Hey guys, so last night I was on one bar of Xanax, smoked two bowls of Gorilla Glue, and about 2 shots (not the best idea I know), and my friend had some coke (a mix about 80% Coke 20% Vicodin), and he offered me some. I've probably been offered cocaine on 20 different occasions, and every time turned it down. I used to feel as if I could never live with myself if I did something hard like Coke. Anyways, that philosophy got thrown out the window, and I took two, about average apparently, sized lines, i'd say in total no more than .3-.4 all in all. I woke up today, surprisingly feeling not so bad. A little "off", and I'm generally used to do that, but today was a little different. I know I probably sound like a huge pussy, but even typing this out makes me feel like such a scumbag knowing I did all these drugs because it's what I used to be against. Regardless, I'm just wondering if this almost guilty feeling is common in some people (I was raised in an anti-drug family with a dad that tokes on the DL). In addition to that, would a one time use such as mine cause any brain damage? I hate for making this so long but I appreciate everyone so much for taking their time to go through this as it means a lot to me.
-
BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic
First time Cocaine use...?
- Thread starter Maxa2K
- Start date
psy997
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Messages
- 2,822
That's really not too long a post, don't apologize. You're asking for help, don't feel guilty about doing that as well.
Yes, it is normal at the beginning of most people's drug careers to have to face guilt, shame, and the like as has been implanted by family and society at large. The key is to working through it, not allowing it to overtake and consume you.
In regards to safety, if you actually smoked two bowls of gorilla glue, and that's not a strain of bud I'm unfamiliar with, then that's dangerous as fuck right there. Otherwise if it is weed, doing that amount of cocaine is pretty safe. Cocaine really isn't too dangerous if used safely.
Yes, it is normal at the beginning of most people's drug careers to have to face guilt, shame, and the like as has been implanted by family and society at large. The key is to working through it, not allowing it to overtake and consume you.
In regards to safety, if you actually smoked two bowls of gorilla glue, and that's not a strain of bud I'm unfamiliar with, then that's dangerous as fuck right there. Otherwise if it is weed, doing that amount of cocaine is pretty safe. Cocaine really isn't too dangerous if used safely.
Nah man I was huffing straight bowls of wood glue hahaha jk but yea thanks for the courtesy and I assumed so but I always like to make use. Another question that just hit me, the nose I snorted with last night is bleeding and feels rather dry, I assume that's normal but I just wanna make sure?
psy997
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Messages
- 2,822
Ehhhhh not exactly normal, but not super rare. Nosebleeds are common when snorting anything, but it usually only happens after using for multiple days in a row. One night of use, and not that heavy of use from the sounds of it, shouldn't cause nosebleeds. Where are you located? I'd imagine it's been cut with something that's not so nice on the nose as cocaine is. At least that'd be my guess. Or maybe if your sinuses were already pretty irritated it could cause it. Or even being too rough with whatever you were using to snort it with - dollar bill, straw, etc. - and that cutting your nose.
itsYaboyMB
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2017
- Messages
- 6
Do a small line or even a bump wait 30mins and see how you feel. Coke will over power your drunk ness and will empty your wallet especially if there are females around lol
I talked to my friend and he gets it from a very reliable source. Turns out it wasn't really broken down into a more powdery form so it was more rocky than usual, in addition to being my first time snorting anything LIKE cocaine. And when I say my nose was bleeding, there wasn't blood gushing out of my nose haha, just if my blew my nose there would be small amounts of blood present.
SKL
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Sep 15, 2007
- Messages
- 14,647
1. 80 coke/20 crushed vicodin? wtf? there is no reason for this. you won't be getting any appreciable amount of the active drugs in vicodin in, and snorting 20% pill binders rather than actual drugs is almost certainly why you had a nose bleed. do people actually do this? was it sold to you as such or do you have friends who really, really, don't know what they're doing? a pill of Vicodin, which is rather large, has to weigh something close to a gram, and has 5-10mg (thousands of a gram) worth of drugs [hydrocodone]in it, and it takes more than that to catch a decent buzz for most people, so there's absolutely no reason for this practice. as pills are harder to crush than cocaine, this was probably what the large particles were, and given that part of their actual job in the pill is to prevent it from dissolving in moisture, well, you can figure it out.
anyway vicodin is not a drug that you snort (only small pills have a reasonable ratio of active drug : inert binder to make this worthwhile, which are also water soluble (which is not the cases for xanax and almost all benzodiazepines), e.g. Roxicodone, Oxycodone, (maybe, stretching it) strong pills of Ritalin, Adderall, etc. and it's not really that great an idea even then.)
2. when you said "Gorilla Glue" I was sure you were was talking about sniffing glue before giving it a second read.
3. why this makes you feel like a scumbag and Xanax and pot do not is beyond me. feel like a scumbag when you start stealing from people to feed a habit, which is exceedingly unlikely to happen from doing reasonable amounts of cocaine in a social setting, this doesn't even really qualify as "hard drug use" even if you buy into that category (which I don't)
anyway vicodin is not a drug that you snort (only small pills have a reasonable ratio of active drug : inert binder to make this worthwhile, which are also water soluble (which is not the cases for xanax and almost all benzodiazepines), e.g. Roxicodone, Oxycodone, (maybe, stretching it) strong pills of Ritalin, Adderall, etc. and it's not really that great an idea even then.)
2. when you said "Gorilla Glue" I was sure you were was talking about sniffing glue before giving it a second read.
3. why this makes you feel like a scumbag and Xanax and pot do not is beyond me. feel like a scumbag when you start stealing from people to feed a habit, which is exceedingly unlikely to happen from doing reasonable amounts of cocaine in a social setting, this doesn't even really qualify as "hard drug use" even if you buy into that category (which I don't)
krazykenneth
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 28, 2017
- Messages
- 4
I used coke for nearly 20 years, starting at the age of 18. Additionally I have tried just about every drug in common use in the western world. Of the thousands of times I have used coke I can't be sure whether they were mostly good or bad experiences. I certainly have had some awesome times on it but also some really regretable ones as well. It's taken me to some dark places. Physically and mentally. Literally and metaphorically. I've seen it dramatically effect my friends lives and state of mind and not in a good way. If I could take it back and never try it I would. Fortunately though after several failed attempts to stop I did manage to 3 years ago and I haven't done it since. Once you decide sincerely you've had enough of something it's easy to stop. I don't say I quit cos I don't wanna feel trapped but I know I won't do it ever again. I strongly recommend to anyone and everyone to never start using coke. You will save yourself a world of pain. I know it's hypocrytical and easy for me to say having had my fun but i'm not saying don't take drugs. I'm saying don't take coke. There are plenty of other drugs out there that are far more fun and far less destructive. Trying it once btw doesn't make you a user and it's not too late to stop and not take it again. Good luck.
undertoker
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 4, 2010
- Messages
- 92
I have to agree with KrazyKenneth don't try coke, especially if you have denied it 20 times thus far. Read my topic in drug culture about cocaine. Once you fall in love with coke, its for life till you die. If its good purity coke, sniffing one line will not cause brain damage but will cause an addiction immediately regardless of who you are.
By itself cocaine is fun, when you combine it with opiates or weed it becomes super euphoric. I would not travel down this road!
By itself cocaine is fun, when you combine it with opiates or weed it becomes super euphoric. I would not travel down this road!
psy997
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jul 9, 2012
- Messages
- 2,822
Excuse me? 8(
irongoooch
Greenlighter
- Joined
- May 4, 2016
- Messages
- 2
First, I wanna apologize for the long post, but it's my first post on this website ever, and I just felt the need to write this all out because I feel like I was in a similar situation as you, with coke and other drugs at one point in my life.
I too grew up in a family environment that was very anti-drugs, however, the older I became the more I, along with many other people I assume, began separating drugs into groups, which were typically based on how "bad" or "hard" they were. Now obviously meth and coke are both "harder" drugs than weed, everyone knows that, but I think that this separation of drugs into groups is what started me out into exploring them. Alcohol was something I tried at a young age, and by high school I was smoking weed, both of which I was initially afraid to try or do because of all of the negative things associated with them, mostly weed at the time. So my reason for saying all of this is that I can remember in high school, before smoking weed, that I was never going to, but then I became interested because others did it, and I soon did it myself as it didn't seem that "bad", and it certainly was nowhere near as "bad" as cocaine is, so I felt justified in a way, like I could be doing "harder" drugs and really be fucking up. So after experiencing weed and loving it in college, I used to always say I would never do coke, or meth, or heroin. But then I discovered adderall, which I think colleges in the past few decades have done a fantastic job of unintentionally introducing college kids to it, and my life changed. I took it and felt like superman, then over the course of purchasing it from a friend for two years, I finally got my own prescription, and even did my senior research project on the mechanism of action of adderall in the brain. Long story short, I tried coke for the first time after having taken adderall for nearly 3 years, not everyday, but pretty close, and I only decided to actually do coke when I would be out of adderall. So I did coke, and honestly I think it's a waste of money, now I don't know how pure the coke that I received actually was, but I'd say it was pretty decent, and my biggest issue with coke is that you get the same feeling from coke that adderall gives you, but it only last for like an hour and it's waaaaay more expensive. Now, like I mentioned, it could have been terrible coke, it's possible, but why I think I don't like it is because of my super high tolerance for pharm-grade amphetamines, and my love for adderall. But to answer your first question, yes, I have felt the guilt you're talking about before, as I know many, many others have, but the level at which the guilt effects you is determined by how guilty you make yourself feel. What I'm saying is, if you've done drugs before, any drugs, you've done it because you were curious or wanted to feel something that you're lacking, and that's fine. I feel that if you, in your own mind, weigh the pros and the cons, and the pros win, then try it. It's just ultimately up to you to control that use of the drug, whatever it may be, and to not allow yourself to make yourself feel bad for doing it. Also, when I did coke, the actual act of snorting the cocaine wasn't what made me feel guilty, however, it was during the drives I would make to the seller to buy it that I would feel the most guilt, because I was consciously bringing myself to go obtain a drug that I once felt so opposed about ever doing. But once you get over that aspect of it, the mental part, you'll be fine. Oh, and last thing, I guess I'm also saying that there are better drugs out there, so if you really want to experience a speedy high, try and get your hands on some addys.
I too grew up in a family environment that was very anti-drugs, however, the older I became the more I, along with many other people I assume, began separating drugs into groups, which were typically based on how "bad" or "hard" they were. Now obviously meth and coke are both "harder" drugs than weed, everyone knows that, but I think that this separation of drugs into groups is what started me out into exploring them. Alcohol was something I tried at a young age, and by high school I was smoking weed, both of which I was initially afraid to try or do because of all of the negative things associated with them, mostly weed at the time. So my reason for saying all of this is that I can remember in high school, before smoking weed, that I was never going to, but then I became interested because others did it, and I soon did it myself as it didn't seem that "bad", and it certainly was nowhere near as "bad" as cocaine is, so I felt justified in a way, like I could be doing "harder" drugs and really be fucking up. So after experiencing weed and loving it in college, I used to always say I would never do coke, or meth, or heroin. But then I discovered adderall, which I think colleges in the past few decades have done a fantastic job of unintentionally introducing college kids to it, and my life changed. I took it and felt like superman, then over the course of purchasing it from a friend for two years, I finally got my own prescription, and even did my senior research project on the mechanism of action of adderall in the brain. Long story short, I tried coke for the first time after having taken adderall for nearly 3 years, not everyday, but pretty close, and I only decided to actually do coke when I would be out of adderall. So I did coke, and honestly I think it's a waste of money, now I don't know how pure the coke that I received actually was, but I'd say it was pretty decent, and my biggest issue with coke is that you get the same feeling from coke that adderall gives you, but it only last for like an hour and it's waaaaay more expensive. Now, like I mentioned, it could have been terrible coke, it's possible, but why I think I don't like it is because of my super high tolerance for pharm-grade amphetamines, and my love for adderall. But to answer your first question, yes, I have felt the guilt you're talking about before, as I know many, many others have, but the level at which the guilt effects you is determined by how guilty you make yourself feel. What I'm saying is, if you've done drugs before, any drugs, you've done it because you were curious or wanted to feel something that you're lacking, and that's fine. I feel that if you, in your own mind, weigh the pros and the cons, and the pros win, then try it. It's just ultimately up to you to control that use of the drug, whatever it may be, and to not allow yourself to make yourself feel bad for doing it. Also, when I did coke, the actual act of snorting the cocaine wasn't what made me feel guilty, however, it was during the drives I would make to the seller to buy it that I would feel the most guilt, because I was consciously bringing myself to go obtain a drug that I once felt so opposed about ever doing. But once you get over that aspect of it, the mental part, you'll be fine. Oh, and last thing, I guess I'm also saying that there are better drugs out there, so if you really want to experience a speedy high, try and get your hands on some addys.