per month which I was selling to support a heroin habit. I honestly thought I could go on methadone and just sell off my pills and be content. The fact that this clinic had virtually no counseling/methadone information for new clients should have raised a red flag, but I didn't care. I had it all figured out.
My dose went as high as 90 mg, which made me really tired. At this time I cut back on other opiates, but started to shoot a lot of cocaine. Long story short, after about 8 months I was feetoxed for not paying and ended up back in rehab. After a few months I was back on heroin and kicked off the oxys because I got arrested for coping dope and my doc saw it in the paper). I have a really tough time being totally clean, so I decided to give methadone, at a better program, another chance.
The second program was more like intensive outpatient methadone maintenance. I started off doing 3, 1 hour groups a week, along with a weekly one on one, and a weekly methadone info class. My average dose after stabilizing was about 35 mgs. That particular program saved my life. In the 6 years there, I was able to straighten out my legal problems, get an apartment, and get a bachelor's degree. I graduated this past may. I decided I had achieved everything I had set out to achieve on the program, so I started a slow taper. I got as low as 25 mgs tapering 1 mg every 10 days. Then the cravings came back.
I started to dabble and since I had only given 2 hot urines in 6 years (1 for opiates, 1 for alcohol), was able to fake my monthly urine with no suspicion by staying clean long enough to make batches of methadone only urine. I didn’t want to go back up on my dose, and to make matters worse my transmission went in my car. The maximum number of take homes for this clinic was a whopping 3, so I still had to make it up there 4 days a week.
I knew I was at a low enough dose where I could feasibly give subs a shot, and I had been in the 30 mg range for awhile, so it wasn't like I was uncomfortable (besides cravings). I made an appointment for a Tuesday. The Friday before my appointment I had a urine come back for opiates (apparently I didn’t wait long enough that batch). I walked off. I wasn’t going to be removed from the clinic, but my take homes would be taken, and I’d probably be asked to attend more groups.
For the days leading up to my appointment, I got high. I saw the sub doc right before thanksgiving, and started a few days before. I took the subs for 2 days and felt horrible. No appetite, insomnia, depression. No wds, but that was the only positive thing. I started to use again full time. Between thanksgiving and New Year’s, my habit ballooned to 2 bundles a day of West Philly’s finest.
New Year’s day, I decided it was time to stop. Money was getting tight; me and my girlfriend both had habits again. I took my first sub (this try) Monday morning. I again experienced symptoms similar to the first time. I actually got so scared I made my way back to my old methadone clinic, convinced I was going to fail. I knew I’d have to start over, but fuck it, I did awesome on methadone. Then it happened, they wanted me to start dosing methadone in a 7- 10 day rehab. Needless to say I thought that was a little much. I decided to stick it out with the subs. A friend of mine tried to convince me that these symptoms would subside.
Day 2 I still had no appetite and couldn’t sleep. Today is day 6. I’ve been eating regularly for the past 2 days and had a full night sleep last night. I am no longer feeling depressed either. I would however caution anyone on a high stable methadone dose. There is a big difference that may be too much to adjust to. Anyone on an everyday dose less than 30 mg, I would say that after you stabilize, the feeling is a lot similar to methadone. I took 16 mgs the first 3 days and 12 mgs the last 3 days. I plan on cutting back like this until I find a minimum stable dose.I don’t buy the whole “suboxone makes you feel sober.” I will agree that it makes you feel considerably less lit than a healthy dose of methadone, but I was on such a low dose I didn’t get lit anyway. I do have fewer cravings (almost none) as compared to the lower dose of methadone on which I was having cravings and using. I’m not really plotting my next run because I’d probably pop a sub before id wait the couple days for it to stop blocking opiates. We’ll see I guess. I’m going to post to document my progress. Feel free to give me feedback. I’ll be totally honest with what’s going on with me (won’t dismiss a relapse etc.).
My dose went as high as 90 mg, which made me really tired. At this time I cut back on other opiates, but started to shoot a lot of cocaine. Long story short, after about 8 months I was feetoxed for not paying and ended up back in rehab. After a few months I was back on heroin and kicked off the oxys because I got arrested for coping dope and my doc saw it in the paper). I have a really tough time being totally clean, so I decided to give methadone, at a better program, another chance.
The second program was more like intensive outpatient methadone maintenance. I started off doing 3, 1 hour groups a week, along with a weekly one on one, and a weekly methadone info class. My average dose after stabilizing was about 35 mgs. That particular program saved my life. In the 6 years there, I was able to straighten out my legal problems, get an apartment, and get a bachelor's degree. I graduated this past may. I decided I had achieved everything I had set out to achieve on the program, so I started a slow taper. I got as low as 25 mgs tapering 1 mg every 10 days. Then the cravings came back.
I started to dabble and since I had only given 2 hot urines in 6 years (1 for opiates, 1 for alcohol), was able to fake my monthly urine with no suspicion by staying clean long enough to make batches of methadone only urine. I didn’t want to go back up on my dose, and to make matters worse my transmission went in my car. The maximum number of take homes for this clinic was a whopping 3, so I still had to make it up there 4 days a week.
I knew I was at a low enough dose where I could feasibly give subs a shot, and I had been in the 30 mg range for awhile, so it wasn't like I was uncomfortable (besides cravings). I made an appointment for a Tuesday. The Friday before my appointment I had a urine come back for opiates (apparently I didn’t wait long enough that batch). I walked off. I wasn’t going to be removed from the clinic, but my take homes would be taken, and I’d probably be asked to attend more groups.
For the days leading up to my appointment, I got high. I saw the sub doc right before thanksgiving, and started a few days before. I took the subs for 2 days and felt horrible. No appetite, insomnia, depression. No wds, but that was the only positive thing. I started to use again full time. Between thanksgiving and New Year’s, my habit ballooned to 2 bundles a day of West Philly’s finest.
New Year’s day, I decided it was time to stop. Money was getting tight; me and my girlfriend both had habits again. I took my first sub (this try) Monday morning. I again experienced symptoms similar to the first time. I actually got so scared I made my way back to my old methadone clinic, convinced I was going to fail. I knew I’d have to start over, but fuck it, I did awesome on methadone. Then it happened, they wanted me to start dosing methadone in a 7- 10 day rehab. Needless to say I thought that was a little much. I decided to stick it out with the subs. A friend of mine tried to convince me that these symptoms would subside.
Day 2 I still had no appetite and couldn’t sleep. Today is day 6. I’ve been eating regularly for the past 2 days and had a full night sleep last night. I am no longer feeling depressed either. I would however caution anyone on a high stable methadone dose. There is a big difference that may be too much to adjust to. Anyone on an everyday dose less than 30 mg, I would say that after you stabilize, the feeling is a lot similar to methadone. I took 16 mgs the first 3 days and 12 mgs the last 3 days. I plan on cutting back like this until I find a minimum stable dose.I don’t buy the whole “suboxone makes you feel sober.” I will agree that it makes you feel considerably less lit than a healthy dose of methadone, but I was on such a low dose I didn’t get lit anyway. I do have fewer cravings (almost none) as compared to the lower dose of methadone on which I was having cravings and using. I’m not really plotting my next run because I’d probably pop a sub before id wait the couple days for it to stop blocking opiates. We’ll see I guess. I’m going to post to document my progress. Feel free to give me feedback. I’ll be totally honest with what’s going on with me (won’t dismiss a relapse etc.).
